Hi all, I ended up condensing this story a lot and I changed the trajectory of some of the students. I added a new student (Rachel) and took out another (Sarah). Hopefully you all liked this story! I took out some of the "fluff" scenes and decided just to focus on college stuff for the most part.
This is it *phew*. I had to split in two parts because Reddit has a 40k character limit.
Link for Part 2 below Reddit - Dive into anything
IntroductionEthan Green:

• GPA: 3.6
• SAT score: 1590
• Top 5 extracurriculars: Math Club, School Band (Guitar), Chess Club, Tutoring, Art Club

Julie Green:

• GPA: 4.0
• SAT score: 1500
• Top 5 extracurriculars: School Newspaper (Editor-in-Chief), School Band (Guitar), Model United Nations, Yearbook Club, Environmental Club

Priya Rabinowitz:

• GPA: 4.0
• SAT score: 1570
• Top 5 extracurriculars: Student Council (President), Debate Team, Key Club, National Honor Society, Volunteer at local non-profit organization

Matthew Hernandez:

• GPA: 4.0
• SAT score: 1580
• Top 5 extracurriculars: Science Olympiad, Math Club, Robotics Club, Peer Tutoring, Community Service Club

Rachel Lee:

• GPA: 3.8
• SAT score: 1460
• Top 5 extracurriculars: Creative Writing Club, School Newspaper, Drama Club, Art Club, National Honor Society

David Anderson:

• GPA: 3.7
• SAT score: 1410
• Top 5 extracurriculars: Varsity Football (Quarterback), Student-Athlete Leadership Council, Business Club, School Spirit Committee, Volunteer at local youth sports organization

Minho Park:

• GPA: 4.0
• SAT score: 1590
• Top 5 extracurriculars: Computer Science Club, Math Club, Science Olympiad, Robotics Club, USACO (USA Computing Olympiad) participant

Alicia Davis:

• GPA: 3.9
• SAT score: 1520
• Top 5 extracurriculars: Debate Team, Mock Trial, Model United Nations, Volunteer at local community center, National Honor Society

Alex Madrigal:

• GPA: 4.0
• SAT score: 1550
• Top 5 extracurriculars: Math Club, Science Olympiad, Soccer Team, School Newspaper, Spanish Club

Taylor Chen:

• GPA: 3.8
• SAT score: 1480
• Top 5 extracurriculars: Art Club, LGBT+ Alliance, Drama Club, Environmental Club, School Newspaper (Arts Section)

Raj Singh:

• GPA: 4.0
• SAT score: 1560
• Top 5 extracurriculars: Debate Team, Model United Nations, Science Olympiad, National Honor Society, School Newspaper (Opinions Editor)

Mary Sinclair:

• GPA: 3.9
• SAT score: 1510
• Top 5 extracurriculars: Art Club, Student Council (Vice President), School Newspaper (Features Editor), Yearbook Club, Community Service Club

Chapter 1: Beginning of Senior Year The crisp autumn air swirled around Green Hills High School, a prestigious public high school nestled in the suburbs of New York City. A sense of urgency and anticipation permeated the school, as the college admissions season had arrived. The pressures of academic achievement and looming deadlines weighed heavily on the shoulders of the senior class, who each bore their own unique dreams and aspirations. Among them were twelve students, each with distinct backgrounds and stories, all vying for a chance to secure a place at their dream colleges.
Ethan Green, an academically gifted slacker, found his once-promising future in jeopardy due to personal struggles and substance abuse. However, a stunning 1590 on the SATs breathed new life into his aspirations, rekindling his desire to attend the University of Chicago. With the unwavering support of his twin sister Julie, a straight-A student with a passion for music, Ethan began the arduous journey of repairing his tarnished transcript. Julie, on the other hand, had her heart set on Duke University, where she hoped to pursue a career in journalism.
Priya Rabinowitz, a brilliant, mixed-race overachiever, was the epitome of a perfect student. Her dream was to attend Brown University, driven by her passion for social justice. Despite her many accomplishments, she harbored a secret fear of not being "good enough." Her best friend, Rachel Lee, shared a similar sentiment, feeling inadequate in comparison to her academically perfect older brother Brian, and her high-achieving friend, Priya.
Matthew Hernandez, a top student with perfect grades and a near-perfect SAT score, dreamed of attending Harvard University, but his impoverished background made paying for college seem like an insurmountable challenge. At the same time, David Anderson, the school's star quarterback, yearned to attend Stanford and study business, but feared that his intelligence would be overshadowed by his athletic prowess.
Minho Park, a computer science prodigy who moved from South Korea at a young age, aimed to attend a prestigious school like MIT, Caltech, or Stanford. Alicia Davis, one of the few black students at Green Hills High School, aspired to attend Georgetown University and become a lawyer, her warm personality making her a natural confidante to her peers.
Alex Madrigal, another top student with a passion for math, science, and soccer, focused on getting into Stanford University. Meanwhile, Taylor Chen, a recently out nonbinary student, sought a college that would provide a safe and supportive environment for them to thrive.
Raj Singh, a senior at Green Hills High School who excelled in debate, hoped to attend Yale University. Lastly, Mary Sinclair, a talented artist who faced the pressures of being a double legacy at Brown University, worried that she may not truly be qualified for the prestigious institution.
As the college admissions season unfolded, these twelve seniors navigated the treacherous waters of self-discovery, friendship, and ambition, their journeys intertwining and shaping one another in ways they could never have imagined. The story of Green Hills High School's senior class was one of hope, heartache, and the relentless pursuit of dreams, all set against the backdrop of an unforgiving, competitive world.
Chapter 2: Applying Early The sun had barely risen on November 1st, the day when early college applications were due. A flurry of last-minute edits and double-checking consumed the lives of Green Hills High School's seniors as they prepared to submit their applications. The twelve friends, united by their dreams, sat together in the school library, each nervously finalizing their college applications.
Ethan, his heart pounding, reviewed his application one last time before hitting the submit button for Early Decision at the University of Chicago. He felt a mixture of excitement and trepidation as he considered the possibility of attending his dream school.
Julie, sitting beside her twin, took a deep breath and clicked submit on her Early Decision application to Duke University. She allowed herself a brief moment of relief, knowing she had poured her heart into her application and showcased her love for journalism.
Priya's hands trembled as she applied Early Decision to Brown University, her anxiety about being "good enough" momentarily set aside in the hope that her passion for social justice would shine through.
Rachel, her heart racing, sent off her Early Decision application to Columbia University, trying to shake off the pressure from her family and praying that her talents as a writer would be enough to secure her a spot at the prestigious institution.
Matthew, his jaw clenched, submitted his Restricted Early Action application to Harvard University, knowing that his future depended on receiving sufficient financial aid. He hoped that his stellar academic achievements would make it impossible for Harvard to turn him away.
David's eyes were filled with determination as he sent off his Restricted Early Action application to Stanford University, after completing his football tryouts. He hoped that the admissions officers would see his potential both on the field and in the classroom.
Minho, his fingers tapping anxiously, submitted his Early Action application to MIT. He had poured his heart into his computer science projects and was eager to showcase his passion and talent in his application.
Alicia, with a supportive smile from her friends, applied Early Action to Georgetown University. Her dream of becoming a lawyer seemed closer than ever as she hit the submit button, the pride she felt in herself evident in her eyes.
Alex, filled with anticipation, sent off his Restricted Early Action application to Stanford University. He knew that his academic achievements and passion for soccer had the potential to make him stand out in the competitive applicant pool.
Taylor, their hands shaking with nerves, applied Early Decision to Swarthmore College. They hoped that the accepting environment of the school would allow them to embrace their nonbinary identity and pursue their artistic passions.
Raj, his heart pounding, submitted his Restricted Early Action application to Yale University. He knew that his father would have been proud of his accomplishments, and he hoped that his debate skills and determination would be enough to secure a place at his dream school.
Mary, her face a mixture of hope and worry, applied Early Decision to Brown University. Despite her double legacy status, she longed to be admitted based on her own merits and her passion for art, rather than her family connections.
As the twelve friends hit the submit buttons on their applications, a collective sigh of relief filled the library. They had taken the first, crucial step in the college admissions process, their dreams laid bare for the admissions officers to see. The waiting game had begun, and their futures hung in the balance, but for now, they took solace in their shared journey, knowing that whatever the outcome, they had each other's support.
Chapter 3: Early Admissions Results
It was a chilly December evening when the early decision and early action results were released. The twelve friends gathered at Ethan and Julie's house, huddled around their laptops and phones, each waiting with bated breath for the email that would determine their future.
Ethan opened his email first, his eyes widening as he read the words, "Congratulations!" He had been accepted to the University of Chicago! The room erupted in cheers and applause as Julie hugged her twin, her pride in his accomplishment shining in her eyes.
Next, Julie nervously opened her own email, letting out a squeal of joy as she discovered that she had been accepted to Duke University. Her dream of studying journalism at the prestigious institution was now a reality, and her friends celebrated with her, sharing in her happiness.
Priya's hands shook as she opened her email from Brown University, only to find that she had been deferred. Her heart sank, and she tried to mask her disappointment with a smile. Rachel, whose application to Columbia University had been rejected, wrapped an arm around her friend, offering silent support.
Matthew's face fell as he read that his application to Harvard had also been deferred. He fought back the fear that his family's financial situation might prevent him from attending his dream school, even if he were ultimately accepted.
David beamed with pride as he announced that he had been accepted to Stanford University to play football. His friends cheered for him, although Alex couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy, knowing he was more academically qualified. Alex's own email from Stanford revealed that he had been deferred, causing the disappointment to settle heavier in his heart.
Minho's face lit up with joy as he discovered that he had been accepted to MIT. His friends congratulated him, knowing that his hard work and dedication to computer science had paid off. Alicia, too, had reason to celebrate, as she was accepted to Georgetown University, one step closer to her dream of becoming a lawyer.
Taylor's heart raced as they opened their email from Swarthmore College, only to find that they had been deferred. They tried to remain hopeful, knowing that the college search was far from over.
Raj's face paled as he read that he had been rejected from Yale University. The disappointment stung, but his friends rallied around him, reminding him of his incredible accomplishments and assuring him that he would find the right college in the end.
Finally, Mary opened her email from Brown University and was met with the news of her acceptance. The room filled with cheers and congratulations, but Priya couldn't help feeling a twinge of jealousy. While Mary was a strong student, Priya's test scores and grades had been higher, and she knew that Mary's double legacy status had played a role in her acceptance.
As the evening came to an end, the twelve friends had experienced a roller coaster of emotions. Some had reason to celebrate, while others were met with disappointment, jealousy, or uncertainty. Despite the various outcomes, they knew that their friendship would remain steadfast. Together, they would continue to navigate the ups and downs of the college admissions process, their bonds only growing stronger as they faced an uncertain but hopeful future.
Chapter 4: A Few Random Scenes Before RD Decisions Income Brackets The twelve friends gathered at a local park on a sunny Saturday afternoon, enjoying each other's company as they picnicked and played games. As the sun began to dip in the sky, they sat on the grass in a circle, sharing their thoughts and experiences.
Alicia, ever the good listener, brought up a topic that they had all noticed but rarely discussed: their different income brackets. It was a sensitive subject, but Alicia felt that it was important for them to acknowledge and understand the unique challenges each of them faced.
Matthew, who came from a low-income family, hesitated before speaking up. "You know, sometimes it's really hard being one of the poorest students in our school. I've had to work a part-time job to help support my family, and that's meant less time for studying or extracurriculars." His friends nodded in sympathy, recognizing the additional pressure that Matthew faced in trying to balance his responsibilities.
Ethan, Julie, Minho, Alicia, and Taylor, who all came from middle-class families, shared their own struggles. "It's not always easy for us either," said Julie. "We may not have to worry as much about making ends meet, but we still feel the pressure to work hard and achieve our dreams without having a financial safety net to fall back on."
Priya, Rachel, David, Alex, and Raj, who were considered upper middle class, acknowledged the advantages they had but also shared their perspectives. "Sure, we have more resources," admitted Priya, "but it sometimes feels like there's an expectation for us to succeed no matter what. That pressure can be really overwhelming."
Mary, who came from an upper-class family, listened to her friends' experiences and nodded in understanding. "I know I'm fortunate," she said softly, "but it's not always easy being seen as the 'rich kid.' Sometimes people assume I don't have to work hard, or that I don't have my own problems. Money can't buy happiness, and it can't guarantee success either."
As the conversation continued, the friends found themselves opening up about their fears, insecurities, and the unique challenges they faced because of their different financial situations. They began to understand each other's perspectives more fully, realizing that no one had a perfect life, regardless of their income bracket.
The sun had almost set by the time the twelve friends decided to pack up and head home. As they walked together, they felt a renewed sense of unity and support. They knew that their friendship was more important than any financial differences, and they were grateful to have one another as they faced whatever challenges life had in store for them.
Ethan
The twelve friends were seated in the school library, working on a group project for their history class. Their task was to research and create a presentation on the American Revolution, and each student was responsible for a specific aspect of the project.
As they discussed their findings, Julie mentioned a piece of information that she couldn't quite recall. "I remember reading something about the Battle of Saratoga, but I can't remember the exact details," she admitted, frustrated.
Ethan, who had been quietly browsing through a book, glanced up and said, "Do you mean the fact that it was a turning point in the Revolutionary War because it convinced the French to support the American cause?"
Julie looked at him, surprised. "Yes, that's exactly it! How did you know?"
Ethan grinned sheepishly. "I saw it in one of the books we were using for research last week. I just happened to glance at the page, but it stuck in my head."
His friends exchanged glances, impressed by Ethan's uncanny ability to remember things he had only seen briefly. It was a talent they had all noticed before, but never really discussed.
Curious, Minho asked, "Ethan, do you have a photographic memory?"
Ethan shrugged. "I guess you could say that. I've always been able to remember things I've seen or read, even if it's just for a short moment. It's just something my brain does."
The group marveled at Ethan's unique skill, and they began to ask him questions about various historical events and figures. To their amazement, he was able to recall an incredible amount of information, often down to the exact page number where he had seen it.
As the group continued their project, they couldn't help but feel grateful for Ethan's extraordinary memory. His ability to retain and recall information made their research more efficient, and it quickly became clear that his talent would be a major asset in their project.
The friends were not only impressed by Ethan's photographic memory but also inspired by the way he used his gift to help the group. It was a reminder that each of them had their unique strengths, and when they worked together, there was no challenge they couldn't overcome.
Rachel The twelve friends had gathered at Priya's house for a relaxed weekend hangout. As they lounged in the living room, a pile of their old middle school yearbooks lay on the coffee table, stirring up nostalgic memories and laughter.
Raj picked up one of the yearbooks and flipped through the pages, pausing when he came across the "Creative Writing Club" section. He looked up at Rachel and said, "Hey, I remember you won a couple of writing contests back then. Are you still writing?"
Rachel blushed and nodded. "Yeah, I've been working on a few short stories recently."
Her friends exchanged glances, intrigued. "Would you mind sharing one with us?" Alicia asked gently, her eyes full of genuine interest.
With some hesitation, Rachel agreed and disappeared into her bag, retrieving a small notebook. Her friends gathered around her in anticipation as she flipped through the pages, searching for the story she wanted to share.
"Okay," Rachel said, taking a deep breath. "This one is called 'The Timekeeper's Daughter.'"
As she began to read, her friends listened intently. Rachel's words painted a vivid picture of a young girl named Lila, who lived in a world where time was a tangible currency. Lila's father was the town's Timekeeper, responsible for managing and distributing time to the citizens.
The story was filled with imaginative details and intricate descriptions that transported the friends into Lila's world. Rachel's writing was both elegant and engaging, seamlessly weaving together the threads of the plot as the story unfolded.
As Rachel's voice carried them through the emotional highs and lows of Lila's journey, her friends found themselves hanging onto every word. They felt the young girl's joy and sorrow, her determination and fear, and the ultimate resolution of her story.
When Rachel finally closed the notebook, the room was silent for a moment before it erupted into applause. Her friends marveled at the beauty of her storytelling, praising her extraordinary writing abilities.
"Rachel, that was incredible!" Julie exclaimed. "I felt like I was right there with Lila in that world. Your descriptions were so vivid, and the story was so unique and compelling."
"Yeah, you have a real gift," David added, his admiration evident in his voice. "You should consider writing a book someday."
Rachel blushed again, overwhelmed by their compliments. As her friends continued to praise her creative writing talents, she felt a newfound sense of confidence and determination to continue honing her craft.
For the twelve friends, the experience of listening to Rachel's story brought them closer together, as they were reminded once again of the diverse talents that each of them possessed. Together, they celebrated Rachel's extraordinary writing abilities and the unique gifts that each of them brought to their circle of friendship.
See link below for Part 2!

Over the past decades, yoga has become part of the Zeitgeist of affluent western societies, drawing housewives and hipsters, new agers and the aged, and body culture and corporate culture into a multibillion-dollar synergy. Like every Indian cultural artifact that it has embraced, the West views Indian yoga as an ancient, unchanging tradition, based on revelations received by the Vedic sages who, seated in the lotus pose, were the Indian forerunners of the flat-tummied yoga babes who grace the covers and webpages of such glossy periodicals and internet websites as the Yoga Journal and Yoga International.
In the United States in particular, yoga has become a commodity. as of 2018, no fewer than 36 million Americans were practicing yoga every year. For most people, this has meant going to a yoga center with yoga mats, yoga clothes, and yoga accessories, and practicing in groups under the guidance of a yoga instructor or trainer. here, yoga practice comprises a regimen of postures (āsanas), sometimes held for long periods of time, sometimes executed in rapid sequence, and often paired with regulated breathing (prāṇāyāma). Yoga entrepreneurs have branded their own styles of practice, from the superheated workout rooms of Bikram Yoga studios to storefronts offering “doga”: practicing yoga together with one’s dog. They have opened franchises, invented logos, packaged their practice regimens under Sanskrit names, and marketed a lifestyle that fuses yoga with leisure travel, healing spas, and seminars on eastern spirituality. “Yoga celebrities” have become a part of our vocabulary, and with celebrity has come the usual entourage of publicists, business managers, and lawyers. Yoga is mainstream. arguably India’s greatest cultural export, yoga has morphed into a mass cultural phenomenon.
Many yoga celebrities, as well as a strong percentage of less celebrated yoga instructors, combine their training with teachings on healing, spirituality, meditation, and India’s ancient yoga traditions, the Sanskrit-language Yoga Sūtra (YS) in particular. here, they are following the lead of the earliest yoga entrepreneurs, the Indian gurus who brought the gospel of yoga to western shores in the wake of Swami Vivekananda’s storied successes of the late nineteenth and early twentieth centuries. But what were India’s ancient yoga traditions, and what relationship do they have to the modern postural yoga that people are practicing across the world today? In fact, the yoga that is taught and practiced in the twenty-first century has very little in common with the yoga of the YS and other ancient yoga treatises. nearly all of our popular assumptions about yoga theory date from the past 150 years, and very few modern-day practices date from before the twelfth century. This is not the first time that people have “reinvented” yoga in their own image. This is a process that has been ongoing for at least two thousand years, with every age seemingly creating its own version and vision of yoga. one reason this has been possible is that yoga’s semantic field – the range of meanings of the term “yoga” – is so broad and the concept of yoga so malleable, that it has been possible to morph it into nearly any practice or process one might wish to choose. When seeking to define a tradition, it’s useful to begin by defining one’s terms, and it is here that problems arise. “Yoga” has a wider range of meanings than nearly any other word in the entire Sanskrit lexicon. The act of yoking an animal, as well as the yoke itself, is called yoga. In astronomy, a conjunction of planets or stars, as well as a constellation, is called yoga. When one mixes together various substances, that, too, can be called yoga. The word yoga has also been employed to denote a device, a recipe, a method, a strategy, a charm, an incantation, fraud, a trick, an endeavor, a combination, union, an arrangement, zeal, care, diligence, industriousness, discipline, use, application, contact, a sum total, and the Work of alchemists. But this is by no means an exhaustive list.
So, for example, the twentieth chapter of the ninth-century Netra Tantra, a Hindu scripture from Kashmir, describes what it calls gross, subtle and supreme yoga. Whereas gross yoga involves combating agents of demonic possession, subtle yoga is nothing more or less than a body of techniques for entering into and taking over other people’s bodies. As for supreme yoga, this is a process that involves superhuman female predators, called yoginīs, who eat people! By means of their supreme yoga, this text says, the yoginīs consume the sins of the body that would otherwise bind a person to suffering rebirth, and so open the way for the tantric practitioner’s identity with Śiva, that is, for his transformation into a god on earth. In this ninth-century source, there is no discussion whatsoever of postures or breath control, the prime markers of yoga as we know it today; and its discussion of the cakras appears, not in its chapter on the three yogas, but rather in its seventh chapter on dhyāna (“meditation”)! More troubling still, the third- to fourth-century YS and Bhagavad Gītā (Bhg), the two most widely cited textual sources for “classical yoga,” virtually ignore postures and breath control, each devoting a total of fewer than ten verses to these practices. They are far more concerned with the issue of human salvation, realized through the theory and practice of meditation in the YS and through concentration on the god Kṛṣṇa in the BhG.
INDIAN FOUNDATIONS OF YOGA THEORY AND PRACTICE
Clearly something is missing here. There is a gap between ancient, “classical,” yoga traditions and yoga as we know it. In order to understand the disconnect between then and now, we would do well to go back to the earliest uses of the term yoga, which are found in texts far more ancient than the YS or Bhg. here I am referring to India’s earliest scriptures, the Vedas. In the circa fifteenth-century BCE Ṛg Veda (RV), yoga meant, before all else, the yoke one placed on a draft animal – a bullock or warhorse – to yoke it to a plow or chariot. The resemblance of these terms is not fortuitous: the Sanskrit “yoga” is a cognate of the English “yoke,” because Sanskrit and English both belong to the Indo-European language family (which is why the Sanskrit mātṛ resembles the English “mother,” sveda looks like “sweat,” udara – “belly” in Sanskrit – looks like “udder,” and so forth). In the same scripture, we see the term’s meaning expanded through metonymy, with “yoga” being applied to the entire conveyance or “rig” of a war chariot: to the yoke itself, the team of horses or bullocks, and the chariot with its many straps and harnesses. and, because such chariots were only “yoked” (yukta) in times of war, an important Vedic usage of the term yoga was “wartime,” in contrast to kṣema, “peacetime.”
The Vedic reading of yoga as one’s war chariot or rig came to be incorporated into the warrior ideology of ancient India. In the Mahābhārata, India’s 200 BCE – 400 CE “national epic,” we find the earliest narrative accounts of the battlefield apotheosis of heroic chariot warriors. This was, like the Greek Iliad, an epic of battle, and so it was appropriate that the glorification of a warrior who died fighting his enemies be showcased here. What is interesting with respect to the history of the term yoga is that in these narratives, the warrior who knew he was about to die was said to become yoga-yukta, literally “yoked to yoga,” with “yoga” once again meaning a chariot. This time, however, it was not the warrior’s own chariot that carried him up to the highest heaven, reserved for gods and heroes alone. Rather, it was a celestial “yoga,” a divine chariot, that carried him upward in a burst of light to and through the sun, and on to the realm of the gods <“Were the eye not of the sun, How could we behold the light? If God’s might and ours were not as one, How could His work enchant our sight?” - Goethe>. Warriors were not the sole individuals of the Vedic age to have chariots called “yogas.” The gods, too, were said to shuttle across the heavens and between heaven and earth on yogas. Furthermore, the Vedic priests who sang the Vedic hymns related their practice to the yoga of the warrior aristocrats who were their patrons. In their hymns, they describe themselves as “yoking” their minds to poetic inspiration and so journeying – if only with their mind’s eye or cognitive apparatus – across the metaphorical distance that separated the world of the gods from the words of their hymns. a striking image of their poetic journeys is found in a verse from a late Rigvedic hymn, in which the poet-priests describe themselves as “hitched up” (yukta) and standing on their chariot shafts as they sally forth on a vision quest across the universe. [*6. Ṛg Veda 5.46.1, quoted in David Gordon White, Sinister Yogis (Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 2009), pp. 59-67. The authoritative translation of the Ṛg Veda is Stephanie W. Jamison and Joel P. Brereton The Rigveda: The Earliest Religious Poetry of India, 3 vols. (New York: oxford University Press, 2014).]
The earliest extant systematic account of yoga, and a bridge from the earlier Vedic uses of the term, is found in the Hindu Kaṭhaka Upaniṣad (KU), a scripture dating from about the third century BCE. Here, the god of death reveals what is termed the “entire yoga regimen” to a young ascetic named Naciketas. In the course of his teaching, death compares the relationship between the self, body, intellect, and so forth to the relationship between a rider, his chariot, charioteer, etc. (KU 3.3–9), a comparison which approximates that made by Plato in his Phaedrus (246a-256e). Three elements of this text set the agenda for much of what constitutes yoga in the centuries that follow. First, it introduces a sort of yogic physiology, calling the body a “fort with eleven gates” and evoking “a person the size of a thumb” who, dwelling within, is worshiped by all the gods (KU 4.12; 5.1, 3). Second, it identifies that individual person within with the universal Person (Puruṣa) or absolute Being (Brahman), asserting that This is what sustains life (KU 5.5, 8–10). Third, it describes the hierarchy of mind-body constituents – the senses, mind, intellect, etc – that comprise the foundational categories of India’s ancient Sāṃkhya philosophy, whose metaphysical system grounds the yoga of the YS, BhG, and other texts and schools (KU 3.10–11; 6.7–8). Because these categories were hierarchically ordered, the realization of higher states of consciousness was, in this early context, tantamount to an ascension through levels of outer space, and so we also find in this and other early Upaniṣads the concept of yoga as a technique for both “inner” and “outer” ascent. These same sources also introduce the use of acoustic spells or formulas (mantras), the most prominent among these being the syllable AUṂ or OṂ , the acoustic form of the supreme brahman. In the following centuries, mantras would become progressively incorporated into yogic theory and practice, in the medieval Tantras, as well as in the Yoga Upaniṣads.
Following this circa third-century BCE watershed, textual references to yoga multiply rapidly in Hindu, Jain, and Buddhist sources, reaching a critical mass some seven hundred to one thousand years later. It was during this initial burst that most of the perennial principles of yoga theory – as well as many elements of yoga practice – were originally formulated. Toward the latter end of this period, one sees the emergence of the earliest yoga systems, in the YS; the third- to fourth-century scriptures of the Buddhist Yogācāra school and fourth- to fifth-century Visuddhimagga of Buddhaghosa; and the Yogadṛṣṭisamuccaya of the eighth-century Jain author Haribhadra. although it may be slightly later than the Yogācāra canon, the YS’s tightly ordered series of aphorisms is so remarkable and comprehensive as to be identified as “classical yoga.” also known as pātañjala yoga (“Patañjalian yoga”) in recognition of its putative compiler Patañjali, it lays out a program of “eight-limbed” (aṣṭāṅga) meditative practice that has been reprised in countless works and teachings, from tenth-century Java, Indonesia to nineteenth-century New York City.
The Yogācāra (“Yoga Practice”) school of Mahāyāna Buddhism was the earliest Buddhist tradition to employ the term yoga to denote its philosophical system. Also known as Vijñānavāda (“Doctrine of Consciousness”), Yogācāra offered a systematic analysis of perception and consciousness together with a set of meditative disciplines designed to eliminate the cognitive errors blocking liberation from suffering existence. Yogācāra’s eight-stage meditative practice itself was not termed yoga, however, but rather “calmness” (śamatha) or “insight” (vipaśyanā) meditation. The Yogācāra analysis of consciousness has many points in common with the more or less coeval YS, and there can be no doubt that cross-pollination occurred across religious boundaries in these matters. The Yogavāsiṣṭha (“Vasiṣṭha’s Teachings on Yoga”) – a circa tenth-century Hindu work from Kashmir that combined analytical and practical teachings on “yoga” with vivid mythological accounts illustrative of its analysis of consciousness – takes positions similar to those of Yogācāra concerning errors of perception and the human inability to distinguish between our flawed apprehension of reality and Reality itself.
The Jains were the last of India’s great religions to employ the term yoga to imply anything remotely resembling “classical” formulations of yoga theory and practice. The earliest Jain uses of the term, found in Umāsvāti’s fourth- to fifth-century Tattvārthasūtra (6.1–2), the earliest extant systematic work of Jain philosophy, defined yoga as “activity of the body, speech, and mind.” as such, yoga was, in early Jain parlance, actually an impediment to liberation. here, yoga could only be overcome through its opposite, ayoga (“non-yoga,” inaction) – that is, through meditation (jhāṇa; dhyāna), asceticism, and other practices of purification to undo the effects of earlier activity. While strongly influenced by the YS, Haribhadra’s circa 750 Yogadṛṣṭisamuccaya, the earliest systematic Jain work on yoga, nonetheless retained much of Umāsvāti’s terminology, even as it referred to observance of the path as yogācāra.
This is not to say that between the fourth century BCE and the second to fourth centuries CE, neither the Buddhists nor the Jains were engaging in practices that we might today identify as yoga. To the contrary, early Buddhist sources like the Majjhima Nikāya – the “Middle-length Sayings” attributed to the Buddha himself – are replete with references to self-mortification and meditation as practiced by the Jains, which the Buddha condemned and contrasted to his own set of four meditations. In the Aṅguttara Nikāya (“Gradual Sayings”), another body of instruction attributed to the Buddha, one finds descriptions of jhāyins (“meditators,” “experientialists”) that closely resemble early Hindu descriptions of practitioners of yoga. Their ascetic practices – never termed yoga in these early sources – were likely innovated within the various itinerant śramana groups that circulated in the eastern Gangetic basin in the latter half of the first millennium BCE.
Even as the term yoga began to appear with increasing frequency between 300 BCE and 400 CE, its meaning was far from fixed. It is only in later centuries that a relatively systematic yoga nomenclature became established among Hindus, Buddhists, and Jains. By the beginning of the fifth century, the basic principles of yoga were more or less in place, with most of what followed being variations on that original core. Here, we would do well to outline these principles, which have persisted through time and across traditions for some two thousand years. They may be summarized as follows:

1. Yoga as an analysis of perception and cognition.

Yoga is an analysis of the dysfunctional nature of everyday perception and cognition, which lies at the root of suffering, the existential conundrum whose solution is the goal of every school of Indian philosophy. Once one comprehends the cause(s) of the problem, one can solve it through philosophical analysis combined with meditative practice.
At bottom, India’s many yoga traditions are soteriologies, doctrines of salvation, concerning the attainment of release from suffering existence and the cycle of rebirths (saṃsāra). The problem of suffering existence and the allied doctrine of cyclic rebirth emerges about five centuries before the beginning of the Common era, in the early Upaniṣads as well as the original teachings of the Jain founder Mahāvıra and the Buddhist founder Gautama Buddha. The same teachings that posit the problem of suffering existence also offer a solution to the problem, which may be summarized by the word “gnosis” (jñāna or prajñā in Sanskrit; paññā in Pali). as such, these are also to be counted among the earliest Indian epistemologies, philosophical theories of what constitutes authentic knowledge. Gnosis – transcendent, immediate, non-conventional knowledge of ultimate Reality, of the reality behind appearances – is the key to salvation in all of these early soteriologies, as well as in India’s leading philosophical schools, many of which emerged in the centuries around the beginning of the Common era. As such, these may be termed gnoseologies, theories of salvation through knowledge, in which to know the truth (i.e., that in spite of appearances, one is, in fact, not trapped in suffering existence) is to realize it in fact. The classic example of such a transformation is that of the Buddha: by realizing the Four noble Truths, he became the “awakened” or “enlightened one” (Buddha), and so was liberated from future rebirths, realizing the definitive extinction of suffering (nibbāna; nirvāṇa) at the end of his life.
In all of these systems, the necessary condition for gnosis is the disengagement of one’s cognitive apparatus from sense impressions and base matter (including the matter of the body). an important distinguishing characteristic of all Indian philosophical systems is the axiom that the mind or mental capacity (manas, citta) is part of the body**: it is the “sixth sense,” which, located in the heart, is tethered to the senses of hearing, seeing, tasting, touching, and smelling, as well as their associated bodily organs.** What this means is that Indian philosophy rejects the mind-body distinction. In doing so, however, it does embrace another distinction. This is the distinction between the mind-body complex on the one hand, and a higher cognitive apparatus – called buddhi (“intellect”), antaḥkaraṇa, vijñāna (both translatable as “consciousness”), etc. – on the other. In these early sources, the term yoga is often used to designate the theory and practice of disengaging the higher cognitive apparatus from the thrall of matter, the body, and the senses (including mind). Yoga is a regimen or discipline that trains the cognitive apparatus to perceive clearly, which leads to true cognition, which in turn leads to salvation, release from suffering existence. Yoga is not the sole term for this type of training, however. In early Buddhist and Jain scriptures as well as many early Hindu sources, the term dhyāna (jhāna in the Pali of early Buddhist teachings, jhāṇa in the ardhamagadhi vernacular of early Jain scripture), most commonly translated as “meditation,” was far more frequently employed. So it is that Hindu sources like the BhG and YS, as well as a number of Buddhist Mahāyāna works, frequently use yoga, dhyāna, and bhāvanā (“cultivation,” “contemplation”) more or less synonymously, while early Jain and Buddhist texts employ the term dhyāna in its various spellings, exclusively. Both the YS and the noble eightfold Path of Buddhism also employ the term samādhi (“concentration”) for the culminating stage of meditation. At this stage, all objects have been removed from consciousness, which thereafter continues to exist in isolation (kaivalyam), forever liberated from all worldly entanglements. Kaivalyam is also employed in Jain soteriology for the final state of the fully purified liberated soul.
The BhG, the philosophical charter of “classical” Hindu theism, uses the term yoga in the broad sense of “discipline” or “path,” and teaches that the paths of gnosis (jñāna-yoga) and action (karma-yoga) are inferior to the path of devotion to an all-powerful and benevolent supreme being (bhakti-yoga). however, here as well, it is the constant training of the cognitive faculties – to meditatively concentrate on god in order to accurately perceive him as the ground of all being and knowledge – that brings about salvation. In this teaching, revealed by none other than the supreme being Kṛṣṇa himself, the devotee whose disciplined meditation is focused on god alone is often referred to as a yogin. The BhG is possibly the first but by no means the last body of teaching to use the term yoga preceded by an adjective or modifier (karma-, jñāna-, bhakti-), thereby acknowledging – but also creating – a variety of yogas.

