Jaw pain after drinking margaritas

Dryfasting

2016.02.16 12:12 Dryfasting

No food and no water. The dry fasting discord link: https://discord.gg/jUX7RBcCqH https://dryfastingclub.com
[link]


2023.06.04 23:21 StabathaSays Wtf Caleb

Wtf Caleb submitted by StabathaSays to Sims4 [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:20 endersgame69 Adopted By Humans VII C16

It was not long, a mere week or three, after that point, that I found myself on a conference call with William, myself, Livingston, and the Earth Presider.
They all had stern, serious expressions on their faces, and my people’s ambassador had his hairs standing on end.
I’d begun that day wanting to spend time with Fauve down at the local coffee shop, Bau was on one of her rare trips outside of Chi’cagoa Rea, and I’d promised her I’d buy her a cup too so we could catch up.
I have to admit… ā€˜I actually ā€˜like’ having a sibling.’ I had that thought more than once. We weren’t too far off in age, at least as far as our species went, we’d both been drawn to the same things and we were both rising stars in our fields… even if she was one in relative exile, since she couldn’t go to Dlamias without getting arrested for the high crime of Job Abandonment.
It was one step removed from treason, since it undercut the security and stability of the state, but since I was on Earth, I had no obligation nor did anyone else have a right to arrest her.
So… coffee and shoptalk and probably Fauve doing a video interview on the fly over coffee… ā€˜Just Cook’n With Cookie’ was not an exceptionally popular show and more ā€˜alien content’ was a hot commodity on Earth and its colonies.
But no, instead of shop talk with a long absent sibling and my personal human, I had to deal with… I did not know what. But I was in no position to refuse the request.
ā€œI will be blunt. We want your starbase ready faster. Much faster. You are moving far too slowly.ā€ Livingston said it matter of factly, calmly, as if he were just giving you the time of day.
But I could read his body language. Bristling fur, ears down, tail stiff.
ā€œThat’s an unusual request, but before we even get to the whyā€¦ā€ The Presider turned toward William, his image flickered a little, ā€œCan it be done at all?ā€
I wondered about that myself, mind you, I wasn’t the only one building a space station, Earth was embarking on a massive expansion plan, putting stations in orbit around every world and a number of moons in their solar system. Whether it be to harvest gas or fuel or minerals or whatever else, or just to build defense platforms and additional shipyards, they were not acting by halves.
But mine was the most ambitious, meant specifically to rapidly enhance human capabilities… my gamble that Dlamias wouldn’t get in the way was now paying off in spades as my world evidently was badly in need of a competent ally.
William rubbed his jaw, ā€œIt can be done… I mean, if I had the right AI construction program and the manual supervisors to order it in accordance with our modification plans…it could be theoretically completed in a few months. We’d just need the shift personnel working twenty-four hours per day with a two hour overlap per shift to ensure continuity… but?ā€ He shrugged.
ā€œBut what?ā€ I asked. My tail was already wagging, the idea of finishing Paradyse sooner was frankly intoxicating.
ā€œIt’s a highly specialized position, there’s only so many people who can handle this kind of work, and right now they’re scattered across dozens of space station projects here and in other systems. If there were some more on Earth, I’d have hired them already.ā€ He answered and slumped.
ā€œIt doesn’t matter how fast you pour water into a pitcher that only holds a liter, it’ll still overflow when it hits the limit.ā€ He said it, and the Presider leaned back in his chair.
ā€œThere you have it.ā€ The Presider answered, but Livingston was not through.
ā€œWhat if you were provided the help?ā€ Livingston’s question was punctuated by a gesture toward his holostation, and I could see the little jerking motions of his finger as he swiped data over from his position to ours.
ā€œWe can bring three thousand qualified personnel able to handle the various aspects of your station and monitor all the necessary construction. We can have them here…soon.ā€
ā€œThat would shave considerable time off the construction.ā€ William answered off the cuff as he began flipping through the documents our Ambassador sent his way. The Presider was clearly going through the same information.
ā€œNormally we would need to vet these for security purposesā€¦ā€ The Presider murmured half-heartedly as his eyes scanned the names on the list.
ā€œThere’s not a lot of time for that, Mr. Presider.ā€ Livingston asserted.
ā€œI suppose there’s not. I suppose… there’s not.ā€ He ran his hand through his thick silver hair and began to breath with great slowness.
ā€œWe will throw in sufficient materials to begin fleet construction immediately.ā€ Livingston promised, and that seemed to be what the Presider was waiting for.
ā€œAlright… we accept your…help. And as a show of good faith, we will join the Rapax conference as you wish. Joint exercises will begin immediately and we will increase patrols across our stretch of the Sindari Road.ā€ The Presider’s offer was perhaps more generous than it needed to be.
But then again, it was also things that were in the human interests.
Even so, it didn’t make a great deal of sense for me to be here. William could have informed me about everything after the fact. I missed my coffee date with Fauve and Bau over this. My annoyance began to reach its peak and I asked, ā€œForgive me, but… why am I here? I realize it’s my station project and everything, but there doesn’t seem to be anything for me in particular to do with any of this.ā€
Livingston drummed his fingers on his desk, a gesture matched by that of the Earth Presider.
ā€œI think we both know better than that, Bailey Walker.ā€ Livingston said pointedly, ā€œYou are half the reason the Praeda are up in arms, all those prey evolved species who are quaking in their scales, skins, furs, bladders, branches, or whatever it is they have or live in.ā€
ā€œI… think that’ s a bit excessive. Don’t you think so, Presider?ā€ I asked, but the square faced human only gave a sharp denial with the shake of his head.
ā€œNo. No I do not. However, that doesn’t have to be a bad thing.ā€ He pointed out before I could start to panic.
ā€œYou’re going to explain yourself. Personally.ā€ Livingston leaned across his desk as if he thought I couldn’t see him well enough. Both our worlds, in fact the most dangerous of the Hundred Terrors, are all sending diplomatic teams to speak with the common of the Praeda, to convince them that we mean them no harm, to convince them that we are not responsible for what has been happeningā€¦ā€
ā€œThe job Fauve referred to.ā€ I guessed.
ā€œWait, so my daughter… Bailey, you didn’t mention this?!ā€ William turned on me at once, his eyes wide with horror.
ā€œI assumed you knew!ā€ I exclaimed, and he almost instantly slumped.
ā€œOf course you did, and of course she didn’t.ā€ William concluded.
ā€œThey say a bird has got to leave the nest, but I didn’t think it would ever be to another part of the galaxyā€¦ā€ William’s heavy breath might as well have had the weight of the world on it to even imagine what lay ahead.
ā€œNot to worry, we don’t plan on sending your daughter, or your friend, alone.ā€ The Presider said, and I felt a knot of certainty crystalize in the pit of my stomach, that that did not sound as benign as I might have hoped.
submitted by endersgame69 to TheWorldMaker [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:19 DemandImmediate1288 Anyone with chicken trauma experience in this sub?

Anyone with chicken trauma experience in this sub?
She was attacked by a dog a couple days ago (see my post history) and we've been hoping it was just a strain, but so far no change. She has a good appetite and drinking lots of water, doesn't seem to be in pain, but is unable to put any weight on the leg. I don't feel a break, and doesn't feel dislocated. She has a good grip with her foot. I Can't find a vet that will see her. I really don't know what else to do for her. Any suggestions? How long should I give her???
Is there a Reddit group to ask vet question?
submitted by DemandImmediate1288 to BackYardChickens [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:18 unoriginal-loser Am I giving my cats too much water mixed in their food?

Cats, about 1 year old, male, neutered.
This is only happening with Hammy. Harold is fine. Hammy has been having really soft poops. Not liquid, just really soft. I'm not sure if it's just because he likes to poop while I'm cleaning the boxes so I just scoop it right then, it doesn't have time to harden.
I started feeding them 1/2 can wet cat food a day about a week ago and just switched them to a new dry food yesterday.
Feeding is like this
8a, 1p, 6p, 11p
2 meals are dry food mixed with water (about 15 grams dry food with enough water to just cover it in their bowls)
1 is just dry food without anything added.
The 4th meal is wet food and I add a little tiny bit of water and a little bit of dry food.
They have water available all the time and they do drink it, especially after the just dry food meal. They get a couple of crunchy treats daily also.
submitted by unoriginal-loser to AskVet [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:18 Standard_Quit_2205 Can family start legal action in this case?

