I am not the Original Poster. That is u/No_Buy_4881. She posted in AmItheAsshole.
Trigger Warning: ummm... nonconsensual lactation kink?
Mood Spoiler: yikes on fucking bikes
Original Post: May 28, 2023
I have a 7 month old baby boy, I'm breastfeeding but baby is currently weaning.
I'm convinced that my FIL is being weird about my breastfeeding and not in a "that makes me uncomfortable" way.
I made the baby popsicles from my boob milk a few months ago and FIL put in the group chat that "I'd love to try one of those" with a hearts as eyes emoji. I said "WTF they're made from breast milk" and he said he didn't notice that caption.
Today I baked the baby some muffins. It's a recipe that called for a half cup of breast milk so I made them per recipe. FIL came over unannounced and said "oh yum, someone's been baking" so I told him "those muffins are for the baby, they're just fruit, flour and breast milk. I have a normal cake we can have".
I then left the room to wash my hands, came back and one of the muffins was missing. I asked husband and he had no idea so I asked FIL and he said that he ate it. I said that's disgusting, I told him they were the babies and contained breast milk. He doubled down and said it's ok because "breast milk is vegan" (note, no one in this story is vegan). I told him he's a creepy pervert and to get the fuck out my house.
Husband is baffled by the whole thing and was convinced it was a misunderstanding even though I explicitly said they're made with breast milk.
FIL said I'm a dick because I'd made loads and the baby wouldn't miss out.
MIL was blowing up my phone until I asked her if she was really ok with FIL drinking milk that came direct from my breast, I think she didn't get the whole story.
My sisters say it's fucking gross and FIL is a weirdo.
Relevant Comments:
Lots of comments (and judgements) on what recipes she is using/why she would be:
"It's definitely not completely out the realms of normal when it comes to baby weaning. If you look up BLW recipes a lot of them use breast milk and advise you can use formula instead (but we don't have formula in the house)."
"https://mummytodex.com/banana-and-kiwi-muffins-for-babies/
We haven't introduced eggs yet so we just do extra bananas. We also sub out the kiwi for whatever other fruit we have lying around (weaning is so much waste!) and never had them turn out bad."
Use formula:
"Baby has CMPA (editor's note: Cow's milk protein allergy) and I'm anaphylactic to nuts so we can't have most substitutes in the house. I've tried water before but it isn't thick enough and I don't want to double up oil."
"I'm not buying oat milk to go off (it's only 1/2 cup for the recipe) when the whole point is to reduce food waste."
Homelander?
"I have no idea what homelander is, if it's on TV then it will have passed me right by. I only get screen time when baby is feeding and I don't enjoy watching shows on my phone screen"
OOP is voted NTA
Update (Same Post): 8 hours later
I asked my husband what he thought I was mad about (he was in the room but on the other side and occupied with the baby) and he said he didn't realise that his dad actually ate the muffin, he thought I was pissed because he was messing with them. He also didn't remember the group chat incident but agreed that both incidents together is creepy.
I called MIL to "clear the air" and she revealed that FIL has always been "very interested" in lactation and she actually only fed husband for 4 months and always behind a locked door! Apparently he moved jobs after a woman complained that he kept intruding on her pumping in a designated space in the office
I've told them FIL is not welcome around me and have asked for the key to our house back.
I shared the concerns about him tampering with my milk (and contaminating it) and also that if his own wife wanted him locked out then I'm entitled to that too.
The comment that hit my husband was the one about FIL getting off for years on the memory of eating the gross AF baby muffin. Husband said he won't be able to look FIL in the eye again.
Relevant Comments:
More on MIL:
"I wouldn't say MIL is on my side, she told me this information in a way that sounded like it was totally normal for a man to need to be locked away from women when they're feeding babies and I kind of brought this on myself for not locking him out.I am actually really creeped that he's possibly been able to perv on me feeding at their house. I go to another room but I've never felt comfortable, guess they'll need to wait until the baby is fully weaned until we visit there again (if we ever do)."
To clarify- did MIL feed FIL for months behind a locked door???
"No, she fed my infant husband. My FIL creeped her out so much she got a lock for the door."
He'll make a copy of the key:
"Oh the new locks are a given. Asking for the keys is a symbolic thing and also gives me all the justification for completely losing my shit when I inevitability get a notification saying he's trying to open my door."