1. Yoga as the raising and expansion of consciousness.

Through analytical inquiry and meditative practice, the lower organs or apparatus of human cognition are suppressed, allowing for higher, less obstructed levels of perception and cognition to shine forth. here, consciousness raising on a cognitive level is seen to be simultaneous with the “physical” rise of the consciousness or self through ever-higher levels or realms of cosmic space. Reaching the level of consciousness of a god, for example, is tantamount to rising to that deity’s cosmological level, to the atmospheric or heavenly world that deity inhabits. This is a concept that likely flowed from the experience of the Vedic poets, who, by “yoking” their minds to poetic inspiration, were empowered to journey to the farthest reaches of the universe. The physical rise of the dying yoga-yukta chariot warrior to the highest cosmic plane may have also contributed to the formulation of this idea.
Another implication of this concept is the notion that the expansion of consciousness is tantamount to the expansion of the self to the point that one’s body or person becomes coextensive with the entire universe. The 289th chapter of the twelfth book of the Mahābhārata concludes with a description of just such an expansion, and one finds a similar description in the Jain Umāsvāti’s fourth- to fifth century Praśamaratiprakaraṇa. Several Mahāyāna Buddhist sources contain accounts of enlightened beings whose “constructed bodies” (nirmāṇakāya) expand to fill the universe; and the Bhg’s description of the god Krsna’s universal body (viśvarūpa), through which he displays his “masterful yoga,” is of the same order.
Also in this regard, it should be noted that attention to the breath has been a key element of the theory and practice of meditation from the earliest times. Mindfulness of one’s breathing is introduced in such early sources as the Majjhima Nikāya as a fundamental component of Theravāda Buddhist meditation. In early Hindu sources as well, controlling and stilling the breath is a prime technique for calming the mind and turning it inward, away from the distractions of sensory perception . Ātman, the term for the “self ” or “soul” in the classical Upaniṣads and later works, is etymologically linked to the Sanskrit verb *an, “breathe,” and it is via breath channels (nāḍīs) leading up from the heart – channels that merge with the rays of the sun – that the self is released from the body at death to merge with the absolute (brahman) at the summit of the universe (Chāndogya Upaniṣad 8.6.1-6). These descriptions of the breath channels also lie at the origin of yogic or “subtle” body physiology, which would become fleshed out in great detail in India’s medieval tantric scriptures. In these and later works, the breath-propelled self’s rise through the levels of the universe would become completely internalized, with the spinal column doubling as the universal axis mundi, and the practitioner’s own cranial vault becoming the place of the absolute brahman and locus of immortality.

1. Yoga as a path to omniscience.

Once it was established that true perception or true cognition enables a self’s enhanced or enlightened consciousness to rise or expand to reach and penetrate distant regions of space – to see and know things as they truly are beyond the illusory limitations imposed by a deluded mind and sense perceptions – there were no limits to the places to which consciousness could go. These “places” included past and future times, locations distant and hidden, and even places invisible to view. This insight became the foundation for theorizing the type of extrasensory perception known as “yogi perception” (yogipratyakṣa), which is in many Indian epistemological systems the highest of the “true cognitions” (pramāṇas), in other words, the supreme and most irrefutable of all possible sources of knowledge. For the Nyāya-Vaiśeṣika school, the earliest Hindu philosophical school to fully analyze this basis for transcendent knowledge, yogi perception is what permitted the Vedic seers (ṛṣis) to apprehend, in a single panoptical act of perception, the entirety of the Vedic revelation, which was tantamount to viewing the entire universe simultaneously, in all its parts. For the Buddhists, it was this that provided the Buddha and other enlightened beings with the “buddha-eye” or “divine eye,” which granted them of a vision of the true nature of reality. For the early seventh-century Mādhyamika philosopher Candrakīrti, yogi perception afforded direct and profound insight into his school’s highest truth, that is, into the emptiness (śunyatā) of things and concepts, as well as relationships between things and concepts. Yogi perception remained the subject of lively debate among Hindu and Buddhist philosophers well into the medieval period.
It was a widely held precept among ascetic traditions that extrasensory insight into the ultimate nature of reality, a sort of omniscience, could be attained through meditative practice. here, there were two schools of thought concerning the attainment of such insight. The Jains and a number of Hindu and Buddhist schools asserted that the person, self, or consciousness was luminous by nature and innately possessed of perfect perception and insight, and that the path to liberation simply comprised the realization of one’s innate qualities and capacities. Others, including Theravāda and Sarvāstivāda Buddhists, maintained that the path of asceticism and the practice of meditation were necessary to purge cognition of its inborn defilements, and that only once this difficult work had been completed could yogi perception and omniscience arise. In the former case, meditation was the means to realizing the divine within, one’s innate Buddha nature, to see the universe as Self, and so forth. In the latter, the resulting extrasensory insight allowed the ontologically imperfect practitioner to clearly see and truly know a god or Buddha that nonetheless remained Wholly Other. Through such knowledge one could, in the parlance of many of the dualist Hindu tantric schools, “become a god in order to worship god” – but one could never, contra the claims of the non-dualist schools, become God.

1. Yoga as a technique for entering into other bodies, generating multiple bodies, and the attainment of other supernatural accomplishments.

The classical Indian understanding of everyday perception (pratyakṣa) was similar to the extramission theory of the ancient Greeks. In both systems, the site at which visual perception occurs is not the surface of the retina or the junction of the optic nerve with the brain’s visual nuclei, but rather the contours of the perceived object. This means, for example, that when I am viewing a tree, a ray of perception emitted from my eye “con-forms” to the surface of the tree. The ray brings the image of the tree back to my eye, which communicates it to my mind, which in turn communicates it to my inner self or consciousness. In the case of yogi perception, the practice of yoga enhances this process (in some cases, establishing an unmediated connection between consciousness and the perceived object), such that the viewer not only sees things as they truly are, but is also able to directly see through the surface of things into their innermost being. For non-Buddhists, this especially applies to the perception of one’s own inner self as well as the selves or souls – to say nothing of the minds – of others. From here, it is but a short step to conceiving of the viewer possessed of the power of yogi perception – texts often call him a yogi – as possessing the power to physically penetrate, with his enhanced cognitive apparatus intact, into other people’s bodies. This is the theory underlying the tantric practice of “subtle yoga” described at the beginning of this essay. But in fact, the earliest references in all of Indian literature to individuals explicitly called yogis are Mahābhārata tales of Hindu and Buddhist hermits who take over other people’s bodies in just this way; and it is noteworthy that when yogis enter into other people’s bodies, they are said to do so through rays emanating from their eyes. The epic also asserts that a yogi so empowered can take over several thousand bodies simultaneously, and “walk the earth with all of them.” Buddhist sources describe the same phenomenon with the important difference that the enlightened being creates multiple bodies rather than taking over those belonging to other creatures. This is a notion already elaborated in an early Buddhist work, the Sāmaññaphalasutta, a teaching contained in the Dīgha Nikāya (the “Longer Sayings” of the Buddha), according to which a monk who has completed the four Buddhist meditations gains, among other things, the power to self-multiply. Several of the key terms found in this text reappear, with specific reference to yoga and yogis, in the 100 BCE–200 CE ayurvedic classic, the Caraka Saṃhitā.
The ability to enter into and control the bodies of other creatures is but one of the supernatural powers (iddhis in Pali; siddhis or vibhūtis in Sanskrit) that flow from the power of extrasensory perception (abhiññā in Pali; abhijñā in Sanskrit). Others include the power of flight, clairaudience, telepathy, invisibility, and the recollection of past lives – precisely the sorts of powers that the yogis of Indian legend have been said to possess. here, it is helpful to introduce the difference between “yogi practice” and “yoga practice,” which has been implicit to South Asian thought and practice since the beginning of the Common era, the period in which the terms “yogi” and “yogi perception” first appeared in the Indian scriptural record. On the one hand, “yoga practice” essentially denotes a program of mind training and meditation issuing in the realization of enlightenment, liberation, or isolation from the world of suffering existence. Yoga practice is the practical application of the theoretical precepts of the various yogic soteriologies, epistemologies, and gnoseologies presented in analytical works like the YS and the teachings of the various Hindu, Buddhist, and Jain philosophical schools. Yogi practice on the other hand concerns the supernatural powers that empower yogis to take over other creatures’ bodies and so forth. Nearly every one of the earliest narrative descriptions of yogis and their practices underscore the axiom that the penetration of other bodies is the sine qua non of yoga. The cleavage between these two more or less incompatible bodies of theory and practice can be traced back to early Buddhist sources, which speak of a rivalry between meditating “experimentalists” (jhāyins) and “speculatives” (dhammayogas). In medieval Tantra, the same division obtained, this time between practitioners whose meditative practice led to gnosis and identity with the divine on the one hand, and on the other, practitioners – referred to as yogis or sādhakas – whose goal was this-worldly supernatural power in one’s now invulnerable, ageless, and adamantine human body. The gulf between yoga practice and yogi practice never ceased to widen over the centuries, such that, by the time of the British Raj, India’s hordes of yogis were considered by India’s elites to be little more than common criminals, with their fraudulent practices utterly at odds with the “true” science of yoga, which, revealed in the YS, was practiced by none, save perhaps for a handful of isolated hermits living high in the Himalayas. These four sets of concepts and practices form the core and foundational vocabulary of nearly every yoga tradition, school, or system, with all that follow the fourth- to seventh-century watershed – of the YS and various foundational Buddhist and Jain works on meditation and yogi perception – simply variations and expansions on this common core.
[To be continued… Medieval Developments]

Louis II "The Lion" Lacroix - From Soldier, Seargant, General and Later Military Dictator of Marley.
"The Scourge of Eldia"
Birth 722 - Death 834
---
Born in a quaint town near the coast of Odiha within the Nation of Marley in the year 719, Louis throughout his youth was a studious and obedient youth, Often engrossed in historical & philosophical text and thought, He would lead a relatively ordinary life working at his Fathers Orchard until the age of 14. Where during his nightly routine of keeping watch of his family's livelihood he was approached by a group of men belonging to the marleyan military.
Though only one truly stood out, It was a well decorated man of the military with a "Salt & Pepper" Beard, Numerous scars of varying sizes and location and dressed in a uniform befitting of higher ranking Officers.
"You've been workin' hard aye?"
The men of the army offering him the last cigar from the box of them they'd purchased along the way.
"Young man like yourself surely deserve a respite from toil, especially under the schorching sun. Tally-ho!"
He watched the men like a hawk as they left, contemplating his lot in life. Knowing his stubborn father would have to let go of his stingyness and hire a herd of farmboys to do his work for him, It wasn't until the young man of the orchard lay on the canopy of a familiar on his family estate that he wondered what lessons his life would be remembered for.
The very next dawn as he finished his make-shift bindle, filled with a multitude of personal belongings. Ranging from the sweet fruits he's grown to know and love, A Journal and the ancestral familial sword he miraculously taken under the nose of his hawk-eyed father.
He mounts his mare, Stella. An Onyx and Icy blue eyed beauty and rides to Odiha.
---
I don't want to overburden the reader with too much information, but what i've written here barely scratches the surface, If you haven't noticed...I'm indeed expanding upon this Prequel Story I'm writing, There is so much that is still yet to be written and explained events or unfinished plot points that will be finished / explained. ;)

This is a BIG one, I need to vent.
Update on my situation posted almost 4 months ago..... Found out about my bf cheating on me with one person on Thanksgiving and then the huge blow of the second one (more of an emotional connection, huge hit for me) on 12-4, so still very fresh. I have lost my mind I feel like in so many ways, every day I've been fighting triggers, reminders of her, I can't look at the parks, I can't hear names, certain songs, seriously torture.... I have been struggling with nausea and other physical stuff for a bit, but it has gotten significantly worse since all I do is sit in my room and obsess over what he could be doing, who he's talking to, what have I done to make him stray, etc.....
Since DDay, I feel that things have just gotten worse progressively. He's not been willing to hear my pain and it got to the point that I began lacing my statements to him with as much venom as possible to try and hurt him since I am not willing to do to him what he did to me. Not saying my actions are healthy, and, I don't have many IRL friends anymore so I've turned to being quite opportunistic with lacing my words. He can't have a civil conversation with me about how his actions have impacted me, why I cry daily, why I can't ride in his car, why I don't want to waltz with him.... It doesn't even matter so I bottled it up, but the top pops and I have meltdowns. Over these months, the episodes are getting fewer and further between, I'm healing on my own, no support or help from him. I certainly have audacity for asking to return to couples therapy, how dare I ask for more of his time while he has so much going on....
At this point, this past weekend everything has been blown apart. A series of unfortunate events that I can't even begin to process yet, still in shock, but facts are this -we had a major fight Friday night that carried into the next day, which turned into my bf beginning to drink, watching copious amounts of porn, no conversations between us (he was gone with kids all day Saturday), arguing that escalated out of control to the point he spit on me, like did a mini hock and spit in my face (he was screaming at me and his gum fell out of his mouth, so my smart ass started laughing about it, leading to being spit on), then when I react to being spit on, he throws a beer can at the TV, begins packing his stuff despite being drunk, steals my journal and is sitting on the couch reading it, talking shit about what he's reading, my 17y/o son and his friends can hear all of this and confront him (he had been asked to leave for the night numerous times and refused, continued to drink) bf then tells my son to basically stop talking shit to him and get a knife to kill him, asks where his boys are (friends) and another teen comes from the bedroom to back him up, bf has an empty beer bottle in hand and is bowing up on these teens, threatening to beat them up, cops are called, bf wanders outside drunkenly, I locked him outside to wait for cops, he kicks in my front door, cops arrive, and he is tackled and begins fighting with the cop. Gets busted up pretty good, screaming that they're trying to kill him while he's belligerent and fighting them, they drag him off with pants around his thighs, screaming across the entire neighborhood. He is taken to jail with 4 counts of domestic, criminal mischief and resisting, and a no contact order is in place for me and the other 3 vics. Just wow....
To see my son and his friends feel the need to protect me from a human that has said he loves me so much, that really hits so close to home, as this is not my first abusive relationship and my son and I both have triggered trauma with drunk people. After reflecting on the past almost 3 years of our relationship, I have no idea what I'm holding onto other than I greatly fear what revenge tactics he's going to try once it sinks in that this is over, my dignity as a human cannot allow me to return to this. I don't feel like there's ever a good reason for someone who supposedly loves you to spit on you; that crossed a major line, but then threatening my son and his bros with a beer bottle??? Done, this nightmare has to be over now. We have had zero contact since he was arrested, I feel so much safer knowing he can't come around me or my son anymore, and yet there's still a sick feeling to go running back, albeit waaaay less than it was before any other time we've fought. Ihni how I will begin to redefine my life without him, but it has to happen. I've lost respect for myself, I can't look at myself without so much shame and guilt, why have I continued to allow this to run/ruin my life????
I feel like I have tried every healthy and non healthy avenue to support this human and be a decent partner, I'm totally not perfect, and I do try to own my issues and make changes, I do see an individual therapist weekly. I sing to work through tough emotions, I have emotionally numbed out and am starting to see how broken and flawed my thoughts have become. I question every move I make out of fear that I may inadvertently trigger some insecurity issues within him, and honestly it's been nice not walking on eggshells all day deciding what I can say/do that won't piss him off. The struggles he has with addictions, impulsive anger explosions, victim blaming and blame shifting, I'm so confused anymore as to what is healthy and what's not! The bottom line is that we were trauma bonded and the nightmare will never end until the lesson is learned, whatever that may be. I reflect on this obsessively, maybe one day when this has all been finalized I will get myself back into shape and refind myself, but I have learned some seriously hard, embarrassing lessons. I have worked very hard to carve a good professional name for myself, which he has threatened to ruin on numerous occasions, and I have to get myself back into the headspace that actually considers my feelings rather than dismiss them.
If anyone has held on and read this, thank you for your energy, I just needed this outlet. I don't plan to go against the no contact order, I'm allowing the universe to play its hand the way it is supposed to be played. I have been told that I can contact his mother to return a couple of things of his that was left at my house, but that's it. This Saturday would have been 3 years together and it doesn't hurt nearly as bad letting that go as much as it hurts thinking about the selfish pain and degradation I've allowed and contributed to over this amount of time. I will be OK, it will take time, but I have to stand up for my dignity and my son's safety before I destroy that relationship for one that's very toxic and not meeting my emotional needs as a human. I'll always have a place in my heart for this dude, but our time has passed, the role is over, and it's time to move on. There's nothing left in our relationship that feels worth trying anymore energy, which is extremely soul shattering considering I truly wanted to spend my life with this man, but can no longer compete with his addictions, insecurity, and destructive anger. I must heal now, still alone but without the added bitterness and anticipating more drama every weekend or if I see a look in his eyes. I'm more fucked up than I thought I was, it will take time, but I am worth the work. Someone, someday, will see that too and show me the love and respect I do deserve without the need to spit on me, threaten my child, try to ruin my career, call me a pedophile, accusations of everything under the sun in efforts to protect a precious, fragile ego. My only hope at this point is that I can withstand whatever tactics of revenge are going to follow this, but I'll make it either way.
TL;DR - I can no longer compete with insecurity, addiction, and explosive anger. After a brief "good boy" period following DDay, things continue to escalate and my dignity has to win this overall. Reconciliation failed.

This is a collection of oddities, real world inspirations and possible clues that hint to the true purpose of Area Zero and other mysteries in Paldea. My intention was to compile this into one big Theory of Everything, but all of this has been sitting in a Google Doc for a month and a half and I don't see how I can tie it all together with the information we currently have. I figured that I might as well talk about the discoveries I have made because if I had not compiled all of this into a reddit post, it might never have happened. My hope is that it will open up some new discussions about the games, and that someone else may see something that I can not.
​
THE TWO METAL PLATES
Let's start with Area Zero. In the Scarlet/Violet books, the page discussing the strange symbol found in A0 has a few qualities that I have not seen discussed so far. It's titled "Mysterious Plates", plural, and even shows a second plate below the main plate containing the two intersecting triangles. This second plate is strangely never mentioned or shown again anywhere else. It appears to be longer in width and much shorter in height than the one we see in A0, and contains a long string of undecipherable text.
This mysterious second plate is not the only strange thing about this page of the book. The top image is drawn so that the symbol plate has its right side obscured behind rocks, but the bottom image gives you enough of a view to see that it doesn't contain anything to the right of the two zeroes. The map of Paldea and its accompanying text is strangely missing. The drawing is from the side and far away, so the plate is at an angle where it is difficult to make out certain details, but it certainly appears to not be wide enough to contain the mysterious symbol AND the map of Paldea.
That's not all about the metal plate, however. The entire thing, as seen when you yourself go into A0, seems to be based on the concept of a Kilometer Zero location marker. This is something that can be found in many countries across the world, which is why it seemed so strange to me that I have not seen any discussion about this. Regardless, the Kilometer Zero markers are typically placed in locations where multiple roads, railways or other routes of transportation come together in a central location. The marker was popularized by the Roman Empire, which is where the phrase "All roads lead to Rome" originates from. GameFreak makes this connection even clearer by having Hassel say almost that exact same line during one of the Art classes, "All roads lead to Area Zero".
Finally, if you look at the Kilometer Zero marker used in Spain it's clear that GameFreak took inspiration from this specific one for the metal plate of A0. It's located in the center of the country, in Madrid, and has an interesting history. The plaque was removed in 2002 in order for the town square to undergo renovations, and when the plaque was put back the construction crew accidentally put it in the ground upside down, so the north point was facing south and vice versa. This was fixed in 2007, but two years later in 2009 the plaque was removed and a new one was put in. Could this also be the history of the metal plate in A0? While I have yet to think of any implications of this, could it be possible that the A0 plate was found upside down and has been kept that way since Heath's expedition?
​
THE EIGHT TREASURES
GameFreak pulled from numerous parts of Chinese mythology/folklore when putting together Area Zero and the story around Paldea, as the Treasures of Ruin are inspired by the Four Perils and the Kitakami Legends are inspired by Momotaro. Once the DLC was revealed, specifically its logo, I was able to make another similar connection. A not very well known piece of Chinese folklore is that of the Eight Treasures, or the Eight Precious Things, which are eight auspicious symbols that signify good luck and fortune. They had a similar cultural role to the Eight Auspicious Symbols of Buddhism, but beyond that the similarities end.
What the Eight Treasures are exactly varies depending on the source, as the symbols are pulled from the Hundred Treasures of Chinese folklore. The more commonly used Treasures seem to correlate to the eight symbols found on the corners of both the SV logo and the DLC logo. I will point out what I believe to be the Treasure that inspired each symbol, and this is where you can find a more detailed analysis on the Treasure's symbolism.
Starting with the upper left corner of the Scarlet/Violet logo, the Metal Plate inscription is based on the Double Lozenge, representing two hearts joined together to act as one mind. The hexagon in the bottom left is the Jewel, sometimes depicted as a Pearl or Flaming Pearl, containing generative energy and the ability to grant wishes. The four circles in the top right seem to be the Double Coins and the spiral in the bottom right seems to be the Wish Granting Ingot. The symbols in the DLC logo are harder to identify, but I believe the top right is the Mirror Lozenge, the Blueberry academy logo (that looks like an '8') in the bottom left might be inspired by the Coral treasure, and finally the bottom right symbol is the Wish Granting Scepter that is associated with the wish granting ingot. The upper left DLC symbol is too obscure for me to make any direct connections. While I have not drawn any definite conclusions on what these inspirations indicate for the symbols, it certainly seems to indicate the true nature of the Tera jewels and what secret wish-granting powers they may have.
The last thing I'd like to mention about Area Zero is that it seems to be heavily inspired by the Taoist concept of "Grotto Heavens", are worlds believed to exist hidden within the crust of Earth, often times inside the hollow center of a mountain. They are said to receive no actual light from the stars, but rather from "the root of the essence of the sun... its light matches the sun of the outer world". A0, as many have noted, is always lit no matter the time of day.
The mythological locations of Mount Penglai and Mount Kunlun) share some similarities to Area Zero, both of which are believed to be Axis Mundi of the world (a celestial pole, like Yggdrasil from Norse mythology). Mount Penglai is also known as Horai, the name given to the mountain in a short story written by Lafcadio Hearn. It is said to be the home of a cabal of immortals known as the Eight Immortals, although Penglai is found on just one of the mythical islands the Eight Immortals are said to reside on.
Lafcadio Hearn does not share many similarities with what little we know of Heath from the Area Zero Expedition team, but the book Hearn published his many short stories in, including that of Mount Penglai, was titled "Kwaidan". This certainly sounds similar to Koraidon, but I must admit it is a loose connection.
Mount Kunlun, a separate mythical paradise, connects to Paldea through its western/southern river (the direction the river flows from varies) that is known as the "Scarlet RiveWater)". Beyond just the name, in the announcement trailer for Scarlet and Violet there are three globes that can be seen in the room. One is a regular globe of the Earth, one is a regular globe of the Moon, and then the third is a globe depicting the Earth with red colored water instead of blue. If the globes were placed there with thematic intent, I believe the red globe was meant to create the connection between Paldea/A0 and Mount Kunlun. Both Penglai and Kunlun share other similarities to Area Zero through generic paradise tropes that I will not go into here, as the Scarlet RiveRed Globe and Kwaidan/Koraidon felt the most significant and this post is already long enough.
​
THE CARDINAL COLORS
As Scarlet and Violet introduced us to the first open world in the series history, it is understandable that the cardinal directions (North, South, West, East) would receive a bit of attention. What stands out in GameFreaks inclusion of them, however, is the colors associated with each direction.
If you look at what colors different cultures associate with the cardinal directions, you will not find a single society in history that had the same associations as Paldea does. In all my research, I could only find two pieces of cultural or fictional media that shared the same Cardinal Colors. In Buddhism, the Mandala Of Avalokiteshvara (Compassion Buddha) and the Mandala of the Medicine Buddha are sometimes depicted with these Cardinal Colors, but these depictions are not easy to find.
For the second instance, the Land Of Oz from the books by L. Frank Baum see the same setup of Blue/Yellow being opposite one another, red representing the south (which itself is rare enough), with some depictions using purple to represent the North and others using green. This would not seem to connect to Pokemon if not for the fact that the games have actually referenced the Wizard of Oz before. In Generation 1, if the player clicks on the TV in their home the text box indicates that Stand By Me is currently playing, the plot of which seems to have inspired the final act of Pokemon Scarlet and Violet, The Way Home. In the Gen1 remakes, FireRed and LeafGreen, the same reference is made as long as the player chose the male protagonist. Even Sun and Moon included the same Stand By Me reference as well. However, in FLG, a different film is referenced if the player chooses the female protagonist, The Wizard of Oz. Once again I admit this is a flimsy connection, but with one of these two films being an obvious inspiration for the story of Scarlet/Violet, it opens up the possibility that the Wizard of Oz might have also been used as inspiration.
That is all I could find on the inspiration for the choices made for the Cardinal Colors, however certain ways GameFreak utilized the Cardinal Colors of Paldea stood out to me, and I have not seen any discussion on this either. Here are two diagrams demonstrating some ways the Cardinal Colors may have more to do with the Legendary Pokemon of the games than we have realized. Specifically, the shrines encasing the Treasures of Ruin across Paldea are located in the four corners of the region, with their colors being a combination of the Cardinal Colors closest to them. The fire-type Chi-Yu is found in the NorthEast, so its shrine is a combination of blue and green, cyan. This is true of all four of the Treasures of Ruin. If you look at the four new Pokemon introduced in the DLC The Teal Mask, each Pokemon incorporates a Cardinal color in their design, with Ogerpon being the only outlier. Of course, we have barely seen Ogerpon's actual design without the mask, and even then in the image we do have it has a yellow-colored eye which is the only color not utilized by another Pokemon.
Then there is the Mesagoza Type Compass that sits in the center of the city, which has the types arranged in a seemingly random order. I tried to figure out if maybe these Cardinal Colors or the corner colors have something to do with the Type Compass, or the color wheel found in the Art Room, but so far I have had no luck. However the compass is odd in that it has 12 points rather than the 8 points or 16 points typically seen on compass roses, which supposedly is normal of a Japanese Compass Rose but I have yet to find a depiction like this outside of a single DeviantArt image. Beyond the colors, not much else seems relevant to the cardinal directions, although there is one part of A0 that sticks out to me.
While it is difficult to figure out which direction you are looking towards when you enter A0, it is possible to see the Zero Gate above the clouds where you land if you get high up enough along the sides of A0. A link to a screenshot of this is included near the end of the post. Based off of this, it would appear that each river in A0 is coming from a lake located on the cardinal ends of the area. While the North, West, and South rivers all flow down into the bottom of A0, the East river is the one that takes you to the cave with the four circles pointing towards the cardinal directions. This is the only river that does not flow into the crystalline depths below. Given that Part 1 of the DLC seems to take place in the Eastern area connected to Paldea, it makes me wonder if there is any relevance to this river being the only one to not connect with the others.
​
THE LUNAR THEORY
There are a number of strange things throughout the story that seem to connect to the moon, specifically its strange orbit that is scarcely commented on anywhere. While most of the observations in this post are just that, observations, I feel strongly that the moon plays a role in the overall plot of Scarlet and Violet, and will be a focal point of the DLC.
When developing a video game, nothing is particularly easy to implement. The easiest thing to do in game development is doing something again. Taking a feature you have already developed, and copy and pasting it to something else in the game. Knowing this, I would like to discuss the strange behavior of the moon as opposed to the typical behavior of the sun.
Imagine you are standing idly in Paldea while facing the Northeast at night, you watch as the sun rises in the East like it does in the real world. You can watch as it crosses the sky over the course of the day, eventually arriving in the West where it disappears over the horizon. Once the sun has set, you look back over at the Northeast direction expecting to see the moon rise over the horizon. The stars start to appear and the sky darkens, and yet you see no moon. If you were to then look back over at the Northwest direction, if you do so quick enough, you can see the Moon suddenly just appear in the West. Not only that, if you watch it over the course of the night you can see it go from West to East, the opposite direction it would normally travel, and then disappear by fading into the sky as the sun starts to rise once again. The sun has a proper orbit, it rises and sets in the correct locations and arcs across the sky. The moon on the other hand does not rise, it does not set, and it moves across the sky in a straight line. Most may chalk this up to a development bug, but I see an intended behavior. Like I said, once you've implemented something once, here being a circle in the sky rising and setting over the horizon, it's not very difficult to copy and paste it to another giant circle. I believe that this has to have been intentional, especially given that it was not fixed in the latest patch.
That's not all though. Of the four symbols on the Scarlet/Violet logo, one of them seems to lack any sort of context behind its relevance. This would be the bottom right spiral found in the Poco Lab. Even the metal plate inscription has some sort of commentary attributed to it, so that players can at least wonder what its relevance may be. The spiral, however, is left mostly unexplained. That is, if you don't pay attention to the other diagrams on the whiteboard. While the specifics of these equations are a little lost on me, it would seem the two circles found on the Poco Lab whiteboard are depicting calculations relating to the horizon of the Earth, possibly the light refraction of a celestial object. The top diagram appears to either calculate the influence of a satellite on the planets gravity, or a calculation of the true altitude of the satellite. That one could be a number of things, but I believe the bottom one to be a calculation of the true position of the moon based on the principle of the moon illusion. While I can't be certain what the spiral symbol represents, I wonder if it is depicting the strange orbit of the moon that is causing it to appear and disappear in the middle of the sky. Could the "moon's" refraction of light rays) be the relevance of ultraviolet and infrared light wavelengths, which many have theorized to have something to do with Scarlet/Violet?
Based on what we know of the Professor, the last time they left Poco Lab was the final time they set foot outside of Area Zero. These diagrams would have been the last thing they wrote on the whiteboard before going to Zero Lab, where a dozen more strange diagrams can be found on the whiteboards there. If you look at what the diagrams are depicting, each one shows a single circle following a path and/or existing within a strange 3D geometric shape. If I am correct that the Poco Lab whiteboard is the Professor discovering that something is off about the moon's orbit, the whiteboards in Zero Lab might be their attempts at finding out what exactly the orbit is. Could this be why they become more of a hermit, locking themselves in the lab and creating more security protocols to keep other people out? Is it possible they discovered some sort of conspiracy and became the target of those upholding the conspiracy?
​
THE TURTLE THAT CARRIED THE WORLD
While I have already rambled long enough about the suspicious nature of the moon, there's one final observation I would like to make. If you look at the page in the Scarlet/Violet where Heath drew the Disk Pokemon, which we now know is Terapagos, there's still a number of unexplained aspects of the image. The giant disk Terapagos is resting on, the fact that its fur turns into an ocean with ships atop it, the clouds to the left of Terapagos that are completely disconnected from the Pokemon, and the many planets that can be seen in the background. It has already been pointed out that if you flip the image upside down, the black parts of the image actually appear to be crystals encircling the large disk, but there's something else about the image that has yet to be mentioned. The shading of the large disk is strange, familiar even. This image depicts the view of the Earth from the surface of the moon. It is the same exact shading. Looking at the Disk as a large celestial object from the upside down perspective, suddenly makes its appear as if the artist is looking up into the sky, past the Tera crystals of Area Zero, seeing a large object very far away. After all, it's common knowledge that Terapagos might be inspired by the many myths of a World Turtle that carries the Earth on its back. Looking at the drawing upside down, it almost appears as if that were the case here.
Of course, then there's the whole problem with how Area Zero could possibly be on the moon and/or some other satellite object, and then why Earth has the weird hexagonal shapes covering its visible portion. This could always be attributed to simple Human error with the artist not fully comprehending what they were seeing, but that certainly would not be a satisfying answer. Another theory I hope to discuss more of one day is that the clouds seen inside the Great Crater are teleporting anyone who enters to Area Zero, and vice versa, but I'm still working on how exactly that would fit with what we know about A0 and Terapagos so far.
​
LINGBAO DAOISM
One final piece of folklore I'd like to mention is the beliefs of a Daoist school from 400 C.E, known as both the School of the Numinous Treasure and the School of the Sacred Jewel (also known simply as the Lingbao School). While I'm not sure if this actually a source of inspiration for these games, I certainly found some of the aspects and beliefs of this Daoist sect interesting. It's also another piece of spiritual beliefs that have connected to the old Chinese story Journey to the West. This story has had connections to many things I have already talked about, like the Grotto Heavens and Axis Mountains I mentioned earlier. Frankly, anything I found in Chinese mythology that seemed like it might have been inspiration for these games had some sort of connection to that tale, and so as a result it may have been a bigger piece of inspiration that I realized.
Lingbao cosmology is based around the idea of a mountain known as the Jade Capital being the center of the heavens, the Axis Mundi housing the Celestial Worthy (creator god). There are three subsequent deities, the Lord of Celestial Treasure, Lord of Sacred Treasure and the Lord of Divine Treasure. Each deity also resides within its own Grotto Heaven. It was believed by Lingbaoists that time was divided into cosmic cycles, and at the end of each era a deity related to the color associated with that era would descend to Earth provide Humanity a piece of Cosmic teaching. Two types of eras/cycles can occur, one ending with the moon causing a flood that resets the universe, and the other ending in total apocalypse. Before the apocalypse a select few of those who were given the Cosmic teaching, those that actually correctly learned the teaching, would be gathered up by the Queen Mother of the West (A central character of Journey to the West), and taken to a land of bliss not impacted by the apocalypse.
After reading through much of the Journey to the West, I believe that Geeta was inspired by the Queen Mother of the West and plans to take those who follow her to Area Zero when an apocalypse is eventually started, either by her or by natural forces/a Pokemon. This is mostly because I hope that they do something interesting with her character, but partly because it just seems very much like a story GameFreak would tell, especially given the writing of villains in Pokemon games and how recently they have represented big corporate powers.
​
I hope that many of these topics fuel the theorizing parts of your brains, as I know that they have for me. Of course this post is formatted the way it is because I have not been able to come up with a cohesive theory that utilizes all of these oddities, as well as the bullet points below, but maybe one day it will click for someone.
​
(*MANY) ADDITIONAL OBSERVATIONS
- If you get on top of the Academy using the Cyclizar Paradox, you can access the outside of the conservatory-like structure. The Academy exit connected to it is the color red, as well as the door used to enter the treehouse-like structure. As far as I can tell, based off of the intro sequence of Violet I found on YouTube, the doors appear to be red no matter the version. Also, the doors to the conservatory have what might be the second metal plate sitting above it with the text blurred, I imagine intentionally so that anyone like me climbs up to them, we don't discover any secrets.
- The hexagonal symbol in the bottom left of the logo may be depicting the six satellite dishes found around Area Zero, rather than the time machine or the Tera jewel/crystal itself.
- Student IDs are only mentioned two times, both mentions are by the AI Professor. First is when the Professor says the player's ID, 805C393. 805 because that's how many years since the Academy was founded, I presume 'C' is the semester (A is spring, B is summer, C is fall), and 393 because we joined the Academy late in the semester. Penny is 803B121, which tracks with that logic as a year and a half before was when she formed Team Star. Strangely, Nemona is 805C001. This means she registered with the school at the beginning of the current semester, and was the first to do so. This does not line up with what Giacomo says about Nemona taking over Student Council president a year and a half before the events of the game. Also - the previous Director mentions that his assistant tried to coverup the Team Star incident by destroying "digital records", no mention of physical records. We assumed this coverup caused the pages to be ripped out of the Student Registry book found in the Academy Library, but this does not track. Was someone trying to hide Nemona's previous ID? This might explain why the Professor felt it was necessary to create the Pokeball Locking security system, as it has to do with ID numbers. Nemona would be able to use Pokeballs with a new ID, up until the final battle where the AI Professor locks ALL ID's other than their own.
- Zero Gate is not the only thing that can be seen above the clouds in Area Zero. On top of the fact that the ledge it rests on looks nothing like the ledge seen in Paldea, the ridges seen above the Area Zero clouds are a completely different shape than the walls of the Great Create of Paldea, appearing more like a mountain range than a crater. Here some screenshots I took.
- Another reason for why I assume the cardinal directions are the way they are in Area Zero, despite the minimap not functioning from within the area, is because of this promotional artwork GameFreak released prior to Scarlet/Violet hitting the shelves. You can see that to the right of the Zero Gate is a waterfall, and the distance between the two appears to be the same as the distance from where you spawn in Area Zero and the closest waterfall to your left. What's most interesting about this image, though, is that the waterfall depicted in the image is not present in the final game. This would have been the only think linking the Crater above the clouds to the grotto below the clouds, and for whatever reason they decided to remove it in the three months between releasing the image and releasing the games.
- The Kitakami Legends each seem to each have a European heraldic charge) depicted on their design. Given that the Koraidon/Miraidon designs on the front of the Scarlet/Violet books are based on how lions and other animals are depicted in heraldry, this seems like a safe assumption. Okidogi has two crescents#/media/File:BlasonJean_Leliwa(selonGelre).svg) underneath its eyes, and the shape on its chest seems to be the shape of the heraldry shield#/media/File:Swiss_Escutcheon.svg) itself. Munkidori has a maltese cross#/media/File:Maltese_cross.svg) on its stomach. Fezandipiti has a cross moline#/media/File:Cross-Moline-Heraldry.svg) at the end of its tail. Ogerpon is yet another outlier here, just like with the cardinal colors, but one could argue the five pointed star on its chest is its charge, which is called a mullet#/media/File:Blason_de_la_ville_de_Deh%C3%A9ries(59)_Nord-France.svg). Also - on the left side of the top floor of the Entrance Hall you can find a strange shape hanging from a light fixture. It appears to be the water-bouget charge.
- Mount Penglai is the home of the Eight Immortals. The Adventure into Area Zero page in the Scarlet/Violet book depicts seven individuals descending into Area Zero, and we can assume that Heath or whoever illustrated the page was not depicted. Was the Expedition team made up of only eight people? With the prevalence of the number '8' in the games and DLC (Blueberry Academy logo), could this have any significance?
- AI Professor mentions that the energy of the Tera Crystals can "alter the organic functions of living things". The future Paradox Pokemon seem to be actual living Pokemon despite being made of machinery. If "Dream Theory" ends up being partially true, then I wonder if the Tera function that 'created' them (summoned, resurrected, there are many possibilities) possibly healed the Professor by turning them into a cyborg. The research journals suggest the assistant mentioned is the AI Professor, but certain discrepancies in them and the AI Professor's dialogue suggests that is not the case.
- In the Scarlet/Violet book the Director depicted to be shaking Heath's hand has a little piece of hair on his forehead that looks like a crescent moon. The two founders of the Academies depicted by the busts on the top floor of the entrance hall have hair that looks like Grapes and Oranges depending on the version, so theres a precedent for hair shapes of Academy figureheads having double meanings. This is the reachiest reach in this entire post, but I thought I'd include it.
- A pet theory I have had since the release of the games is that Geeta runs a secret society in Paldea that is orchestrating events from the shadows. The compass logo of the Elite Four is reminiscent of an all-seeing-eye, which is largely where this notion came from (The 'eye' portion of the logo is also identical to the marking on Lusamine-Nihilego's legs). If this is truly the case, then I imagine its based on the mythical La Garduna secret society of Spain, which historians are unsure ever actually existed. Secret Societies are also a common trope of Academies and Universities. A real world example that the games may be hinting at with the Paldean Pokemon Gimmighoul is a collegiate secret society at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, called the Order of Gimghoul.
- Every time the Professor summons a Paradox Pokemon from the time machine, the Pokemon falls from the machine in a Master Ball - seemingly just having been caught. In multiple locations within Paldea, including the Player's bedroom and Arven/Penny's dorm rooms, there are scattered boxes with a company logo depicting Tauros. Inside of the Zero Lab, however, the Professor has a large amount of boxes with the Delibird company logo. Most of the settlements in Paldea, like Medali outside of Zero Gate and Levincia where the real estate company is, have warehouses with the Delibird company logo. Is this the company that is providing the Professor with such a large amount of Master Balls? Does this mean that the Delibird company is a subsidiary of Silph Co., or some other Pokeball-manufacturer?
- Penny mentions that Nemona's dad is on the board of the Rotom Phone company. Nemona then mentions how her sister will "take over the family business". Does Nemona's family own a separate corporation from the Rotom Phone company, as 'take over' suggests ownership of the business rather than simply being a part of an executive team. On top of that, we know that the company producing Rotom Phones - or at least the cellphones that the Rotom possesses - is Macro Cosmos, based off of this concept art from Sword and Shield where you can see their logo on the unpossessed phone.
- If you start in the United States and dug a hole straight through the earth, you would end up in China, as the classic saying goes. This is called an "Antipodal Point". The Antipodal point of Madrid, give or take a few dozen miles, is a large isolated mountain in New Zealand with a lake named "Crater Lake" sitting at its peak. If Area Zero's clouds are in fact a portal to multiple locations, and the inscribed symbol was inspired by the Double Lozenge (two hearts joined as one), then could this location in North New Zealand be the other location connected to A0?