Events happened about 20h ago in Scotland. People A; B and C are heavily drinking on Saturday night. Around midnight an idea of test-driving a sports motorcycle comes in mind . Person A, the rightful owner of the uninsured bike, hands the keys to person B. Person B takes the keys and gets on bike with person C on the rear seat. No helmets, insurance or any type of driving licences in sight. Few minutes later they crash in a parked van. Person C suffers no injuries at all, person B has broken all ribs, smashed shoulder, broken leg and both arms, will be in medically induced coma for the next 2-3 days. No other casualties. My questions-
Can B’s family take legal action against A? What type of punishment can B and A expect after police investigation, bear in mind no one holds a drivers licence and bike was uninsured.?
submitted by Standard_Quit_2205 to LegalAdviceUK [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:16 _The_Sorcerer_ I need some feedback on my guide to datura consumption

This is a guide to safely using datura be it for recreational or spiritual purposes.
I will first clear some misconceptions before going into the actual guide.
1 Datura is not dangerous (to the extent that hospitalization would be required or death could occur) so long as it is properly dosed as will be described in this post.
2 The physical effects of datura cannot last for weeks, they may at most last for 3-4 days if you overdose. It’s unlikely that datura will cause permanent damage (noticeable at least) unless you take lethal doses or you take hallucinogenic doses too often.
3 Technically you can get high from seeds that you bought but practically >not really<. The seeds you buy have been usually left sitting for years causing them to lose all their potency. Furthermore to properly dose with datura, hundreds if not thousands of seeds will have to be sacrificed in the testing process to find the appropriate dose with the desired effects so unless you can buy in bulk thousands of seeds, ingesting them is a waste of money.
4 Effects from datura intoxication can’t randomly hit 12 hours after initial consumption.
5 The majority of negative trip reports come from individuals who had false expectations of datura in other words they expected a psychedelic or other experience instead of a deliriant one and from people who did not follow the basic principles of harm reduction for datura.
Now onto the actual guide.
Symptoms of datura intoxication
It is essential to know what you’re getting when going into datura. It’s surprising how so many people have written stories about their hallucinations but haven’t bothered to inform their readers of the extreme poisoning they experienced to reach that delirium. In my list of symptoms I will separate them on categories according to how high your dose of datura needs to be consumed to experience them. You will see that delirium is reached only when you are suffering a very severe case of poisoning.
1 In microdoses datura can help enhance your mood and it reportedly also enhances your dreams. Microdoses are also useful in combination with other drugs that cause nausea.
2 In low doses dehydration begins to set in causing you to experience dry mouth, your saliva turns to foam and then it stops being produced entirely making it difficult and eventually impossible to swallow food. You will generally experience a pleasant high at this stage, similar in many ways to alcohol but with nausea replaced by dry mouth.
3 Medium doses. At such doses, you will experience extreme dizziness, dehydration will worsen, the dryness reaching all the way into the esophagus, making breathing and speaking incredibly painful. Pupils will begin to dilate, your skin will become dry and irritable, body temperature will rise causing fever and heart rates will increase. Water will also begin to taste like chemical waste, making the only relief to the dehydration feel like a form of torture. You may experience urinary retention and difficulty walking at this point.
4 High doses. At this point (if you’ve consumed sedating datura species) you will likely become paralyzed and will pass out. You may at times feel freezing and at times feel like you’re boiling (which you will actually be boiling). The pain you will be physically experiencing might be greater than any of those you have experienced throughout your life yet you will find no difficulty in sleeping even at that state. You may also experience some anxiety (for example feeling like you’re dying). Convulsions may occur and if you’re awake your mind will be in complete disarray, it will feel as if it’s a radio station and you’re scrolling through all the stations as fast as possible.
5 Hallucinogenic doses. Congratulations if you didn’t reach this point by accident. At such doses, you will no longer be able to tell apart dream from reality. You may witness the most impossible scenarios unfold before you without being able to tell they’re hallucinations. Depending on your luck and preparation you will be apathetic to them, meaning that you will treat them like you would in a dream. If it doesn’t go like that, then there is a chance the hallucinations will be scary. The greatest threat of datura intoxication is losing almost complete control over your body and consciousness. This unique experience to some might be forgotten to a great extent due to the amnesia you will experience once you regain consciousness. If you consumed sedating datura species, then you might not even experience this stage as you will be sleeping through it.
Sum up of the positive effects you can get: a unique experience, some of the most interesting and intense hallucinations, (extreme sedation depending on species), heavy intoxication, potent anxiety relief and anti emetic effects.
Now that you are aware of all the symptoms datura can cause you, an important question must be asked:
ā€œWhy do you want to take datura?ā€
Do you want to take datura recreationally, or do you want to get a unique experience?
If you want to take datura recreationally then your best bet is smoking it or using it topically, not consuming it by any of the other means.
If you want to trip on datura, then the only viable way is through ingestion.
A word of warning: datura is a deliriant, it’s a drug that will not appeal to most people. It has little recreational value because trips involve physical discomfort and depressant properties. Even when administered in its milder forms such as smoking and ointment, it’s still not a party drug or at least, it’s a poor choice for a party drug. The reason someone would come back to datura having already obtained the unique experience of delirium, is for the peace of mind that datura offers in high doses, for a lot of people getting severely poisoned isn’t worth it to obtain that, for some it is.
Onto the guide to dosing then
How to dose on datura
First off some general information on datura that should be taken into consideration when it comes to dosing.
1 Different species of datura vary in potency and they may also differ in their effects to some extent. Generally speaking innoxia and wrigtii are thought to have a higher scopolamine to atropine ratio making them more mellow (less toxic) while stramonium is thought to have a lower ratio making it more toxic and more stimulant than the others. All species of datura and brugmansia are predominantly depressants but they have some stimulant properties (such as tachycardia). Stramonium should be avoided as a first time species because it increases the chance of the user being energetic while on it and wreaking havoc. There are contradicting reports about brugmansia some stating that it’s more mellow while others stating that it’s more aggressive than datura, I would place brugmansia species between innoxia and stramonium.
2 The different parts of datura have different potencies. Generally, the seeds are considered to be the most potent, then follow the roots, then the flowers and then the leaves.
3 Each plant differs in potency. No, you won’t have to learn to dose with each plant or species differently (except maybe for the accursed stramonium) but when you start dosing, until you become accustomed enough to datura, it’s best to only use a single plant. When you’re familiar enough with datura then you’ll be fine using and blending different plants; you may occasionally be caught off guard by weaker or stronger doses but this isn’t cause for concern, datura allows plenty room for mistakes, it’s only those that are blatantly careless who get punished (usually).
4 Tolerance to the mental effects of datura builds extremely fast even if you don’t experience said effects. If you consume datura more often than once per week, then you will slowly begin to become immune to its deliriant properties, even if your doses aren’t strong.
5 If you’re consuming medium+ doses, then you will need to make sure you have the day after the trip off. If you consume a delirious dose, the delirium itself will usually last for ~12hours, you will remain poisoned for 2 days and your sight may be blurry for up to 3 days. The effects of non hallucinogenic doses should be resolved within a day.
Seed ingestion
This is the one and only method everyone wanting to hallucinate with datura should start with. Dosages are easy to calculate with seeds and you don’t need to consume a lot of plant matter to get effects.
I should note that brugmansia seeds are not worth using with this method: it takes too much effort to remove their shell and eating them with it is impractical. (Swallowing them whole will probably cause them to not even be digested, they are basically chunks of wood.)
With seed ingestion you can easily and safely find your hallucinogenic dose with the following method:
1 You start from a dose of 1-10 seeds
2 Chew the seeds or grind them so that they’re easier to digest and absorb the alkaloids
2 Each time increase your dose by 2-5 seeds until you get the desired effects
3 Between each dose of less than 30 seeds you will wait at least 3 days
4 Between doses of over 30 seeds, you will wait at least a week
This process will probably take you over 2 months but by the time you find your hallucinogenic dose (or quit) you will be accustomed to the symptoms of datura. There will be nothing to catch you off guard and you’ll avoid having a bad trip (well, all datura trips with high doses could be considered unpleasant but the experience and the aftereffects are what determine whether a datura trip was good or bad.)
Now onto a less safe but much faster way of dose testing with seeds:
1 You start from a dose of 10-30 seeds (No, 30 seeds can’t kill you or cause you permanent damage even if they’re the most potent seeds in the world.)
2 If you experience no symptoms then you are free to double your dose
3 If you experience dry mouth then you may increase your dose by 20-40% at a time
4 Between each dose which causes dry mouth you will need to wait at least a week for your tolerance to reset
In all instances, symptoms should kick in within 1 hour of consumption and they should peak within 6 hours.
Tea consumption
The beauty of making datura tea is that it is easy to consume and it can be made extremely potent. It is also not limited to seeds but can make use of the entire plant, giving anyone who has access to a decent sized plant an endless supply of plant matter to trip on.
Its downside? It can only vaguely be dosed. For that reason, you should only begin using tea once you’re confident enough to say ā€œfuck itā€ when it comes to dosing (in other words when you’re already too far gone).
When making tea, the best parts of the plant to use are its flowers, they give it a pleasant fragrance and do not have an unpleasant flavor. Flowers generally have consistent sizes so they can be dosed with.
Leaves may be used but I suggest you do so when they are dried. Making tea out of fresh leaves will give it an extremely unpleasant smell and taste. Leaf sizes are completely inconsistent so they’re difficult to dose with.
Seeds can be used in tea form; they should be grinded before being added. Seeds will add a chemical flavor to the tea, it’s quite unpleasant. Brugmansia seeds can practically only be used for tea making like this (Literally, brugmansia seeds have no other use, even in gardening, you’re much better off with cuttings).
To make the tea, you simply put the ingredients in the water and let it boil for a bit. You can add some honey or sugar to help with the flavor.
Effects should kick in within 1 hour after initial consumption (in fact, in my experience they hit a bit faster than when ingesting seeds).
Consuming datura raw
I don’t understand why anyone would make themselves go through the pain of eating datura leaves or flowers raw. It’s an impractical way to consume them and in my little experience with this method, it almost always caused me some gut pain the following day. The taste of the flowers is bearable, not so much of the leaves.
Making datura wine
If you’re bold enough, you can mix in alcohol with datura by putting dried leaves and flowers inside bottles of alcohol. The alcohol makes a surprisingly good job of absorbing the alkaloids and its potency is on part with its tea equivalent. I’d advise against using alcohol stronger than wine for this purpose. Datura has on its own certain depressant properties and so adding more depressants into the mix might be a dangerous choice to make.
The properties of the wine will not be lost even after months.
Effects will set in within an hour of consumption.
Smoking datura
This is the best method of consuming datura if you’re doing it for recreational purposes though don’t get your hopes high. Smoking destroys most of the alkaloids in datura making it extremely weak in comparison to other routes of administration while at the same time allowing the user to instantly feel the effects and gauge whether they can or cannot take more, in other words it is almost completely harmless for everyone. Smoking will get you high while only giving you slight effects of dehydration. The high produced from smoking is similar to weed but much more subtle and drowsier.
Because a big chunk of datura’s toxins are burnt with this method, it is not possible to experience delirium with it.
You may grind dried leaves and flowers and smoke them on their own or along with weed for a pleasant high.
The effects will set in very fast ~5 minutes should be more than enough, making it a lot easier to dose with this method (not that you really need to).
Making ointment
It is possible to make datura ointment/extract which can be used transdermally (or orally if you’re insane). This is a relatively safe way of using datura as only scopolamine can cross the skin.
The effects caused by the ointment are pain relief, numbness, elevated body temperature and mild intoxication depending on the potency of the ointment. (It should be able to become potent enough to create the sensation of literally flying, though to get such a potent ointment would probably require a lot of care and skill).
Ointment can be made by mixing the grinded parts of the plant with oil and leaving them to sit for days, then straining the liquid and repeatedly performing this process. This can be done with water too but it is way easier for bacteria to grow in it than it is in oil. For maximum potency use enough grinded plant matter to absorb the entire volume of the oil.
The oil may then be applied over blood vessels or wherever you feel pain, it may take over an hour for any serious effects to hit and large quantities will usually be required. This is an arduous process which is not worth if you’re trying to get high or hallucinate.
It is also possible to chemically extract the alkaloids off of datura but by that point, you’re no longer consuming datura.
What to do before/while/after tripping
You can take certain steps to make sure or at least try to make your trip more comfortable.
First off, I am not in favor of the idea of trip sitters because it is very easy for them to mess up your hallucinations/taint your first experience. That said, a trip sitter is the only guarantee that you won’t piss your neighbor’s window in the middle of the night.
Preparation
Before any effects set in, make sure you have water at close vicinity from any place you might sit or lay down at. It may prove at times too difficult to even extend your arm to reach a glass of water.
It is also crucial that you have a full stomach before consuming datura. Attempting to eat solid food during a trip will result in you choking. Furthermore, the day after the trip, you will likely have lost your appetite so you must be prepared to not eat any food for up to 2 days.
Wear comfortable clothes, you may not even realize how quickly the effects have set in before you can barely stand. If you are sitting down, especially if you’re fixed on screen, you won’t know how severely intoxicated you are until you stand up. You may be unable to take off or change your clothes at that point.
Treating symptoms
It is very difficult to treat datura intoxication as it has both symptoms of depressant and stimulant drugs. For example, if you attempt to treat the sedation and paralysis with coffee, your heart rate which is already high will skyrocket and potentially cause heart failure. If you on the other hand take painkillers to treat your fever and pain, you might die from respiratory depression. There is little to be done to treat the symptoms of the poisoning, if they are unbearable, you are better off sleeping them away. For the dry mouth and sore throat, juice from citrus fruits might be of some help. For the fever, your best bet is wet towels on your forehead; it is especially important to treat the fever as your body can reach temperatures of over 40 degrees Celsius and cause brain damage. If you desperately need food to calm your stomach, you might be able to drink a smoothie. You can at least find some comfort in the fact that it’s difficult to die from datura -if- you followed the previous instructions on dosing. It is easy to suffer poisoning from datura but much more difficult to die from it. The underlying threat of the experience adds a sort of beauty to it.
Delirium
Now if you’re going through all this pain for the hallucinations, you might need to set up an alarm in the middle of your trip. If you’ve been using sedating species of datura, then chances are that you pass out at the peak of your trips. You can attempt to wake yourself up using an alarm or a friend at that point so that you can experience hallucinations. (I must note here that a friend of mine had someone clapping their hands above her face to no avail, so whether you succeed in waking yourself up or not is uncertain.)
Whether you’ll remember or not your hallucinations is yet another issue. Treating this one is difficult, if you had success have good dream recall, then this might be easier for you(seeing as dreams and delirium are much alike). Practicing recalling dreams may be the only way to treat this issue. Practice makes perfect but in this case, regular practice with the actual substance will prove detrimental to the user’s health.
Despite popular belief, you can make away just fine on your own even in delirium, that is if you can outsmart your deliriant self. You might literally be required to troll yourself to prevent your deliriant self from pissing that neighbor’s window. Locking your door and hiding the keys is important but don’t underestimate your deliriant self. You can leave notes and marks on your door which will help yourself realize what you’re about to do. Sharp objects are best hidden away though I have to say that the deliriant self does not act out of character so if you don’t mess around with knives, then such precautions are not necessary, if on the other hand for some reason you have self harming tendencies, then god forbid you try this plant in the first place. Also make sure your car keys are well hidden as well. If you want to be extra cautious, you can turn off the power for kitchen appliances in case you get really hungry during delirium and burn your place.
Now with all these said, don’t go tripping on entire seedpods for your first time and then writing about how you had a terrible experience on datura. This is a safe plant for those who are patient and cautious and it can give you some unique experiences.
submitted by _The_Sorcerer_ to SacredNightshades [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:16 Which_Stress3167 Is feeding to sleep for naps really that bad?