I have a lot of pineapple chunks (cut from fruit, not canned) that are overripe and do not taste that great to eat. I've been looking at some recipes including pound cakes, cakes with pineapple cream, pineapple bread pudding to use them, but I was wondering if there was a way to use them in dishes.
For example, I've heard you can blend up pineapples and use them to soak meat to make them super tender. I'm thinking of doing this but with chicken instead, but I have no idea how it'll go since I've never done it before.
​
How might you use a bunch of pineapples in my situation?

Since this sub was so helpful in planning, I wanted to share my itinerary and trip report! We had an incredible first time in Japan and I can't wait to go back.
Couldn't fit our (very detailed) itinerary in this post, but if you'd like to download it's here.
Medium article version with photos + itinerary is here.
And our shareable Google map is here.
About us:

• We’re New Yorkers in our 30s who have been planning this trip for about 6 months.
• My bf has been learning Japanese for about a year, and I’ve been learning for about 5 months (a mix of Pimsleur and Duolingo).
• Boyfriend is into history and baseball, I'm into skincare and nature, but we’re both big on food so that was our number one priority.
• He has a peanut allergy and avoids all nuts. He learned to say that in Japanese (私はピーナッツアレルギーがあります - "Watashi wa piinattsu arerugī ga arimasu”), and every restaurant and hotel was understanding and careful. Luckily most cuisine is nut-free anyway, but we managed not to have any close calls in 2 weeks which is amazing.

Some overall learnings:

• If I were planning this trip again, I think I would skip Kanazawa. It was a lovely town and the food was amazing, but we wished we had spent that time with a night or two in Osaka instead of just making it a day trip from Kyoto.
• Even if you’re not a baseball fan, Japanese baseball games are so much fun. I’ve never experienced anything like it.
• I packed a suitcase and brought a fold-up duffel bag, and halfway through the trip I moved my clothes to the duffel and just used the suitcase for souvenirs. It was a great idea but we ended up buying an extra suitcase at Donki our last day anyway.
• We both felt a bit underdressed compared to locals, especially in Tokyo. I wish I’d packed more dresses, skirts and trousers and fewer jeans and tees - the only people I saw wearing sweats, athletic wear or cutoffs were other tourists. Obviously you can wear what you want, just be aware you’ll stick out! Also, women are generally more covered up, even on warmer days, to protect their skin from the sun.
• If you go clothes shopping, take your shoes off in dressing rooms. I made a right fool of myself.
• Clothes sizing is wildly different in Japan. Know your cm measurements! Your size here may be hurtful to your ego.
• People line up to get on the train (check the ground for a guide of where to stand) and let everyone off before they get on. This seems obvious, but I’ve been living in New York so long that I wanted to weep tears of joy every time.
• If you’re new to sitting showers: there are two buttons. One is to fill up a bowl of water, and the other is to turn on the handheld shower head. Both automatically turn off a minute after you turn them on, but you can also turn them off manually. You sit on the little stool and there’s usually a mirror in front of you, which is… a humbling experience. There are usually also scrubbing washcloths.
• The worst train station toilet was still nicer than a goddamn Nordstrom bathroom. It was a pleasure to have IBS in Japan.
• At many European and American historical sites, you pay a hefty flat fee to see everything. In Japan, you can usually get into the temple grounds for free, then pay for each individual building you go into. Most were 400-700y/person, which felt really reasonable.
• We came at an almost perfect time (mid-May) weather-wise. Most days it was clear or sunny with a high in the mid-seventies. We definitely got some rain, but less than we were expecting (maybe 3-4 rainy days and 5-6 rainy nights).

Hotel Reviews:
Tokyu Stay Shinjuku Eastside (Tokyo): This was a great basic hotel, close to plenty of transportation and right on the edge of Kabukicho. The buffet breakfast was the highlight - a great mix of Western and Japanese breakfast options, including a great miso soup.Hakone Airu (Hakone): Mixed review here. On the one hand, the in-room onsen and public onsen were both wonderful, and the service was extraordinary. On the other hand, the mix of Balinese and Japanese didn’t quite work, and dinner and breakfast were more confusing than enjoyable.Hotel Alza (Kyoto): By far our favorite stay. I can’t recommend this place enough, and it was definitely worth paying a little extra. They brought us an amazing bento breakfast in our rooms every morning, they had every amenity we could need (they even re-upped the free sheet masks every day), and the micro-bubble bath at the end of a long day of walking was amazing.Koyasan Syukubo Ekoin Temple (Mt Koya): This was a great temple experience. Koyasan in general is obviously pretty tourist-y, but Eko-in still made it feel authentic, and dinner and breakfast were both amazing. Your stay includes a meditation class, morning prayers and a morning fire ritual, and you can pay to attend a cemetery tour, all of which were great.Utaimachi (Kanazawa): We were only here for two nights, but this place was pretty good. Very close to the Higashi Chaya area, where we didn’t actually end up spending much time. Always love tatami mat flooring, and the washedryer was a nice bonus, but we were also right next to the lobby and right under another room so there was some noise.The Gate Asakusa (Tokyo): A great and very Westernized hotel with amazing views of Shinso-ji and the surrounding area. It’s on the top floors of a building right in the middle of all things Asakusa, but is still pretty quiet. And has a wonderful, deep soaking tub with free bath salts.