November 15th, 2020; reddit. 

Only one thing was ever found after Lucy went missing.She had disappeared the day she went on a hike in white lake forest. I remember that day so clearly, and yet no matter how many times I reread this journal I can’t figure out what happened to her. The state has stopped looking for her and left the case without an answer, just another unanswered missing person’s case I guess, but maybe you guys can figure it out. “Morning mom! I cant wait til I get on the paths. Its supposed to be a really nice day out too! You sure you dont want to come with me?” Lucy texted early in the morning on June 20, 2017. “I am sure I dont want to come with you. Unfortunately Im still sick. Make sure to take pictures for me tho! Anyways Im sure you need to get ready, so I wont keep you. Enjoy your hike today tho, we both know you need this break!” I responded shortly after as I was just waking up. “Awe, still? Hopefully you get better soon! Your immune system has been getting weaker, you should really go to the hospital to get it checked out! I’ll make sure to send plenty of photos thouh, I promise!” Lucy replied as I got up to go to the bathroom. She had sent me ten photos from 10:30am to 1pm. The first one was of a fox peering out of a hole underneath a dead tree, the second one helped the rescue team identify the trail she had taken, the fifth was one of her with a doe and its fawn in the background. The photo of her had her wearing a cyan tee-shirt with a black backpack on her back and her brown hair up in a ponytail as her green eyes reflected the forest. Those photos were the only ones that were found useful in finding her. It was a year later that the police had given me the journal after recording everything written in it. She started writing in it the night before she went on that hike. Her first entry was titled June 19, 2017; I can’t wait! After weeks on end of working every day of the week I finally was able to catch a break, so I have made plans to drive out to white lake forest and go for a hike. I’ll be stoping by panera for breakfast on my way. I just have to remember to pack a lunch, some snacks, water, a portable charger, a pen, and this jornal. I have checked the weather and it’s looking like it will be a perfect day for a hike. Hopefully my mom has gotten better so that way she can join me! Honestly after everything with my ex I could really use a day to relax and just enjoy myself. She had recently broken up with her abusive (ex) boyfriend, and he hadn’t stopped bothering her until she got a restraining order. That had been just a few days before she went on that hike. After all that overworking herself as well as the stress of dealing with an abusive ex who wouldn’t leave her alone she really needed a day to relax. If only she had returned home that day. I really miss my baby girl. The next entry in her journal is labled June 21, 2017; Something is wrong. I should have been home by now, but I think I took a wrong turn at some point. I just began to get this feeling of being watched, so I stopped taking pictures and started looking around a lot more without really paying attention to my surroundings. As the sun set over the horizon I was out of food and my water was almost out. Once the sun was down and it grew dark I pulled out my phone for the flashlight. I ended up having to call it a night when my phone died. I slept at the base of a tree last night and when I woke up I drank the last of my water. It tasted a bit funny though, but that might just be me. Anyways I better start moving before I spend the whole day here. I think I see an area I recognize, so that will be the direction I head. It’s the old cabin that is overrun by foliage with a caved in roof. The next page is the last entry, and it is the most worrying one. June 21, 2017; I needhelp if only my phone weren’t dead. I didn’t realize the portable charger was dead. If I hadI would have charged it the night before I’m getting dizzy, so Ihad to stop and take a break.Im currently siting on the porch on theold cabin. I think I hear some The entry cuts off there. The jornal had apparently been found in an overgrown bush in front of an old cabin, though none of her other belongings were ever found. I still wonder what ever happened to her that day, and hope that maybe she is doing well today. I am not sure if you came to this hoping to read a story with a happy ending, but unfortunately this isn’t a fantasy and in real life not all stories have a true ending.
December 20, 2020; reddit
Edit: Wow, I didn’t realize this post would blow up this much. Anyways, many of you have asked some questions regarding more information on the case. To start with, “Who all knew where she was going to be that day?” Well, to my knowledge she only told me, her siblings, and her close friends because she was inviting us to go with her, though I couldn’t tell you if anyone else knew because I’m not sure if anyone else was told by her siblings or friends. Another question that was asked often was “Does any of her friends or family have a close connection to her ex-boyfriend?” While I wouldn’t call this a close connection I do know one of her friends has a brother who is dating the ex-boyfriend’s brother. I have met his family and they are all good people especially his parents, so not only am I not sure where he got the way he treats his partners but I am sure his family wouldn’t let him do anything to Lucy. The last question I will answer is “Is there any way someone could have drugged the water she had left in the water bottle?” I wouldn’t think so due to her being a light sleeper, but that doesn’t mean it is impossible for someone to have drugged her water. Thinking about it though if that were the case then they would have been close enough to her to take her then, so the fact that they didn’t does strike me as odd. Thank you all for your kindness by the way, I really appreciate it.

Hello,
I never spoke about this to anyone else except my wife, and it's a bit hard to put things into the right order and perspective, so please bear with me. What follows is a long bit of context for the dream posted at the very end of this post. Feel free to skip this context if you want an un-biased reading of the dream.
When I was 16 I had a very vivid dream where I think I might have met my Anima. Then I had the same exact dream when I was 18. When I was 16 I was dealing with depression, contemplated suicide, had a very very low self esteem and I didn't see a way out. I had very deep issues and fights with my mother.
The shocking thing to me is that this was the first dream that I could ever recall. Before this, I probably dreamt as it's only natural, but I never remembered them as I was and am a very heavy sleeper. Then, one night, I had this totally amazing, colourful, movie-like dream that I couldn't make heads or tails of and it shocked me to my core (see at the very end for the contents of the dream).
By the time I was 18 I started looking into philosophy, started reading more about psychology and the occult space, getting interested in Astrology, Tarot, Magick, Alchemy and metaphysics in general.
In my early 20s I started playing with my imagination and started having visions, trying to grapple with various philosophical issues, but also with paradoxes, or the irrational. I kept a journal of most of the visions and thought processes. As I look back, most of imaginative work seemed to revolve around alchemical processes, trying to integrate "something" that I couldn't properly define at that time. Gradually, I felt like there was an "other me" inside of me, that I wasn't conscious of, that was guiding me through these visions, as if guiding my hand through the blue print of a maze, showing me the way towards the exit, or the right path of life towards integration. (Was this an incipient form of the Spirit of the Depths?)
Unfortunately, I wasn't aware of Jung's main body of work or concepts, so I fumbled a lot in the dark, and only gradually I became aware that there was something missing from my self, and started striving for "wholeness", which I then tried to define through various ways and philosophical or metaphysical concepts.
Those early visions changed my outlook on life in a positive way and I got a lot of healing out of them, but they turned into a personal worldview that conflicted with my original worldview as an orthodox Christian. I am still conflicted to this day, while I am in the process of supplanting my original worldview with the new one, which is more neo-platonic in flavour, and still under development.
In my mid 20's to early 30's I even did Astrology and Tarot readings as a rational, die-hard sceptic. I treated it as an experiment, in an effort to better understand Fate and Free Will, and to see the thought processes behind what I thought what was irrational thinking. I was very serious about it, and studied extensively, starting with the general premise that Astrology theory is true, selecting Hellenistic Astrology as study material (as it was more ancient based on Fate models, compared to more modern Psychological/Sun-sign astrology). In terms of the Soul and Fate, I also think the Ancients did it better.
I also did Talismanic work, whish was a lot of fun. Following medieval practices in Electional Astrology to find the right time to construct a talisman out of silver and/or various stones and herbs, dressing up appropriately, then holding a ritual to inscribe a piece of silver or a precious stone with various magical symbols. I felt like one of those medieval wizards with long beards and pointy hats. (literal identification with the Magician's Persona?).
Surprisingly, I did perceive very positive effects from the talismans that I made (mainly Jupiter ones, as Jupiter is dignified in my chart). I am still confused about this.
I any case, I am 36 now, and no longer practice any occult work due to a number of reasons related to work, kids etc., but one of the main ones is that a few years back I had a crisis due to me ending up identifying too much with what I now see as the Magician Persona (also referenced above), and that lead me to a dangerous path (messianic/god complex) that could have ended my marriage. Luckily, with help and support from my wife, I was able to disengage from that persona and get back on track towards the centre. I took ten steps back from all the self work I was doing before then, to reflect on my self, my values and my outlook on life.
I still play with Astrology and Tarot from time to time, for personal use, but I no longer to readings. I also had a full time corporate job throughout all of this. Also in a relationship for 18 years, and with two kids.
For a couple of years after the crisis event, I was in a kind of auto-pilot mode, recovering from all the years of agonizing questions and soul searching, chasing after metaphysical ideals, and just chilling, reading some light literature, gaming, netflix or simply lazing around and spending time with my family.
In my current 36th year of life, I finally found the courage to start reading Jung's Red Book (I've had it for years but didn't feel right to read it, for some reason) and it is already stirring things up in me again. In Jung's dialogue with his Soul I recognize the tone of the visions I had as a youth and it both scares and excites me. Although in the more recent years I became aware of Jung's work and main concepts when trying to interpret this dream, I didn't really start a formal study of it. I always wanted to read Jung's work, but couldn't find the motivation to do it, or maybe I just wasn't ready for it.
Either way, I have just started with the Red Book and I am startled by the similarities. In some ways, it feels like I followed in Jung's path, but a different one.
Looking back at this first dream, my most significant one, could it be that the little girl that helped me with the key might actually be my Anima? If she is, why did she help me? What is the meaning of the dream? Why did my mother sell the card at the end?
I did in fact have a LOT of issues with my mother as I was growing up, and she was a main contributor to my depression, anxiety and low self esteem in my teenage years. After I started delving into my unconscious (is that what I did?) and grappling with the contents that surfaced in my visions (was this an incipient form of active imagination?) I was able to gradually understand these issues and face my mother. After that, I was able to grow out of her shadow and be my own man.
I am now mostly healed from my early traumas and I am able to function properly in society, have a loving family, good work and good prospects for the future. I am also curious to see the 2nd part of this journey, as this is where Jung says that there is a mental transformation in individuals, where they are more focused on the soul.
Sorry for the long post, but I would love to hear your thoughts on all this. Also, here is the dream:
​

The dream starts in a cinematic kind of way, with the sun throwing its first rays over some factories in an industrial area, similar to America in the 1930s. There's not a single person around. The bricks of the buildings emit a kind of warmth when they reflect the sun light, and the the scene moves to me, standing in front of a house that rises defiantly in the middle of the empty buildings. I stand and contemplate in the garden in front of the building, surrounded by a fence made of blood-colored wood. After a while I no longer perceive anything around me, yet I feel an inexplicable and yet perfectly justifiable desire.
Suddenly, I feel the need to undress myself. I take off my scruffy cap, unbutton my coat and throw it aside. I take off my shoes and socks, so that I am only in my white shirt and grey pants. Under my feet, I feel the freshness of the dew and try to guess its taste.
The house in front of me seems very strange. From any angle I look at it, it has a pyramidal shape, although the space of the upper rooms does not seem to diminish. The architecture of the house seems otherwordly, but I find it unique and I am curious about it.
After a while, during which I fall into philosophical considerations about the proportions of the building, I decide to climb it. I don't understand why I feel I must do this, as opposed to entering through the door, but deep in my soul I know it must be so. However, at the same time, I know that what I am doing is somehow like a violation of a sacred, divine law, but I still feel that what I am doing is right. With youthful agility, I jump and grab onto the beam of the first floor.
I am very confident in climbing the floors with an uncommon ease and agility. I keep climbing, ignoring the number of floors. At some point I stop.
I am on the second to last floor and notice that the sun's rays around me are truly sublime. At the same time, I realize that I can't climb anymore. The door to the last room at the top is locked, and I don't have the key. It hadn't occurred to me whether the other rooms were locked or not. I had noticed the windows of the other rooms on the other floors in passing, but I refrained from looking inside, or didn't feel the need to look inside.
I liked the windows, though. They were all engraved with great attention to detail, and from a few fleeting glances, I was able to decipher scenes from various mythic battles and characters that I had read about.
While I was lost in thought, I didn't notice that a girl had sneaked up behind me. She was the housemaid who took care of the house while the owners were out. I turn to look at her, but in a very strange way, I could not distinguish her facial features, almost like she didn't have a face. I felt, instead, that the girl carries a deep love for me in her heart. She then takes my timid hand in hers and leaves a key in my palm. Deep down, I know she is risking a lot with this gesture, so I look into her warm soul and thank her from the bottom of my heart. The girl retreats quickly behind a door made of solid wood, on which I casually observed that it was inlaid with many suns around a sphere, or a central sun.
I regretted that I couldn't discern her facial features, and for not sharing her love. However, I knew that I had another purpose for being there. I looked at the key in my hand. It seemed to be made of thin threads of gold, intertwining and interweaving in a delicate pattern, and it was light as a feather. I asked myself what would one normally have to do to obtain this key in the regular way, feeling that I got off easy not having to go through all the floors. I thanked the faceless girl again in my mind for the key that looked like a sunbeam and stood up. With one final effortless leap, I reached the top floor.
Here I found a room that didn't seem very spacious from the outside, but once the key turned in the lock... I felt as if I had entered another plane of existence, like I was sucked inside and transported to somewhere else. Inside, the room defied the laws of physics. Sunbeams seemed to penetrate through all the windows. But what I saw in the room surpassed anything I could ever imagine. First of all, I noticed the chandelier was just suspended in the air, floating. Its arms seemed to be made of water, but that water emitted a kind of luminous pulsation with a slight blue tint. Then my attention was drawn to the countless works of art that surrounded me: paintings, sculptures, furniture, mosaics, and many others. But what impressed me the most, apart from the unparalleled mastery with which they were created, was the way each piece completed a grand, divine mosaic. I had the impression that if I moved one of them, the mosaic would have collapsed. The inlays on the various cabinets completed scenes from certain paintings, and the characters unfolded on pedestals. It was a sight that left me speechless, and I had the impression that everything came to life, one by one, and continued a neverending story.
After a while, I woke up as if from a deep and eternal sleep. I realized that all those sensations had overwhelmed me for a moment. I gently pushed aside the almost imperceptible silk covering the bed and stood up. Everything was just as beautiful and harmonious. But now I knew why I had come here. I knew I was looking for something specific, something precious, a treasure of the universe, a treasure of the soul. I began to search carefully so as not to disturb the almost sacred order of the works of art around me.
At some point I discovered a huge library that extended to infinity, and stopped thinking about how such a thing was possible. I remember running my fingers slowly over the book titles, and seeing that they were written in many languages, ancient languages I didn't know, and I suspected they hid many of the secrets of the universe. The shelves and cabinet drawers also hid many strange objects, made of different materials and shapes. As I searched more and more, even though I didn't know what I was looking for, I felt that I was getting closer.
Also, I had noticed for some time that the things around me were somehow silently moving, but I didn't pay much attention to it, because everything seemed to move at once, maintaining the harmony and beauty. After a while, my gaze fell almost intuitively on a small white cabinet delicately carved from a single block of material.
I approached it slowly and carefully, and as soon as I touched it, my entire being became intoxicated with a mesmerizing fragrance. I then suddenly realize that the fragrance had been present in the room all along, but I only became aware of it when I touched the small cabinet. I liked this realization for some reason and I was sure that what I was looking for was in that small and delicate chest.
I carefully grasp the golden handles and start opening the drawers, curiously analyzing the contents of each one. At the same time, I could appreciate wholeheartedly the love with which all the details on each handle were engraved, and I tried to decipher the various mysterious inscriptions that attracted my gaze, and rejoiced within myself. In such a moment, my trembling fingers reach into the back of a drawer and carefully grasp the object I was looking for, and bring it to light.
It was a long and thin card, similar to those in Tarot, but made of gold and extremely fine. What struck me the most were the inscriptions on the faces of the card. On each of the faces, various hieroglyphs, symbols, and signs were engraved in relief.
Some of them seemed to be Egyptian, but the majority were completely unknown to me. They seemed to be handwritten, but in a fascinatingly meticulous way. As I looked upon each symbol, I felt a great inner tension. Not pain, but desire. The desire to decipher the message embedded in the card. I turned it over and saw other hieroglyphs and symbols on the back, but once I turned it over a second time, the symbols changed… other symbols appeared, just as beautiful and mysterious. It was incomprehensible and wonderful.
After a while I had lost track of time, so I decide it's time to leave. I take a final look at the wonders around me and then I carefully put the card in the inside of my shirt, close to my skin, and walk out the door. I close it slowly and leave the key in the lock. I run my hand over my chest, reassuring myself that the treasure is still there, and start to descend the pyramid with the same ease as I climbed it. I feel at ease and happy.
After I climb down, I stop for a moment and look in the direction of the sun. I cannot tell if it is rising or setting, and then the vision ends with me heading towards the sun and disappearing into the distance as I am skipping over some train tracks.
End of Part 1. Here comes part two of the dream:
After I crossed those train tracks, in the sunset, the image moves to another setting, in our modern times. I was with my mother and we were looking for a jeweler. I was very sad, almost grieving, because my mother wanted to sell the tablet, since we were very poor and we needed the money.
I tried to explain to her the meaning of the symbols, but she didn't understand. I felt like I was losing something very important and I hadn't had a chance to decipher what was written on it. I was so depressed that it was hard for me to even walk.
We found a jeweler, my mother took the tablet out of her bag and handed it to him. The man had no idea of its importance, but I did, and I felt like the ground was slipping from under my feet. I wanted to do something, to take it and run, but I couldn't. I could only think about how I would get it back. The jeweler weighed it unimpressed by its symbols, and paid my mother a paltry sum of money. I would have given my life to be able to understand its mysteries.
After the deal was done, I was left alone and grieving and I could only think about how I would get it back. I didn't know how, but I knew that I would get it back.