I just started work again this week and my 4 month old has been taken care of by my MIL 5 days a week. He's always been really hard to get to sleep and the 4 month regression hit the week before I went to work. Before that I managed to wean him off contact napping and he was falling asleep in his mini crib through me rocking it (it's on wheels) and he was finally extending naps past one sleep cycle. It took so much hard work and many tears of mine to get him there.
After the regression everything fell apart and his naps shortened. He CRIES before he has to sleep EVERY. TIME. Like real crying. Has been like that since birth. The first day my MIL took care of him she was really surprised that he cried for 30 min before his first nap. She laid down next to him in the bed to fall asleep. I guess since then to make it easier on both of them she's been feeding him to sleep - she told me she will put a couple oz. In a bottle and lay him down once sleepy. He's getting enough oz. In the day even with these mini feeds.
I've been trying to set up good sleep habits and avoid the feed to sleep association. However I've developed PPD and PPA that is completely focused on his sleep and naps and wake windows, etc. I've been going to a therapist weekly. This week has been a little bit freeing that I don't have to coordinate his naps and worry about wake windows all day. I told her about his WW but I think she's just been going off his cues. I wasn't thrilled when I found out she's been feeding to sleep but - some of his naps have apparently been good, like an 1.5 to 2 hrs, which I can't even remember the last time he napped that well with me.
This weekend has been a complete shit show with his naps at home - my normal methods of rocking the crib, rocking in arms aren't really working. I'm not watching WW because I'm trying to watch cues like my MIL does and LO is just screaming so much before his naps that it's really triggering my PPA to the point that I had a breakdown and had to leave him crying in the crib. Should I just give in to feeding to sleep? She seems to be successful with it and it seems like LO is getting more rest under her care than mine, but I still feel wary that it's going backwards from independent sleep. But she's right it's just easier for everyone and my anxiety and mood is so horrible this weekend I just want someone else to handle everything and follow their lead because its less emotional and mental stress for me. Worrying about his naps is literally stealing all the joy of motherhood and being with my baby from me.
So I guess what I'm asking is should I just do what's easy right now for all our sakes and for my mental health? Or am I setting myself and my baby up for pain in the future? We don't feed to sleep for nights at all and I'm aware of the danger of having to feed every hour if we do, but is it really that bad for naps?
submitted by Which_Stress3167 to beyondthebump [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:14 nicki714 Speed after eating fruits= wasting product?

Do I waste my speed, if I bomb it after I ate something with vitamin C like pineapple?
Because I read that vitC gets speed faster out of the body (I drink a lot water on speed and probably flush it out fast already)
does anyone know how much fruit you can eat so that you don't have a weaker or shorter time on speed?
+Maybe any other tips on eating and not wasting product?
submitted by nicki714 to speed [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:14 ariesflowerchild412 Manipulative/narcissistic stepfather hellbent on isolating my mother