Tuesday: Arrival, Shinjuku

1 PM: Arrival at Haneda
We got customs and immigration forms to fill out on the plane and everything went fairly quickly. Picked up some cash and Suica cards, went to see about taking the Airport Limousine bus ($10/each) but we should have booked in advance because there wasn’t one for another hour. We ended up taking a taxi (about $50) to our hotel in Shinjuku.
4 PM: Arrival at hotel - Tokyu Stay Shinjuku East Side
We dropped our luggage and went to a nearby eel restaurant, Shinjuku Unatetsu. The eel was incredible and not too filling. Wandered Kabuki-cho for a bit, I dragged my bf through all 4 floors of Don Quijote (I had a list of beauty items to pick up), then rested at the hotel.
7 PM: Dinner in Shinjuku (Tsunahachi)
We went to Tsunahachi for dinner and got some amazing tempura (I wish we had sat at the bar to watch it being made!) and then crashed by 9 pm, because we are young and cool.

Wednesday: Harajuku, Meiji, and Shibuya

7 AM: Hotel breakfast
Up early for hotel breakfast, which has convinced bf to start making miso soup every morning.
9 AM: Shinjuku Station - Pick up JR Passes
We went to Shinjuku station to pick up our JR passes, then spent 30 minutes finding the place where we could get them before 10 AM. There was a long line (staff shortage) so we waited about an hour but we got them and headed to Harajuku.
11 AM: Meiji Shrine & Yoyogi Park
We walked to Meiji Shrine, stopping at the gardens along the way (well worth the 500y entrance fee, especially on a beautiful day). We were lucky to come across a wedding at the shrine. Then we walked around Yoyogi Park a bit.
1 PM: Lunch (Gyoza Lou)
Walked into Gyoza Lou and were seated right away. Incredible gyoza as well as beer and bean sprouts with meat sauce - maybe 10 bucks total for 2 people.
1:30 PM: Shopping/museums in Harajuku
We split up so I could do some shopping in vintage stores - Flamingo, TAGTAG and Kinji (my favorite), and bf could go to the Ota Memorial Museum for their Cats in Ukiyo-e exhibit (which he loved). I walked down Takeshita street to meet him and managed to get a green tea, strawberry and red bean paste crepe from Marion Crepes.
3 PM: Shibuya Scramble & Hachinko Statue
We grabbed the train to Shibuya, saw the scramble and the Hachinko statue, then entered the maze that is Tokyu Hands. I got some onsen powders for gifts and some more cosmetics. My boyfriend checked out the Bic camera store and I went to Gu, which is like the love child of Uniqlo and Primark. I immediately undid all the “light packing” I did with new clothes.
7 PM: Dinner Reservation - Shinjuku Kappu Nakajima
I got us a reservation a few months ago at Shinjuku Kappu Nakajima. It was probably one of the best meals of my life. The omakase came out to less than $100usd each, which felt like a steal.
9 PM: Golden Gai bar (Bar Araku)
We wandered Golden Gai and went into a bar where the entrance fee was waived for foreigners called Bar Araku. It was very small but had great vibes, highly recommend. I drank too much sake, which will be a theme.