First Entry
Second Entry
Third Entry
Fourth Entry ​
Fifth Entry
​
Journal of Camille Lambert - April 12th
​
We could see the shadows of the Nightwalkers from our place by the bonfire. They peeked in through the broken windows of the church, watching us from afar but never actually entering the ruins. I’m not sure if the firelight was what kept them away, or the protective runes that Nina had drawn.
​
Nina sat on a fallen column, watching them in case they tried anything… and yet if I walked over to the right side of the circle of columns that we’d set up our bonfire in, she seemed… dimmer. Like she was there and yet not there at the same time.
​
Dom on the other hand was crystal clear. I could see him sitting by the door of the church. I couldn’t see him at all from the left side of the circle. The mist was too thick. But on the right side, he was right there, impossible to miss. The effect was surreal, to say the least. He was holding the device Nina had used to call in her backup. She’d called it a phone but it didn’t look like any phone I’d ever seen.
​
“ETA, an hour or so for the standby team in Tallinn, 15 hours for the rest,” Nina had said after she’d made her call. “Let’s get comfortable.”
I figured that it’d been about an hour and a half since she’d said that. Standing by the bonfire itself, the world past the columns seemed to be in flux. Sometimes I could see mist through the windows and the holes in the ceiling. Sometimes I could see stars.
​
Shadows of smaller Nightwalkers darted past the church door sometimes, lingering only long enough to look in on us before retreating back into the darkness. Nina watched each one like a hawk, gripping her shotgun tightly.
I walked out to sit with her for a bit, leaving the light of the fire for a little while. Even from her vantage point, I still couldn’t see Dom but at least I knew he was safe enough.
“How many do you think are out there?” I asked quietly.
“Too many,” Nina replied. “We’re not going back to Puriysk tonight, that’s for damn sure.”
​
As she spoke, I saw more shadows moving in the dark, skittering away into the mist.
“You sure you want to stay out here? Might be safer to stay with Dom,” I said.
“Probably, but it’s better if I stay here. If the door closes, I’m better off on the inside. Be easier to open it again, that way.”
“Fair enough,” I said, looking back out into the mist. I could see nothing past it.
​
No shadows. No movement. There wasn’t even any noise. Nina looked up at the darkness again.
“Is it just me or is it quieter out there?” She asked.
“No… it’s quieter out there,” I said. “Could be there’s a big one nearby. Dom said that the small ones usually avoid them.”
​
Nina kept staring out at the mist, but the silence remained. I wasn’t sure if she was genuinely worried or not. After a few minutes, I saw movement in the mist again. I heard the rustling of trees and saw something standing in the dark. I almost thought that it might have looked like a man… almost. But I couldn’t fully make out the shape of it.
​
I could see the eyes of the Nightwalker shining in the firelight, before it finally moved, darting out of sight. Nina watched it go, before returning her attention to me.
“Good news is, we won’t be alone for that much longer,” She said. “After the first group shows up, we can head into Puriysk with them and start setting up shop. By the time the rest of them arrive, we should be in a good place. After that, it’s just a matter of getting people out and dealing with Calhoun,”
“You make it sound easy,” I said.
“I mean, it probably won’t be a walk in the park,” Nina admitted. “But at least we won’t be running this job alone. These things go easier when you’ve got help.”
“Yeah… I imagine they would,” I said.
​
Beside us, I heard a dull thud as a piece of one of the church's more damaged walls fell away and crashed to the ground. Nina was up on her feet immediately, shotgun in hand. I rose to my feet beside her.
“The fuck was that?” She asked.
“Part of the wall, I think,” I said. I spotted the spot where it had fallen and looked up. It had probably come off one of the broken domed towers near the door. One of their ceilings had come down ages ago and I imagined it wouldn’t take much more than a strong gust of wind to knock over some of the loose bricks jutting out from where the roof remained. Nina approached the fallen piece of brick, pausing to inspect it.
​
“Hell of a big chunk of wall,” She said before looking up again. I did the same, although as I did, I could’ve sworn I saw movement out of the corner of my eye. I looked over at it. The shadows cast by the bonfire left pools of darkness along the ceiling.
​
But in those pools, I could see flickering reflections of light.
​
Two of them.
​
Staring right at me.
​
Slowly I reached out, putting a hand on Nina’s shoulder. I didn’t want to yell or move too quickly. I couldn’t see what was in the darkness but I know that it looked poised to strike. Nina looked over at me, before tensing up. I knew that she saw it too. The eyes remained trained on us, and I heard a low, animal hiss coming from the shadows.
“Bonfire…” Nina said, gripping her shotgun tighter “Get Dom… now.”
​
I took a step back and saw the eyes following me. Nina backed away from the shadows, eyes never leaving the ceiling. I saw limbs splaying outward from the darkness. I could see them tensing up. It was going to lunge.
​
“MOVE!” I said, breaking into a sprint, but it was too late. The Nightwalker launched itself at Nina like a bullet. I heard her shotgun fire twice, before the creature crashed into the ground, flailing violently. I could see long, dark limbs, more than any human should have struggling to pick itself up. I could see a body that only vaguely resembled a man. It had a torso, a human head, and long black hair, but looked more like a spider than a person. And yet there was something off about it. Something I hadn’t seen on any of the other Nightwalkers. This one had some kind of sigil on its forehead. Something that looked almost like a crimson eye, that seemed to glow with surreal energy.
​
The Nightwalker looked at Nina, snarling at her. When it opened its mouth, I could see rows upon rows of teeth inside. She fired her shotgun again, but the creature barely even seemed to notice them. Even after she’d gone through the trouble of cursing them, her rounds weren’t doing anything.
“RUN!” I heard her yell, and I didn’t dare question that. I just ran.
​
I sprinted toward the bonfire, just in time to see Dom running toward me. He took aim at the Nightwalker, firing at it as it tried to go after Nina. But his bullets did next to nothing to it. The Nightwalker didn’t even look at him.
​
It just kept going for Nina, almost pinning her down. She unloaded two more shells into its face, which did little more than make it flinch and bought her some time to run.
​
This time, she took off at a sprint toward the bonfire. Dom saw her running and started to backpedal as well, running back toward the bonfire and the safety of the columns. The creature paused as we took shelter by the fire, watching us intently and letting out another serpentine hiss. Nina stared back at it, before looking back at the fire. She tossed her shotgun aside and hastily grabbed one of the spare branches we’d kept for the bonfire. She put it in the fire, before pulling it out and brandishing it like a weapon. The Nightwalker hissed and recoiled a bit, focused on the flame. As it paused, Dom grabbed Nina’s shotgun off the ground and took aim.
​
“Don’t…” She said, putting a hand up to stop him, her voice low and intense. She didn’t dare look away from the Nightwalker. “Save the cursed rounds… they won’t kill it. Just get outside.”
“What about you?” Dom asked.
“Outside,” Nina repeated. “Now.”
I put a hand on Dom’s shoulder.
“Let’s go!” I said, trying to tug him along behind me.
​
He hesitated for a moment longer before finally letting me take him. We backed through the right set of columns, and once we were through I saw Nina taking a step away from the bonfire, toward the right set of columns. The Nightwalker passed the left set of columns, trying to follow her.
“Come on…” She said under her breath, “Come and get me, shithead…”
​
I saw it inching closer to her, and tensing up again, getting ready to pounce. That was when Nina made her move. She thrust her burning branch into the Nightwalker's face, earning a cry of pain from it and making it jerk back. I saw it swatting at the branch, trying to get rid of the fire. Nina took the chance to run, sprinting at top speed toward the door of the church.
“GO!”
​
Neither of us needed to be told twice. We ran for the church door, as the Nightwalker let out a roar from behind us. I looked back to see it charging toward us again, gaining ground. As we ran back out into the field, we were greeted by countless blinding lights. I saw Nina pause, before feeling her grab me by the back of the shirt and pull me away. I could see Dom in her other hand. She dragged us both down to the ground in the instant before the Nightwalker emerged from the door of the church.
​
I saw it recoil, putting up its clawed hands to try and shield its eyes from the blinding light.
​
Then I heard the gunfire.
​
As my eyes adjusted to the light, I could see several men, each holding automatic rifles advancing on the Nightwalker. It shrank back toward the church, trying to shield itself from the gunfire, clearly overwhelmed. But just like with Nina’s shotgun before it, the bullets did little to harm it. Despite all the gunfire it took, it didn’t fall. I could hear it hissing, I could see its beady black eyes darting around wildly. It lunged forward again, tackling one of the nearby men and tearing into him, before going after another. I saw its jaws close around his skull and heard the sickening crunch of bone as it took his head. The other men scrambled back, trying to put as much distance between themselves and the Nightwalker as they could. It howled in rage, preparing to charge after them when a final, deafening gunshot echoed through the night.
​
This time, the Nightwalker's entire body seized up. It let out an agonized scream. I could see its clawed hands clutching at a wound that had appeared on its chest… and I could see smoke rising out of that wound. It kept screaming and thrashing violently. Its limbs gave out from underneath it. I could see the wound in its chest sizzling and burning. I saw the flesh and skin sloughing off of its body, and I could see the pale white bone underneath.
​
The eye sigil on its forehead flickered before fading away and the Nightwalker let out one final, howl before collapsing to the ground, its body still twitching and convulsing. I looked over to see a single woman standing calmly by the nearby trucks. She was tall and pale, with long, stringy black hair and an intense look in her eye.
​
She was dressed in a long beige coat and holding an ornate revolver in one gloved hand. As the Nightwalker died I saw her gingerly slip the pistol into the inner pocket of her coat before reaching into another pocket for a notebook. Without ever looking away from the dead Nightwalker, she scribbled something down, then pocketed the notebook again and calmly walked toward the church, not even pausing to acknowledge anyone else around her. As she left, I saw the other armed men tending to their dead. With the Nightwalker dead, I could get a better look at them now. They were dressed like soldiers, with bulletproof vests and no shortage of pockets. A few of them wore netted veils over their faces, making it hard to get a good look at them and giving them an eerie appearance, although watching them examine the bodies of their dead and respectfully carrying them away was almost humanizing.
​
Nina sat up, her blonde hair messy and a somewhat disoriented look on her face. She looked over toward the source of the lights that had blinded us. Four large SUVs were parked outside of the church, their headlights shining on the door. From those SUVs, I could see more armed men getting out and one of them was coming toward us.
​
“Nina Valentine?” I heard him ask. He had a heavy Slavic accent.
“Still alive,” She said, as she slowly climbed to her feet.
“Good. I’m Olev Kallas, I’m from the Tallinn Office, Director Durand sends his regards,” He offered Nina a hand to shake and she reluctantly took it. “The Director is currently en route, as are the rest of the team. In the meanwhile, we’re here to help.”
“Yeah and right on fucking time too,” She said, looking over at the dead Nightwalker.
​
“Ah… yes, you can thank Dr. Di Cesare for that,” Kallas said.
Nina raised an eyebrow. I had a feeling that she recognized the name, but she didn’t comment on it.
“But first, I imagine you and your friends must need a hot meal and a cold drink right about now and I can get you both.”
“Oh you’ve got no fucking idea…” Nina said, as Dom helped me to my feet. She waited until we were up, before gesturing for us to follow as Kallas led us toward one of the SUV’s.
​
***
​
I barely recognized the empty field around us as Puriysk. The buildings were all long gone and in their place was a paved highway that I’d never seen before.
“The town’s been gone for as long as I can remember,” Kallas said. “I couldn’t tell you if it was us, or the Soviets who got rid of the ruins. I read somewhere that there was some talk about refurbishing the old Church, but as you see, nothing ever came of it.”
“Thank God for small miracles,” Nina said, “Made my job a hell of a lot easier.”
​
We drove down the highway, past the wide open landscape and as we drove, I couldn’t help but admire it. In the distance, I could see the lights from another nearby town and watched as they drew closer and closer. God, I’d never seen a place so full of life before. As we drove along the quiet streets, past the sleeping buildings in the early hours of the morning, they still seemed so alive. Street lights cast a warm glow on the few passersby out doing their business. There were more cars on the road than I’d ever seen before, some driving past us to their own destinations and others parked and still.
​
“I can drop you three off at a hotel if you’d like,” Kallas offered. “You can get cleaned up and have a short rest before Director Durand arrives. I can pick up some fresh clothes for you, and then we can have a debrief over dinner.”
“Yeah, works for me,” Nina said before looking over at us.
“Dinner sounds good,” I said, although at the time I had no idea what exactly a hotel was. Thankfully, I got my answer pretty quickly.
​
The room I got was comfortable. The bed was softer than anything I’d ever laid on before and the hot water… oh God… I spent almost an hour in the shower alone, enjoying the steam and feeling the tension drain out of my muscles. When I was done, I put on a soft, fluffy bathrobe and laid down, letting myself relax for the first time in days. I almost dozed off… and maybe I would have if I hadn’t heard a knock on my door.
​
I considered ignoring it and just letting sleep take me, but I figured I might as well make sure it wasn’t important. Tying my bathrobe a little tighter around me, I got up to answer the door and was greeted by Dom, still wet from the shower.
​
“Hey,” He said. “Sorry, I hope I’m not bothering you!”
“It’s fine!” I replied, putting on a smile, “Come on in.”
I opened the door all the way to let him inside, but he hesitated.
“No, it’s alright. I just thought I’d check on you. It’s been… well, it’s been one hell of a past few days. And this feels like the first chance we’ve had to really breathe in a while.”
“Yeah, no kidding,” I sighed. I still held the door open for him. “Well, we’re not going to have this conversation in the hall, so come on in. I’ve got a coffee machine in here and I’m dying to try it out.”
​
I’m not sure if it was the promise of coffee that made him accept my invitation or the realization that I probably didn’t want to be in the hall with just a bathrobe on, but he came inside anyway.I went to the coffee machine and tried to figure it out. They had these little cups that I’d never seen before, but otherwise, it seemed fairly straightforward.
​
“Man… it’s really something else out here, isn’t it?” Dom asked, going to sit down on the bed. “It’s just so bright out here!”
“I’m still not entirely convinced I’m not dreaming,” I admitted. I managed to get one of the cups into the coffee machine and watched as it pissed out a somewhat pathetic amount of scalding hot coffee that admittedly did smell very nice. It had a lovely vanilla aroma.
I brought the first cup over to Dom.
​
“Glad I’m not the only one,” He said as I went back to make another cup, “Honestly, I wasn’t even sure if Nina’s backup was even going to come through and I sure as hell didn’t expect any of this.”
“You and me both,” I said with a sigh, “Is it wrong to say that I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop?”
“Well, when something seems too good to be true…” Dom murmured, “Although then again… looking at what we had in there compared to what Nina’s been telling me about life out here, I can’t help but wonder if we’ve had it bad for so long that even the smallest good thing would seem too good to be true.”
“That’s a disturbing thought,” I said.
“Maybe. But what if it’s true?”
​
I didn’t know how to answer that.
“Either way… this isn’t much more than a break, isn’t it?” Dom asked, “The calm before the storm. I know that after we talk to the Director, Nina’s going right back in… and I’m going with her.”
I nodded before taking my coffee and joining him on the bed.
“I know,” I said. “And I’m going with you.”
“You know that you don’t have to, right?” Dom asked. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but I know that this kind of thing isn’t exactly in your wheelhouse. I’m not saying to just let it be or anything, but there’s other ways to help that don’t involve shooting things and burning down buildings.”
​
Again, I paused.
“Maybe,” I said. “Honestly, whatever I can do, I just want to do it. Whatever it may be. I’ve been just accepting things the way they were for too long, the same as you. I don’t want to just accept it anymore! I can’t.”
“And you aren’t,” Dom said, “I mean… shit, I watched you take pot shots at a Nightwalker the other night. Ever since we left, you’ve done whatever you can to help out. You’ve done a hell of a lot more to fix things than anyone else I know. That takes a hell of a lot of strength. More than I’d probably have in your shoes… honestly, you’re half the reason I’m still doing this, Cam.”
​
I looked at him and felt his hand pressing over mine.
“Only half?” I teased, trying to distract from the shade I could feel my cheeks flushing.
“Well, there’s everyone else too.” He said, “But right now, the one I care the most about is you.”
I actually broke down laughing at that and gently pushed him away.
“Too much?” He asked.
“No,” I said. “Just right.”
​
I let my head rest on his shoulder and for a little bit, we just sat together, hand in hand and beautifully content. I sensed him hesitating for a little while, before finally seizing the moment and placing his hand on my chin. I let him. He lifted my face and pressed a gentle kiss to my lips, one that I all too happily reciprocated.
​
After all… who knew when we’d get another chance?
​
***
​
The restaurant that Kallas brought us to was fairly quiet, although it wasn’t empty. As we walked in, I could see a large table set out with faces both familiar and unfamiliar at it.
​
Nina had washed almost an entire layer of dirt and soot off her face. Her hair looked cleaner and she was clearly wearing new, cleaner jeans. Although I didn’t think she’d actually changed her T-shirt. I recognized it by the neckline, but I’d never seen the whole thing before. It had a graphic of a warning label on it that said: ‘DO NOT USE FOR WET GRINDING’ although the ‘DO NOT’ part was crossed out in red.
​
Had she seriously been wearing that the whole fucking time…? At least it looked like she’d recently washed it.
​
Beside Nina, I saw Natalya, looking a little more cleaned up and wearing new clothes. Someone must have gotten her out of Puriysk earlier that day. The dark haired woman that Kallas had named as Dr. Di Cesare sat on the other side of Nina, although she was more focused on her own journal than any of us.
Lastly, I saw a man I didn’t recognize at all. He was tall and looked to be somewhere in his fifties, with wavy blond hair and a clean shaven face. He was dressed in a nice but slightly wrinkled suit.
​
The blond man was the first one to speak.
“Mr. Kallas, good to see you again,” He said as he got up to greet us.
“Director Durand, I have to say that the pleasure is all mine,” Kallas said, shaking Durand’s hand. His attention turned to us next.
​
“You two must be Camille Lambert and Dom Hoskins, it’s nice to meet you. I’m Milo Durand. I’m the Director of the Fae Relations Bureau’s Department of Public Safety.”
“Hell of a mouthful,” Dom said, shaking Durand’s hand.
“Just call us the FRB for short,” He said with a smile, “Take a seat. Dr. Di Cesare and I wanted to take some time to go through the situation with the Calhoun Pocket.”
​
Kallas pulled out some seats for us and we sat down. There were glasses of water waiting for us at the table. As soon as we sat down, Dr. Di Cesare glanced up at us, but didn’t close her notebook.
“So… now that we’re all here. Where should we begin?” Kallas asked.
“Well for starters, I’d like to get a solid picture of what exactly we’re going to be walking into when we send the rest of our people into the Calhoun Pocket,” Durand said, “Mr. Kallas, I’m aware you’re detachment has already properly secured Puriysk. But I’ve got some questions regarding the other towns so we know what else to expect once we’re inside.”
“What exactly is it that you want to know?” I asked.
​
“Well for starters, we need access to the other towns. We were told that navigating between them could be difficult, but I imagine there must be some way to circumvent that,”
“There is,” Dom said, “The roads don’t always go to the same places, but there are always landmarks and turns. You can use those to navigate.”
“One of the files I found in the archive at the Deputy’s Office has a list of landmarks and directions to reach the different towns,” Nina added, “I emailed you a copy earlier to go over,”
​
Durand nodded.
“Excellent. Which leads me to my next question. Infrastructure. I can’t imagine Calhoun’s been running a show like his without some means of providing food and power to the other towns. I’m aware that Rankin Mills had a power plant, so I figure that Calhoun is using that to keep the lights on. But what about food, gas, supplies?”
“Most of the food comes from Bakersfield,” I said. “There’s a lot of farmland there, most of it fairly safe from the mist. I used to work at a Roadhouse in Thompson Falls. We’d get deliveries every week or so.”
​
“I see… what about Puriysk and Thompson Falls? What’s there?”
“Puriysk was where they trained a lot of the Sheriff’s Boys,” Dom said. “They had the largest Deputy’s Office outside of Parsons. And Thompson Falls was more of a mining community. Lotta the construction work that was done in Parsons was done by people brought in from Thompson and Puriysk.”
​
Durand raised an eyebrow.
“Construction in Parsons?” He asked.
“Calhoun’s sorta been using it as his capital. Far as I can tell, he’s been trying to build up the towns, although Parson’s the one that’s gotten the most attention,” Dom said. “I guess it’s as close to a capital city as we’ve got in there. He also mentioned the ‘Sovereign Nation of Calhoun’ although I haven’t heard anyone outside of Parsons use that name.”
“Sovereign Nation of Calhoun…” Durand repeated, before glancing at Nina. She just gave a slightly defeated nod as if to say: ‘Yeah, he actually called it that.’
​
“Okay… let’s talk about Calhoun himself… what do you know?” Durand asked.
“Not a hell of a lot,” Dom said, “Closest I’ve ever come to actually meeting the guy is when he spoke to us outside of the church last night. Other than that, he rarely leaves his house in Parsons and rarely appears in public and most of what I’ve heard is just rumors.”
​
“Whatever you’ve heard… odds are that it’s true,” Natalya said quietly, drawing all eyes at the table over to her.
“I’ve heard the story enough times now… first from my mother, then from so many afterward. One day, the days just grew dimmer. The clouds above us just grew so thick that you could not see the sun and the mist drifted through the streets. The roads no longer led to the same places… and at night, the shadows moved, devouring any in their paths alive and screaming. First, it came for Parsons, then Rankin, Puriysk, Bakersfield, and Thompson. One by one. In time, it will come for others. He will come for others.”
​
Durand leaned in a little bit, listening intently. Dr. Di Cesare had also paused, listening as Natalya spoke.
“My mother told me that after the change, Calhoun’s people began to enter the town. Drunken louts, filling up the bars demanding free alcohol in exchange for ‘protection’ from the things outside. Although even with the alcohol, they still left bodies in their wake.”
She paused, slipping back into old, bitter memories.
​
“She told me of the ways Calhoun had changed Puriysk… most of the men either joined his little militia out of necessity or were given other jobs where they were worked to the bone. And the women…” She paused, “The homemakers he generally left alone but the young and the pretty ones found their way into the brothel. After all, his soldiers needed something to do to pass the time when they weren’t drinking and acting like children with guns. Governor Calhoun raped Puriysk, just the same as he raped every other town he took. All my life, I’ve watched as he’s milked them for his own gain and spread like a disease across new towns, looking for more. Before I even understood what home was, he had taken my home from me. Before I was old enough to speak, he had taken my life from me. Because of him, I grew up in a brothel in a town that does not exist.”
​
Durand was silent, before looking at Nina who drummed her fingers on the table.
“Valentine?” He asked.
“Like Dom said, the only interaction we had with that guy was when he talked to us last night,” She said. “I’m not a psychologist but I’d figure most of what he said is pretty on par with what a narcissistic megalomaniac with delusions of grandeur would probably say. It was probably a whole lot of horseshit… probably…”
“But?” Durand asked. Nina sighed.
​
“There was one thing he said that stood out, he said that if we killed him, we’d be killing everyone else in the pocket too. He made it sound like his life was tied to it, or something. I don’t know if he can actually fucking do that or not but I’m also not sure I’d want to chance it. Some of those documents I found in the Puriysk archive mentioned Calhoun and something called ‘The Eldest’.”
​
At the mention of the name, Dr. Di Cesare looked up.
“Gretchen,” Durand asked, “Do you recognize that name.”
Gretchen Di Cesare gave a curt nod before flipping through her notebook to a previous page. As she did, I noticed her sleeve lifting briefly, revealing a tattoo on her wrist. Two wavy, parallel lines. It looked like the zodiac sign for ‘Aquarius.’
“The Eldest… Old Fae. ‘The eldest’ according to myth, hence the name. Few documented encounters. None modern…” She paused to think for a moment, “Hard to kill… harder to control. Would need the heart either way. No small task but… possible… probable.”
​
“Old Fae?” I asked, “What exactly is that?”
“More or less exactly what it says on the tin,” Nina said. “Really old forest fae who got fucked up by the Midnight Grove… and a real fucking problem if that’s what we’re going to have to deal with. Do we even know how to kill an Old Fae?”
“As stated, the heart,” Dr. Di Cesare said, “Find that, kill the Fae. Would reckon that Calhoun has it. If not on his person, then somewhere safe. And should that fail…”
She removed the revolver from her coat pocket and set it down on the table without a word.
​
“A contingency. Custom revolver, specialized blessed rounds - Malvian ice.”
I saw Nina raise an eyebrow.
“You put Malvian ice in a gun?” She asked.
“What’s Malvian ice?” I asked. I figured that this conversation required a bit of context.
“Frozen mist, obtained from the domain of an Ancient God. In essence, a part of the God herself” Dr. Di Cesare said. “Weaponized - could kill anything beneath the Ancient Gods. Never tried it with bullets before, but the live fire trial yielded promising results.”
​
My mind flashed back to the Nightwalker we’d run into last night and the way its flesh had melted away after Dr. Di Cesare had shot it with that gun. The memory sent a chill through me.
​
“So you built a gun that can shoot an Old Fae dead?” Nina asked. I couldn’t tell if she was disturbed by the guns existence or excited to try it out.
“Old Fae, Grovewalkers, and most lesser Gods, amongst other things,” Dr. Di Cesare said. “So long as it has a physical form, it can be killed.”
“Dr. Di Cesare agreed to assist us with this job, in the interest of doing her own research on the Calhoun pocket,” Durand added. “The gun is her contribution to this project. It’s intended as more of an emergency measure than anything else. But if necessary, we could use it to kill whatever is allowing Calhoun to control the pocket reality.”
Nina just whistled and sat back in her chair. She seemed almost at a loss for words.
​
“So… all we need to do is shoot Calhoun or this ‘Eldest’ thing with that gun, after we get everyone out and we’re golden, right?” Dom asked.
“I would regard The Eldest as a higher priority than Calhoun right now,” Durand said. “Calhoun could have been lying about tying his own life to the existence of the pocket reality, but I’m not willing to take that gamble if I don’t have to. Right now, my gut is saying to try and take him alive.”
​
“He’s not gonna go quietly if we try,” Nina pointed out. “Hypothetical question, if we destroy the heart, would that take the risk of killing Calhoun out of the equation?”
“No. Whatever spell was used, would not die with the caster,” Dr. Di Cesare said.
Nina nodded thoughtfully.
“I see. Fuck.”
​
“To your point though: Killing Calhoun is likely inevitable. And while I lack any meaningful data on the spell used by the Eldest or how to circumvent it, I can predict the timeframe of such a collapse. The effect would not be immediate. Could take minutes, hours or days. There may be a window for escape.”
​
“We'll have time to cross that bridge when we get to it,” Durand said. “Last question I’ve got is about the local militia, but Mr. Kallas and I can discuss that with Valentine and Mr. Hoskins separately. In the meanwhile, I believe our first order of business should be eliminating collateral. We’ll start with Puriysk, then move on to Rankin Mills, Bakersfield, and Thompson Falls. Once we’ve cleared out those towns, we’ll focus on Parsons and Calhoun. Mr. Kallas, I’ll leave it to you to oversee the evacuation efforts. It’s probably redundant to say this, but we’ve got our work cut out for us, ladies and gentlemen so let’s keep our heads down, our minds sharp and get through this as cleanly as possible. Now… without any further ado, I promised you people dinner and I’m not going to put you all to work on an empty stomach. So, as the Estonians say: ‘Head isu.’”
​
***
​
Looking back, there was a sort of bittersweetness to that evening. On one hand, I don’t remember the last time I’ve eaten so well. After dinner, I went back to the hotel, enjoyed my hot shower, and sank into my warm sheets, waiting for Dom to come back from his meeting with Nina, Kallas, and Durand.
​
And yet… at the same time, all I could think about was what would happen in the morning. In the morning, we’d be leaving again, going back to Puriysk. Back to Calhoun. Part of me almost dreaded it, fearing that if I left this place then I’d never get to come back again.
​
But listening to Durand and the others talk during that briefing… so much of it went completely over my head and I couldn’t help but feel like that was a good thing. They’d been focused, precise, knowledgeable and most of all, prepared.
​
Calhoun’s threats lingered in the back of my mind, but they seemed so much smaller now. I struggled to imagine that Calhoun and the Sheriff’s Boys could do much the face of what had come for him, even with some kind of all powerful Fae at his disposal. Just Nina alone had been enough to rip Puriysk from his grasp… what could an army of her do?
​
I should have taken comfort in that idea. I did take comfort in that idea. But I still couldn’t help but worry all the same. Maybe what Dom had said earlier was true. Maybe we’d had it so bad for so long that even the smallest good thing now seemed too good to be true… maybe. When Dom came back, I was waiting for him. We lay in bed together, talking quietly to each other about what was going to happen in the morning, and holding hands, we drifted off into sleep.