This is a bit long so I’ll try to break this up into digestible parts. warning
My mom (64F) and stepdad (68M) met when they went to college (she was a freshman and he was a senior). They didn’t really date and she dropped out of the private college and went to a community college for nursing. They went on with their lives. She met and dated my dad and my dad was absent. My mom fully raised me alone. We moved to Florida from Virginia when I was 7 years old to be near my grandparents while my mom worked as a full time nurse (on call peeps would know). My relationship with my absent dad has affected me and how I have relationship with men in my life.
When I was going to college, my mom had a traveling nurse job in Massachusetts. My grandparents bought me plane ticket from Florida to Massachusetts for my spring break trip. And that’s where I met my moms new boyfriend. She found out he lived in Georgia and after she asked him to visit, he quit his CPA job and moved all of his stuff to Massachusetts. I was going through a depressing post breakup time and needed my mom. He hated and resented any time I was there. He took me around Boston (my fave city) and I had a great time, but felt something was off. My mom didn’t come because she had to work. I remember him barely talking to me the entire time. I remember we went back to the house and he told my mom he felt he was babysitting me. When I came back to Florida, I was so severely depressed from my breakup, college, and now losing my other parent, I dropped out of school after I lied to my mom I wasn’t passing (out of depression of leaving my school because she wouldn’t pay if I switched majors). And he’d use that against me and made me feel like I wasn’t anything.
I had no money, no job, an apartment I couldn’t afford. My mom let me stay in a place she was renting. I was told I needed a job from someone who didn’t have one. I thought I wasn’t enough or a good daughter anymore. I was compared to his brothers daughters. Two months into their relationship, they got married (she proposed). And then married two years later. The same year they got engaged, I met my boyfriend of 6.5 years now.
My stepdad has been very good to my mom and has treated her better than any man she dated before had. Almost to a sickening and smothering way. He would act like a saint to my grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. I would come back to Florida, tell my family what I witnessed with him and was told ā€œallow your mom to be happy,ā€ ā€œstop being so selfish.ā€ My mom and stepdad would stop coming to things, cancel at the most painful last minute when things were ruined if they didn’t come, or come late to the point I’d miss my mom on holidays. If my mom and I talk about memories, he’s completely not there and on his phone. He checks out when the conversation isn’t about him. If I speak to my mother (in person/on the phone) he’s right there and hears everything. He gloats all the expensive things they do together but complain if I have a birthday dinner.
My family saw it on Christmas two years ago and my aunt called my step dad out on not working when my mom was working herself to death. He got very defensive and blamed me for his anxiety for buying a house with my boyfriend (we are both in my late 20s) and my aunt for having a troubled past and clawed her way out. He was very cruel and used my mom as a way to be defended. Which he still laments on to this day.
My mom saw how he feels towards me when he didn’t do something for me to stay the night and was upset we would talk about him. She said her sweet and kind man was different. I’ve called him out on subtle things he’s done such as unfriend me on social media (which to a 28F is a massive f*** you- and he told me it wasn’t a big deal), him telling my mom they need to leave during family gatherings, him lying about helping me financially and I paid him back, him taking pride in certain things that make him look good are just to name a few things.
After being talked to see family that hasn’t been seen, my mom and stepdad will come and he will ignore everyone and tell her to hurry up with angry expressions. This happened this past weekend at my grandmother’s house and my family that isn’t around much for years, saw his behavior. He knows people he kiss their asses so they don’t see the drama that he starts himself and blames others. Everyone is seeing through his selfish behavior and the disrespect is hurting.
submitted by ariesflowerchild412 to stepparents [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:14 TetheredToTreasures Guilt from having a hoard + Guilt from throwing items away

I have too much stuff. Way too much stuff. I KNOW that I have too much stuff and that it is holding me back from having a future. I think to myself ā€œI have to get rid of some of this stuff because it is weighing me down.ā€
For context I have a sentimental and ā€˜aspirational’ hoard of old stuff from my childhood and many items that I have collected from ā€˜free piles’ and dumpsters etc. The financial value of my hoard is nothing and no one else would see any value in it, although this doesn’t stop me from wanting to keep it.
Then when I try to sort through items I am brought back to ā€˜that funny moment at this certain place’ or ā€˜I could do this, this or this, with this item’ and I can’t part with it. I also don’t have the strength to part with boxes of stuff without looking, as I nearly did this once, and after changing my mind and looking through the box I found something very valuable to me.
I quickly get overwhelmed and although I can part with some stuff, maybe 15 to 20% (of what I sort through) at best, its going at a snail's pace and I am disappointed that I can’t just get rid of stuff like a regular person!
When I try to get rid of an item, I feel like I am throwing myself away, even though these are items like old school books that I haven’t looked at in years, or broken/damaged bits and bobs that I hope to repair to give them a new life. I am not so happy in my life currently and although everything wasn’t perfect during my earlier years, I feel like I am throwing away my happy memories by getting rid of my stuff. How could I throw away all of these things that I have valued so much?
I feel guilt that I cannot restore/fix items as fast as I acquire them. I feel bad for the items that they have been thrown away and that is one reason that I collect them from being trashed, so how can I be just as wasteful by getting rid of those items again?
I don’t want to have barely any space, I don’t want to be a hoarder, I don’t want to live in a hoard, I don’t want to feel so miserable being in spaces that should bring me joy, but getting rid of the items is just as painful and I seem to have lived in this limbo for far too long while getting nowhere.
I don’t know what help I am asking for particular; I just know that this is the only place I can contact where people will ā€˜get it.’
submitted by TetheredToTreasures to hoarding [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:13 Glub_Glub_Nhec Weird dream i had

i decided to sleep for a bit during the afternoon and had a dream in which i was sitting in an empty football pitch with my bestfriend and i recieved in my phone a picture from an unknown number, when i looked at it it was a picture of a tno super event (fall rot one) and then as i looked back i saw that we weren't alone and hermann gƶring from tno was sitting behind us and eating chicken and rice, he proceeded to offer me a chicken leg, which after i ate o felt horrible pain and woke up
submitted by Glub_Glub_Nhec to teenagers [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:13 ThrowAwayTayTay1 Pregnancy or Plan B?

My boyfriend and I had sex and he came in me. The next day, I went to pick up my birth control and learned the prescription expired bc I’m overdue for my annual OBGYN Apt. I bought a generic version of Plan B and took it that night. 5 days later we went to a wedding and had a lot of hotel sex (pull out; no condom).
A couple days after, I started bleeding dark brown. It wasn’t period blood - much less, much darker, no clots, etc. this lasted about 3.5 days and there really was no associated cramping or other symptoms.
Now, I’m not bleeding at all but I do have mild cramps (really just on my left side) and back pain. I’m so hungry but food is so unappealing to me. My breasts are swollen, I’m peeing more frequently and I can cry on the drop of a dime.
I used an ovulation calculator and learned I was most fertile the weekend of the wedding, and ovulated right after. I’m ~10 days away from my next period and am wondering if this is pregnancy or side effects of Plan B?
I’ve taken Plan B multiple times and experienced cramping the day of/day after, but never bleeding or food aversions over a week later)
Thoughts?
submitted by ThrowAwayTayTay1 to amipregnant [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:13 dreamy_blonde The end of our dead bedroom

I am together with my boyfriend for about 5 years. During this time, we never really had a great sex life. My boyfriend has a high libido, and I had a very low libido. I never really wanted sex, mainly because I felt a lot of discomfort during sex. Most of the time my boyfriend could not even enter me, or I'd want him to quit very soon. I did enjoy giving blowjobs and handjobs, but not PIV.
This caused some troubles between me & my boyfriend throughout the years, but he always supported me. He sometimes felt like he wasn't desired because I never initiated, which I felt really bad about because I did really like him. I had a post a few months back on this sub asking for help, and a lot of people wanted to help me for which I am really grateful.
We have talked for hours and hours on the subject (which was very difficult for me to do), and it turned out my problems and low libido were all completely psychological. I have had some traumatic sexual experiences in my past, which made my body reject sex. We worked on that together and just really openly shared how we felt without judgement, and boy did that help me a lot!
All of the sudden we could have sex again without me feeling any pain. I was completely shocked. With having regular sex again, my sex drive came back in full drive. Suddenly I felt myself craving sex every day, which is completely crazy to me after not having any sex drive for years. For the last few weeks I'm having sex with my boyfriend once or twice a day, and with that our relationship has also improved significantly. I feel very in love with him. I only now know what I was missing for so long. I somehow feel a little guilty for witholding this from my boyfriend, but I never knew what was "wrong" with me. I am very thankful for this sub for trying to help me and making me look for ways how to improve. I am now finally starting to feel joy in sex again.
submitted by dreamy_blonde to DeadBedrooms [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:12 yesAThrowawayName Sex Tips for Beginners (with a Late Start)

Throwaway because my cousin knows my reddit username. So does my fiancƩe, but she knows this throwaway as well :)
My fiancƩe [29F] and I [34M] are getting married in 15 days and will be having sex for the very first time ever shortly after we've finished escaping the reception (she and I have been together 7 years). No, we aren't religious, but it is important to both of us that we refrain from physically stimulating each other until we marry, however, we do masturbate together almost nightly and are very open and expressive about fantasies, sexual interests, and all sorts of acts that we think would be really neat. Essentially, we have a very healthy sex life for virgins.
That said, we've never had sex ever, and ideally I would like our first time to be very, very pleasurable. Of course, we know that we should be very communicative during the act (and we certainly will be), and I certainly know how she likes to touch herself (and she knows how I like to touch myself), but it would also be nice to know if there are any "tried and true" ways to go about this that will make this night very pleasurable.
For example, she enjoys having more than one orgasm in a row (as in without stopping stimulation) when she masturbates - is that something that usually translates to sex? Does she really have to pee immediately afterwards or can we just cuddle the night away? Is it generally a good idea to go more than one round if we can, or is sex strenuous enough that we might regret that decision the next morning? When eating her will her lubrication be affected if I drink it up, and if so, should I refrain from doing that too much if we want to immediately transition to penetrative sex? At my age will I still be likely to have a problem with cumming too fast the first time? Are there any general tips for things we should try that night?
I should note that we do not watch porn and I especially refuse to watch it (grosses me out, frankly), so unless you consider it an absolute necessity, I would like advice that does not involve watching it. Also, protection is not a concern for us (my vasectomy is over 3 months old).
submitted by yesAThrowawayName to sex [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:12 eggs_angel WIBTA if i asked my brother to stop drinking?