Thursday: Shinjuku

4 AM: Earthquake
The phone alerts are insanely loud! We rushed down to the hotel lobby and the only other people there were fellow foreigners - apparently Japanese people at the hotel knew a 5.1 is okay to sleep through.
9 AM: Shinjuku Gyoen
We strolled around in the sun taking photos for about 3 hours. Today is a lot less planned than yesterday - I kind of wish I’d switched the itineraries after how long getting the JR Pass took. We did go to the fancy Starbucks, of course.
12 PM: Lunch (Kaiten Sushi Numazuto)
We tried to go to a nearby sushi place but it was full, so we walked up to Kaiten Sushi Numazuto. We were a little disappointed it wasn’t actually conveyor belt sushi (the conveyor belt was for show and you ordered from the staff). Stopped in Bic camera afterwards for a bit.
2 PM: Ninja Trick House
We tried to go to the Samurai museum but learned it closed a few weeks ago. A good excuse to go to the Ninja Trick House instead. You’re thinking: “Isn’t that place for children?” Yes. Yes it is. And we loved every minute. I now have a camera roll full of myself being terrible at throwing stars. The dream.
3 PM: Don Quijote
More Don Quijote, mostly to get out of the rain. Got my last few beauty products I really wanted and a few souvenirs. An overstimulating heaven.
6 PM: 3-hour Shinjuku Foodie Tour
We signed up for a 3-hour “foodie tour” of Shinjuku that stopped at a sushi place, a Japanese bbq spot with insane wagyu beef, and a sake tasting spot. It was great, and we loved our guide, but wished it had stopped at a few more spots to try more things.
9 PM: Walk around Shinjuku
We attempted to play pachinko, got very confused and lost $7. Tourism!

Friday: Hakone

7 AM: Set up luggage forwarding to Kyoto with hotel
Luggage forwarding is brilliant. We did it twice and it went so smoothly, for about $10 USD per bag. Highly recommend.
9 AM: Transit to Hakone
We got to experience Japanese transit at rush hour. I can’t believe I have to go back to the MTA after this. We took the subway to Tokyo station and then the Shinkansen to Odawara, then a train to Hakone-Yumoto. The hotel was only a 20-minute walk away, so we decided to take a more scenic route - which turned out to be a forest hike straight up switchbacks most of the way.
11 AM: Lunch in Hakone (Hatsuhana)
We stopped in a soba place called Hatsuhana with a system of writing your name down and waiting outside to be called in. They skipped our names because they weren’t in Japanese, but let us in when they realized their mistake. The soba was made and served by old aunties so of course it was insanely good and well worth it.
1 PM: Hakone Open Air Museum
We took the train down to the Hakone Open Air Museum, which lived up to the hype. I’m not normally into sculpture, but seeing it in nature, and the way the museum is laid out, made it incredible. And obviously the Picasso exhibit was amazing.
3 PM: Owakudani, Pirate Ship, Hakone Checkpoint
We took the train to the cable car to Owakudani, then the ropeway to Togendai, then the pirate ship ferry to Motohakone. We were running behind so unfortunately had to rush through the Hakone Checkpoint, which was empty but very cool.
6 PM: Dinner at hotel
Back to our hotel for our kaiseki meal. The staff spoke very little English and Google struggled with the menu, so we had no idea what we were eating half the time, but overall it was pretty good.
9 PM: Onsen time
Experienced my first public onsen, followed by the private onsen in our room. The tatami sleep did wonders for my back.

Saturday: Travel to Kyoto, Philosopher’s Path, Gion

8 AM: Breakfast, travel to Kyoto
Took the train to Odawara and then the Shinkansen to Kyoto station. We booked all of our Shinkansen seats about a week in advance but you can also book them on the day, I believe.
1 PM: Lunch in Gion
Our Kyoto hotel let us check in early, and then we went looking for lunch. Quickly learned that most every place in the Gion area has a line outside and closes at 2! We eventually found a tiny spot with insanely good ramen. It also had chicken sashimi on the menu but we weren’t brave enough.
2 PM: Philosopher’s Path, Ginkaku-ji
We took a bus over to the Philosopher’s Path, which was not busy at all because of the rain. It was pretty, and I could see how great it would look in cherry blossom season. We had to kind of rush to Ginkaku-ji, which was gorgeous nonetheless.
4 PM: Honen-in, Nanzen-ji
Stopped by Honen-in (which we had completely to ourselves, thanks rain!) and then Nanzen-ji. My bf is a big history guy and he went feral for the Hojo rock garden. It was very pretty and I’d love to see it in better weather.
6 PM: Food Tour of Gion & Pontocho
This food tour stopped at two places (an izakaya and a standing bar) with a walking tour of Gion and Pontocho in between. We also stopped at Yasaka shrine and caught a rehearsal of a traditional Japanese performance.
10 PM: Pain
My feet hurt so bad. Bring waterproof shoes, but make sure they don’t have 5 year old insoles. I tried some stick-on cooling acupuncture foot pads I picked up at Donki and they were bliss.