First Entry
Second Entry
Third Entry
Fourth Entry ​
Fifth Entry
​
Journal of Camille Lambert - April 12th
​
We could see the shadows of the Nightwalkers from our place by the bonfire. They peeked in through the broken windows of the church, watching us from afar but never actually entering the ruins. I’m not sure if the firelight was what kept them away, or the protective runes that Nina had drawn.
​
Nina sat on a fallen column, watching them in case they tried anything… and yet if I walked over to the right side of the circle of columns that we’d set up our bonfire in, she seemed… dimmer. Like she was there and yet not there at the same time.
​
Dom on the other hand was crystal clear. I could see him sitting by the door of the church. I couldn’t see him at all from the left side of the circle. The mist was too thick. But on the right side, he was right there, impossible to miss. The effect was surreal, to say the least. He was holding the device Nina had used to call in her backup. She’d called it a phone but it didn’t look like any phone I’d ever seen.
​
“ETA, an hour or so for the standby team in Tallinn, 15 hours for the rest,” Nina had said after she’d made her call. “Let’s get comfortable.”
I figured that it’d been about an hour and a half since she’d said that. Standing by the bonfire itself, the world past the columns seemed to be in flux. Sometimes I could see mist through the windows and the holes in the ceiling. Sometimes I could see stars.
​
Shadows of smaller Nightwalkers darted past the church door sometimes, lingering only long enough to look in on us before retreating back into the darkness. Nina watched each one like a hawk, gripping her shotgun tightly.
I walked out to sit with her for a bit, leaving the light of the fire for a little while. Even from her vantage point, I still couldn’t see Dom but at least I knew he was safe enough.
“How many do you think are out there?” I asked quietly.
“Too many,” Nina replied. “We’re not going back to Puriysk tonight, that’s for damn sure.”
​
As she spoke, I saw more shadows moving in the dark, skittering away into the mist.
“You sure you want to stay out here? Might be safer to stay with Dom,” I said.
“Probably, but it’s better if I stay here. If the door closes, I’m better off on the inside. Be easier to open it again, that way.”
“Fair enough,” I said, looking back out into the mist. I could see nothing past it.
​
No shadows. No movement. There wasn’t even any noise. Nina looked up at the darkness again.
“Is it just me or is it quieter out there?” She asked.
“No… it’s quieter out there,” I said. “Could be there’s a big one nearby. Dom said that the small ones usually avoid them.”
​
Nina kept staring out at the mist, but the silence remained. I wasn’t sure if she was genuinely worried or not. After a few minutes, I saw movement in the mist again. I heard the rustling of trees and saw something standing in the dark. I almost thought that it might have looked like a man… almost. But I couldn’t fully make out the shape of it.
​
I could see the eyes of the Nightwalker shining in the firelight, before it finally moved, darting out of sight. Nina watched it go, before returning her attention to me.
“Good news is, we won’t be alone for that much longer,” She said. “After the first group shows up, we can head into Puriysk with them and start setting up shop. By the time the rest of them arrive, we should be in a good place. After that, it’s just a matter of getting people out and dealing with Calhoun,”
“You make it sound easy,” I said.
“I mean, it probably won’t be a walk in the park,” Nina admitted. “But at least we won’t be running this job alone. These things go easier when you’ve got help.”
“Yeah… I imagine they would,” I said.
​
Beside us, I heard a dull thud as a piece of one of the church's more damaged walls fell away and crashed to the ground. Nina was up on her feet immediately, shotgun in hand. I rose to my feet beside her.
“The fuck was that?” She asked.
“Part of the wall, I think,” I said. I spotted the spot where it had fallen and looked up. It had probably come off one of the broken domed towers near the door. One of their ceilings had come down ages ago and I imagined it wouldn’t take much more than a strong gust of wind to knock over some of the loose bricks jutting out from where the roof remained. Nina approached the fallen piece of brick, pausing to inspect it.
​
“Hell of a big chunk of wall,” She said before looking up again. I did the same, although as I did, I could’ve sworn I saw movement out of the corner of my eye. I looked over at it. The shadows cast by the bonfire left pools of darkness along the ceiling.
​
But in those pools, I could see flickering reflections of light.
​
Two of them.
​
Staring right at me.
​
Slowly I reached out, putting a hand on Nina’s shoulder. I didn’t want to yell or move too quickly. I couldn’t see what was in the darkness but I know that it looked poised to strike. Nina looked over at me, before tensing up. I knew that she saw it too. The eyes remained trained on us, and I heard a low, animal hiss coming from the shadows.
“Bonfire…” Nina said, gripping her shotgun tighter “Get Dom… now.”
​
I took a step back and saw the eyes following me. Nina backed away from the shadows, eyes never leaving the ceiling. I saw limbs splaying outward from the darkness. I could see them tensing up. It was going to lunge.
​
“MOVE!” I said, breaking into a sprint, but it was too late. The Nightwalker launched itself at Nina like a bullet. I heard her shotgun fire twice, before the creature crashed into the ground, flailing violently. I could see long, dark limbs, more than any human should have struggling to pick itself up. I could see a body that only vaguely resembled a man. It had a torso, a human head, and long black hair, but looked more like a spider than a person. And yet there was something off about it. Something I hadn’t seen on any of the other Nightwalkers. This one had some kind of sigil on its forehead. Something that looked almost like a crimson eye, that seemed to glow with surreal energy.
​
The Nightwalker looked at Nina, snarling at her. When it opened its mouth, I could see rows upon rows of teeth inside. She fired her shotgun again, but the creature barely even seemed to notice them. Even after she’d gone through the trouble of cursing them, her rounds weren’t doing anything.
“RUN!” I heard her yell, and I didn’t dare question that. I just ran.
​
I sprinted toward the bonfire, just in time to see Dom running toward me. He took aim at the Nightwalker, firing at it as it tried to go after Nina. But his bullets did next to nothing to it. The Nightwalker didn’t even look at him.
​
It just kept going for Nina, almost pinning her down. She unloaded two more shells into its face, which did little more than make it flinch and bought her some time to run.
​
This time, she took off at a sprint toward the bonfire. Dom saw her running and started to backpedal as well, running back toward the bonfire and the safety of the columns. The creature paused as we took shelter by the fire, watching us intently and letting out another serpentine hiss. Nina stared back at it, before looking back at the fire. She tossed her shotgun aside and hastily grabbed one of the spare branches we’d kept for the bonfire. She put it in the fire, before pulling it out and brandishing it like a weapon. The Nightwalker hissed and recoiled a bit, focused on the flame. As it paused, Dom grabbed Nina’s shotgun off the ground and took aim.
​
“Don’t…” She said, putting a hand up to stop him, her voice low and intense. She didn’t dare look away from the Nightwalker. “Save the cursed rounds… they won’t kill it. Just get outside.”
“What about you?” Dom asked.
“Outside,” Nina repeated. “Now.”
I put a hand on Dom’s shoulder.
“Let’s go!” I said, trying to tug him along behind me.
​
He hesitated for a moment longer before finally letting me take him. We backed through the right set of columns, and once we were through I saw Nina taking a step away from the bonfire, toward the right set of columns. The Nightwalker passed the left set of columns, trying to follow her.
“Come on…” She said under her breath, “Come and get me, shithead…”
​
I saw it inching closer to her, and tensing up again, getting ready to pounce. That was when Nina made her move. She thrust her burning branch into the Nightwalker's face, earning a cry of pain from it and making it jerk back. I saw it swatting at the branch, trying to get rid of the fire. Nina took the chance to run, sprinting at top speed toward the door of the church.
“GO!”
​
Neither of us needed to be told twice. We ran for the church door, as the Nightwalker let out a roar from behind us. I looked back to see it charging toward us again, gaining ground. As we ran back out into the field, we were greeted by countless blinding lights. I saw Nina pause, before feeling her grab me by the back of the shirt and pull me away. I could see Dom in her other hand. She dragged us both down to the ground in the instant before the Nightwalker emerged from the door of the church.
​
I saw it recoil, putting up its clawed hands to try and shield its eyes from the blinding light.
​
Then I heard the gunfire.
​
As my eyes adjusted to the light, I could see several men, each holding automatic rifles advancing on the Nightwalker. It shrank back toward the church, trying to shield itself from the gunfire, clearly overwhelmed. But just like with Nina’s shotgun before it, the bullets did little to harm it. Despite all the gunfire it took, it didn’t fall. I could hear it hissing, I could see its beady black eyes darting around wildly. It lunged forward again, tackling one of the nearby men and tearing into him, before going after another. I saw its jaws close around his skull and heard the sickening crunch of bone as it took his head. The other men scrambled back, trying to put as much distance between themselves and the Nightwalker as they could. It howled in rage, preparing to charge after them when a final, deafening gunshot echoed through the night.
​
This time, the Nightwalker's entire body seized up. It let out an agonized scream. I could see its clawed hands clutching at a wound that had appeared on its chest… and I could see smoke rising out of that wound. It kept screaming and thrashing violently. Its limbs gave out from underneath it. I could see the wound in its chest sizzling and burning. I saw the flesh and skin sloughing off of its body, and I could see the pale white bone underneath.
​
The eye sigil on its forehead flickered before fading away and the Nightwalker let out one final, howl before collapsing to the ground, its body still twitching and convulsing. I looked over to see a single woman standing calmly by the nearby trucks. She was tall and pale, with long, stringy black hair and an intense look in her eye.
​
She was dressed in a long beige coat and holding an ornate revolver in one gloved hand. As the Nightwalker died I saw her gingerly slip the pistol into the inner pocket of her coat before reaching into another pocket for a notebook. Without ever looking away from the dead Nightwalker, she scribbled something down, then pocketed the notebook again and calmly walked toward the church, not even pausing to acknowledge anyone else around her. As she left, I saw the other armed men tending to their dead. With the Nightwalker dead, I could get a better look at them now. They were dressed like soldiers, with bulletproof vests and no shortage of pockets. A few of them wore netted veils over their faces, making it hard to get a good look at them and giving them an eerie appearance, although watching them examine the bodies of their dead and respectfully carrying them away was almost humanizing.
​
Nina sat up, her blonde hair messy and a somewhat disoriented look on her face. She looked over toward the source of the lights that had blinded us. Four large SUVs were parked outside of the church, their headlights shining on the door. From those SUVs, I could see more armed men getting out and one of them was coming toward us.
​
“Nina Valentine?” I heard him ask. He had a heavy Slavic accent.
“Still alive,” She said, as she slowly climbed to her feet.
“Good. I’m Olev Kallas, I’m from the Tallinn Office, Director Durand sends his regards,” He offered Nina a hand to shake and she reluctantly took it. “The Director is currently en route, as are the rest of the team. In the meanwhile, we’re here to help.”
“Yeah and right on fucking time too,” She said, looking over at the dead Nightwalker.
​
“Ah… yes, you can thank Dr. Di Cesare for that,” Kallas said.
Nina raised an eyebrow. I had a feeling that she recognized the name, but she didn’t comment on it.
“But first, I imagine you and your friends must need a hot meal and a cold drink right about now and I can get you both.”
“Oh you’ve got no fucking idea…” Nina said, as Dom helped me to my feet. She waited until we were up, before gesturing for us to follow as Kallas led us toward one of the SUV’s.
​
***
​
I barely recognized the empty field around us as Puriysk. The buildings were all long gone and in their place was a paved highway that I’d never seen before.
“The town’s been gone for as long as I can remember,” Kallas said. “I couldn’t tell you if it was us, or the Soviets who got rid of the ruins. I read somewhere that there was some talk about refurbishing the old Church, but as you see, nothing ever came of it.”
“Thank God for small miracles,” Nina said, “Made my job a hell of a lot easier.”
​
We drove down the highway, past the wide open landscape and as we drove, I couldn’t help but admire it. In the distance, I could see the lights from another nearby town and watched as they drew closer and closer. God, I’d never seen a place so full of life before. As we drove along the quiet streets, past the sleeping buildings in the early hours of the morning, they still seemed so alive. Street lights cast a warm glow on the few passersby out doing their business. There were more cars on the road than I’d ever seen before, some driving past us to their own destinations and others parked and still.
​
“I can drop you three off at a hotel if you’d like,” Kallas offered. “You can get cleaned up and have a short rest before Director Durand arrives. I can pick up some fresh clothes for you, and then we can have a debrief over dinner.”
“Yeah, works for me,” Nina said before looking over at us.
“Dinner sounds good,” I said, although at the time I had no idea what exactly a hotel was. Thankfully, I got my answer pretty quickly.
​
The room I got was comfortable. The bed was softer than anything I’d ever laid on before and the hot water… oh God… I spent almost an hour in the shower alone, enjoying the steam and feeling the tension drain out of my muscles. When I was done, I put on a soft, fluffy bathrobe and laid down, letting myself relax for the first time in days. I almost dozed off… and maybe I would have if I hadn’t heard a knock on my door.
​
I considered ignoring it and just letting sleep take me, but I figured I might as well make sure it wasn’t important. Tying my bathrobe a little tighter around me, I got up to answer the door and was greeted by Dom, still wet from the shower.
​
“Hey,” He said. “Sorry, I hope I’m not bothering you!”
“It’s fine!” I replied, putting on a smile, “Come on in.”
I opened the door all the way to let him inside, but he hesitated.
“No, it’s alright. I just thought I’d check on you. It’s been… well, it’s been one hell of a past few days. And this feels like the first chance we’ve had to really breathe in a while.”
“Yeah, no kidding,” I sighed. I still held the door open for him. “Well, we’re not going to have this conversation in the hall, so come on in. I’ve got a coffee machine in here and I’m dying to try it out.”
​
I’m not sure if it was the promise of coffee that made him accept my invitation or the realization that I probably didn’t want to be in the hall with just a bathrobe on, but he came inside anyway.I went to the coffee machine and tried to figure it out. They had these little cups that I’d never seen before, but otherwise, it seemed fairly straightforward.
​
“Man… it’s really something else out here, isn’t it?” Dom asked, going to sit down on the bed. “It’s just so bright out here!”
“I’m still not entirely convinced I’m not dreaming,” I admitted. I managed to get one of the cups into the coffee machine and watched as it pissed out a somewhat pathetic amount of scalding hot coffee that admittedly did smell very nice. It had a lovely vanilla aroma.
I brought the first cup over to Dom.
​
“Glad I’m not the only one,” He said as I went back to make another cup, “Honestly, I wasn’t even sure if Nina’s backup was even going to come through and I sure as hell didn’t expect any of this.”
“You and me both,” I said with a sigh, “Is it wrong to say that I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop?”
“Well, when something seems too good to be true…” Dom murmured, “Although then again… looking at what we had in there compared to what Nina’s been telling me about life out here, I can’t help but wonder if we’ve had it bad for so long that even the smallest good thing would seem too good to be true.”
“That’s a disturbing thought,” I said.
“Maybe. But what if it’s true?”
​
I didn’t know how to answer that.
“Either way… this isn’t much more than a break, isn’t it?” Dom asked, “The calm before the storm. I know that after we talk to the Director, Nina’s going right back in… and I’m going with her.”
I nodded before taking my coffee and joining him on the bed.
“I know,” I said. “And I’m going with you.”
“You know that you don’t have to, right?” Dom asked. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but I know that this kind of thing isn’t exactly in your wheelhouse. I’m not saying to just let it be or anything, but there’s other ways to help that don’t involve shooting things and burning down buildings.”
​
Again, I paused.
“Maybe,” I said. “Honestly, whatever I can do, I just want to do it. Whatever it may be. I’ve been just accepting things the way they were for too long, the same as you. I don’t want to just accept it anymore! I can’t.”
“And you aren’t,” Dom said, “I mean… shit, I watched you take pot shots at a Nightwalker the other night. Ever since we left, you’ve done whatever you can to help out. You’ve done a hell of a lot more to fix things than anyone else I know. That takes a hell of a lot of strength. More than I’d probably have in your shoes… honestly, you’re half the reason I’m still doing this, Cam.”
​
I looked at him and felt his hand pressing over mine.
“Only half?” I teased, trying to distract from the shade I could feel my cheeks flushing.
“Well, there’s everyone else too.” He said, “But right now, the one I care the most about is you.”
I actually broke down laughing at that and gently pushed him away.
“Too much?” He asked.
“No,” I said. “Just right.”
​
I let my head rest on his shoulder and for a little bit, we just sat together, hand in hand and beautifully content. I sensed him hesitating for a little while, before finally seizing the moment and placing his hand on my chin. I let him. He lifted my face and pressed a gentle kiss to my lips, one that I all too happily reciprocated.
​
After all… who knew when we’d get another chance?
​
***
​
The restaurant that Kallas brought us to was fairly quiet, although it wasn’t empty. As we walked in, I could see a large table set out with faces both familiar and unfamiliar at it.
​
Nina had washed almost an entire layer of dirt and soot off her face. Her hair looked cleaner and she was clearly wearing new, cleaner jeans. Although I didn’t think she’d actually changed her T-shirt. I recognized it by the neckline, but I’d never seen the whole thing before. It had a graphic of a warning label on it that said: ‘DO NOT USE FOR WET GRINDING’ although the ‘DO NOT’ part was crossed out in red.
​
Had she seriously been wearing that the whole fucking time…? At least it looked like she’d recently washed it.
​
Beside Nina, I saw Natalya, looking a little more cleaned up and wearing new clothes. Someone must have gotten her out of Puriysk earlier that day. The dark haired woman that Kallas had named as Dr. Di Cesare sat on the other side of Nina, although she was more focused on her own journal than any of us.
Lastly, I saw a man I didn’t recognize at all. He was tall and looked to be somewhere in his fifties, with wavy blond hair and a clean shaven face. He was dressed in a nice but slightly wrinkled suit.
​
The blond man was the first one to speak.
“Mr. Kallas, good to see you again,” He said as he got up to greet us.
“Director Durand, I have to say that the pleasure is all mine,” Kallas said, shaking Durand’s hand. His attention turned to us next.
​
“You two must be Camille Lambert and Dom Hoskins, it’s nice to meet you. I’m Milo Durand. I’m the Director of the Fae Relations Bureau’s Department of Public Safety.”
“Hell of a mouthful,” Dom said, shaking Durand’s hand.
“Just call us the FRB for short,” He said with a smile, “Take a seat. Dr. Di Cesare and I wanted to take some time to go through the situation with the Calhoun Pocket.”
​
Kallas pulled out some seats for us and we sat down. There were glasses of water waiting for us at the table. As soon as we sat down, Dr. Di Cesare glanced up at us, but didn’t close her notebook.
“So… now that we’re all here. Where should we begin?” Kallas asked.
“Well for starters, I’d like to get a solid picture of what exactly we’re going to be walking into when we send the rest of our people into the Calhoun Pocket,” Durand said, “Mr. Kallas, I’m aware you’re detachment has already properly secured Puriysk. But I’ve got some questions regarding the other towns so we know what else to expect once we’re inside.”
“What exactly is it that you want to know?” I asked.
​
“Well for starters, we need access to the other towns. We were told that navigating between them could be difficult, but I imagine there must be some way to circumvent that,”
“There is,” Dom said, “The roads don’t always go to the same places, but there are always landmarks and turns. You can use those to navigate.”
“One of the files I found in the archive at the Deputy’s Office has a list of landmarks and directions to reach the different towns,” Nina added, “I emailed you a copy earlier to go over,”
​
Durand nodded.
“Excellent. Which leads me to my next question. Infrastructure. I can’t imagine Calhoun’s been running a show like his without some means of providing food and power to the other towns. I’m aware that Rankin Mills had a power plant, so I figure that Calhoun is using that to keep the lights on. But what about food, gas, supplies?”
“Most of the food comes from Bakersfield,” I said. “There’s a lot of farmland there, most of it fairly safe from the mist. I used to work at a Roadhouse in Thompson Falls. We’d get deliveries every week or so.”
​
“I see… what about Puriysk and Thompson Falls? What’s there?”
“Puriysk was where they trained a lot of the Sheriff’s Boys,” Dom said. “They had the largest Deputy’s Office outside of Parsons. And Thompson Falls was more of a mining community. Lotta the construction work that was done in Parsons was done by people brought in from Thompson and Puriysk.”
​
Durand raised an eyebrow.
“Construction in Parsons?” He asked.
“Calhoun’s sorta been using it as his capital. Far as I can tell, he’s been trying to build up the towns, although Parson’s the one that’s gotten the most attention,” Dom said. “I guess it’s as close to a capital city as we’ve got in there. He also mentioned the ‘Sovereign Nation of Calhoun’ although I haven’t heard anyone outside of Parsons use that name.”
“Sovereign Nation of Calhoun…” Durand repeated, before glancing at Nina. She just gave a slightly defeated nod as if to say: ‘Yeah, he actually called it that.’
​
“Okay… let’s talk about Calhoun himself… what do you know?” Durand asked.
“Not a hell of a lot,” Dom said, “Closest I’ve ever come to actually meeting the guy is when he spoke to us outside of the church last night. Other than that, he rarely leaves his house in Parsons and rarely appears in public and most of what I’ve heard is just rumors.”
​
“Whatever you’ve heard… odds are that it’s true,” Natalya said quietly, drawing all eyes at the table over to her.
“I’ve heard the story enough times now… first from my mother, then from so many afterward. One day, the days just grew dimmer. The clouds above us just grew so thick that you could not see the sun and the mist drifted through the streets. The roads no longer led to the same places… and at night, the shadows moved, devouring any in their paths alive and screaming. First, it came for Parsons, then Rankin, Puriysk, Bakersfield, and Thompson. One by one. In time, it will come for others. He will come for others.”
​
Durand leaned in a little bit, listening intently. Dr. Di Cesare had also paused, listening as Natalya spoke.
“My mother told me that after the change, Calhoun’s people began to enter the town. Drunken louts, filling up the bars demanding free alcohol in exchange for ‘protection’ from the things outside. Although even with the alcohol, they still left bodies in their wake.”
She paused, slipping back into old, bitter memories.
​
“She told me of the ways Calhoun had changed Puriysk… most of the men either joined his little militia out of necessity or were given other jobs where they were worked to the bone. And the women…” She paused, “The homemakers he generally left alone but the young and the pretty ones found their way into the brothel. After all, his soldiers needed something to do to pass the time when they weren’t drinking and acting like children with guns. Governor Calhoun raped Puriysk, just the same as he raped every other town he took. All my life, I’ve watched as he’s milked them for his own gain and spread like a disease across new towns, looking for more. Before I even understood what home was, he had taken my home from me. Before I was old enough to speak, he had taken my life from me. Because of him, I grew up in a brothel in a town that does not exist.”
​
Durand was silent, before looking at Nina who drummed her fingers on the table.
“Valentine?” He asked.
“Like Dom said, the only interaction we had with that guy was when he talked to us last night,” She said. “I’m not a psychologist but I’d figure most of what he said is pretty on par with what a narcissistic megalomaniac with delusions of grandeur would probably say. It was probably a whole lot of horseshit… probably…”
“But?” Durand asked. Nina sighed.
​
“There was one thing he said that stood out, he said that if we killed him, we’d be killing everyone else in the pocket too. He made it sound like his life was tied to it, or something. I don’t know if he can actually fucking do that or not but I’m also not sure I’d want to chance it. Some of those documents I found in the Puriysk archive mentioned Calhoun and something called ‘The Eldest’.”
​
At the mention of the name, Dr. Di Cesare looked up.
“Gretchen,” Durand asked, “Do you recognize that name.”
Gretchen Di Cesare gave a curt nod before flipping through her notebook to a previous page. As she did, I noticed her sleeve lifting briefly, revealing a tattoo on her wrist. Two wavy, parallel lines. It looked like the zodiac sign for ‘Aquarius.’
“The Eldest… Old Fae. ‘The eldest’ according to myth, hence the name. Few documented encounters. None modern…” She paused to think for a moment, “Hard to kill… harder to control. Would need the heart either way. No small task but… possible… probable.”
​
“Old Fae?” I asked, “What exactly is that?”
“More or less exactly what it says on the tin,” Nina said. “Really old forest fae who got fucked up by the Midnight Grove… and a real fucking problem if that’s what we’re going to have to deal with. Do we even know how to kill an Old Fae?”
“As stated, the heart,” Dr. Di Cesare said, “Find that, kill the Fae. Would reckon that Calhoun has it. If not on his person, then somewhere safe. And should that fail…”
She removed the revolver from her coat pocket and set it down on the table without a word.
​
“A contingency. Custom revolver, specialized blessed rounds - Malvian ice.”
I saw Nina raise an eyebrow.
“You put Malvian ice in a gun?” She asked.
“What’s Malvian ice?” I asked. I figured that this conversation required a bit of context.
“Frozen mist, obtained from the domain of an Ancient God. In essence, a part of the God herself” Dr. Di Cesare said. “Weaponized - could kill anything beneath the Ancient Gods. Never tried it with bullets before, but the live fire trial yielded promising results.”
​
My mind flashed back to the Nightwalker we’d run into last night and the way its flesh had melted away after Dr. Di Cesare had shot it with that gun. The memory sent a chill through me.
​
“So you built a gun that can shoot an Old Fae dead?” Nina asked. I couldn’t tell if she was disturbed by the guns existence or excited to try it out.
“Old Fae, Grovewalkers, and most lesser Gods, amongst other things,” Dr. Di Cesare said. “So long as it has a physical form, it can be killed.”
“Dr. Di Cesare agreed to assist us with this job, in the interest of doing her own research on the Calhoun pocket,” Durand added. “The gun is her contribution to this project. It’s intended as more of an emergency measure than anything else. But if necessary, we could use it to kill whatever is allowing Calhoun to control the pocket reality.”
Nina just whistled and sat back in her chair. She seemed almost at a loss for words.
​
“So… all we need to do is shoot Calhoun or this ‘Eldest’ thing with that gun, after we get everyone out and we’re golden, right?” Dom asked.
“I would regard The Eldest as a higher priority than Calhoun right now,” Durand said. “Calhoun could have been lying about tying his own life to the existence of the pocket reality, but I’m not willing to take that gamble if I don’t have to. Right now, my gut is saying to try and take him alive.”
​
“He’s not gonna go quietly if we try,” Nina pointed out. “Hypothetical question, if we destroy the heart, would that take the risk of killing Calhoun out of the equation?”
“No. Whatever spell was used, would not die with the caster,” Dr. Di Cesare said.
Nina nodded thoughtfully.
“I see. Fuck.”
​
“To your point though: Killing Calhoun is likely inevitable. And while I lack any meaningful data on the spell used by the Eldest or how to circumvent it, I can predict the timeframe of such a collapse. The effect would not be immediate. Could take minutes, hours or days. There may be a window for escape.”
​
“We'll have time to cross that bridge when we get to it,” Durand said. “Last question I’ve got is about the local militia, but Mr. Kallas and I can discuss that with Valentine and Mr. Hoskins separately. In the meanwhile, I believe our first order of business should be eliminating collateral. We’ll start with Puriysk, then move on to Rankin Mills, Bakersfield, and Thompson Falls. Once we’ve cleared out those towns, we’ll focus on Parsons and Calhoun. Mr. Kallas, I’ll leave it to you to oversee the evacuation efforts. It’s probably redundant to say this, but we’ve got our work cut out for us, ladies and gentlemen so let’s keep our heads down, our minds sharp and get through this as cleanly as possible. Now… without any further ado, I promised you people dinner and I’m not going to put you all to work on an empty stomach. So, as the Estonians say: ‘Head isu.’”
​
***
​
Looking back, there was a sort of bittersweetness to that evening. On one hand, I don’t remember the last time I’ve eaten so well. After dinner, I went back to the hotel, enjoyed my hot shower, and sank into my warm sheets, waiting for Dom to come back from his meeting with Nina, Kallas, and Durand.
​
And yet… at the same time, all I could think about was what would happen in the morning. In the morning, we’d be leaving again, going back to Puriysk. Back to Calhoun. Part of me almost dreaded it, fearing that if I left this place then I’d never get to come back again.
​
But listening to Durand and the others talk during that briefing… so much of it went completely over my head and I couldn’t help but feel like that was a good thing. They’d been focused, precise, knowledgeable and most of all, prepared.
​
Calhoun’s threats lingered in the back of my mind, but they seemed so much smaller now. I struggled to imagine that Calhoun and the Sheriff’s Boys could do much the face of what had come for him, even with some kind of all powerful Fae at his disposal. Just Nina alone had been enough to rip Puriysk from his grasp… what could an army of her do?
​
I should have taken comfort in that idea. I did take comfort in that idea. But I still couldn’t help but worry all the same. Maybe what Dom had said earlier was true. Maybe we’d had it so bad for so long that even the smallest good thing now seemed too good to be true… maybe. When Dom came back, I was waiting for him. We lay in bed together, talking quietly to each other about what was going to happen in the morning, and holding hands, we drifted off into sleep.

I’ve been reading up on Stoicism and mindfulness for years now. I journal every couple days and sometimes hit long streaks. I recently got a fitness tracker and hit my goals daily. I’m not lazy and cook, clean, tidy, etc daily to keep a tranquil place. I’m present and in the moment. I watch my child do new things and watch it live instead of trying to record it for social media. I walk with my pup daily and soak in the sun or air and watch him find joy in his constant sniffing or rolling in snow. However, nothing seems to make me truly joyful inside. I used to play video games, I could play them all night long and go to school the next morning and get right back at it the next evening, now I don’t really have the urge to even open the app. I’m not really sure what’s changed to be honest. I’m present and trying to enjoy every moment as it is but for some reason I’m just not seeming to really cherish it.
Has anyone felt this way and come out the other end and have some recommendations?

From the Journal of Private Elliot Stevens of His Majesty's Army:
"November 30th, 1887
The cold, biting air clung to my very bones as I awoke this morning. My breath hung like a ghostly cloud above my bed, whispering frosty threats in the dimly lit room. The relentless winds above had picked up with a renewed ferocity, wailing like banshees outside our meagre dwelling. It was as if the weather had a premonition of what was to come. The Great Storm that Captain Bill and the scientists from Camp Vulcan had warned us about seemed more imminent than ever.
Despite the frigid conditions, we donned our soiled, tattered clothing and prepared to face another day in the mines. The journey to the coal mines was a harrowing one. Each gust of icy wind felt like needles pricking my skin. My lungs burned from the frigid air as I struggled to breathe. I could not help but cast a glance towards the looming storm clouds in the distance, a grim reminder of the impending doom.
Upon arrival at the mine, we were greeted by the familiar, yet suffocating darkness. The lamps illuminated only a few feet ahead of us, casting eerie shadows on the black walls. The air was heavy with coal dust, making every breath a struggle. The only sound that filled the cavernous space was the rhythmic clanging of pickaxes against the stubborn rock.
As the hours passed, I could feel my body weakening under the strain of the ceaseless work. My hands were stiff and numb, the handle of my pickaxe slick with a mixture of sweat and grime. I could feel the relentless cold seeping into my very core, sapping what little energy I had left. But we pressed on, for our families and for our city. The coal we mined would mean warmth and survival for us all.
With each swing of my pickaxe, I thought of my two dear children, brave Johnny and sweet Elizabeth, huddled together in our modest home. I imagined their faces, pale and pinched from hunger, their eyes filled with a mixture of hope and despair. It was for them that I pushed my body to its limits, ignoring the screams of pain that echoed through my very being. I knew that if I could provide just a bit more warmth, I might be able to stave off the cold and the darkness that threatened to consume us all.
As the day wore on, the conditions in the mine grew more treacherous. The walls seemed to close in around us, and the cold intensified as if the very heart of the storm had descended upon us. The darkness seemed to press in, and I felt my sanity slipping away. It was during these moments that I clung to the memories of happier times, when the sun had still shone upon our faces, and laughter filled the air.
Then, without warning, the ground began to tremble beneath our feet. A deafening roar filled the air, and the walls of the mine seemed to come crashing down around us. The world turned to darkness as I was thrown to the ground, my pickaxe flying from my grasp. Panic and terror coursed through my veins as I tried to make sense of what was happening. It felt as if the very earth itself was crumbling beneath us, and I feared that we would be buried alive.
When the dust had finally settled, I found myself bruised and battered, but miraculously alive. Around me lay the twisted and broken bodies of my fellow miners, their eyes wide with terror even in death. The sense of loss and devastation was overwhelming, and I could not help but weep for those who had perished.
But there was no time for grief. With the Great Storm fast approaching, we had to salvage what coal we could and return to our families. As I made my way through the wreckage, I could not help but feel a growing sense of dread, as if the very air itself had become suffused with despair. I could feel the weight of the fallen miners' lives pressing down on me, a burden that seemed almost too heavy to bear.
As we salvaged what coal we could, the shadows in the mine seemed to grow longer and darker, as if to mirror the heaviness in our hearts. Each lump of coal felt like a part of the lost souls we carried with us, a symbol of the price we had paid for our survival. I could not help but think of the families who would now face the cold and darkness without their loved ones, and I silently vowed that their sacrifices would not be in vain.
The journey back to New London was a somber one. The air was thick with the scent of impending snow, and the howling wind seemed to carry with it the whispers of the dead. I could not shake the feeling that we were being watched, as if the spirits of our fallen comrades were urging us onwards, desperate for us to make it back to our families.
Upon reaching the city, we were met with a scene of chaos and despair. The Great Storm had arrived sooner than expected, and the streets were filled with panicked citizens desperately trying to secure what little shelter they could. Snow fell in thick, suffocating blankets, and the wind tore through the streets like a ravenous beast.
My heart ached as I thought of my family, huddled together in our tiny home. I clutched a small bag of coal that I had secreted away to my chest, as if to protect it from the storm. It was a small offering, but it could mean the difference between life and death for my loved ones. As I trudged through the knee-deep snow, I could not help but think of the terrible price we had paid for our survival, and I wondered if we would ever find our way out of the darkness.
As I entered our home, my children rushed to greet me, their eyes filled with relief and gratitude. They wrapped their thin arms around me, their bodies trembling with cold and fear. It was in that moment that I knew we would survive, that the love that bound us together would be stronger than the storm that raged outside our door.
I stoked the fire with the coal I had brought, and we huddled together, our hearts beating in unison as we shared the warmth of our love. As the flames flickered and danced before our eyes, I could not help but feel a sense of hope stirring within me. I knew that we would face many hardships in the days to come, that the darkness and cold would test us in ways we could never imagine.
But in that moment, surrounded by the love of Johnny and Elizabeth, I knew that we would persevere. For in the face of darkness and despair, love is the one light that can never be extinguished. And it is this love that will guide us through the storm, and lead us to a brighter tomorrow.
So here I sit, penning this journal entry by the flickering light of the fire. I write these words as a testament to the strength of the human spirit, to the resilience and love that defines us all. And though the wind may howl outside our door, and the darkness may threaten to consume us, I know that we will stand strong, and that we will find our way back to the light."

From the Diary of Catherine Price, written on November 20th, 1887:
"Dearest Diary,
Today began like any other day since my arrival in this frostbitten place they call New London. I awoke before the dawn, shivering beneath my meagre blankets, and hastily prepared myself for another day at the sawmill. My hands, once delicate and smooth, are now chapped and rough from the toil I must endure to survive in this harsh environment. The sound of the whirring saws and the acrid smell of sawdust seem to have permeated my very soul.
The icy wind nipped at my exposed skin as I made my way to the sawmill, but I felt a strange warmth within me. It was the flame of hope that Major Wilkins had ignited with his impassioned speeches about the Brotherhood of the New Order. Oh, how I wish to be part of this brave new world he envisions, where even women might have a place outside the home.
At the sawmill, I joined the other labourers, our breaths visible in the frigid air. We exchanged weary smiles and words of encouragement before we began our day's work to transform the frozen trees of the Crater into refined lumber, which will be vital for further construction. The men and women of New London must work together to overcome the desolation that surrounds us and I feel an immense sense of pride to be contributing to our survival.
The work was gruelling, as ever. The once relentless rhythm of the saws now served as a reminder of our shared purpose. I worked alongside Mary, a newcomer to the city hearkening from poor Winterhome. She confided in me her fears for her daughter, traumatized by the catastrophe and now dependent upon the kindness of strangers for their care. Her eyes welled with tears, and I could not help but share her sorrow, for the fate of my own family is a mystery to me.
As we worked, I noticed a young man across the mill, a member of the City Watch. He seemed to be observing our labour with a mixture of curiosity and admiration. I must admit, Diary, that I felt a flutter in my chest at the thought of being noticed by such a dashing figure. Perhaps, in this time of darkness, there is room for love to blossom.
The day's work finally came to an end, and as I trudged back to my lodgings, I could not help but marvel at the resilience of the people of New London. Despite the hunger gnawing at our bellies and the cold that numbs our limbs, we press on, united by a dream of a better future.
The evening air was filled with the clamour of voices from The Pipe & Hole, where the followers of Major Wilkins had gathered to discuss his ideas. I longed to join them, to be part of this movement that promises to shape the very future of our society. But, alas, I am nervous that they will not recognize that my place is to be among them. It is my prayer that, in the New Order they speak of, I might find a voice and a purpose beyond what has ever been offered me. Tomorrow, if God still harbors some small mercy for my sake, I will find that young guard and request his company at the nightly meetings of the Brotherhood.
I must retire now, Diary, for another arduous day awaits me. But I write these words with the belief that, someday, the pages of this humble journal may bear witness to the birth of a world in which the sun rises on a New London, built upon the foundations of our determination and sacrifice."