My brother (M24) and I (M21) are home for the summer from school (he’s a grad student). Our parents are out of town for the weekend. They don’t really care what we do too much since we’re both of age, but my brother hasn’t really drank over the past couple weeks or so other than a drink or two. Now that they are out of town, he’s bought a case of beer and is just casually drinking them.
I’m a little worried and uncomfortable because we have alcoholism in our family. He went a little crazy with partying his first couple years of college, going so far as to getting alcohol poisoning one night his sophomore year. After that incident, he began sobering up and didn’t drink for about a year or so. Now, he drinks on special occasions.
I don’t talk to him that much, so I’m not sure how bad it really was. I think it was worse than he implied, but I don’t know anything that would back that up.
He’s definitely binge drinking today. He told me that if I don’t like it, I can leave. I didn’t argue with him, but I’m not happy about this. He’s probably three beers in and started drinking about an hour ago.
A part of me wants to ask him to stop drinking, but I’m not sure if that would be fair or wise of me. He’s an adult and allowed to make his own decisions. He hasn’t drank in a while, so maybe it’s okay and I’m just being selfish/paranoid. I was kind of looking forward to this weekend so that I could have one-on-one time with him, which we haven’t had in a while. The fact that he’s drunk kind of puts a damper on that.
I’m sad and uncomfortable and a little scared, but would asking him to stop really be beneficial? Does he deserve a day to wind down and relax? Am I being selfish by putting my wishes above his enjoyment? I just don’t know what to do.
submitted by eggs_angel to AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:11 konigderwelt Advice needed please

Hi, I could really use some advice. I'm in a real bad place and don't know what to do.
I'm f26 (UK) I've been struggling with my mental health real bad (depression/anxiety/suicidal thoughts) I recently spoke to my GP about it all. I actually made the appointment about a pain in my ankle on 3rd May and after years of holding it all in I ended up talking to him about my MH too, because I was at breaking point. (Ironically I forgot to mention that I think I have ADHD as I was essentially just sobbing down the phone at this point on the call, which i really regret because I feel like it's part of the reason why I'm struggling so much rn.)
I'm on the waiting list for the therapy stuff but for my ankle my doc sent me a couple of texts, one with the opening hours for a local blood test place and another with a number for an x-ray department.
For the x-ray he said you don't need to call ahead and book you just show up, but the text didn't tell me which hospital x-ray dept I need to go to, so I knew I had to call still.
Anyway for the actual advice request.. it's now been over a month since I spoke to the GP and got the texts, will I still be able to go to the drop in blood place/x-ray dept or have I left it too long?
It's not been intentional I've just been feeling so shit mentally I didn't see the point in going because if my head's so bad why would I care about fixing physical pain? But now I've left it so long I don't even know if I can, and I'm hesitant to call the GP back as I feel the receptionists are gonna hate on me regardless of the answer and I get it, I've wasted everyone's time.
But I'm getting really worried about my ankle now, it started hurting in Sept 22 and it took me all the way to May 23 to make an appointment and now it's been even longer since and I want to go because I want the pain to end and I don't want it to get even worse but I don't know what to do?
I just feel completely useless, I need help but again, too useless to reach out and get it. And I'm just thinking and thinking and not doing anything.
(For context: I work full time so would have to take a day off work to get the tests done, though that's not a problem, just an extra step).
submitted by konigderwelt to ADHDUK [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:10 MountMancy Anyone here with PCOS?

Those who are diagnosed with PCOS, which Caroline’s program do you recommend best? It is said that slow, weight workouts as compared to HIIT help with PCOS. Also how long it took you to finally see considerable changes?
Also those who get extremely painful periods and lethargy, how do manage workout? Last when I started her Epic Heat, I went on a period break and then considered restarting from day 1 since I lost the momentum. I ended up doing no workout altogether and now after 6 months, I’m back to day 1 of Heat.
I want to avoid HIIT due to PCOS but also keep my workouts for 30 minutes as it fits in my schedule.
submitted by MountMancy to CarolineGirvan [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:10 micronesiarain Episode 6- "Robbed: The Musical!" šŸ’ƒšŸŽ¶