Sunday: Arashiyama, The Golden Pavilion and Tea Ceremony

8 AM: Arashiyama Bamboo Forest
The forecast was for heavy rain all day, but we lucked out and only got a few drizzles here and there. We headed to Arashiyama Bamboo Forest in the morning and it wasn’t too crowded. We did have an amazing bamboo dish at dinner last night so now bamboo makes me hungry.
10 AM: Tenryu-ji, Iwatayama Monkey Park
Headed over to Tenryu-ji, which was very nice but very crowded, and then to one of the things I looked forward to most on the trip, the Iwatayama Monkey Park. It’s a 20 minute hike up there but it is worth it. Oh my god. Getting to feed a baby monkey made my whole week.
12 PM: Lunch near Arashiyama (Udon Arashiyama-tei)
Headed back down to the main road and got duck udon at a little place called Udon Arashiyama-tei. I know I keep calling everything incredible but… yes.
1 PM: Ginkaku-ji
Ran into some bus issues (the first time we experienced anything public transit-wise not running as expected!) but eventually got over to Ginkaku-ji. It was also very crowded (seems like Japanese schools are big on field trips, which I’m jealous of) and not my favorite temple, but beautiful nonetheless.
3 PM: Daitoku-ji
We were ahead of schedule so we got to spend some time at our meeting place for the tea ceremony, Daitoku-ji. It ended up being our favorite temple, especially Daisen-in, a small and very quiet spot with a great self-guided tour. The monks showed us a section normally closed to non-Japanese tourists with beautiful calligraphy.
4 PM: Tea Ceremony (90 mins)
The tea ceremony we booked said it was in groups of up to ten, but it ended up being just us. It was very nice and relaxing, plus we got a little meal.
6 PM: Dinner (Gion Kappa), Pontocho Alley
We both nearly fell asleep on the bus back so we took it easy for the night. Went to an izakaya called Gion Kappa which had the best tuna belly we’d ever eaten, then did a quick walk around Pontocho Alley, got treats at 7-11 and went to bed early.

Monday: Fushimi Inari, Nishiki Market, Kyoto Imperial Palace (kinda)

9 AM: Fushimi Inari
Our plans to get up super early to beat the crowds to Fushimi Imari were hampered by the fact that we are no longer in our 20s. It was packed by the time we got there, and the amount of littering and defacing done by tourists was a bummer.
11 AM: Tofuku-ji
We had planned to go to the Imperial Palace at 10:30 for the Aoi Parade, but decided instead to get away from crowds by hiking from Fushimi Inari to Tofuku-ji, which was beautiful (I’d love to see it in the fall).
12 PM: Nishiki Market, lunch (Gyukatsu)
Grabbed lunch first at Gyukatsu (wagyu katsu - delicious) then wandered Nishiki a bit. It’s touristy, but fun.
2 PM: Kyoto Gyoen, Kyoto Handicraft Center
It was supposed to rain all day but ended up sunny, so we went back to the hotel to drop off our rain jackets and umbrellas. Stepped back outside and within ten minutes it was raining. We went to Kyoto Gyoen and saw the outside of the imperial palace; it was closed because of the parade earlier and half the garden was blocked off because the former emperor was visiting. Without the palace, Kyoto Gyoen is kind of meh. We walked over to Kyoto Handicraft Center which was also meh, but we picked up some nice lacquerware.
7:30 PM: Dinner at Roan Kiku Noi
We had a reservation at Roan Kiku Noi where we had maybe the best meal of our lives. Amazing that it only has two Michelin stars, honestly. Had fun trying to decipher the pain meds aisle at a Japanese pharmacy afterwards and then called it a night.