[Other]
What would you think about an alternate universe with a female-Clark as Superwoman in the golden age, is the only change together with her love interest, is not Earth-11...meet Clara Kent/Superwoman!
[this is just a stunt for discussing characters on a Superfamily alternative universe and for a potential fan art serie or fan fic, every criticism, joke, comment, suggestion, question is well received!]
NAME: KALA-EL/CLARA JOSEPHINE KENT/SUPERWOMAN
BORN: Krypton, a moon in a distant galaxy// 28/02/1918, SMALLVILLE, KANSAS
PROFESSION: ASSISTANT REPORTER
YEAR: 1948
PLACE: METROPOLIS (NYC)
-Farmgirl, born Kansas 1918. No sisters no brothers.
-Nicest girl in the office but very unffuny
-Disappears without reason very often.
-Lives alone in a little flat, has a dog called Krypto
-Daddy issues, his father didn’t let her pursue a career as ballet dancer or swimmer (he didn’t want her to take advantage of her powers), died when she was 18
-Former nurse during the war
-Loves children and dogs
-Tomboyish trails. Not quite elegant.
-Music-Hall fan, Katherine Hepburn and James Stewart fan
-Favourite books: Scarlet Pimpernel adventures, Jane Austen, Upton Sinclair and Virginia Wolf, somewhat eclectic
-She does a lot of sucking up to his boss (not literally), a 1940s very liberal Republican style journalist Perry Weiss, chief editor of the Daily Planet. She hates her boss Cat Grant
-Ambiguous relationship with her other boss Louis Lane
-Strange friendship with young millionaire Bruce Wayne
-Always good scoops but never appears in the front line and too stubborn and independent to grow fast in the newspaper
-Progressive quaker like her fathers
-Civil rights supporter
-Hates General McArthur, hates even more Lex Luthor
-Loves Eleanor Roosevelt but also Governor Dewey.
-Hates guns
-Supports unions, splits ticket between Metropolis Liberal Party and the two main parties. Politicians must be kind.
- SUPERHEROINE LIFE
-Superpowers like invulnerability, flight, super-speed, super-stamina, super-strength, X-ray vision, etc
-Can flight to a Match100 speed
-Acts as Superwoman since 1945
-Defeated Zod invasion in 1946
-Initial bad relationship with Batman but now close friends and allies
-Didn’t act as Superwoman during the World War II because she was afraid of her powers, after the discovery of the holocaust and the atomic bombs she decided to step in and showed herself to the world on autumn 1945.
-Worst enemy: Lex Luthor, heir of Nikola Tesla, rocket engineer & CEO of TELCORP (Tesla-Luthor Co.)
-Deeply in love with Louis Lane, which strongly rejects the Superheroine
-Widely admired
FAMILY & ORIGINS
The El family & Krypton
Krypton was a decadent civilization located on a moon near a large gaseous planet in the orion belt. In the past they had visited earth and other planets expanding civilization, but their penchant for slavery, war, resource extraction and violence caused many of these projects to fail. Even in 10,500 BC the Kryptonians almost caused the terraforming of the earth, melting the poles and destroying Atlantis and other civilizations, causing among other things the end of the ice age.
Over the centuries the Kryptonians lost the fuel necessary to travel and ended up confined to their planet, dedicated to warfare, genetic engineering-creating clones whose organs they needed to extend their lives-to pleasure and to exploiting the subsoil of their planet.
Jor-El and Lara were a couple of scientists critical of the system and supporters of a kind of democracy and pacifism. They had a daughter, Kala-El in a natural way against all the rules of Krypton. Lara managed to manufacture a small ship capable of making a space jump to save her daughter from the end of Krypton. General Zod stole her design and managed to build a larger fleet of ships but Jor-El managed to sabotage them and send them to the phantom zone. Lara decided to send Kala to Earth because she felt that her culture was much kinder and more hopeful than Jor-El who preferred to send her to New Genesis, another inhabited planet far away.
Joe&Martha Kent, Kansas life
Joe and Martha Kent were a Quaker farming couple whose farm was struck by the pod carrying Kala-El in 1918. Although owners of substantial property they were a very humble, cooperative, austere, devout and civil rights-minded people. Martha Kent was a descendant of Kansas abolitionist guerrilla fighter John Brown. They both raised Clara very lovingly and unwilling to ask too many questions about the baby's origin. Clara was a very sickly child as her body did not adapt to the earth, she was affectionate and obedient and devoured books. The Kent family were avowed supporters of the New Deal and Joe Kent was one of the leaders of the local farmers union.
With puberty she developed very fast and her superpowers began to appear. Clara soon began to excel in swimming and ballet, but Joe forbade her to pursue a professional career to prevent her from taking advantage of her powers, and also forbade her to use her superpowers to help others, fearful of humanity's reaction and wary of savior messiahs in the era of interwar dictators. Clara rebelled against her father but eventually gave in. In 1936 Joe Kent died of a heart attack. Clara was unable to go to college after her father's death and worked as a teacher and nurse's aide in Smalville. Her engagement to Pete Ross, her teenage sweetheart failed in 1939 when she revealed her powers to Pete and he panicked, although he later promised to keep the secret.
Between 1939 and 1941 Clara lived in Canada and Alaska searching for the Fortress of Solitude but with the outbreak of World War II she decided to enlist as a nurse in the Pacific, refusing to use her powers except to help the wounded, fearing to cause more harm than good. After a leave of absence in 1944 she returned to Alaska where she found the Fortress of Solitude and its true origin.
After learning about the Holocaust first and the atomic bombs later, Clara decided to become Superwoman with the support of her mother Martha and emigrated to Metropolis, where in October 1945 she was hired by Louis Lane, who had just returned from Europe.
DAILY PLANET CHARACTERS
-Major Louis Lane, senior reporter in the Daily Planet, see below
-Perry Weiss, owner and editor in chief of the Daily Planet. Born in Oddessa in 1886. Jewish inmigrant from humble origins who became a skilled journalist and founded the Daily Planet as a tool of the Metropolis Republican Party to unseat the city bosses of the time. Still a staunch liberal, he supported Roosevelt in 1932 and 1936, is an ally of Mayor LaGuardia and won the Pulitzer Prize in the 1920s for defending the innocence of Sacco and Vanzetti. Friend and ally of Louis Lane's father. He is very demanding with his employees but is very fond of Clara. He admires and defends Superwoman despite Louis Lane's distrust. Best friend of Cat Grant.
-Cat Grant, Co-chair of Perry Weiss, Pulitzer winner, closeted lesbian and Ayn Rand Fan. Born 1901, she comes from a fine family of Metropolis Kineckerbockers. She is like Louis the least liberal element of the newspaper. To protect herself she married a very old friend of her father's who helped her lead a double life. For twenty years she lived with a painter named Margaret Ivy. Considered the best writer of the Daily Planet, in addition to being a journalist she has published two novels. Very elegant and popular in intellectual circles. She is tremendously authoritarian. She mistreats Clara a lot because she does not respect her authority and because of her different political ideas, but as Clara grows as a journalist and Cat Grant suspects that she is Superwoman, she will protect her and push her forward without Clara knowing it. Best friend of Perry Weiss.
-Assistant photographer Jimmy Olsen and best friend of Clara. He comes from a town in Massachusetts. He is 7 years younger than Clara. He is a party animal, friendly, generous and somewhat naive. Yet he is a skilled photographer who has been able to capture the worst of the night and day of Metropolis. Miraculously he always gets the best pictures of Superwoman (Clara helps him a little). Very democratic and complains about working for a newspaper that is too conservative for his taste. Adores Clara whom she treats as her big sister. It doesn't even cross her mind that she is Superwoman. Jimmy thinks that Louis is a snob and a bigot.
LOUIS LANE:
NAME: LOUIS LANE
BORN: 08/02/1912, METROPOLIS (NYC)
PROFESSION: SENIOR REPORTER
YEAR: 1948
PLACE: METROPOLIS (NYC)
-Rich family, born in 1912, first of 6 brothers
-Caustic, cynical, ironic but somewhat kind
-Commanding
-Lives in Park Avenue with a 6-year old daughter and his rich unfaithful wife. Very unhappy marriage
-Major rank during the war in the US army.
-Elegant, sportsman, plays violin.
-Teaches musics lessons in an orphan house in secret
-Not that snobbish nor Wasp, new rich family traits
-Classic music and literature lover
-Heavy drinker
-Does not enjoy journalism, thinking of quitting to politics or teaching literature
-Jewish father (Lane surname is a change from Lantzman), Irish catholic mother, raised catholic and religious, but not extremely orthodox
-His father is a self-made tycoon, started as democrat in the Tammany Hall switched to republican. Close ally of Mayor LaGuardia.
-Fought in the european theater during World War II. Conservative republican opposed to his father liberal republican views, loves McArthur.
-Has a good opinion of Lex Luthor, sees him as an innovator and freedom fighter.
-Perry Weiss favourite reporter.
-Very nice and paternalistic to Clara, pushes Clara's career forward despite Cat Grant's opposition. He is secretly in love with Clara. Although he rejects Superwoman and suspects she is the same person as Clara, he deludes himself and rejects these suspicions.
-Tired of New Deal Politics, anticommunist
-“a brilliant and kind man” for the majority of the Daily Planet staff, a “terrible asshole” for many others like Jimmy Olsen
-Strongly rejects Superwoman and other heroes
-Sometimes Clara really hates him.
-Famous line “Neither reds nor capes”
-He lives a bizarre love triangle with Clara Kent and Superwoman. Although he publicly rejects the superheroine he also desires her and he and Superwoman have had moments of passion, which Louis feels guilty about because he is married and because of his religion. On the other hand he is in love with Clara Kent as much as he rejects the figure of Superwoman, he deludes himself about the identity of both. A bit James Stewart in Vertigo, which destabilizes and infuriates Clara.
ENEMIES
Lex Luthor
Rocket engineer, CEO of TELCORP and Heir of Nikola Tesla. Brilliant scientist, defines himself as a "radical humanist", but in the early 30s supported closetely fascism to stop "imperialism" and "usury" and now secretly supports Stalin to defeat "predatory western capitalism". The world's greatest philanthropist. Loving father and husband. Hates Superwoman to death and believes she spells the end of humanity. Paranoid and ruthless but convinced that he does everything for the greater good.
General Zod & Faora
Political dissidents like the El on Krypton on the other hand believed that Krypton's only salvation lay in emigrating and invading, terraforming and exterminating other planets. They almost succeeded in a coup d'état but after their failure they and their henchmen tried to flee by space jumping their ships, Jor-El managed to sabotage the launch and send them to the phantom zone. Over the years they managed to escape and arrived on Earth in 1946, shortly after Clara showed herself to the world as Superwoman. They tried to exterminate all humanity but Superwoman and some American and Russian scientists managed to defeat them. Their invasion caused 5,000 human casualties but could have caused complete extermination. The experience was traumatic for Clara because she had to send Zod and Faora back to the phantom zone where they would surely die. Zod, Faora and their henchmen had not yet developed the full powers of a yellow sun like Earth's and so several of them were killed by human bombs and missiles. Their remains were stored by Russians and Americans. Superwoman managed to expel all Kryptonian technology and weaponry into space so that humans would not use it for warfare.
The Toyman
Former entrepreneur and inventor of the 1920s toy business who was ruined in the Great Depression by banks and various betrayals. After a crime spree he was imprisoned in 1933 but escaped from prison recently completely crazed and ready to take revenge on the whole city using his inventions.
Doomsday
A truly near-indestructible abomination mistakenly created by the U.S. military in Zone 51 using the remains of the Kryptonians defeated by Superwoman in the failed 1946 invasion and a strange alien technology found in Roswell that was hidden from Superwoman.
Brainiac "the eternal traveller"
An android, merging a famous astronaut and artificial intelligence, which was used by the first civilization of Krypton to collect information from other worlds. It is more than 100,000 years old. With the passage of time he revealed against the Kryptonians, became evil and phobic to any form of life that he considered imperfect or inferior. It caused the destruction of many cultures. He wanders through space visiting planets and analyzing life forms. He probably has no enthusiasm for humans, much less for a descendant of the House of El.
If you want to check some ai fan art you can find it here: THE SUPERWOMAN FROM KRYPTON by lordmallory on DeviantArt or here THE SUPERWOMAN FROM KRYPTON : ImaginaryDC (reddit.com)