Episode 6-
the queens return to the workroom after Kami's elimination
Anthyy: Everybody, moment of silence for our sister.
šŸAnthyy CF: Kami just got sent home, and it really was worst case scenario. I love Sue, don't get me wrong! But Kami was probably my closest ally here. And with how shitty last week was for me, that just sealed it as the worst week so far.
Zodya: Congratulations to our winners! Really well deserved, you both did great. How does it feel?
Wren: I'll be honest, I was starting to doubt myself. On Season Six, I felt like I always had the opportunity to prove myself. Maybe it was by winning a challenge, or by lipsyncing.
Fleur: Shoutout to the bed!
Wren: As I was saying...I was able to prove myself as a competitor. But this time, it's felt a lot different. Let's be real, my track record wasn't great before this last challenge.
šŸFleur CF: She says as if it's better now.
Wren: But I finally feel like I showed what I have, and lipsyncing again felt like my batteries being recharged.
Sue: You run on batteries? I thought that was just me...what a world!
šŸWren CF: I'm feeling pumped right now. Micro saw me as the best of the week, it doesn't get any better than that. I'm taking this momentum and making it into as many wins as possible. Maybe I'm the new Greantee? I like the sound of that!
Steph: Has anyone else felt that way of questioning your place here?
Fleur: If not, a lot of you should.
Anthyy: I can't say I have. I'm in it to go all the way.
Morgs looks over at Anthyy, wondering if Anthyy had forgotten about their previous conversation during Untucked
šŸMorgs CF: It seems like Anthyy is out of the mindset of wanting to quit. Which is perfect! Losing Kami was a big hit to us, so it's important that Anthyy stays and keeps the focus on what really matters.
Zodya: Whorechata, what lipstick do you have tucked away?
Whorechata: Yikes, this is awkward.
Sue: Oh...
Whorechata: I chose Micro. It was the only decision that felt right to me!
Zodya: If you don't show us who you actually picked...
Whorechata: I also chose Kami. It really was nothing personal. She said she had the fire to stay, and I wanted to believe her. But I didn't see that fire in her the same way that I did with Sue. And girl, you know I wasn't about to send you home. Our history goes back too far for me to do that to you.
Sue: You can never know for certain, so I really appreciate this.
Whorechata: I got you.
šŸBlondie CF: The FDR queens definitely need to be broken up. Whorechata saving Sue proves that even if they don't have this crazy close relationship, that FDR bond is enough to influence a major decision. Next time I'm in the top, I have to go after one of them. Or multiple of them, why not!
The Next Day
the queens strut into the workroom, wearing coordinated outfits
šŸMorgs CF: It's a new day in the workroom, and the group is getting smaller and smaller. Next thing you know, it'll look like a bunch of fairies running around! Honey, I shrunk the kids!!
Wren: I want to start off the day by apologizing to Anthyy and Morgs for how I acted during the challenge. It wasn't cute, and I see that now. I don't know, it just felt like all the stress was finally getting to me, and I put so much pressure onto myself.
Morgs: In my heart, I should be mad at you. But you are also the prettiest lady I've ever seen, so I can't be mad! It's all good, for real.
Anthyy: Definitely.
šŸAnthyy CF: I can forgive Wren, but I won't forget. She's the reason I don't know if I want to be here anymore, and I can't let that go. I'm feeling better than I was before, but I'm still not in it all the way. I'm getting in my head about it, I don't know what I need to do to feel better about this.
the workroom door swings open and Micro walks in, wearing a sequin caftan with teased out curly hair
Micro: Hello hello queens! Who else cried themselves to sleep last night after that elimination? Just me? Okay, we love that! Anywho, it's time for your next challenge. All of you have one thing in common. Whether you got close to the prize, or went home too early, none of you got the crown on your original seasons. And I'm sure you'd all be inclined to say that you were robbed. Which is why your next challenge is a musical journey through the crushing feeling of defeat. Because what is a drag race without a little emotional exploitation?! Each of you will choose a song of your choice, and then select sixteen lines from that song. Using the rhythm of the song, you'll be rewriting the lyrics to tell the story of how you were eliminated. The songs you choose and the approach you take are totally up to you. Make it you, make it stand out, that's all that matters! Good luck, and I'll see you on the runway for the big premiere. Bye!
the queens scatter around the workroom in small clusters as they go over ideas
šŸSteph CF: For our challenge this week, we are taking part in "Robbed: The Musical". Using a song of our choice, we have to rewrite sixteen lines to tell the story of how we got sent home. If you saw Season Three, you know all too well that I had thoughts, feelings, and concerns about how my time there ended. My only concern here is how to squeeze all of these thoughts into just sixteen lines. I could do fifty, and still have more to say!
Whorechata: So, what am I supposed to do for this challenge? I never really got eliminated.
Sue: Right! I forgot about that. I guess you eliminated yourself.
Whorechata: How do I make that work for this challenge, that's the question.
šŸWhorechata CF: Everyone else has been eliminated, got the axe, got thrown to the curb. And then there's me. Luckily, I feel more confident with a verse challenge than I could for any other challenge. When I put my pen to paper, none of these queens can come close to me. But it's hard to reference your journey and elimination when you quit on the second episode. I'll make it work though, know that!
Blondie and Fleur have a heart to heart by the mirrors
Blondie: I know there's tension between us, and that might never change. But I want you to know that there's an olive branch from me to you.
Fleur: Why would I want a stick?
Blondie: I-, that's not what that means.
Fleur: Girl, I know.
Blondie: Where did things go wrong between us?
Fleur: We both want to be the top bitch. And we know that there isn't enough room in the spotlight for the both of us. For me? Absolutely. But you...yeah, no.
Blondie: I just don't get that. We have the same friends, we work the same shows. There's no reason to keep things between us so fractured.
Fleur: Maybe one day. But right now, I don't know if it's the right time.
Blondie: I'm fine with that. It doesn't need to be immediate, I just want to know that you're willing to get there eventually.
šŸFleur CF: As much as it pains me to admit, Blondie and I do have a lot in common. There's just something about this competition that makes it hard for me to connect with people. Some call it competitive spirit, most just call it being a bitch. I'm not closing the door on a friendship between Blondie and I, but I'm not opening it either. Not yet at least.
Morgs and Anthyy style their wigs for the challenge as they go over last minute ideas
šŸMorgs CF: Anthyy is the one person here that I know I can trust. Seeing her win would make me so happy, and I know she feels the same about me winning.
Anthyy: Sister, what song are you doing for this?
Morgs: There are a few rap songs that I think I could do well with.
Anthyy: You always do well with those, that might be the perfect option!
Morgs: But then another part of me feels like that would just be a convenient way of ending up safe again. I'm questioning whether or not it makes sense to go with what I know, or if I'm in a spot where I have to take a risk.
Anthyy: I feel the same way. If you took a risk and it didn't work, do you think you would be able to convince people to keep you?
Morgs: That's the thing, I don't. I feel like you wouldn't send me home, but that's it. I can't trust anyone else to save me.
Anthyy: What's your riskier option?
Morgs: Aretha Franklin.
Anthyy: Byeeee!
Morgs: I know, I know! It's not what you'd expect from me.
Anthyy: And that's why it makes total sense. You need to believe in yourself. Give them the full Morgs fantasy, and they'll live!
Morgs: Ah, you convinced me! I'm doing Aretha.
Anthyy: Our top two moment incoming!
šŸMorgs CF: I feel like I have nothing to lose at this point. If I'm ever gonna take a risk, now's the time to do it. Pray for your girl, she needs a miracle right about now!
Runway
the lights flicker and an electric magenta light floods the runway as Micro struts down the center
Micro Episode 6 Look
Micro: Welcome back to the runway of Micro's Drag Race: All Stars! This week, the queens were tasked with rewriting a song to tell the story of how they lost their original season. And joining me on the judging panel tonight is not only an MDR legend, but a fantastic verse writer, and the winner of Micro's Drag Race vs The World, Jords!
Jords Guest Judging Look
Micro: Jords, thank you for being here!
Jords: Thank you, I'm so excited to crush some dreams.
Micro: How has life been since taking home the crown?
Jords: You know what they say, club, another club, bus, no sleep. Except this is on Discord, so not exactly like that, but you get the idea!
Micro: Are you ready to get started?
Jords: I told you I'm not staying in this corset for more than an hour, let's get to it!
Micro: Without further ado, here is "Robbed: The Musical"!
Robbed: The Musical
-------------------------
Micro: Category is..."Chain Reaction".
"Bad Juju" by Jujubee plays
Anthyy: When i heard the category was chains i got a bit scared cause first i had an idea to do a bad bitch look! But then i realized probably everyone is gonna do that! So my mind went to a diffrent thign! When i dont know what to do i always look for inspiration in my culture! PURR POLISH BITCH! In Poland, you can easily say that in the whole europe, knights were EVERYWHERE so tonight i decided to serve you a knight look HONEY i am drippinnggg in chains! From head to toe i am a silver sparkling dream! And i know miss micr loves them sparkles so i made sure she is BADAZZLED for the gods! I did a lil leg and a hip reveal so she can have her sexy moment! And ofc i am carrying a sword caue i am a fighter. I really liked going back to the more haute couture side of anthyy since reently i focused my looks much more on the drag side so this was a nice comeback! And you kno im a sucker for gowns!
Anthyy Look
Blondie: Tonight I am giving full shame and guilt. Every since I taken a break from my season, I realize I have a lot of internal thinking and shame of the things I did on my season. Giving up so easily when I know I was in the right for most of my arguments and being manipulated into thinking I'm the problem when you just wanted Greentree to win so y'all robbed me. Tonight I am wearing beautiful Thai silk fantasy and got this beautiful styled red hair and have it locked up and chained up all over my body. You want me to feel shame, well come unlock my chain, baby
Blondie Look
Fleur: Tonight I decided to fuse rich and affluence with sex and fornication and I have to admit, I am a HUGE fan of this result! I am feeling so fancy and so lush with all this gold and skin! Thank the lord that fashion tape exists because without that, who knows how these chains will stay perfectly in place. I am EATING. I am so happy to be wearing this look the one week in this competition, where I feel somewhat confident!
Fleur Look
Morgs: BAM, on the runway i'm coming out, skinny, beautiful, and a bad girl. this is a total different direction than morgetha franklin you saw during the challenge. i have some devily horns on too, obviously decked out with chains, matching the rest draped AWL over my body. i look stunning, i feel stunning, and if someone happened to wear this before i wore it better
Morgs Look
Steph: mama i am all chained up bc i am a crazy bitch who LOVES the chains. Bitch this is fashion and I want to show that I can be kinky and serve up some rich ho realness honey!!
Steph Look
Sue: Tonight I am serving you gothic bad ass biatch. She is a huntress on a mission to obliterate all the men who did her dirty.
Sue Look
Whorechata: Tonight on the runway I am representing what many conservative folk would say is ā€œmy cultureā€. I am giving orange is the New Mexican tonight mawma. She got the ball and chain and limping on this runway… but tbh that’s not a new thing for chata on the runway.
Whorechata Look
Wren: Trying to make my own runway this was a truly humbling experience, sometimes things dont go as planned and that’s ok. However, if I’m going to go with something I didn’t make myself I want to make sure it’s one of the best things you’ve ever seen. This look wowed me from the moment I first saw it and it is absolutely gorgeous, stunning, and conceptual. Zendaya truly devoured, as always.
Wren Look
Zodya: For this runway, I wanted to do something a little bit different. While most people would probably have the chains wrapped around their bodies or hanging off, I’m going for this chain pattern in this exquisite, high-fashion executive realness look. I feel extremely opulent in this moment, like I’m about to buy out a large company! And if you don’t like that? Chained to the walls of the company dungeon!!!
Zodya Look
Critiques
Micro: Thank you ladies. Tonight, you all really blew me away!
Jords: I need to echo that. AMAZING job on the stage tonight. You all did amazing and it will be very hard to be choosing the placements. Very honored and excited to be judging tonight!
Micro: So tonight, you will each be receiving critiques.
Micro: First up, Anthyy!
Jords: BESTIE! So excited to see how far youā€˜ve come after Season 1. For your look, this is definitely one of the looks Iā€˜m liking the most. Itā€˜s giving me very much warrior. You know those games we used to play back in the day in that castle and there was like a fighter holding you from entering the other room? Yeah, thatā€˜s you in new edition. And for your Musical performance… you ate that. I think the song choice is very um… UNIQUE. Sorry, I donā€˜t really connect good things with that name. Anyway, I found your lyrics smart and memorable, I kinda got stuck with what parts you were relating to, but then I got the hang of it and then loved it even more.
Micro: Anthyy baby, you might have just outwrote BeyoncĆ©. Well, I don’t know if she writes her own stuff but if she does, you did that! I thought the flow was amazing, and you had so many call backs to your original season, and such a smart song choice for this Unieke moment! My one critique would be that it felt like certain lines were condensed in a way that really fit the flow, but weakened the line itself by removing certain little transition words. On the runway, this is sensational. I love the hip cutouts and the shoulder pieces. One of my favorite looks from you ever!
Micro: Next, Blondie!
Jords: Hey Blondie! On the look, I like how the chains connect the whole look. It starts from your foot to the head and roses, so I really found that cool. Your musical performance, I think you started really strong. The song was a little something else from what the others have presented I think, you served a lot of comedy. Thereā€˜s some little, very little things I would change, but overall I think you did a good job.
Micro: Imma be so real, my expectations for what you could do this week were a little low. You weren’t exactly a rapstress on Season Six, but this was so well done. This song has a lot of little moments within it that you were able to capitalize on. And it had splashes of humor and controversy that you’re known so well for. On the runway, I think this look is beautiful, and the commentary gagged me a bit. I thought you were in your apology era but then you went right back to serving cunt, we love to see it. Great night for you.
Micro: Next up, Fleur!
Jords: Hey Fleur! With this runway look, you are so rich and you are representing the girls. It just ate. You have clear taste, we been knew. Your musical verse. Iā€˜ll say it was a good attempt. It was a verse that was really deep, but it wasnā€˜t that special for me.
Micro: The vibe of this song has such a dark and melancholy feel to it, which worked so well for this challenge, and the feelings of reliving that loss. It really told the journey of who you were back on Season One, and then how you had that redemption moment on Season Four, but ultimately falling short of the crown. All the boxes are checked, this was a great performance. On the runway, this connects with me so hardcore. The draped chain look, the big headpiece and sculpted hair, the fur coat, it’s a dream look for me. For me, your best week so far!
Micro: Next, Morgs!