Tuesday: Day Trip to Nara

8 AM: Travel to Nara
We took the subway to the JR and were there in about an hour.
9 AM: Nara Deer Park
Two things about the Nara deer. One: if you bow to them, they bow back, and it’s very cute. And two, if you buy the 200y rice crackers to feed to them, do it somewhere where there aren’t very many of them. I got mobbed by like 15 deer and bitten 3 times. My fault for having skin approximately the shade of a rice cracker.
10 AM: Kofuku-ji, Nara National Museum
We saw Kofuku-ji and then the Nara National Museum, then stopped at a random little cafe for rice bowls with some kind of regional sauce (I can’t find it now!).
12 PM: Isetan Garden
We spent a long time finding the entrance to the Isetan garden only for it to be closed on Tuesdays.
2 PM: Giant Buddha
Saw Nandaimon Gate and the Daibutsu (giant Buddha), which are both every bit as enormous and glorious as advertised, as well as very crowded.
3 PM: Kasuga-taisha Shrine
Wandered over to Kasuga-taisha shrine, which is famous for its hundreds of lanterns and thousand-year-old trees. There’s a special inner area (paid) where you can see the lanterns lit up in the dark.
4 PM: Wait for the emperor
We got held up by a procession for, guess who, the former emperor again. Stalker.
5 PM: Nara shopping and snacks
Walked around Higashimuki Shopping Street and Mochiidono Shopping Arcade, bought a nice sake set and an amazing little hand-painted cat, ate some red bean paste pancakes and headed back to Kyoto.
7 PM: Dinner in Kyoto
Walked around Pontocho searching for dinner and landed on Yoshina, where we got even more kaiseki. Finished the night at Hello Dolly, a gorgeous jazz bar overlooking the river.

Wednesday: Day Trip to Osaka

7 AM: Depart hotel
Started by taking the subway to the JR. Took us about an hour altogether, though it would have been faster if we’d caught the express.
9 AM: Osaka Castle
We got to Osaka Castle in time for it to hit 85 degrees out. The outside of the castle is gorgeous, but the line to get in was long and I don’t know if the museum parts were worth the wait, especially with the crowds. The view from the top is nice, though.
12 PM: Okonomiyaki lunch (Abeton)
We went to an okonomiyaki spot in Avetica station called Abeton that was full of locals and absolutely bomb as hell.
1 PM: Shitteno-ji, Keitakuen Gardens
We headed to Shitteno-ji (our oldest temple yet) which was nice, though the climb to the top of then 5 story pagoda wasn’t worth the sweat. Then we walked over to Keitakuen Gardens, a small but gorgeous garden in Tennoji Park. Had a nice sit in the shade to digest and plan our next moves.
3 PM: Ebisuhigasbi, Mega Don Quijote
I am a crazy person, so I had to go to the Mega Don Quijote. We walked around Ebisuhigasbi for a while first, and while I was buying gifts in Donki, my boyfriend entered a sushi challenge for westerners (which turned out to just be “can a white boy handle wasabi”) and won a bunch of random crap! Now we own Japanese furniture wipes.
5 PM: Dotonbori & America-mura
We took the Osaka Loop to the Dotonbori area, which was super crowded as expected. We walked around America-mura and enjoyed seeing what they think of us. There are great designer vintage clothing shops here if that’s your thing.
6 PM: Dinner (Jiyuken)
We tried to get into Koni Doraku, a crab restaurant, but they were booked up, so we went to a tiny spot called Jiyuken for curry instead. I would do things for this curry. It was the platonic ideal of curry. It was served by old Japanese aunties from a very old recipe, so we knew it was going to be good, but it exceeded our wildest expectations… for <1000y each.
7 PM: Return to Kyoto
My feet were feeling real bad (the Nikes may look cool but they cannot support 25k steps a day) so we headed back to Kyoto and packed for our early morning tomorrow.

Thursday: Travel to Koyasan, Temple Stay

8 AM: Bus from Kyoto to Koyasan
The transit from Kyoto to Mt Koya is complicated, so we ended up just booking a bus directly from Kyoto Station to Koyasan (which barely cost more than public transit!). We got there bright and early for the 3 hour trip - if you take a bus out of Kyoto Station I definitely recommend giving yourself extra time to navigate to the right bus.
11 AM: Arrive at Eko-in, lunch
We arrived in Mt Koya and checked in to our temple, Eko-in. The quiet and the beauty hit me hard and I fell asleep for a few hours. We got a nice lunch at Hanabishi in town.
4 PM: Meditation class, dinner
The temple offered a meditation class, which was lovely, followed by a vegan dinner in our rooms. I can’t explain how peaceful this place was.
7 PM: Okuno-in Cemetery
We signed up for a monk-led tour of Okuno-in, which was definitely worth it. Came back for some public baths and fell asleep to the sound of rainfall.