Prices are firm, but I take off $.75 for every $10 spent (multiple items)
I accept PayPal, Venmo, & Cashapp
Codes are always split/dual portion where applicable, & have no DMI
Only redeem the portion you pay for
​
New additions:
10 Cloverfield Lane 4K/IT $3.5
1408 HD/VU $4.5
48 Hrs 4K/VU $6
50/50 HD/VU $4
600 Miles HD/VU $4
A Dog's Purpose HD/VU or IT $3
A Good Day to Die Hard (Extended) HD/VU $2.5
A Journal for Jordan HD/MA $5
A Man Called Otto (2022) HD/MA $10
A Private War HD/MA $4.5
A24 5-Film Horror Set (X, Hereditary, Green Room, It Comes at Night, Witch) HD/VU $15
Absolutely Fabulous The Movie HD/MA $4.5
Act of Valor SD/IT $1.5
After Yang (2022) HD/VU $5
Agent Game (2022) 4K/VU $5.5
Alien v Predator & AVP Requiem Bundle HD/MA $8
Almost Famous 4K/VU $5.5
Ambulance (2022) HD/MA $4.5
American Carnage (2022) 4K/VU $5.5
American Underdog HD/VU $4.5
Amores Perros 4K/VU $5.5
Amsterdam (2022) HD/MA $4.5
An American Pickle 4K/MA $6
Apocalypse Now (Final Cut) 4K/VU $5
Aqua Teen Forever: Plantasm (2022) HD/MA $6
Army of One HD/VU $3
Baby Driver HD/MA $4
Back to the Future SD/IT $1.5
Bad Times at The El Royale HD/MA $4.5
Batman Long Halloween Deluxe (2022) HD/MA $7
Belly 4K/VU $5.5
Black Adam (2022) HD/MA $5
Black Panther: Wakanda Forever (2022) HD/GP $5
Black Swan HD/MA $4
Blacklight (2022) HD/MA $4.5
Blair Witch (2016) HD/VU or IT $2.5
Blazing Saddles HD/MA $4.5
Blindspotting 4K/VU $5.5
Bloodshot HD/MA $4
Bloodwork HD/MA $4
Boss Baby 2-Film Set HD/MA $6
Brave 4K/MA $5.5
Bros (2022) HD/MA $6
Bullet Train (2022) 4K/MA $6.5 or HD/MA $5
Cecil B. Demented HD/VU $4.5
Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle HD/MA $4
Cinderella (2021) HD/MA $5
Clifford the Big Red Dog HD/VU $4
Clint Eastwood: A Cinematic Legacy HD/MA $3.5
Constantine: House of Mystery (2022) HD/MA $4.5
Cop Out HD/MA $4
Cotton Club Encore 4K/VU $5.5
Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon 4K/MA $6.5
Cutthroat Island HD/VU $4.5
Daniel Craig 007 5-Film Set 4K/VU $23
Death of Me HD/VU $4
Death on the Nile (2022) HD/GP $3.5
Deepwater Horizon 4K/IT $3
Defiance HD/VU $4
Den of Thieves HD/IT $3.5
Despicable Me 3 4K/IT $5
Die in a Gunfight 4K/VU $5
Dig HD/VU $6.5
Dirty Harry & Magnum Force Bundle HD/MA $8
Disturbia HD/VU $4.5
Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (2022) HD/GP $3.5
Dolittle 4K/MA $5
Downton Abbey: A New Era (2022) HD/MA $5
Duck Dynasty Wedding Special HD/VU $4
Earth Girls are Easy HD/VU $4
Easter Sunday (2022) HD/MA $6
Elvis (2022) HD/MA $4.5
Empire of Light (2022) HD/GP $6.5
Ender's Game HD/VU $2.5
Equalizer 2 HD/MA $3.5
Expired (2022) 4K/VU $5.5
F9: The Fast Saga (Theatrical & Extended) HD/MA $4
Face/Off HD/VU $4.5
Fair Game (Director's Cut) HD/VU $4
Fantastic Beasts: The Secrets of Dumbledore (2022) HD/MA $4.5
Fantastic Four (2015) HD/MA $3.5
Fantastic Mr. Fox HD/MA $4
Fatherhood HD/MA $4
Finding You 4K/VU $5
Flashback HD/VU $4
Fortress: Sniper's Eye (2022) HD/VU $5
Foxcatcher HD/MA $4
Friday the 13th 8-Film Set HD/VU $22
Friends With Kids HD/VU $4
From Here to Eternity 4K/MA $5.5
Ghost in the Shell (2017) 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Ghost Team One HD/VU or IT $3.5
Glengarry Glen Ross HD/VU $5
Gods and Generals (Director's Cut) HD/MA $4
Godzilla (1998) 4K/MA $6.5
Gone Girl HD/MA $4
Goosebumps HD/MA $3.5
Grease 4K/VU or IT $5.5
Green Lantern: Beware My Power (2022) HD/MA $4
Green Room HD/VU $4
Groundhog Day 4K/MA $7
Guns Akimbo HD/VU $4.5
Habit 4K/VU $5.5
Halloween Curse of Michael Myers HD/VU $4
Hard Luck Love Song 4K/VU $5.5
Heat (Director's Cut) (1995) 4K/MA $5
Hellboy Animated Double Feature (Sword of Storms, Blood & Iron) 4K/VU $7.5
Hellraiser Judgment HD/VU $4
Hitman (Uncut) & Hitman 47 Bundle HD/MA $7
Home Alone 2 HD/MA $3.5
Honk for Jesus. Save Your Soul. (2022) HD/MA $5.5
Hotel Transylvania HD/MA $3.5
Hustle and Flow HD/VU $4
I Frankenstein HD/VU or IT $2.5
I Know What You Did Last Summer 4K/MA $5.5
I Wanna Dance with Somebody (2022) HD/MA $8
I, Tonya HD/MA $4
In Secret (2014) HD/VU $4.5
In the Blood HD/MA $4
Interview with the Vampire HD/MA $4
Iron Man & Hulk: Heroes United HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Iron Mask (2019) HD/VU $4.5
Isle of Dogs HD/MA $4
Jeff Who Lives at Home HD/VU $4
Joe Kidd HD/MA or IT $4
Journey to the West: Conquering the Demons HD/VU $3.5
Joy HD/MA $3
Judy Moody SD/IT $1.5
Ju-On: The Grudge HD/VU $4.5
Jurassic World 6-Film Collection (Dominion: Theatrical & Extended) HD/MA $18
King Richard 4K/MA $5.5
Knives Out 4K/VU $5.5
Knowing 4K/VU $5.5
Knowing/Push Double Feature HD/VU $7.5
Labyrinth HD/MA $4.5
Lady of the Manor 4K/VU $5
Last Action Hero 4K/MA $5.5
Last Christmas HD/MA $4
Let Me In HD/VU $4.5
Let Them All Talk 4K/MA $5.5
Lightyear (2022) HD/GP $3
Lilo and Stitch HD/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $4
Little Monsters (1989) HD/VU $3.5
Locked Down 4K/MA $5.5
Lockout (Unrated) & Battle: Los Angeles Bundle HD/MA $7
Mack & Rita (2022) HD/VU $5.5
Mad Men: The Complete Series HD/VU $35
Mallrats HD/MA $4
Man of Tai Chi HD/VU $4
Mary Queen of Scots HD/MA $4.5
Meatballs HD/VU $4
Memory (2022) HD/MA $4.5
Men (2022) HD/VU $4.5
Men in Black 3 HD/MA $3
Mickey and Minnie 10 Classic Shorts HD/MA $6.5 or HD/GP $6
Midsommar HD/VU $4
Minions: Rise of Gru (2022) HD/MA $5.5
Miracle on 34th Street (1947) HD/MA $4
Mommy HD/VU $4
Monster High Electrified HD/VU or IT $2.5
Moonfall (2022) 4K/VU $5
Moonrise Kingdom HD/MA or IT $4
Morbius (2022) 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4 or SD/MA $2
My Fair Lady 4K/VU $5.5
Nashville (1975) HD/VU $4
Needle in a Timestack 4K/VU $5.5
No Suddent Move 4K/MA $6.5
Nope (2022) HD/MA $5.5
Nurse (2013) HD/VU $4.5
Paranormal Activity: Ghost Dimension (Unrated) HD/VU $4.5
Paterson HD/MA $4.5
Paws of Fury: Legend of Hank (2022) HD/VU $4.5
Percy Jackson Sea of Monsters HD/MA $3
Perfectos Desconocidos HD/VU $4
Peter Pan (1953) HD/MA $4
Peter Pan Return to Neverland HD/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $4
Phantom Thread HD/MA $4
Philadelphia 4K/MA $6
Pitch Black (Unrated) HD/IT $4
Pixels HD/MA $3.5
Poltergeist (1982) 4K/MA $6
Pompeii HD/MA $3.5
Ran (1985) 4K/VU $5.5
Rear Window HD/MA $3.5
Red Heat (1988) 4K/VU $5
Reminiscence HD/MA $3.5
Reservoir Dogs 4K/VU $5.5
Resident Evil: Retribution 4K/MA $5.5
Retaliation (2017) HD/VU $4
Rio 2 HD/MA $3
Rio SD/IT $1.5
Rise of the Planet of the Apes SD/IT $1.5
Saint Maud HD/VU $4.5
Saw 7-Film Collection (Unrated) HD/VU $18
Saw 8-Film Collection HD/VU $18
Scream (2022) 4K/VU $6 or HD/VU $4.5
Sense and Sensibility 4K/MA $5
Seven HD/MA $5
Sex Tape HD/MA $3.5
Siberia (2018) HD/VU $3
Silent Night, Deadly Night 3-Film Set (3-5) HD/VU $8
Silk Road 4K/VU $5
Sing Street HD/VU $4
Slender Man HD/MA $4
Smile (2022) 4K/VU $7.5
Smokin' Aces 4K/MA $5.5
Snake Eyes: G.I. Joe Origins 4K/VU $5.5
Sorry to Bother You HD/MA $4
Source Code 4K/VU $5.5
Spinning Man HD/VU $4
Spontaneous HD/VU $4.5
Strange World (2022) HD/MA $7 or HD/GP $6.5
Studio 666 (2022) HD/MA $5.5
Sucker Punch HD/MA $4
Superman Unbound HD/MA $4.5
Tar (2022) HD/MA $6.5
Teen Spirit (2019) HD/MA $4
Tetro HD/VU $4
The Addams Family: With More Mamushka! (1991) 4K/VU $5.5
The Art of Self-Defense HD/MA $4
The Assignment HD/VU $4
The Banshees of Inisherin (2022) HD/MA $5 or HD/GP $4.5
The Batman (2022) 4K/MA $5.5
The Bodyguard (1992) HD/MA $4
The Chronicles of Riddick (Unrated) HD/IT $4
The Colony 4K/VU $5
The Contractor (2022) HD/VU $4
The Dark Crystal 4K/MA $6
The Dentist 1 & 2 Collection HD/VU $6
The Disaster Artist HD/VU $4
The Emoji Movie HD/MA $3
The Favourite HD/MA $4.5
The Forbidden Kingdom HD/VU $4.5
The Gentlemen 4K/IT $4.5
The Great Wall 4K/IT $3.5
The Green Inferno HD/IT $4
The Hate U Give HD/MA $4
The High Note HD/MA $3.5
The House Next Door: Meet The Blacks 2 4K/VU $5.5
The House with a Clock in Its Walls 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
The Humans HD/VU $4.5
The Hunt HD/MA $4.5
The Incredible Hulk 4K/MA $6 or HD/MA $4.5
The Inhabitant (2022) HD/VU $5.5
The Interview HD/MA $3.5
The Island HD/VU $4.5
The Kid Who Would Be King 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
The King's Man HD/GP $3.5
The Last Duel HD/GP $3.5
The Last Samurai HD/MA $4
The Legend of Hercules 4K/IT $3
The Limey (1999) 4K/VU $5.5
The Lion King (1994) 4K/MA $5 or HD/GP $3
The Lost Boys (1987) 4K/MA $6
The Many Saints of Newark HD/MA $4
The Maze Runner HD/MA $3.5
The Menu (2022) HD/MA $5.5 or HD/GP $5
The Midnight Meat Train (Unrated) HD/VU $4
The Mitchells vs the Machines HD/MA $4.5
The Night House HD/GP $4
The Northman (2022) 4K/MA $6 or HD/MA $4.5
The Prince of Egypt HD/MA $4.5
The Princess and The Frog HD/GP $3.5
The Purge 5-Film Collection 4K/MA $22
The Raid: Redemption (Theatrical & Unrated) HD/MA $5
The Rescuers Down Under HD/GP $4.5
The Rescuers HD/MA $5 or HD/GP $4.5
The Right One 4K/VU $5.5
The Ring HD/VU $4.5
The Rules of Attraction HD/VU $4
The Scorpion King 4-Film Bundle (1, 3-5) HD/MA $12
The Skeleton Twins HD/VU $4.5
The Spirit HD/VU $4
The Suicide Squad (2021) 4K/MA $5.5
The Virtuoso 4K/VU $5
The Walking Dead: Season 5 HD/VU $6.5
The Warriors HD/VU $4
The Watch HD/MA or IT $3.5
The Weekend HD/VU $4
The Wicker Man (1973) HD/VU $4.5
The Witches (2020) 4K/MA $6
The Wolf Man (1941) 4K/MA $5
The Woman King (2022) HD/MA $5.5
There's Something About Mary HD/MA $5
Thor: Love and Thunder (2022) HD/GP $3.5
Those Who Wish Me Dead HD/MA $4.5
Tommy Lee Jones 4-Film Set (US Marshalls HD, The Client, Cobb, Space Cowboys) SD/MA $10
Touched With Fire HD/VU $4.5
Trading Places HD/VU $4
Triple 9 HD/IT $3.5
Troy (Director's Cut) HD/MA $4.5
Truth or Dare (Unrated) HD/MA $4
Tucker: The Man and His Dream 4K/VU $5
Turning Red (2022) HD/GP $3.5
Twilight HD/VU $4
Uncharted (2022) HD/MA $4
Underwater HD/MA $4.5
Unfriended: Dark Web HD/MA $4
Universal Classic Monsters 4-Film Set (Dracula, Frankenstein, Wolf Man, Invisible Man) 4K/MA $16
Vengeance (2022) HD/MA $5.5
Venom: Let There Be Carnage HD/MA $4
W. HD/VU $4
Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps SD/IT $1.5
Warhunt (2022) 4K/VU $5.5
Warlock (1989) HD/VU $4.5
We Bought a Zoo SD/IT $1.5
Where the Crawdads Sing (2022) HD/MA $4.5
Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory 4K/MA $5.5
X-Men Beginnings Trilogy (First Class, Days of Future Past, Apocalypse) HD/MA $9
X-Men First Class & Days of Future Past HD/MA $6.5
Zero Dark Thirty HD/MA $3.5
​
All other movies (A-Z)
101 Dalmatians HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
12 Strong HD/MA $3.5
12 Years a Slave HD/MA $3.5
13 Hours Soldiers of Benghazi HD/VU $2.5
1917 HD/MA $3.5
2 Fast 2 Furious HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
2 Guns HD/VU or IT $2.5
21 Jump Street HD/MA $3 or SD/MA $1.5
22 Jump Street SD/MA $1.5
3 From Hell (Unrated) 4K/VU $4 or HD/VU $2.5
3:10 to Yuma 4K/VU $5
31 (2016) HD/VU $2.5
47 Meters Down HD/IT $3.5
47 Meters Down: Uncaged HD/VU $3.5
47 Ronin 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $3
71 HD/VU $4
A Clockwork Orange 4K/MA $5
A Most Wanted Man HD/VU $3.5
A Quiet Place HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
A Quiet Place Part 2 4K/VU $5.5
A Star is Born (2018) 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
A Thousand Words HD/VU $4
A Wrinkle in Time 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
About Time HD/VU or IT $3.5
Action Point HD/IT $2
Adore HD/VU or IT $3.5
After Earth HD/MA $3
Age of Adaline HD/IT $2.5
Aladdin (2019) 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Alex Cross HD/VU or IT $2
Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day HD/GP $3
Alfred Hitchcock 5-Film Set (Saboteur, Shadow of Doubt, Trouble with Harry, Marnie, Family Plot) 4K/MA $24
Alice Through the Looking Glass HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Alien 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Alien 6-Film Collection HD/MA $18
Alien Covenant HD/MA $2.5
Alita Battle Angel 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
All Eyez on Me HD/VU or IT $3
All is Lost HD/VU $3.5
All Nighter HD/MA $3.5
All the Money in the World HD/MA $3.5
Aloha HD/MA $3.5 or SD/MA $1
Alvin and the Chipmunks: Road Chip HD/MA $2.5
America: Imagine the World Without Her HD/VU $1.5
American Assassin 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
American Frontier Trilogy (Sicario, Wind River, Hell or High Water) HD/VU $7.5
American Hustle SD/MA $1.5
American Made 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
American Night HD/VU $4
American Psycho (Uncut) 4K/VU $5
American Reunion HD/VU or IT $3
American Ultra HD/IT $4
Anchorman 2: Legend Continues HD/VU $2.5
Angel Heart 4K/VU $5.5
Angel of Mine 4K/VU $5.5
Anna 4K/VU $5
Anna Karenina HD/IT $3.5
Annie (2014) HD/MA $3.5 or SD/MA $1.5
Annihilation HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Antebellum 4K/VU $5
Ant-Man and the Wasp 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Ant-Man HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Apollo 13 4K/MA or IT $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Arctic HD/MA $4
Arnold Schwarzenegger 6-Film Collection (Last Stand, Total Recall, T-2, Red Heat, Maggie, Hercules in NY) HD/VU $14
Arrival HD/VU $2.5
Ash vs Evil Dead: Season 3 HD/VU $5
Ash vs Evil Dead: The Complete Series HD/VU $14
Assassination Nation HD/MA $3.5
Assassin's Creed HD/MA $3
Atomic Blonde 4K/MA or IT $4.5
August Osage County HD/VU $3
Avengers Age of Ultron HD/MA $3.5 pr HD/GP $3
Avengers Endgame 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Avengers Infinity War HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Back to the Future Trilogy 4K/MA $14.5 or HD/MA $10
Bad Boys for Life HD/MA $4
Bad Grandpa HD/VU or IT $2.5
Bad Words HD/IT $3
Bambi HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Bangkok Dangerous HD/VU $4
Barb and Star go to Vista Del Mar 4K/VU $5.5
Barbie & Her Sisters in the Great Puppy Adventure HD/VU or IT $3.5
Barbie in Princess Power HD/IT $3.5
Barbie: Star Light Adventure HD/IT $3.5
Batman Animated 3-Film (Gotham Knight, Under Red Hood, Year One) HD/MA $11
Battle of the Year HD/MA $3.5
Battleship HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Baywatch HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Beatriz at Dinner HD/VU $4.5
Beauty and the Beast (1991) HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Beauty and the Beast (2017) HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Before I Fall HD/VU or IT $3.5
Begin Again HD/VU $3.5
Ben-Hur (2016) HD/VU $3.5
Big Eyes HD/VU $3.5
Big Hero 6 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Big Little Lies: Season 1 HD/GP $2.5
Billy Elliot HD/IT $3.5
Billy Lynn's Long Halftime Walk HD/MA $4
Black Panther 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $2.5
Black Widow HD/GP $3
Blackhat HD/IT $3.5
Blockers HD/MA $3.5
Boardwalk Empire: Season 1 HD/VU or IT $4
Bombshell 4K/VU $5
Book Club HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Book of Eli HD/MA $4
Born a Champion 4K/VU $5
Boy Erased HD/MA $4
Boyhood HD/VU or IT $2.5
Braven HD/VU $4
Brian Banks HD/MA $3.5
Bullet to the Head HD/MA $3
Bumblebee HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Captain America: Civil War HD/GP $2.5
Captain America: First Avenger HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Captain America: Winter Soldier HD/GP $3.5 or SD/IT $1.5
Captain Marvel 4K/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $2
Captain Phillips SD/MA $1.5
Carol HD/VU $4
Carrie (2013) HD/VU $3.5
Cars 3 HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Cars HD/GP $3
Cell (2016) HD/VU $3.5
Chaos Walking 4K/VU $5
Chappie SD/MA $1.5
Charlotte's Web (2006) HD/VU $4
Chicago (Diamond Edition) HD/VU $4
Chips HD/MA $3
Christopher Robin HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Cloverfield 4K/VU $5.5
Cloverfield HD/VU $4
Coco HD/GP $2.5
Cold Pursuit 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Collateral Beauty HD/MA $3.5
Columbiana (Unrated) HD/MA $4
Come and Find Me HD/VU $4
Company of Heroes HD/MA $4
Contagion HD/MA $3.5
Contraband HD/IT $3
Cooties HD/VU $4
Cosmic Sin HD/VU $4
Crank 4K/VU $5.5
Crash (2004) HD/VU $4.5
Crawl 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Creature from the Black Lagoon (1954) HD/MA $3.5
Crimson Peak HD/IT $3.5
Cruella HD/GP $3
Cry Macho HD/MA $4.5
Daddy's Home 2 HD/VU or IT $3
Daddy's Home HD/VU $3
Darkest Hour (2017) 4K/MA $5.5
Dawn of the Planet of the Apes HD/MA $3.5
Daybreakers 4K/VU $5.5
Deadpool 2 (w/Super Duper Cut) 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Deadpool HD/MA $2.5
Deadwood: The Movie HD/VU $4
Dear Evan Hansen HD/MA $3.5
Dear White People HD/VU $3.5
Dementia 13 (Director's Cut) HD/VU $4
Denial (2016) HD/IT $4
Despicable Me 2 HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Despicable Me 4K/IT $5 or SD/IT $1.5
Detroit HD/MA $3.5
Dirty Dancing 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Disney Animated Short Films Collection HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Divergent HD/VU $1.5 or 4K/IT $2 or SD/VU $0.5
Divergent: Allegiant HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Divergent: Insurgent HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Django Unchained HD/VU $3
Do the Right Thing 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Doctor Strange HD/GP $2.5
Dom Hemingway HD/MA $3.5
Don't Worry, He Won't Get Far on Foot HD/VU $4
Doom (Unrated) 4K/MA $5.5
Dora and the Lost City of Gold HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Downton Abbey: The Movie HD/MA $4
Dracula (1931) HD/MA $3.5
Dracula Untold HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Draft Day HD/VU $3.5
Dragged Across Concrete HD/VU $3.5
Dream House HD/IT $3
Dreamkatcher HD/VU $4
Dredd HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Dumbo (2019) HD/GP $3
Dune (2021) 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Dying of the Light HD/VU $2.5
E.T. The Extra Terrestrial 4K/VU or IT $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Edge of Tomorrow 4K/MA $5
Edward Scissorhands HD/MA $3.5
El Chicano HD/MA $4
Encanto 4K/GP $3.5
Enemy at the Gates HD/VU $4
Enough Said HD/MA $3.5
Epic HD/MA $3
Escape Plan HD/VU $2
Eternals HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Everest 4K/IT $5
Ex Machina HD/VU $3
Exodus: Gods and Kings HD/MA $3.5
Extreme Prejudice (1987) HD/VU $4
Fast and Furious (2009) HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Fast and Furious 6 (Extended) HD/VU $2 or 4K/IT $2.5
Fast Color 4K/VU $5.5
Fast Five (Extended) HD/VU or IT $2.5
Fatale 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Father Figures HD/MA $3.5
Fences HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Ferdinand HD/MA $3.5
Fifty Shades Darker (Unrated) HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Fifty Shades Freed HD/MA $4.5
Fifty Shades of Grey (Unrated) HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Finding Dory HD/GP $2
Finding Nemo HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
First Blood 4K/VU $5
First Man HD/MA $4
Flight HD/VU or IT $3
Florence Foster Jenkins HD/VU or IT $3
Footloose (2011) HD/IT $3
Forever My Girl HD/IT $3
Forrest Gump HD/VU $3.5
Fortress HD/VU $4
Four Brothers HD/VU $4
Four Kids and It HD/VU $3.5
Fox and the Hound 2 HD/MA $4
Frank and Lola HD/VU or IT $3
Frankenstein (1931) HD/VU $3.5
Free Guy HD/GP $3.5
Friday the 13th: Pt 3 HD/VU $3.5
Frozen (Sing-Along Edition) HD/MA $2 or HD/GP $1.5
Frozen 2 HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Frozen HD/GP $2
Furious 7 (Extended) HD/VU $2 or 4K/IT $2.5
Fury HD/MA $3.5
G.I. Joe Retaliation HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Gambit (2012) HD/MA $4
Game of Thrones: Season 2 HD/VU $3
Gamer SD/IT $1.5
Gemini Man 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Get Out HD/MA $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Ghost in the Shell (1995) 4K/VU $5
Ghostbusters (1984) HD/MA $3.5
Ghostbusters 2 HD/MA $3.5
Ghostbusters: Afterlife HD/MA $4
Girls Trip HD/VU or IT $2
God's Not Dead 2 HD/MA or IT $2.5
Gods of Egypt HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Gold (2016) HD/VU or IT $2.5
Good Kill HD/VU or IT $3.5
Grace Unplugged HD/VU $2
Gran Torino SD/IT $1.5
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 1 HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2 HD/GP $2
Guest House 4K/VU $5
Gulliver's Travels SD/IT $1.5
Hacksaw Ridge HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Hail, Caesar! HD/IT $3
Hammer of the Gods HD/VU $2
Hancock SD/IT $1.5
Hands of Stone HD/VU $3.5
Hannibal: Season 1 HD/VU $5
Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters (Unrated) HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Hard Target 2 HD/IT $1.5
Hardcore Henry HD/VU or IT $3.5
Heaven is for Real SD/MA $1.5
Hell Fest 4K/VU $5
Hell or High Water HD/VU $2.5
Hellboy (2019) HD/VU $3 or 4K/VU $4.5
Hercules (1997) HD/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $4
Hercules (2014) HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Here Comes the Boom HD/MA $3.5
Hidden Figures HD/MA $3
Hillsong: Let Hope Rise HD/IT $2
Hocus Pocus HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Home Alone HD/MA $3.5
Honey 2 HD/VU $3
Hop HD/MA or IT $3
Hope Springs HD/MA $2.5 or SD/MA $1
Hostiles HD/VU $3
Hot Fuzz HD/VU $4
Hotel Mumbai HD/MA $4
Hours (2013) HD/VU $4
How the Grinch Stole Christmas (2000) 4K/MA or IT $5 or HD/MA $3.5
How to be Single HD/MA $3
How to Train Your Dragon 2 HD/MA $2.5
How to Train Your Dragon HD/VU $3.5
How to Train Your Dragon Trilogy HD/MA $9
Hugo HD/VU or IT $3
Hunter Killer 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
I Can Only Imagine HD/VU $4
I Feel Pretty HD/IT $2
Ice Age HD/MA $3
Ice Age: Continental Drift HD/MA $3
In the Heights HD/MA $4 or SD/MA $2
Incredibles 2 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Independence Day Resurgence HD/MA $2.5
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom 4K/VU $5.5
Indignation HD/VU $4
Initiation 4K/VU $5
Inside Out HD/GP $2
Instant Family 4K/IT $3.5
Interstellar HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $5
Into the Woods HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Iron Man 2 HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5 or SD/IT $1.5
Iron Man 3 HD/GP $2
Iron Man HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
It Follows HD/VU $3.5
It's a Wonderful Life 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Jack and Jill HD/MA $3.5
Jack Reacher HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $4.5
Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Jacob's Ladder HD/VU $4
Jarhead 3: The Siege (Unrated) HD/IT $2.5
Jason Bourne HD/VU $2.5
Jason Statham 4-Film (War, Crank 1 & 2, Transporter 3) HD/VU $10
Jason Statham 6-Film (War, Crank 1 & 2, Bank Job, Wild Card, Transporter 3) HD/VU $14
Jaws HD/VU $3.5
Jay and Silent Bob Reboot HD/VU $3
Jersey Boys HD/MA $2.5
Jigsaw 4K/VU $4.5
Joe HD/VU $3.5
John Wick 1 & 2 Bundle HD/VU $4
John Wick 3 Parabellum 4K/VU $4.5
John Wick Chapter 2 HD/VU $3.5
John Wick HD/VU $2 or 4K/IT $2.5
John Wick Trilogy (Parabellum 4K) HD/VU $9
John Wick Trilogy 4K/VU $13
Jonah Hex HD/MA $4.5
Journey 2: The Mysterious Island HD/MA $3
Judy 4K/VU $5
Jungle Cruise HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Jurassic Park 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Jurassic World 5-Film Collection HD/MA $14
Jurassic World Fallen Kingdom HD/MA $3
Jurassic World HD/VU $2.5
Just Mercy HD/MA $3.5 or SD/MA $1.5
Justice (2017) HD/VU or IT $3
Justin Bieber: Never Say Never SD/IT $1.5
Kevin Hart: Let Me Explain HD/VU or IT $3
Kick-Ass 2 HD/MA $3.5
Kick-Ass 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Kidnap HD/VU or IT $2.5
Killer Elite HD/IT $3
Killerman HD/VU $4
Kin (2018) 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
King Kong (2005) 4K/MA or IT $5
Kingsman: The Golden Circle 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3
Kingsman: The Secret Service HD/MA $3.5
Kiss Kiss Bang Bang HD/MA $4.5
Kung Fu Panda 3 HD/MA $3
La La Land 4K/IT $3.5
Labor Day HD/VU or IT $3
Lady Macbeth HD/VU $4.5
Lara Croft Tomb Raider (2001) 4K/VU $5
Last Knights HD/VU $3.5 or SD/VU $1.5
Last Vegas HD/MA $3.5
Lawless HD/VU $4
Lawrence of Arabia (Restored) HD/MA $4
Leatherface HD/VU $4
Leprechaun 7-Film Collection HD/VU $12
Les Miserables (2012) HD/VU or IT $2
Let Me Explain HD/IT $2.5
Let's be Cops HD/MA $3.5
Life (2017) HD/MA $3.5
Life of Crime HD/VU $3.5
Light of My Life HD/IT $3.5
Like a Boss HD/VU $3.5
Lilo and Stitch 2: Stitch Has a Glitch HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Lincoln Lawyer 4K/VU $6.5 or HD/VU $4
Live by Night HD/MA $3
Logan HD/MA $3
Logan Lucky 4K/MA or IT $4.5
London Has Fallen HD/IT $3
Lone Survivor 4K/MA or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $2.5
Long Shot HD/VU $3.5
Looper HD/MA $3.5
Love and Monsters 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $4.5
Love the Coopers HD/VU or IT $4
Love, Simon HD/MA $3.5
Loving HD/VU or IT $3.5
Luca HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Lucy HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted HD/VU or IT $3
Madea's Witness Protection SD/IT $1.5
Maleficent 4K/MA $4 or HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Maleficent Mistress of Evil HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Mama HD/IT $3
Mamma Mia Here We Go Again HD/MA $2.5
Mandela: Long Walk to Freedom HD/VU $4
Mary Poppins (1964) HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Mary Poppins Returns HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Max HD/MA $3.5
Max Steel HD/IT $3
McKenna Shoots for the Stars HD/IT $2
Mechanic Resurrection HD/VU $2.5
Megan Leavey HD/VU or IT $3
Midnight Sun HD/MA $3.5
Midway 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Mile 22 HD/IT $3
Million Dollar Arm HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
MindGamers HD/MA or IT $3.5
Minions 4K/MA or IT $4.5 HD/VU $3
Misconduct HD/VU $2.5
Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children HD/MA $3
Mission: Impossible 4 Ghost Protocol HD/VU $2
Mission: Impossible 6 Fallout 4K/VU or IT $4.5
Mission: Impossible 6-film Set 4K/VU or IT $23 or HD/VU $17
Moana HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Moneyball HD/MA $3
Monkey Kingdom HD/MA $3
Monsters University HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Mortal Engines HD/MA $4
Mortal HD/VU $4
Mother! HD/VU $2.5
Mr. Poppers Penguins SD/IT $1.5
Much Ado About Nothing (2013) HD/VU $4
Mud HD/VU $2.5
Mulan (2020) HD/GP $2.5
Muppets Most Wanted HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Murder on the Orient Express HD/MA $3.5
My All American HD/MA or IT $3.5
Nebraska HD/VU $3
Nerve HD/IT $3.5
New Year's Eve HD/MA $2
News of the World HD/MA $4
Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb HD/MA $3
Nightmare Alley HD/GP $3.5
No Escape (2015) HD/VU $3
No Strings Attached HD/VU or IT $4
No Time to Die 4K/IT $4.5
Noah HD/VU or IT $2.5
Nobody's Fool HD/IT $2.5
Non-Stop HD/VU or IT $3
Norm of the North HD/VU $2.5
Nostalgia (2018) HD/MA $3.5
Now You See Me 2 HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Now You See Me HD/VU or IT $2.5 or SD/VU $1
Oblivion HD/MA $3.5
Occupation (2018) HD/VU $3.5
Occupation: Rainfall HD/VU $4
Office Christmas Party HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Olaf's Frozen Adventure HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
One Direction: This is Us SD/MA $1.5
Ong Bak 2 HD/VU $3
Onward HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Ouija HD/IT $3.5
Ouija: Origin of Evil HD/VU or IT $3.5
Our Brand is Crisis HD/MA $3.5
Outlander: Season 1 Vol 1 HD/VU $5.5
Overdrive HD/IT $2.5
Overlord 4K/IT $3.5
Oz the Great and Powerful HD/GP $2.5
Paddington HD/VU $3.5
Pain and Gain HD/VU or IT $3.5
Paranormal Activity 3 (Extended) HD/VU or IT $3
Paranormal Activity 4 HD/IT $2.5
Paranormal Activity HD/VU or IT $4
Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones HD/VU $3.5
Passengers HD/MA $3
Patriot Games 4K/VU $5
Patriot's Day HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 HD/MA $3.5
Penguins of Madagascar HD/MA $3.5
Pet Sematary (2019) 4K/IT $3.5
Pete's Dragon (2016) HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Philomena HD/VU $2.5
Pinocchio (1940) HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales HD/GP $2.5
Pitch Perfect 2 4K/MA $4 or HD/VU $2.5
Pitch Perfect HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Pixar Short Films Collection Vol. 3 HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Planes HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Planes: Fire and Rescue HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Playing with Fire HD/IT $2.5
Pocahontas HD/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $4
Point Break (2015) 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Power Rangers (2017) 4K/VU or IT $4.5
Precious HD/VU $4.5
Predator 4-Film Collection HD/MA $11
Premium Rush HD/MA $3.5
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies SD/MA $1.5
Primal HD/VU $3.5
Project Almanac HD/IT $3.5
Prometheus HD/MA $2.5
Punisher War Zone 4K/VU $5.5
Queen and Slim HD/MA $4
Ralph Breaks the Internet HD/GP $2
Rambo (2008) 4K/VU $5.5
Rambo 3 4K/VU $5.5
Rambo 5-Film Collection 4K/VU $23 or HD/VU $17
Rambo: First Blood Pt 2 4K/VU $5.5
Rambo: Last Blood 4K/VU $4.5
Rango HD/VU $3.5
Raya and the Last Dragon HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Reclaim HD/VU $3.5
RED 2 HD/VU $2
Red Dawn (2012) HD/IT $3
Red Riding Hood HD/MA $4
Red Sparrow HD/MA $3.5
Replicant (2001) HD/VU $3.5
Replicas HD/VU $3.5
Requiem for a Dream (Director's Cut) 4K/VU $5.5
Riddick (Unrated) HD/VU or IT $3
Ride Along HD/VU or IT $2.5
Rings HD/VU or IT $2.5
Riot HD/VU or IT $3
RIPD HD/VU or IT $2.5
Risen HD/MA $3
Robin Hood (1973) HD/MA $3.5 or HD/VU $3
Robocop (2014) HD/VU $2.5
Rocketman (2019) 4K/IT $4
Rogue One: A Star Wars Story HD/GP $2
Ron's Gone Wrong HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Rough Night 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Rugrats Go Wild HD/VU $4
Run All Night HD/MA $2
Runner Runner HD/MA $3.5
Rush HD/VU or IT $3
Safe HD/VU or IT $2.5
Saige Paints the Sky HD/IT $3
Same Kind of Different as Me HD/VU or IT $3
Samson HD/MA $3.5
Savages HD/IT $3
Saving Mr. Banks HD/GP $3
Saw HD/VU $3
Scarface HD/VU $4
Scary Movie 5 HD/VU $4.5
Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark 4K/VU $4.5
Schindler's List 4K/MA $5.5
Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse HD/IT $3
Scream (1996) HD/VU $4
Scream 2 4K/VU $5.5
Scrooged HD/IT $4
Selma HD/VU or IT $2.5
Serenity (2005) 4K/MA or IT $5.5
Shang-Chi Legend of the Ten Rings HD/GP $3
Sharp Objects HD/GP $2
Shaun the Sheep Movie HD/VU $3
Sherlock Gnomes HD/VU or IT $2.5
She's Having a Baby HD/VU $3.5
Shivers HD/VU $4
Siberia (2020) HD/VU $4
Sicario HD/VU $2.5
Side Effects HD/IT $3.5
Sing (2016) 4K/VU or IT $4.5
Singing in the Rain 4K/MA $5.5
Sinister HD/VU or IT $2.5
Sisters (Unrated) HD/IT $2.5
Skyfall HD/VU $2.5
Skyscraper HD/MA $3.5
Sleeping Beauty (1959) HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Sleepless HD/IT $2
Smurfs: The Lost Village HD/MA $3.5
Snatched HD/MA $2
Snitch HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3 or SD/VU or IT $1.5
Snow White and the Huntsman (Extended Edition) 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (1937) HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Solo: A Star Wars Story HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Some Kind of Wonderful HD/VU $3.5
Songbird 4K/IT $4.5
Sonic the Hedgehog HD/VU $3.5
Soul HD/GP $2.5
Southpaw HD/VU $3
Southside With You HD/VU $4.5
Spectre HD/VU $3.5
Spider-Man 4-Cut Set (Spider-Man 2 w/ Theatrical & Extended) HD/MA $11.5
Spider-Man 5-Cut Set (Spider-Man 2 & 3 w/ Theatrical & Extended) HD/MA $14.5
Spider-Man Far From Home HD/MA $3.5
Spider-Man Homecoming HD/MA $3
Spider-Man Homecoming/Far From Home Bundle HD/MA $6
Spider-Man No Way Home SD/MA $2
Spies in Disguise HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Spiral (2021) 4K/VU or IT $4.5
Split 4K/MA or IT $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Spongebob Sponge out of Water HD/IT $2.5
Spy (Unrated) HD/MA $3.5
St. Vincent HD/VU $3
Stand Up Guys HD/VU $3.5
Star Trek (2009) HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Star Trek 1-4 (Motion Picture, Wrath of Khan, Search for Spock, Voyage Home) 4K/VU $18
Star Trek Beyond HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Star Trek Into Darkness HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Star Wars The Force Awakens HD/GP $1.5
Star Wars The Last Jedi HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Star Wars The Rise of Skywalker 4K/MA $5 or HD/GP $2.5
Step Up: Revolution HD/IT $3
Straight Outta Compton (Theatrical and Unrated) 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Stronger HD/VU $4.5
Stuber 4K/MA $6
Suburbicon HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Succession Season 1 HD/IT $3.5
Suits Season 2 HD/IT $3.5
Sully HD/MA $3.5
Sundown: The Vampire in Retreat HD/VU $3.5
Super 8 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Super Buddies HD/GP $2
Sword in the Stone HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Ted (Unrated) HD/IT $3
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014) HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Terminator 2: Judgment Day (Extended) HD/VU $4.5
Terminator 2: Judgment Day 4K/VU $5
Terminator Dark Fate 4K/IT $3
Terminator Genisys HD/VU $2.5
That Awkward Moment SD/MA $1.5
The 15:17 to Paris HD/MA $3.5
The 33 HD/MA $2.5
The 5th Wave HD/VU $3
The Adventures Of TinTin HD/IT $2.5
The Amazing Spider-Man 2 HD/MA $4
The Amazing Spider-Man HD/MA $3.5 or SD/MA $1.5
The Art of Racing in the Rain HD/VU $4
The Avengers HD/GP $3
The Bank Job HD/VU $3.5
The Batman: The Complete Series (2000s) HD/VU $18
The BFG HD/MA $3.5
The Big Lebowski 4K/MA $6
The Big Short HD/VU or IT $3.5
The Big Wedding SD/IT $1
The Birth of a Nation HD/MA $3.5
The Blair Witch Project (1999) HD/VU $4
The Book of Life HD/MA $3.5
The Boss Baby HD/MA $3
The Bourne 5-Film Collection 4K/MA $22
The Bourne Identity HD/VU $3.5
The Bourne Legacy HD/VU $2
The Bourne Supremacy HD/VU $3.5
The Bourne Ultimatum 4K/MA $5.5
The Boy 2 HD/IT $3.5
The Boy HD/IT $3.5
The Butler HD/VU $3
The Butterfly Effect HD/MA $4
The Bye Bye Man (Unrated) HD/IT $2.5
The Cabin in the Woods 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $2.5
The Call of the Wild 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $2.5
The Case for Christ HD/IT $2.5
The Children (2008) HD/VU $4
The Collection HD/VU $3.5
The Commuter 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
The Cornetto Trilogy (Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz, World's End) 4K/MA $15
The Counselor HD/MA $4
The Courier 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
The Croods HD/VU $3.5
The Curse of La Llorona HD/MA $4
The D Train 4K/IT $4
The Dark Tower HD/MA $3.5
The Darkness HD/IT $3
The Descendants SD/IT $1.5
The Descent (Unrated) HD/VU $4
The Dilemma HD/VU $3.5 or SD/IT $1.5
The Doorman 4K/MA $5 or HD/VU $3.5
The Doors 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
The Duff SD/VU $1.5
The Edge of Seventeen HD/VU or IT $3
The Equalizer HD/MA $3
The Expendables 2 HD/VU or IT $1
The Expendables 3 (Theatrical) HD/VU $2 or 4K/IT $2.5
The Expendables 3 (Unrated) HD/IT $2.5
The Fast and the Furious 6-film Collection HD/VU $12.5 or (Fast 5 HD) 4K/IT $16
The Fast and the Furious 7-film Collection HD/VU $14 or (Fast 5 HD) 4K/IT $17
The Fast and the Furious 8-film Collection (9 Films) HD/MA $17.5
The Fast and the Furious 9-film Collection (11 Films) HD/MA $20
The Fast and the Furious HD/VU $3.5
The Fate of the Furious (Extended) HD/VU $2
The Fate of the Furious (Theatrical) HD/VU or IT $1.5
The Fault in Our Stars HD/MA $3.5
The Finest Hours HD/GP $3
The French Dispatch HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
The Frozen Ground (2013) HD/VU $3.5
The Gallows HD/MA $3
The Gambler HD/IT $3
The Gambler HD/VU $3
The Girl on the Train HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
The Girl With All The Gifts HD/VU $4
The Glass Castle 4K/VU $5.5
The Glorias 4K/VU $5
The Godfather Coda: Death of Michael Corleone HD/VU $4
The Good Dinosaur HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
The Good Lie HD/MA $3
The Greatest Showman HD/MA $3.5
The Green Mile 4K/MA $5.5
The Grey HD/VU or IT $3
The Guilt Trip HD/VU or IT $3
The Gunman HD/MA $3
The Hangover SD/IT $1.5
The Hateful Eight HD/VU $3.5
The Heat HD/MA $3
The Hitman's Bodyguard 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
The Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
The Homesman HD/VU $3
The Hundred-Foot Journey HD/MA $3.5
The Hunger Games 4-Film Collection HD/VU $8
The Hunger Games Catching Fire HD/VU $1.5 or 4K/IT $2 or SD/VU $.5
The Hunger Games HD/VU $1.5 or 4K/IT $2 or SD/VU $.0.5
The Hunger Games Mockingjay Part 1 HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3 or SD/VU $1
The Huntsman Winter's War (Extended) HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
The Hurricane Heist 4K/VU $5
The Incredibles HD/GP $3.5
The Internship SD/IT $1.5
The Intruder HD/MA $3
The Invisible Man (1933) HD/MA $3.5
The Invisible Man (2020) 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
The Jesus Music HD/VU $3.5
The Knick: Season 1 HD/IT $3.5
The Knick: Season 2 HD/IT or GP $3.5
The Last Airbender HD/VU $4.5
The Last Exorcism HD/VU $4
The Last Man (2019) HD/VU $4
The Last Stand HD/IT $2
The Last Witch Hunter HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
The Life of Pi 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA or IT $3.5
The Lion King (2019) HD/GP $2
The Lone Ranger HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
The Longest Ride HD/MA $3
The Longest Week HD/VU $3.5
The Lorax (1972) HD/MA $5
The Lorax HD/VU $3
The Lords of Salem HD/VU $4
The Lost World: Jurassic Park HD/MA $3
The Lucky One HD/MA $2.5
The Magnificent Seven (2016) HD/VU $3
The Man from U.N.C.L.E. HD/MA $4
The Man Who Shot Liberty Vance 4K/VU $5.5
The Martian (Extended) 4K/MA $6
The Martian HD/MA $3.5
The Matrix Resurrections HD/MA $4
The Meg HD/MA $3.5
The Monuments Men HD/MA $3.5
The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones HD/MA $3 or SD/MA $1.5
The Mule HD/MA $4
The Mummy (1999) HD/VU $4
The Mummy (2017) 4K/MA or IT $4.5
The Mummy Trilogy HD/MA $10
The NeverEnding Story HD/MA $4
The New Mutants HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
The Nice Guys HD/MA $3.5
The Nightmare Before Christmas HD/GP $3.5
The Nutcracker and the Four Realms HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
The Other Woman HD/MA $3
The Peanuts Movie HD/MA $3
The Perks of Being a Wallflower SD/VU or IT $1
The Poison Rose 4K/VU $4.5
The Possession HD/VU or IT $2.5
The Predator (2018) HD/MA $3
The Prodigy HD/VU $4
The Protector 2 SD/VU $1.5
The Punisher 4K/VU $5.5
The Purge HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
The Purge: Anarchy HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
The Purge: Election Year 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
The Quarry 4K/VU $5
The Resurrection of Gavin Stone HD/VU or IT $2.5
The Revenant HD/MA $3.5
The Santa Clause 2 HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
The Santa Clause 3 HD/MA $3
The Santa Clause HD/MA $3.5
The Santa Clause Trilogy HD/MA $9.5 or HD/GP $8
The Secret Life of Pets 4K/VU or IT $4.5
The Secret Life of Walter Mitty HD/MA $3
The Shack HD/IT $2.5
The Shallows HD/MA $3.5
The Shape of Water HD/MA $3.5
The Spy Who Dumped Me 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
The Star SD/MA $1.5
The Strangers: Prey at Night HD/MA $3
The Sum of All Fears 4K/VU $5.5
The Trust HD/VU $4
The Turning HD/MA $4
The Untouchables 4K/VU $5
The Upside HD/IT $3
The Vanishing (2018) HD/VU $4
The Voices (2014) HD/VU $4
The Vow SD/MA $1.5
The Walk HD/MA $3.5
The Way Back HD/MA $4
The Wedding Ringer HD/MA $3.5
The White Queen HD/VU $5.5
The Wolf of Wall Street HD/VU or IT $3.5
The Wolverine (Unrated) (w/Theatrical) HD/MA $4
The Wraith HD/VU $4
They Came Together HD/VU $4.5
This is 40 HD/MA $3.5
This Is Where I Leave You HD/MA $3.5
Thor Dark World HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Thor HD/GP $3.5 or SD/IT $1.5
Thor Ragnarok HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri HD/MA $3.5
Tomorrowland HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Tooth Fairy SD/IT $1.5
Top Gun (1986) 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Total Recall (1990) 4K/VU $5
Toy Story 2 HD/GP $3.5
Toy Story 4 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Toy Story HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Toy Story of Terror HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Toy Story that Time Forgot HD/MA $4
Transformers The Last Knight HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Transporter 3 SD/IT $1.5
Tremors A Cold Day In Hell HD/MA $2.5
Trolls HD/MA $2.5
Trumbo HD/IT $3.5
Turbo HD/IT $3
Twilight Breaking Dawn 2 HD/VU $1.5 or 4K/IT $2 or SD/VU $0.5
Tyler Perry's A Madea Christmas SD/VU $1.5
Tyler Perry's Madea's Witness Protection SD/VU $1
Tyler Perry's Temptation HD/GP $3
Unbreakable 4K/MA $5 or HD/GP $3.5
Unbroken HD/VU or IT $3
Uncle Drew HD/VU $3.5
Underworld: Awakening HD/MA $3
Unforgettable HD/MA $2.5
Unhinged HD/VU $3.5
V for Vendetta HD/MA $4
Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets HD/VU $3.5
Vampire Academy HD/VU $4
Van Helsing 4K/MA $5
Veep: Season 6 HD/IT $3.5
Venom HD/MA $3.5
Veronica Mars HD/MA $2.5
Victoria and Abdul HD/MA $4
Vivarium HD/VU $4
Walking with Dinosaurs HD/MA $3
War for the Planet of the Apes HD/MA $3
War Room SD/MA $1.5
Warcraft HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Warm Bodies 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5 or SD/VU $1.5
Warrior 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Werewolf: The Beast Among Us (Unrated) HD/IT $3.5
West Side Story (2021) HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
What Men Want HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
What to Expect When You're Expecting SD/IT $1.5
When the Game Stands Tall HD/MA $3 or SD/MA $1.5
Whisky Tango Foxtrot HD/IT $3
White House Down HD/MA $3.5
Why Him? HD/MA $3
Widows HD/MA $3.5
Wild Card HD/VU $3
Wild HD/MA $3.5
Willow HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Wilson HD/MA $3.5
Winchester HD/VU $3.5
Winter's Tale HD/MA $2
Wonder HD/VU $3
Wonder Park 4K/IT $2.5
Wonder Woman 1984 4K/MA $5.5
Woodlawn HD/IT $3.5
World War Z HD/VU or IT $2.5
Wrath of the Titans HD/MA $2.5
X-Men Apocalypse HD/MA $3
X-Men Days of Future Past HD/MA $3
XXX Return of Xander Cage HD/VU $2 or 4K/IT $2.5
Yogi Bear SD/IT $1.5
You Were Never Really Here HD/VU $4
You're Next HD/VU $3.5
Z for Zachariah HD/VU $4
Zeros and Ones HD/VU $4.5
Zootopia HD/GP $2.5

I hope by writing this, somewhere, someone out there will benefit and see this as something they can relate to. Through my 4 year struggle with panic disorder, I always looked to reddit, ted talks, or youtube. I never however, looked at therapy or medicine to help me out for reasons I am about to explain.
I am going to begin with how it all started in high school, I was the "popular athlete" and even made jokes about people suffering with anxiety. My girlfriend at the time could never take a test inside a classroom and instead had to go to an empty space where she would even struggle there. She said she had texting anxiety and I just kept making fun of her because I would say "everyone gets anxious for a test its not special". Short and simple for my high school experience, I was a bit of an ass. My senior year during a basketball game I broke down, I had no clue what was happening. I went straight to the ER believing I was having a heart attack, they tested me for everything and let me go saying everything was fine. I couldn't believe it, they must've missed something?
For the next couple months I went doctor to doctor believing there was something physical, just to be shut down every time. I missed the rest of my season, and my upcoming track season. It was a process of hell and back, everyday waking up hoping that something would just change, little did I realize me hoping for a day to magically appear and me to go back to "normal" was putting me into a tormenting cycle.
I then had to get ready for college, after suffering and suffering, eventually after nearly a year and a half I was able to come to the conclusion that I was having panic attacks, all by myself online through hours and hours of research everyday. I didn't want to believe it however because once again, I didn't believe in these things.
So now, as I am in college I began to freak out at the fact even more that it was all "mental" and not physical at all. I felt trapped in an endless cycle which then caused me to have agoraphobia, and at the time it made me feel better to hide away from others when I felt panicky, because I wasn't going to make a fool of myself.
I grew up in a family with a military father, and a mother who had the same beliefs of mental illness being something you can just tell your brain to shut out. It made me not seek any medical help or any medicine in fear that I would make them feel ashamed of me.
Long story short, after failing everything, after drinking away all my nights to hide the pain, I broke down when I came back home. I cried and cried and cried, and went to an online doctor that prescribed me lexapro. I'd like to point out that before this break down I tried everything natural, but was not religiously following these things.
If I didn't drink for a week, worked out, meditated, ate good, saw the sun for hours a day, then I would feel great going to bed at night and believe it was all gone, however every morning when I woke up I dreaded having to face these fears. Every single one of them was a challenge, I was scared of not having an escape from drinking, scared of how I would get to the gym and not panic, and trying not to panic while working out as my heartrate skyrocketed. Meditation was hard because I couldn't sit still, seeing the sun was difficult because I felt like my world was constantly spinning whenever I was outside in the open.
Eventually I took my lexapro, prescribed at 10mg and was expected to raise to 20mg. I decided to attempt it at 5mg.
After 2 months on 5mg lexapro, I can safely say that it can only account for probably 20% of my success, but it was a beautiful stepping stone into just being a tad bit less anxious.
I know this because in order for me to hope for it to work, I stopped drinking for a month, which led me to being more active and content with myself, which led to me being more successful in school, and people proud of me again.
After the second month mark I began drinking again, knowing that this was a horrible idea I still could not be ready to give up my social life as a fraternity member. It is basically instilled in us in this society that not drinking is bad, and especially in a group of guys that all love to crack open a beer and talk about their lives I knew I had to somehow fit it back into my lifestyle.
I went on a week long bender for spring break, did not take my lexapro at all, and let me say I did completely hate my life for a few days after as the brutal hangover was tearing me apart, alot of my progress that I made in the gym felt gone, I felt disgusting and ashamed, but interestingly enough I didn't have a single panic attack, even when my whole life felt it was falling apart.
I'm going to cut this short because I can ramble and ramble, but basically my life is one that is comparable to any other person now, somehow remarkably all the fear I have had has managed to subside, I even chuckle a little bit whenever I think "oh my gosh what if i panic". It sort has become something that I just laugh at because of how many years of my life it took away from me, kind of like if you were to get a text message from your ex that broke your heart saying she wanted to get back with you.
Did I mention my lexapro has given me zero side effects? zero. drinking was not affected, no problems with sex, no feeling down, just an overall feeling of hope that has snowballed into a new life.
I wish everyone that deals with this a great recovery, because trust me, through time you will find a solution as long as you keep moving forward. Whether it be naturally, or through medication, you will find some route that works for you.
Just remember never give yourself the title of someone that has "panic disorder", if it limits you multiple times through recovery, so be it, its a whole learning experience. I know that I am not completely free of "panic attacks" and will have probably many many more, but just knowing it will only strengthen me through time has given me a smile that I can hold with me through the harsh times.
Also, journal. journal. journal. Especially with the agoraphobia aspect of it all, whenever I accomplish something massive such as taking a test in a classroom, where I am stuck in one spot for hours at a time, it immediately goes into a journal and continues my snowball forward. It started with simple things such as being able to drive in an open spot, and has snowballed so far ahead as to where I can sit for hours in a public space without even thinking about it.
You will still have times of worrying about being stuck in the situations that you feared before, it will take hundreds of times until I believe that fear goes away, but just think of it as how you train your body physically. You won't be the massive guy in the gym after just a few months, instead it takes years of dedication and motivation.
Don't give up, the bright side is right there.
One last thing: Find a song that relates to your situation, use it as fuel. Mine was "better days" by Dermot Kennedy. After years of listening to this beautiful song, I sometimes love to just put it on at night and it immediately brings back all the beautiful accomplishments I have achieved.
Love you all, Love eachother, this is a special community that have a blessing in disguise, all it takes is hope and eachother.