Jords: Morgs! Iā€˜m very impressed by you. This chains look is just so advanced and so beautiful. You went full force. As well as in the musical. I imagined it very well, you performing with that song playing. I like what you had brought tonight.
Micro: Morgs, you are such an incredible writer, and I could tell that this week was a moment for you to break out of that safe streak and really shine. First off, the song choice was amazing. And you stayed true to what the challenge asked for with the references to your season and elimination, not going too far into that bitch track territory. You played off of all the subtleties and syllables of the original to pack this full of great content. On the runway, this is a gorgeous look. Having this cage element made of chains, it’s a clever and high fashion moment.
Micro: Next up, Steph!
Jords: Steph, Steph, Steph. Your runway with the chains, chains everywhere! I like it. But your verse… it didnā€˜t stick out to me, Iā€˜m sorry. It didnā€˜t fullfill my expectations, I got the hang of what you were trying to do, but I didnā€˜t really get through the whole performance without asking myself ā€žWhyā€œ like, 3 times.
Micro: Steph, you made me so proud this week!! I know your elimination on Season Three wasn’t the best time for you, but I do think it has pushed you in this competition to perform at a really elite level. You sold the vibe and the fantasy of what that challenge was and your thought process through your elimination. There’s not much else I can really say, you killed it. If I have to nitpick, I’d say that the end loses steam a little bit, but only because the first half is so strong. On the runway, I think this is maybe the best you’ve looked! It’s simple but executed flawlessly. Great work.
Micro: Next up, Sue!
Jords: Moving on to Sue! Your chains look, it was kind of different and it had something that made me memorize it well. Your performance… I kind of found it hard to keep up. It was a good song choice, I did see you performing it, donā€˜t worry. But I think you could have done even more.
Micro: Sue, let me start off with this song choice. Choosing the song you were eliminated on during Season Four, how did nobody else think to do that?! It was a really smart move. I can tell you were comfortable with this challenge, because every line had that natural flow and swagger to it. The lyrics were so true to you and your spirit, and the rhythm of the song kind of played into that feeling of running away from elimination and trying to save yourself. And on the runway, this is amazing. I love the movement that the chains bring in, and this skeletal corset vibe is next level. I’m not the biggest fan of the purple veil, but this is a great look.
Micro: Next, Whorechata Grande!
Jords: Hey, Whorechata! This look looks like itā€˜s self-drawn. I think the story behind it is very smart and very easy to think about what it could mean. Perfect, thatā€˜s it. And for the musical, girl, you turned it into a party. I was in my seat like… twerks.
Micro: Whorechata, you are like a chicken. I take you out of the freezer, and you start to thaw. Last week, you warmed up, and this week, you were burning hot. This was start to finish, an incredible week for you. Every beat was hit, the flow was immaculate, and you balanced being able to hype yourself up, but also get real about your time on Season Five. On the runway, this look is so so good. The heavy chains around the ankles especially, that really works for me. If I had to nitpick, I think the hair color throws me off a little bit, and I wish she had a chain necklace or earrings to kinda tie the top half to the bottom half, but this was truly your week.
Micro: Next up, Wren Wyvern!
Jords: Wren, Wren, Wren. Iā€˜m going to start with the runway. Letā€˜s break it down. When you see A first, you remember it. Then comes B. And when B is very similar to A, you like one more. Thatā€˜s exactly what it is between you and Anthyy. You both did armor-related looks. This look from Zendaya, my queen 'till the day I collapse, is very iconic. But I think this is one of the looks I like the least tonight. This verse made me think you used AI. Because you used some words that Jesus didnā€˜t even hear before he got crucified, Amen. I found it very funny, and you gave us something to run with, so good job on that.
Micro: Wren the rap star is back! You have a great understanding of music and verse writing, and are able to execute challenges like this phenomenally. The rhyme structure of the original song isn’t all that simple, it has little quirks, and that’s tough to write around. But you managed to pull it off, and pull it off really well. On the runway, this isn’t my favorite. Objectively, it’s a beautiful look. I will say though that MET Gala looks for me tend to just come off as a little expected. At this point in the competition, I have to pick at the tiny things.
Micro: Last but not least, Zodya!
Jords: Zodya! Well, while others used chains that were actually build into their look, you used it as a pattern. And I actually would have liked it more had you used a look that did so as well, because it gives it more a better vibe. I liked your verse a lot. It was so good. Nothing more to say, like damn she ate that.
Micro: Zodya, back with the Gaga! You are an incredible verse writer, undefeated so far. Tonight was no exception. Your lines all hit, and there was not a single error in the flow of it. Picking at the tiny things, I think the chorus didn’t give you many chances to change it in a major way. Such a small issue, but every little detail is being looked at under a microscope right now. On the runway, this was a really unique take. Opting to go for a chain pattern instead of actual chains, I don’t know how I feel about it! It’s something I haven’t seen before and I love that it gives you this polished look. Maybe I’m missing that industrial and metal vibe that real chains would’ve brought in, but it’s great for what it is.
Micro: Thank you queens. Based on your performances tonight, I've made some decisions. When I call your name, please step forward.
Micro: Anthyy, Blondie, Fleur, Steph, Sue, Wren, and Zodya. Great work this week, you are all safe.
šŸFleur CF: Wait...what?
Micro: Morgs, Whorechata. Congratulations, you are the top two queens of the week!
the queens congratulate Morgs and Whorechata while looking shocked over everyone being safe
šŸMorgs CF: Well oh my gosh, I won!! And for it to happen on a week where I just let loose completely, it makes me feel so good. If you want the real me, here it is!
šŸWhorechata CF: My win era has arrived, it feels right!
Micro: Now, I hate a non-elimination week. You all know this, I know this, the lady down the street knows this. But when you deliver at a level like this, you leave me no other choice. I want to see more from each and every one of you. However, there will still be a lipsync. The winner of the lipsync will receive a significant advantage in the next challenge. Trust me, you want this one. Head on back to Untucked and get ready, I'll see you shortly!
Untucked
the queens enter Untucked
Morgs: Oh my damn, oh my damn!
šŸMorgs CF: I won my first challenge! This is my first time being in the top since the first episode. The risk to do Aretha paid off, and I'm so glad I made that decision. And it's honestly the perfect week to win, because I don't need to worry about making someone mad at me. I need to do a little happy dance or something, this is the best feeling!
Steph: Somebody better quit to make these numbers go down!
Wren: I felt that.
Sue: I was really doubting myself this week, so getting positive feedback and being safe, such a relief.
Anthyy: I feel that way, just flipped a little bit. I felt really good about my verse, and love my runway. But the critiques were a little shaky. I'm so grateful for everyone being safe, I'm not ready to land in the bottom!
Wren: Anthyy, Zodya. This is nothing against the two of you, but-
Zodya: Here we go.
Wren: It is a little frustrating that the week where you finally get mixed critiques, there's no bottoms. It feels interesting to me, that's all!
Steph: Oop.
šŸWren CF: I believe that there was some tricks going on behind the scenes this week. I thought Zodya was the weakest, and by quite a lot to be honest. But she's won three challenges already, Micro can't risk her going home. It feels all too convenient that this was the week for nobody to go home.
Zodya: I'll be the first to admit that I wasn't in the best headspace this week. We've been here for awhile now, it got to me.
Wren: I think it mainly annoys me because just based off of critiques, I think I was next in line to be in the top. But now we're all safe, and it puts me and you on the same level.
Zodya: Is that a bad thing? Micro and Jords both said how well we all did.
Wren: I disagree with me being placed the same as everyone else, that's it.
Zodya: You can't just say "that's it" and expect the conversation to be over.
Wren: Well, I would like it to be over.
šŸZodya CF: If Micro gave me a free pass this week, then let me just say a quick thank you and get back to the competition. But based on the critiques, I don't think that's what happened. When Wren wins the challenge, the judging makes total sense. But whenever she doesn't win, there's some conspiracy behind it. I know we've been here for a long time, but are the fumes getting to you?
Anthyy: I don't have anything else to say about that. We all slayed, we can just move on!
Sue: I do want to ask Fleur about her part in the musical. Was that actually how you feel?
Fleur: I mean...maybe a little.
Sue: Even on Season Four, I didn't know how much pressure you put on yourself after Season One.
Fleur: I came into that season so confident, but I gave up on myself. When you feel people cheering for you, and you can't take it all the way, it makes you feel like you disappointed them.
Anthyy: You didn't disappoint anyone on Season One!
Fleur: No, I know I disappointed myself at least.
šŸFleur CF: I take what I do very seriously, and I really care about the legacy I leave behind. If I don't live up to the expectations I set for myself, it makes me feel like it's not even worth trying.
Fleur: I'm scared of that following me. I want people to see me for who I am now, not what I was doing then.
Blondie: You have no idea how much sense this is making.
Fleur: Really?
Blondie: Absolutely. The thing is, people will feel how they feel, and you can't change that. But when you start living in the moment and start this new path for yourself, they'll have no choice but to see you for who you are now. If you don't want them to focus on the past, you can't focus on it either.
šŸZodya CF: And that is what we call a breakthrough!
the queens return to the runway
Micro: Welcome back ladies! Will the top two queens please step forward.
Morgs Lipsync Look
Whorechata Lipsync Look
Micro: Morgs, Whorechata. Prior to tonight, you were asked to prepare a lipsync performance of ā€œI Believe in a Thing Called Loveā€ by The Darkness.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tKjZuykKY1I
Micro: This is your chance to impress me, and earn an advantage in the next challenge.
šŸMorgs CF: Eek, the nerves are starting to show up! I wasn't exactly a lipsync assassin on Season Three. But I've been working on my moves, and I think I can put up a good fight. Hope for the best!
šŸWhorechata CF: Finally, this is a song I can perform to! If y'all would've given me Fifth Harmony again, I would've walked out that door and never looked back.
"Can't explain all the feelings that you're making me feel
My heart's in overdrive and you're behind the steering wheel"
Morgs struts on out commanding the stage, she's got a REAL bad girl energy in her and you can tell it from the way she walks to the nasty glare in her eyes. She positions herself in the center of the stage and lip syncs like a preoccupied teenage boy
Whorechata does a little shimmy, feeling the music
"Touching you, touching me
Touching you,
God, you're touching me"
Morgs starts to shift from bratty to sultry as she looks over and attempts to grasp the air over to her opponent. She then feels her freaky pigtails sizzling it up. She then reaches over to her opponent again, then Morgs jiggly body starts to move to the rhythm, matching up to the beat
Whorechata does a little shimmy, feeling the music
"I believe in a thing called love
Just listen to the rhythm of my heart
There's a chance we could make it now
We'll be rocking 'til the sun goes down
I believe in a thing called love, hoo-ooh"
Morgs jumps into the air landing knee first on the ground and bobbing her head along. She spreads her legs open across the stage and shakes her hands enthusiastically near her heart area. She then shifts her body to the side as she drags herself across the stage doing a high kick in the air as she jumps back up on her feet. She then shimmies herself down to the ground with a sensual ā€˜shh’ motion to her lips. On the last line she does a fierce back bend as the loveee line progresses and she then reaches for her guitar for the solo. Its a freaky guitar btw, bright pink
Whorechata does a little shimmy, feeling the music
šŸŽ¶Guitar sološŸŽ¶
Morgs plays her guitar matching the solo as it plays. She gets freakful to the music and moves across the stage truly making her stage presence known as she does some stunts throughout this like some back leans to the side and high kicks. She makes eye contact with her audience. throughout and they can tell that Morgs is NOT here to play games. She ends the guitar solo by making it look like she’s playing it with her tongue (very good at that) as rolls her tongue against it’s strings before throwing it back on her back
Whorechata does a little shimmy, feeling the music
"Touching you, touching me
Touching you,
God, you're touching me, ohh"
Morgs feels the sultry sensual rhythms again as she scurries off, she's such a bad bad girl and its showing in her whole aura. Morgs then makes her body jiggle by pumping it in line with the beat. Morgs then bawls her hands in a fist a pulsates them in a motion close to her heart, she then moves her hand down to her freakum as she vibrates her hand in that area making the ohh motion as she goes into a backbend in which she just barely touches the ground
Whorechata does a little shimmy, feeling the music
"I believe in a thing called love
Just listen to the rhythm of my heart
There's a chance we could make it now
We'll be rocking 'til the sun goes down
I believe in a thing called love"
Morgs then back flips up into her original position with her two feet on the ground (also a trained gymnast). She beams along to the music, feeling the rock star moment as she moves herself across the stage on all sides and to the back to the other queens watching as she interacts with them a little bit. She shakes her head hard along to the music. Morgs then grabs the guitar from behind her back as she is still in the back of the stage
Whorechata does a little shimmy, feeling the music
šŸŽ¶Guitar sološŸŽ¶
As the solo starts Morgs, now holding the guitar, slides from the back of the stage all the way to the front playing the guitar violently and excitedly as she bangs her head along. As the song comes to a close with the breakdown, Morgs destroys the guitar by banging it all in one place on the stage in a rapidfire motion and as the last beat plays, she falls into a hard front facing split with her head on the ground and she points to the sky with her right index finger as she has finished putting on a concert for the girls. From the guitar holds a paper that says ā€œSharris was robbedā€ with a wink she goes back to her spot
Whorechata does a little shimmy, feeling the music
Micro: Whew, rock on!! That was a great performance...from one of you. I've made my decision.
...
...
Micro: Morgs, you're a winner, baby! You have won a significant advantage in the next challenge.
Morgs: Thanks a bunch!
Micro: Whorechata, you are safe.
Whorechata: Did all that just to be safe, just say you hate me!
Micro: Nine queens remain, and you all are the best of the best. Keep up the momentum, and give it your all. From here on out, at least one of you will be going home each week. Do not get comfortable. Now, let the music play!
"Banjo" by Bebe Zahara Benet plays
Next Time on Micro's Drag Race: All Stars
šŸWren CF: I wouldn't say that I necessarily want to recite the entire Book of Mormon. It's more of a need. What is my life!?
Morgs notices a box on her workroom station that holds her advantage for the challenge
Sue: This is just me getting everything I could possibly want. You get a Kylie, you get a Kylie!
Lily: This was in really poor taste, and it went entirely too far.
Track Record
Cast Shot w/ Placements
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2023.06.04 23:06 Suitable_Food_2535 Really bad muscle pain on Vyvanse but don’t want to stop