Friday: Travel to Kanazawa, Higashi Chaya District

7 AM: Service & ritual at Eko-in
The day started with a religious service and a fire ritual at the temple. Both were stunning. I did wish that my fellow tourists had been a bit more respectful by showing up on time and following directions, but luckily, no one has more patience than a Buddhist monk.
9 AM: Travel to Kanazawa
We took a taxi through some sketchy mountain roads to Gokurakubashi Station, took two trains to Osaka Station, and then the JR Thunderbird to Kanazawa.
1 PM: Arrive at Kanazawa, Lunch (Maimon)
We got into Kanazawa station and went straight for a sushi spot called Maimon, which was delicious. Struggled a bit with the bus system and eventually got to our hotel, Utaimachi.
4 PM: Higashi Chaya District
Wandered the Higashi Chaya district a bit. It seemed kind of dead, but maybe we are just used to the hustle and bustle of Tokyo/Kyoto.
7 PM: Korinbo, dinner (Uguisu)
Walked down to the Korinbo area southwest of the park and found a tiny ramen spot called Uguisu. Incredible. Some of the best broth I’ve ever tasted plus amazing sous vide meats.
9 PM: Bar in Korinbo (Kohaku)
Went to a little upstairs whiskey bar called Kohaku. Boyfriend got Japanese whiskey and they made me a custom cocktail with sake, pineapple and passion fruit that was just insane. They were very nice and talked baseball with us for a while.

Saturday: Omicho Market, Kanazawa Castle, 21st Century Museum

9 AM: Kenroku-en Garden
We walked over to Kenroku-en Gardens, which were as beautiful as advertised. I was hurting pretty bad (crampy ladies, just know Japanese OTC painkillers are much weaker than ours, BYO Advil) so we’re moving slowly today.
12 PM: Omicho Market, lunch (Iki-Iki Sushi)
Walked to Omicho Market and ate little bits from different stalls, then waited about an hour to get into Iki-Iki Sushi. It was worth it. Some of the best, freshest sushi of my life.
2 PM: Kanazawa Castle, 21st Century Museum of Contemporary Art
We walked around Kanazawa Castle a bit, then walked over to the 21st Century Museum of Contemporary Art. It was packed and the line to get tickets to the special exhibits was crazy, so we looked at the free ones and then headed back. Along the way we stopped in a few little stores and bought some handcrafted lacquerware from a local artist.
6 PM: Onnagawa Festival, dinner (Huni)
As we walked towards the restaurant, we came upon the Onnagawa Festival on the Plum Bridge, which included a beautiful dancing ceremony and lantern lighting. We went to Huni for dinner, our first “westernized Japanese” restaurant, and it was fantastic. 9 dishes served slowly over 3 hours at a table overlooking the river. Highly recommend if you’re in Kanazawa.
10 PM: Why does the bathtub have a phone
We went back to our hotel, struggled with the automated bathtub, and enjoyed our last night on tatami floors.

Sunday: Travel to Tokyo, Tokyo Giants Game, Ueno Park

7 AM: Travel to Tokyo
Grabbed a taxi we arranged the night before to Kanazawa Station - it would have been an easy bus journey but our number of bags has increased - and boarded the Shinkansen for Tokyo.
12 PM: Travel to Tokyo Dome and Tokyo Dome Park
Dropped our bags at our hotel in Asakusa, then headed for Tokyo Dome. We got there a little early to look around - there’s basically a full mall and food court and amusement park there. We grabbed some beers and some chicken katsu curry that was delicious.
2 PM: Tokyo Giants vs Chunichi Dragons
Japanese baseball games are so. much. fun. This was a random mid season game, and the stadium was full and people were amped. I’ve been to many American baseball games and never seen fans this excited. We also scored some fried cheese-wrapped hot dogs on a stick and a few more beers and had the time of our lives cheering for the Giants.
5 PM: Ueno Park
After trying and failing to find the jersey we were looking for, we walked to Ueno Park and looked around a bit. It was lovely, but we were exhausted and full of too many beers, so we headed back to Asakusa.
7 PM: Dinner in Asakusa
There was a festival all day around Shinso-ji and there were a ton of street vendors and day-drunk people when we arrived in the afternoon (as a native Louisianan, I approve) and it seemed like the partiers were going on into the night. We ducked into a restaurant for some buckwheat soba (never got the name, but it was only okay) and tucked in early.