Today, we will start the final page of the Fever Part 1 Diary book. We did this bible study in two parts because we found that we had A Lot of things to discuss when it came to the simple question of 'what is happening on the page?', so we will be back next week with the second part.
Join us as we dive into Z Outro: Into the New World!
---

01: What are your thoughts on the page?

GD: We have a very tight 2 and half hours we need to work in today, which I think will be fine? Because it's not a member. But maybe that's worse. idk. The good news is we're on the reading practice which for sure takes the longest.
BobbyJ: Excellent. Only good news. I don't have my bible study chai latte but I have remembered to start the playlist.
GD: I'm already feeling destined for disaster; I'm halfway through reading this
BobbyJ: Let the disaster begin
GD: My first thought is wow this really does all come out of nowhere. We've been in a classic coming of age story for 7 weeks, and now we're switching genres a bit.
BobbyJ: It's interesting that he implies they made an active decision to split up. So it wasn't gradual.
But it seems they tried to keep in touch but then gradually faded away from one another. I'm confused about the timing
GD: Are we to assume this is Hongjoong based on the diary film?
BobbyJ: Yes, plus the mention of losing his family
GD: So the line about "our dream of being together have become like shackles holding us down"--that line in particular makes me wonder back to some of the other stuff we've talked about
BobbyJ: Right.
GD: Specifically, Wooyoung wanted to dance and there's talk of big companies, and Yunho wanting to achieve his brothers dream seemingly through music, and Hongjoong wanted to be a star. We know there is overlap in those dreams, but they don't all have to be achieved in the same way, and it feels like this is the fall-out of that. The thinking that the dream of achievement was important instead of the dream of achieving it together. I'm specifically reminded of Wooyoung running back to the warehouse in his diary film
BobbyJ: So you think the core problem wasn't all the pressure but that they weren't trying to stay together hard enough? It's wild that Halajoong jumps from "You decided to give up on your dreams" right to "many dimensions and many realities". It feels as though he's talking about two different things--but what if he isn't? What if one thought does lead right to the next
GD: You'll need to say more
BobbyJ: I would except it's a genuine question to which I do not have an answer
GD: My thoughts are thinking
BobbyJ: Perhaps it's not so much a rapid switch in topic but more like a "you're focusing on the wrong problem!"
GD: What if what halajoong is trying to say is that 'you were blinded by the thought that this is all there is, and that's what made you give up your dreams because you're too focused on all the little things here. but really, there's so much more--more dimensions and different realities--etc.'
BobbyJ: Right right--like these little dreams of stardom are so small compared to what you were destined to do
GD: And also, a little ‘you gave up the most important bit for what? When you already had it all?’ Because I do think an overarching theme of ateez is that being together and doing what you love together trumps everything else
BobbyJ: Yes, the togetherness was the thing. The music was the vehicle
GD: And I think at least some of them lost sight of that–which led to the eventual separation. Each step for their own personal growth and chances at stardom became a step away from each other, instead of walking on that path together.
BobbyJ: I'm thinking about San though. All he really wanted was the togetherness
GD: Was he even there though? His problem was that his parents wanted to move--perhaps they moved him, perhaps the lynch pin of the togetherness wasn't really there to hold them together. We've talked about his problem wasn't really one he could solve.
BobbyJ: That makes me so sad. But it makes sense. And if I were to write out this whole narrative with the details we're lacking that's what I'd do.
GD: We don't know of course--but there's also no reason to think he was there. You know?
BobbyJ: Speaking from experience, typically when your parents tell you you're moving, you have at most a couple months before the time comes
GD: And we had these boys who were... sort of only loosely connected? Yeosang, Mingi, San--they don't ever express a dream for music in the same way that the OG group does, and even Jongho to a lesser extent. The ultimate falling out may have been a question of what the OG group decided to do after everyone else had left.
BobbyJ: Right. I don't see Mingi coming back for a vote after Jongho punches him. And Hongjoong doesn't say they ALL decided, just "we decided"
GD: I feel like as we've read, it's been pretty clear that there was an og group that were working towards a thing. The others drifted in and appeared to want the same thing, but maybe not to the same extent or in the same way? And it always felt like they could drift back out again. In fact, at least Yeosang and Mingi were almost destined to drift back out
BobbyJ: Yeah, Hongjoong, Hwa, Woo and Yunho had no real reason to leave. They didn't have the same pressures the others seemed to face
GD: It's a mystery to me what Hwa decided to do in this intervening time as he left--but in many ways Yunho and Wooyoung leaving Hongjoong makes a lot of sense to me.
BobbyJ: Perhaps he relapsed, became super busy again
GD: It's hard to break bad habits
BobbyJ: Feels like we're going heavy on the conjecture today. But the entry gives us very little to work with. But also so much
GD: There is a lot that is left out to explain how we've gotten here. And for the narrative to make sense, you almost have to offer something. Because our last entry is Jongho being like "oh no this is my dream. I'm dreaming again." And then very suddenly, everyone is like peace, and just leaves Hongjoong alone.
BobbyJ: It's just so unclear how much time has passed.
GD: Either a year or only a couple of months. Yunho's entry has always seemed like the spring to me, but I guess it could just as reasonably be the fall.
BobbyJ: The line "Even if, not often, the promises we made were pushed back day by day and we forgot about each other." It seems to suggest that after the break up they tried to keep in touch somehow? Or am I entirely misinterpreting it. The vibe I get is that everyone became very busy walking down their separate paths once again but meant to get together to catch up
GD: I think that's right. I was just looking at the times of year because this we know happens in the summer.
BobbyJ: Yes. In the first entry he says "It was the moment before we opened that door". But things are fine in the first entry. But if, for instance, a whole year had gone by, would it still be the moment before?
GD: So I decided to bust out papago as one does and see how that line was about the moment before opening the door was translated by a robot.
BobbyJ: I have a few translation questions actually
GD: "This is a moment on the other side of the door, which we have not yet opened, before we make promises of compromise and tameness." Which is mostly the same, but it does make me think that "the other side of the door" is the outside world, which is maybe not how I originally read it. In which case "It was the moment before we opened that door" would mean, as soon as they started trying to go do things in the outside world, that's when everything changed.
BobbyJ: So, the original journal isn't talking about opening the door to other worlds at all? And the compromises and tameness refers to what they would become when they split up.
GD: I think that's a reasonable interpretation?
BobbyJ: Completely changes the foreshadowing
GD: Yes.. I think that's right. They're almost playing with the idea of worlds under this interpretation?
Because Hongjoong is like "our world" and the "adult world" in this first page and Halajoong is like "you dumbass".
BobbyJ: But he's thinking way too small
GD: Right
BobbyJ: That's actually so much more clever than we thought. I don't give the journals enough credit for their subtleties
GD: I think because of various translation inaccuracies and confusing translations, people tend to write them off as being poorly written when that's just simply not true
BobbyJ: It's our fault for not knowing Korean
GD: Absolutely. I also think they're going for a very lyrical and poetic delivery, which makes it even harder to translate and maintain the same poeticness
BobbyJ: Very true.
GD: The translation can come off as almost... corny isn't the word... but like, simple? and sort of obvious? That's also not the right word. But I think if you sit with it and think about it, you can see some of the lovely metaphor and literary elements that don't necessarily jump out when you're just reading the translation through as if it's a story. Anyways, I have two thoughts:
One, did they go back in time when Hongjoong flipped the cromer? I always assumed they went back in time when Yeosang broke the cromer, but did they actually go back in time here before ending up in Strictland. Because the guys don't appear in the warehouse, they open the door and walk in. Which must mean that they are in their own world when Hongjoong flips it and they arrive there. And the only way to explain all of them together at the warehouse is if they went back in time to when they were all together at the warehouse. Otherwise, the cromer has some additional, unexplained powers
BobbyJ: I have long had that same question
GD: Two, I've forgotten my second thought because I got so distracted by my first
BobbyJ: I've always wondered if Ateez are meant to have some special connection to the cromer. Because when they walk in they all seem puzzled which seems to mean that they are all aware something strange has happened. The rest of the members weren't even there when Hongjoong activated. So it seems only they are affected by it. If Hongjoong had traveled back in time by himself to when the other members were all still around, they wouldn't think anything of it. Also what happens to the original timeline if they have traveled to the past? Is Strictland actually an alternate timeline?
GD: Let me just…
We know that when they come back to their world, they come back in the past
BobbyJ: Was it really the past or was it a different timeline? Had the cromer been stolen in the original timeline?
GD: Well we've talked before about what the difference is between alternate timelines and alternate worlds. When they say that there are many worlds and realities, is what they mean that there are many branching timelines? And that basically, it is a oneteez situtation because they are all just different timeline versions of themselves. Have you seen Everything Everywhere All at Once?
BobbyJ: Yes
GD: So, like that. I do plan to rewatch that movie tonight no matter what
BobbyJ: All the time travel stories that make the most sense to me include multiple versions of the mc existing alongside themselves. I just finished reading The 7 1/2 Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle and it's a time loop murder mystery. The mc relives the same day over and over simultaneously to all his other iterations. But with Ateez, when they travel back and forth, there seems to be only Hala and Ateez. Like when they travel to the past and Yunho's brother is alive, what happens to the Yunho that was already there?
GD: Right..
BobbyJ: This is why I like a oneteez theory
GD: I guess my main problem is oneteez or infiniteteez, but twoteez is terrible for the reasons you stated, basically
BobbyJ: Because what I think is that Yunho of the past was away from his brother. Yunho from the future goes to the past and causes the chain reaction that leads to his brother dying
GD: It's not that I hate that. Well I was developing thoughts but I'm instead going to put a pin in Yunho's brother's death so that we can discuss this page
BobbyJ: It makes sense to save it for when it actually happens.
GD: I will say the "puzzled face" makes me think this must be current timeline but that gives me way more questions than.... anything
BobbyJ: Oneteez answers a lot of questions for me in general. But it doesn't answer the question of how the cromer affects Ateez the way it does.
GD: Ah, I remembered my second thought: "follow your heart, the map is there". It's not a thought. It's a sentence. I guess my thought is, map to answer, we should read answer
BobbyJ: We should always read Answer. Answer is the answer. Right now or do a sacred reading?
GD: Perhaps both–I am already pulling it up though
BobbyJ: When can the cromer communicate in dreams?
GD: "Shouting out that the end means the beginning" --that is technically true here. The end was the beginning of their adventure with the cromer. I do not remember the cromers powers because I'm a bad clown
BobbyJ: It's in one of the Fever Road episodes I think. Will google know I wonder. It does not. But apparently it is possible to communicate with someone who is dreaming.
GD: "The scorching sun melted away even our dream of youth" from the book to "the burning sun, and the huge wave, are nothing for us" in answer.
BobbyJ: Oh no if you google "Ateez cromer powers" one of my old very wrong theory posts pops up
GD: Hilarious
BobbyJ: Crescent moon. Okay hold up.
GD: I am fascinated by them using the idea of heat as both a hard and violent thing and a passionate and exciting thing. Sorry I was deep in my sun thoughts. I shall hold
BobbyJ: If the cromer delivers messages during the crescent moon and travels dimensions on the full moon, then how is it doing both at the same time on this page?
GD: Perhaps they went back in time first to a nice date with a full moon and then traveled dimensions. No a lot about the cromer is unexplained here
BobbyJ: Maybe it was a crescent moon in strictland but a full moon in the real world since halajoong is the one who activated it
GD: There is no reason for it to call the rest of the boys together, regardless of anything else, so the whole thing feels like something more is going on than just the cromer
BobbyJ: This is a very interesting game dynamic. Like they would have to travel to a specific moon phase in order to speak through dreams but wouldn't be able to get back until the moon changed again. Or can the cromer always travel through time?
GD: Depends on whether you think time is different than dimensions
BobbyJ: HJ has hinted that the cromer has other powers based on other phases of the moon/eclipses
GD: Perhaps it can always travel through time in the dimension it's currently in
BobbyJ: Have we looked up the state of the moon on July 29, 2016?
GD: I'm almost positive I have and sent you a moon chart but lets do it again: waning crescent
BobbyJ: Yet another reason to work on our PhD presentation. I wonder if the waxing and waning have any effect.
Okay. I can't with the Cromer right now. Let's go back to your thought about the heat
GD: The july full moon happened on the 19th in that year which probably means less than nothing. I had a wild thought that the next comeback would be on May 5th because that's when the full moon in May is, and the 5th is a Friday. but I'm just going to put that thought away. omg there's a lunar eclipse on May 5th too (editor addition: this has all been proven wildly wrong because ATEEZ will be in Japan on May 5th)
BobbyJ: Where? In Korea?
GD: Apparently it will be completely visible over Asia
BobbyJ: Huh. Would be wild. So they'd have a concert right in the middle of comeback build up
GD: I assumed they would announce the comeback at the concert, and then it would take place end of May, start of June. But you know, they always do insane things
BobbyJ: That's what made the most sense to me. I expected more secret videos and qr shenanigans
GD: And they've definitely performed shows/special things while doing comeback promotions, so it wouldn't be the craziest thing. In some ways, it's good promo? But still feels a little too close.
BobbyJ: This means we should be expecting an announcement in a few weeks
GD: If we don't have an announcement by end of March, I'd say we're good to assume it's not May 5th
but.. truly does a more perfect date exist for them?
BobbyJ: Well, nothing to do but wait and see. Okay back to your fire thought Do they do the same with waves? Are waves ever portrayed as good?
GD: Not waves.. but water maybe? We'd have to peruse the lyrics and bibles more
BobbyJ: Even in Wave, the waves aren't good--they represent trials and struggles, hard times
GD: I just know that when they use fire and water imagery, it's not as if the water is putting out the flames. I'm thinking of Inception and Deja Vu a little bit. But I don't remember them ever saying water=good necessarily
BobbyJ: I'm trying to draw a line from the burning sun to burning passion. Halajoong seems to say that it wasn't their lack of passion that tore them apart--but maybe that their passion wasn't directed at the right things? Or something like passions burning you up from the inside if they have nowhere to go? It's interesting that he mentions that there hadn't been rain
GD: The idea of balance is coming to me
BobbyJ: I don't know if that's just to emphasize how hot it was or if there's something else there
GD: I was thinking about it when I was thinking about them dancing in Inception with the fire above and water below
BobbyJ: Yeah, I was thinking about temperance. Like, the two temper each other?
GD: I have this idea that you need both--and it's taking me back to our earlier conjecture about San, and also something that Hongjoong has said about Wooyoung . For a group to survive, you do have to have a person who cares a lot about the groups survival--a person for whom that is the top priority
BobbyJ: And that was probably San in the story
GD: I feel strongly that he was. Passions can't just go around being untethered; you need that sort of anchor bit. Like, extend it out even. We use water to not just put fires out but to help control them. Water can make the heat bearable. When you have a fever, you're to drink water so you don't die. You need both water and warmth to survive.
BobbyJ: So what does water symbolize? What's the thing that keeps passions in check?
GD: I feel like it's something around togetherness, but I don't quite know. Like, connection? Water connects things?
BobbyJ: Maybe? Like rivers are pathways to other places. Wait I'm remembering something from other bible study. There was something about rivers. Yunho? The Han River?
GD: Yes yes that does sound familiar. Oh! And wooyoung
No, I made up the Wooyoung thing, but yes to Yunho and the Han river
BobbyJ: There's an implication that Wooyoung also performed by the Han River like the others
GD:I think because he talks about "street performance" but that does give some implication that a river is a gathering place.. a place to see other people
BobbyJ: I feel like Tea may have made a relevant comment
GD: Tea, our best congregant. Is congregant a word?
BobbyJ: It is now

Re: the clownery on rivers, I'm reminded of the significant(?) role of a river elsewhere in the lore. "The tears and sweat we shed comes back to a river, and it pulls us to this vast world"1 Which I feel supports the "river is movement, change, and also a symbol of The Outside" thing you have going here.
1 Outro: Over The Horizon 0:22 (gotta source my shit like a real book study right? lol)

GD: Oh shit. A great comment
BobbyJ: I was thinking of water as trials. Tears and sweat leading to the river; the waves are trials that have to be overcome
GD: Interesting
BobbyJ: It makes sense I think? That our passions are tempered when we face struggle.
GD: Other mentions of water: drowning in Jongho's entry, crying in the first entry, arguably snow in Hwa's
BobbyJ: The trials burn away the fluff, the stuff that's not important
GD: Turbulence, waterfall
BobbyJ: Or rather, wash away the fluff, to not mix my metaphors. I wonder how this works with my color algebra. I will not attempt to figure out right now
GD: What did we say blue was?
BobbyJ: We didn't know. That's where the algebra came in
GD: We said blue was hope, according to our conversation
BobbyJ: So we basically didn't know
GD: Not hope. We said longing. Blue was longing
BobbyJ: Hmm. I would like to put pins in both those things
GD: Yes. The movement of water, and the idea that water is connecting them back to the rest of the world, does work with the idea that perhaps water has both a good and bad role to play in their imagery just like the idea that the sun does. Temperance, as you said, which means I think we should continue to look for references to both. In the future, not now.
BobbyJ: I have one last question for now. He says "I fell asleep in the hideout where no one was looking for him" Is that meant to say no one was looking for me? As in actually I'm all alone and there was no man in a mask here talking to me?
GD: I think it does mean "me", like a "no one ever looks for me, I am alone, it was wishful thinking that someone would be talking to me." So like a way to highlight his aloneness. Because the next sentence talks about his lonely heart. It's hard to come to what else him could be referring to. I guess halajoong said that he didn't have much time--so maybe it could be saying that there was no one else there looking for halajoong--but that seems wrong to me.
BobbyJ: Yeah, it doesn't quite make sense. Unless it's like "was anyone else here to see that?" but still feels off
GD: It would be a strange thing for Hongjoong to think unless it's somehow wishful thinking? Like, he momentarily forgets he's alone in the warehouse--just like we have Wooyoung sort of momentarily forget there's no one waiting for him int he warehouse--and is like, oh no, it's just me no one else sees this. I still don't think that's right though.
But a thought just occurred to me: Wooyoung must've only metaphorically run back to the warehouse that day (which is what I thought then too) because I don't think Hongjoong ever left.I think if something hadn't dragged Hongjoong out of warehouse, he'd still be sitting in there basking in his aloneness, which is fascinating. He seems the one most deflated from the prior entry.Like, he had one of the strongest internal motivations at the start, and he's now very sulky and alone, and I do believe he'd stay in the warehouse alone
BobbyJ: I'm just filling in some narrative gaps. Yeo claims that his father kicked them out of the warehouse. So, perhaps he's the one who chained up the doors. But it's an old warehouse, there have to be other entrances for Hongjoong to slip into. It's possible that Woo does come running back but is deterred by the chained doors not knowing that Hongjoong is still inside
GD: But they're all able to just walk in in this entry, no chains to be found? Which is odd. Unless we're to assume Hongjoong eventually removed the chains
BobbyJ: Or they did all travel back in time
GD: I think they traveled back in time. And that would be confusing so they would have puzzled looks. I don't know that I believe it strongly and am ready to fight for time travel. But I do lean more towards it than other explanations of how they all came to be here
BobbyJ: Time travel doesn't even explain how they are all summoned. We know in the future Yeo gets left behind by the cromer. So. . . idk
GD: They'd have to basically snap back into their bodies and retain their memories? I also don't know
BobbyJ: These are the questions Hongjoong should have been answering in his Q&A
GD: I sent all of these questions to him but he was busy giving me rudimentary details I could've found on my own.
BobbyJ: I firmly believe he didn't answer any actual Atiny questions. No Atiny in their right mind would actually wonder if Ateez and Halateez have similar positions
GD: Well I didn't need him, anyways. I needed the intern to answer my questions. When will they let her give her lore chat?
BobbyJ: We've finally gotten an acknowledgement of her existence. baby steps I guess
--
We will be back next week to finish off our discussion of the Fever Diary 1! Let us know what you think about this page or how the narrative is coming together thus far.

Context - This is the forty-fourth of many blog posts where I share the stories of my travels to people interested and for my future self to read back. This post is about my West Africa journey and my last week spent in Freetown, Sierra Leone!
One of my favourite things so far about Freetown was actually how the impoverished locals would go about asking for money. Instead of just nagging and attempting to guilt you, they would actually do the opposite and hype you up by calling you names such as, “Bigger boss”, “Commander”, “Celebrity”, “Look at you”, “Legendary” or “Mr. Legend!” With their accent and slang way of saying the words, I couldn’t help but at least give ‘em a smile.
With my Ghana visa approved, I sold my GoPro and bought a flight ticket to Accra. I reckoned it would be best to finish up with Ghana, Togo and Benin before starting to make my way back home for Christmas.
I knew I’d have to return to West Africa eventually, so I was in no rush to push and get it all done at once. Especially now, with new friends in Freetown, I was already looking forward to it.
The chaotic streets with corrupt cops and wild keke (tuktuk) drivers kept me well alert and entertained. It’s definitely not a place for everyone but I think that’s even another reason why I liked it.
Eddie managed to find a drone for me to borrow so, when we weren’t at his new bar preparing for opening day, we were out taking photos or seeing the city from above. As a way of saying thank you for all the food, drives and overall amazing experiences, I offered to take photos during the Hallowe’en party since he wouldn’t accept any cash. He agreed but once it was finished, I ended up with another gig the following night and even a fair amount of USD! On top of that, during the party itself I met some incredible people who made the time fly by. Talk about a win-win-WIN situation.
With an early rise we stopped for some food at a Lebanese coffee shop. I found it interesting how the different groups of foreigners would create their own communities and complexes to live in, with housing, sports facilities and restaurants. Whether it’s Chinese or Lebanese, it just seems like it was human nature for them to try and make it feel like home no matter where they end up. I wondered what the locals think? Is there one group they prefer over the other? Both questions I’d eventually get around to asking but with varied responses and different opinions, I just ended up with more questions than I started with.
Anway, meeting us at the shop were two Sierra Leonean/ Americans that I’d met the night before and after the quick stop, we got right to heading South. Just as before, I really enjoyed the drive through the countryside but this time we made sure to stop along the way and fly the drone or even take photos with Rami’s Toyota Landcruiser!
At the beach house, we played football, ate fresh seafood and even took the boat to explore a nearby island. Don’t get me wrong, this was all amazing but the highlight for me that day came later in the afternoon when I began to hear a distant chanting.
Not more than 50 metres down the coastline was a quickly growing group of villagers that seemed to be…”partying? Is that money they’re throwing? What the…?” I asked out loud in confusion. Eddie laughed and told me that It’s a tradition. Whenever a new fishing boat is ready, they all join in to help get it in the water. They sing certain songs and take small breaks in between each heave to share a moment of celebration. Some will stand in the boat and throw cash up in the air while others look for a spot along the thick ropes to join in for the next haul.
Intrigued, I quickly grabbed my camera and began making my way over. I kept a bit of distance at first and just watched but it didn’t take long before they began waving, smiling and signalling for me to come over. “Welcome Opotho!” (White man) “Snap no problem,” they would say pointing to my camera that until then had been turned off.
With a small congregation of curious children gathering around, they all posed with peace signs and tried to shuffle their way into every photo. “Snap me Opotho, snap me!” I couldn’t help but laugh.
After watching the final push of the boat and having a small conversation with an older man about life in the village, the sun was beginning to set, so I headed back to the house.
That evening, after returning from Tokeh, we went to another Hallowe’en party at a different spot. Again, I got a gig taking some photos but I wasn’t as well received this time. Yet, I don’t blame ‘em for being a bit sceptical of a tourist lookin’ white guy with his camera. I still managed to have a good time though and got it done, no problems at all.
Catching up on sleep was at the top of my list for the following morning, as well as finishing up the photos from the night before. It was a quiet day alone in the apartment which I didn’t mind after a non-stop weekend. It gave me time to reflect and recall everything as I journaled down the past few days with my vague memory.
As I originally planned, I headed over to hang with Rami and a few guys, play some FIFA and eat some homemade smash burgers for dinner. It felt a lot like home. I guess some things are the same no matter where in the world you are. To end off the day, Tito and I worked out one final time concluding our fitness boot camp and my last night in Freetown.
I took my time in the morning to get ready and thanked everyone for everything they’d done. Eddie offered to drive me to the ferry terminal and just like that I was on my way. Another goodbye in the books.

hidey ho folks
let's talk dreams 🍃 and their importance to your future
and to start, today I'll share a bit about some of the dreams / visions / astral travels in which I've been blessed to participate these last few weeks (truth be told, more like decades)
I believe it can be very important to remember your dream upon awakening .. to journal and discuss your dreams whenever you can; writing down you anything and everything you recall, using your best active vocabulary words .. this better solidifies the 'event' in your memory
and once you have a routine of this process, you'll begin to see the patterns
see, dreams play out in kind of a sequential manner, because they're advancing you through a storyline as you advance through your lifeline
like, in this dream of mine, the location is generally the same: a beautiful, luminescent silvery blue gray, like you see on large, coastal waterways around late afternoon to sunset .. it's as if the waters are shimmering, brimming with liquid metal 🔥 and with a brilliance only higher energies could create
sometimes it's felt as if I'm on a beach or within a very large, flat wetland that is bordered all around with a few ancient stone homes and wooden cottages off in the distance .. other times, it's been a more modern feel of a very large commercial conference venue yet on some remote tropical island 🏝️
usually, there is no horizon .. no 'line' differentiating a sky above or a terrain below .. and no end to anything at all in sight
there is never a sun, per se, yet the entire landscape is illuminated with an intense yet diffused light and, similar to when I meditate and travel up to the stars, there is no temperature yet you're exceptionally comfortable
all that said 🌱🕊️🫧 the activities taking place in this serene location feels as if it's a conference of sorts and THIS time, everyone who has gathered now knows what they're to do and are simply enjoying each others company 🙏 they're all just so content to be together, including me
over the last weeks, it's gone from giving me the sense that we're performing our 'preparations' to a genuine feel of an upcoming completion of activities
my interpretation of these as of late: there IS a rise in global collective consciousness .. which IS happening real time .. and WILL be the catalyst for the event which will 'begin the cleansing process' as to what, where or when that event is, I have zero knowledge nor inclination to espouse an opinion lol
but NO ONE can deny that the Truth is finally being told, to more and more every day .. and more importantly, is being heard now by millions who were deaf for so very long 😔
can't believe I'm about to say this out loud
however it's absolutely a really cool time to be alive, guys .. shit show and all, we're going to bear witness so a new cosmic creation celebration unlike anyone's ever seen
I M H O: the world will indeed, be cleansed once again, and this will happen within most of our lifetimes .. and those with eyes wide open will continue forward who chose to live small, sober and vigilant live minimally and mindfully
and remained pure of heart
and that means: those will, most likely, be the children .. rather than those of us old enough to have become jaded haha 🤣 don't worry, there's still time for everyone to focus on the good and ignore the bad .. oh, and be kind .. and maybs we 'non kids' can jump in alongside the others
it's really that simple 🙂
peace to you, dear friend

hidey ho folks 🌹
let's talk dreams 🍃 and their importance to your future
and to start, today I'll share a bit about some of the dreams / visions / astral travels in which I've been blessed to participate these last few weeks (truth be told, more like decades)
I believe it can be very important to remember your dream upon awakening .. to journal and discuss your dreams whenever you can; writing down you anything and everything you recall, using your best active vocabulary words .. this better solidifies the 'event' in your memory 💫 and once you have a routine of this process, you'll begin to see the patterns
see, dreams play out in kind of a sequential manner, because they're advancing you through a storyline as you advance through your lifeline
like, in this dream of mine, the location is generally the same: a beautiful, luminescent silvery blue gray, like you see on large, coastal waterways around late afternoon to sunset .. it's as if the waters are shimmering, brimming with liquid metal 🔥 and with a brilliance only higher energies could create 💙
sometimes it's felt as if I'm on a beach or within a very large, flat wetland that is bordered all around with a few ancient stone homes and wooden cottages off in the distance .. other times, it's been a more modern feel of a very large commercial conference venue yet on some remote tropical island 🏝️
usually, there is no horizon .. no 'line' differentiating a sky above or a terrain below .. and no end to anything at all in sight ❤️‍🔥 there is never a sun, per se, yet the entire landscape is illuminated with an intense yet diffused light and, similar to when I meditate and travel up to the stars, there is no temperature yet you're exceptionally comfortable ☺️
all that said 🌱🕊️🫧 the activities taking place in this serene location feels as if it's a conference of sorts and THIS time, everyone who has gathered now knows what they're to do and are simply enjoying each others company 🙏 they're all just so content to be together, including me 🌿 over the last weeks, it's gone from giving me the sense that we're performing our 'preparations' to a genuine feel of an upcoming completion of activities
my interpretation of these as of late: there IS a rise in global collective consciousness .. which IS happening real time .. and WILL be the catalyst for the event which will 'begin the cleansing process' 🌎 as to what, where or when that event is, I have zero knowledge nor inclination to espouse an opinion lol
but NO ONE can deny that the Truth is finally being told, to more and more every day .. and more importantly, is being heard now by millions who were deaf for so very long 😔
can't believe I'm about to say this out loud 🤭 however it's absolutely a really cool time to be alive, guys .. shit show and all, we're going to bear witness so a new cosmic creation celebration unlike anyone's ever seen 🔥
I M H O: the world will indeed, be cleansed once again, and this will happen within most of our lifetimes .. and those with eyes wide open will continue forward ✨ who chose to live small, sober and vigilant 💚 live minimally and mindfully 🪴 and remained pure of heart ♥️
and that means: those will, most likely, be the children 🌼 rather than those of us old enough to have become jaded haha 🤣 don't worry, there's still time for everyone to focus on the good and ignore the bad .. oh, and be kind .. and maybs we 'non kids' can jump in alongside the others ✨
it's really that simple 🙂
peace to you, dear friend ☮️

hidey ho folks 🌹
let's talk dreams 🍃 and their importance to your future
and to start, today I'll share a bit about some of the dreams / visions / astral travels in which I've been blessed to participate these last few weeks (truth be told, more like decades)
I believe it can be very important to remember your dream upon awakening .. to journal and discuss your dreams whenever you can; writing down you anything and everything you recall, using your best active vocabulary words .. this better solidifies the 'event' in your memory 💫 and once you have a routine of this process, you'll begin to see the patterns
see, dreams play out in kind of a sequential manner, because they're advancing you through a storyline as you advance through your lifeline
like, in this dream of mine, the location is generally the same: a beautiful, luminescent silvery blue gray, like you see on large, coastal waterways around late afternoon to sunset .. it's as if the waters are shimmering, brimming with liquid metal 🔥 and with a brilliance only higher energies could create 💙
sometimes it's felt as if I'm on a beach or within a very large, flat wetland that is bordered all around with a few ancient stone homes and wooden cottages off in the distance .. other times, it's been a more modern feel of a very large commercial conference venue yet on some remote tropical island 🏝️
usually, there is no horizon .. no 'line' differentiating a sky above or a terrain below .. and no end to anything at all in sight ❤️‍🔥 there is never a sun, per se, yet the entire landscape is illuminated with an intense yet diffused light and, similar to when I meditate and travel up to the stars, there is no temperature yet you're exceptionally comfortable ☺️
all that said 🌱🕊️🫧 the activities taking place in this serene location feels as if it's a conference of sorts and THIS time, everyone who has gathered now knows what they're to do and are simply enjoying each others company 🙏 they're all just so content to be together, including me 🌿 over the last weeks, it's gone from giving me the sense that we're performing our 'preparations' to a genuine feel of an upcoming completion of activities
my interpretation of these as of late: there IS a rise in global collective consciousness .. which IS happening real time .. and WILL be the catalyst for the event which will 'begin the cleansing process' 🌎 as to what, where or when that event is, I have zero knowledge nor inclination to espouse an opinion lol
but NO ONE can deny that the Truth is finally being told, to more and more every day .. and more importantly, is being heard now by millions who were deaf for so very long 😔
can't believe I'm about to say this out loud 🤭 however it's absolutely a really cool time to be alive, guys .. shit show and all, we're going to bear witness so a new cosmic creation celebration unlike anyone's ever seen 🔥
I M H O: the world will indeed, be cleansed once again, and this will happen within most of our lifetimes .. and those with eyes wide open will continue forward ✨ who chose to live small, sober and vigilant 💚 live minimally and mindfully 🪴 and remained pure of heart ♥️
and that means: those will, most likely, be the children 🌼 rather than those of us old enough to have become jaded haha 🤣 don't worry, there's still time for everyone to focus on the good and ignore the bad .. oh, and be kind .. and maybs we 'non kids' can jump in alongside the others ✨
it's really that simple 🙂
peace to you, dear friend ☮️