I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was 23 years old and I’m 53 now. I’ve pretty much tried all the medications. Luckily, the therapist that diagnosed me 30 years ago was a great CBT therapist and he helped me a lot. At the time there was only Ritalin, so I took that. I stopped taking anything for years, due to a variety of reasons but started needed meds again recently. Vyvanse was the only drug that really helped. Ritalin and Adderall (and anything that were variants) just made me ā€œbuzzyā€. Vyvanse helped right away. The problem is it gave me muscle pain-the kind that comes from tightness. Neck, shoulders, hands, legs. It even made me retain urine, I couldn’t get all of my pee out until I didn’t take it for two days. My doctor doesn’t believe me, but because I really want to keep taking it, I keep trying. Same results. I’ve tried, 30,40, 50mg. I drink water, take magnesium and vitamin D and try electrolytes. I see others with this issue, has anyone else figured this out?
submitted by Suitable_Food_2535 to VyvanseADHD [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:05 ellewoods333 Pain 3.5 months PO

I had a really uncomplicated recovery and felt better very quickly after surgery. I haven’t had any issues working out, working, or even with sex. Then on Friday afternoon, I walked about a mile to a baseball game and didn’t have a seat so I had stand for 2.5 hours out in the heat. I started feeling super nauseous and having pains in my side. I made it home okay and assumed I was dehydrated and maybe pushed too hard. But then today I’ve been having stabbing pains off and on again, and when I went to the bathroom just now, I barely pushed things I need to šŸ’©and I had a blinding and shooting pain. It’s still throbbing and I’m worried something is wrong. Has anyone had pain this far out after being completely fine?
submitted by ellewoods333 to hysterectomy [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:05 theoeaayah788 Hey, I’m doing gcse language tomorrow, I’ve been practicing descriptive language, this is what I wrote for question 5 in about 20 minutes. Is there anything I could improve on or change. Or if I have done anything wrong. Id appreciate it thanks

Hey, I’m doing gcse language tomorrow, I’ve been practicing descriptive language, this is what I wrote for question 5 in about 20 minutes. Is there anything I could improve on or change. Or if I have done anything wrong. Id appreciate it thanks submitted by theoeaayah788 to GCSE [link] [comments]


2023.06.04 23:04 Alive_Struggle9858 What is mania like for you?

I'm exploring the possibility of having bp2, but im trying to be honest with myself and not malinger. Im getting started with a psych soon but ive been nerding out on psychiatry and the bipolar spectrum so i hope its ok to ponder this. Not seeking a diagnosis just curious about other peoples experiences especially with hypo.
My sleep is pretty much always fucked and, if I were to be bipolar, it would seem that i sleep worse/less in my depressive periods than my hypo periods. I honestly dont think i can say ive ever completely lost a need for sleep, i always feel it after a few days. Ive been tracking my sleep on FitBit since December and generally i sleep like 4-5 hours a night. But sometimes this goes down to 1-3 and after about 4 days or a week of that i tend to crash for a day or 2 and feel more unstable and depressed. I do abuse caffeine and weed tho, however my reactions to these seem to vary greatly
There have been 3 instances in my life where my appetite magically decreases and dieting becomes easier, i drop weight without meaning to, but most of the time i am totally preoccupied with food even when i am "up." I struggle with bulimia, binge eating/compulsive overeating, and yo yo dieting.
I definitely have pressured speech but its hard to say whether that's exclusive to me being "up" or not.
There are times when im more social but im generally a little disagreeable and sometimes my "up" phases are accompanied by increased isolation as i feel i have a special, higher purpose to work towards and will only be brought down by others . So idk if thats hypo or any type of mania thing since it seems like most ppl when they're "up" just become complete social butterflies. Also when im "up" i still need to use alcohol as a social lubricant, awkward when around others who are just chilling and not drinking, and that usually ends in embarrassment for me
What i can definitely say tho is that there are times when my mindset, goals, and self perception are elevated. I become ambitious, motivated, confident, focused, even obsessive. I stop hating myself, feel spiritually significant, begin to feel worthy of the lofty goals and ambitions i set for myself. It becomes easier to do what I need to do to get where i want to get, and i do want, and i do try. But then it just goes away and im back to feeling worthless and undeserving, lose motivation and focus, my visions for my lift shift from expansive, positive, optimistic, and creative to fantasies of self destruction and suicide. Most recent experience of this was becoming extremely Christian, obsess about God and the Bible, intensely and emotionally spiritual, not want to talk to anyone about anything other than that and definitelyhaving pressured speech about it and also getting irritable/emotional at people disagreeing with me, nonstop consuming really intense Christian online content that i currently cant even stomach, buying a bunch of Christian clothing brand stuff and things like a purity ring (l. O. Fucking. L!) and redirecting my life vision to being "a faithful servant of God" and imagining myself becoming the voice of the generation bringing people to Jesus lol. I remember suddenly "feeling really good" but i wasnt sleeping any less and i wasnt necessarily working like a machine or anything. Then one day it just snapped and I went back to my self destructive habits (bulimia, weed, alcohol, sex) and started hating myself again and feeling undeserving of anything good, at first i had this mental feeling of demons pulling me down that i definitely made up, but then eventually i just felt empty and spiritually void and like none of it was ever even real. Thats honestly whats made me realize im weird and unstable af even tho that is deffinitely not even the worst its been in my life. Honestly its hard to imagine ever feeling so hopeful and confident again especially now that im starting to see that these moments could just be a result of a mental disorder. -_- then again, maybe ive just been young and dumb and those are normal parts of getting older? Idk nobody sees anything wrong but people have no idea how painful it is to be unable to trust myself and realize that i will always go back to depression that gets worse every time.
Tl;dr dae primarily experience mania as an uplifted mindset and spiritual essence vs any concrete symptoms of reduced sleep/appetite?
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