Monday: Tsukiji Food Tour, Kapabashi Dougu, Akihabara

8 AM: 3-hour Tsukiji Food Tour + lunch
We started the day with a Tsukiji food tour, which ended up being my favorite food tour of the 3 by far. The guide was great, and we stopped by a dozen food stalls and sampled everything from mochi to fresh tuna to octopus cakes. We finished with lunch at Sushi Katsura, where our chef prepared everything in front of us.
12 PM: Imperial Palace, Don Quijote
We were planning to spend the afternoon exploring the Imperial Palace and Edo Castle Ruins, but it was hot and the palace was closed, so we walked to Taira no Masakado's Grave, then headed back to Asakusa for, you guessed it, Don Quijote. I did not intend for this trip to be “guess how many Don Quijotes I can visit” but here we are. We bought another suitcase and I filled it with food and gifts to bring home.
3 PM: Kappabashi Dougu
We walked Kappabashi Dougu and browsed kitchenwares while wishing we had a bigger kitchen, an unlimited budget and a way to get a hundred pounds of porcelain home in one piece.
6 PM: Akihabara dinner + games + drinks
We took the train to Akihabara, got dinner at Tsukada Nojo, then played games in a few arcades and ended the night at Game Bar A-button, which lets you play vintage handheld games while you drink.

Tuesday: Senso-ji, Flight

9 AM: Breakfast, Senso-ji
We got breakfast pancakes at Kohikan, then walked around Senso-ji and the surrounding shopping streets for a while.
12 PM: McDonald’s
Look, I couldn’t leave Japan without doing it, okay? I got the Teriyaki Chicken Burger (too sloppy and sweet) and bf got the Ebi Filet-O (he said it tasted exactly like a Filet-O-Fish). It was not great but I deserve that!
3 PM: Cab to the airport
I caught the flu on the flight home and have now been in bed for a week! Welcome back to America, baby.

The alcoholic drinks are done, now we are wondering about soft options.
And since, let's be honest, no adult wants to spend their evening drinking coke and ice tea, so we were thinking of a DIY-mocktail station. This would be also way less hassle to set up, reduce plastic and be much cheaper. So far, my list includes:
Still and sparkling water, as well as ice
Some veggies/fruits to add (cucumber, lemon, berries, oranges)
Herbs linke mint and thyme
Lemon and lime juice
Different syrups (Elderberryflower and ginger so far, still looking for other fancy ones)
​
Am I missing something? Does this sound like a good idea to you?
​
Edit: Thanks for all the great feedback! Recipe signs are on my list now, as well as providing some cocktail equipment to get the best drinking experience

Good Afternoon,
I am new to reddit and also new to writing with intention of other people reading it. I would like to share some of my short stories and am open to constructive input. I write because I enjoy it and I interested if anyone else does. The intention of these stories is to be include in a sort of memoi cookbook.
thank you.
Sugar High
They say that once you quit drinking your body craves sugar, I know this is very true. Before I went to rehab I really did not like sweets very much, except ice cream I always loved ice cream. Recovering addicts rely on sugar like Milli Vanilli relies on vocal tracks. Every “meal” provided the minimal amount of nutrients a person needs to stay alive. Up to this point in my life I was naively unaware of the many food types that come in powder form. There was a week that we had salt, it was amazing! For every meal there was a buffet of day old pastries laid out on each table. If you saw something you liked while waiting in line you had better grab it. Rehab cafeterias have some of the same rules as high school- it definitely matters where you sit, and a fight erupting over a cupcake was not unheard of. These self anointed kings of the streets, tough guys turn into little bitches, over the last Unicorn sprinkle cupcake at snack time. The only thing different between a group of 70 grown men and a group of 70 teenage girls, is the amount of body hair, and the maturity levels are identical.
For the better part of a year and half just being awake was enough of a reason to be drinking. There was always a nagging feeling in the back of my mind that I wouldn't have enough booze, so I carried my own everywhere I went. The thought process that decided the size of bottle I would bring depended on whether this would be my only source of booze or it was a companion bottle to accompany the cocktails I was having publicly. I would hate for people to think I was drunk and order a Vodka martini with a Jack Daniel’s chaser, I am a lady so I did my shot in the powder room. Grocery shopping was a half Pint, even though I was also buying two 1.75mL bottles for the next couple days but I couldn't wait till I got home. Work was usually a pint and half, a pint from the strip club liquor store and a couple of shots at the bar across the street when that was gone. The word addiction never crossed my mind; I was a fabulously highly functional alcoholic.
When I admitted to myself and a room full of strangers the extent and severity of my addiction, I could finally see myself, in the faces of my peers in that room and what I saw was terrifying. For the first time in my life I did not like myself, definitely did not love myself. Up to this point in my life I had an unwavering belief that I was amazing at everything I did. I knew that I succeeded because I was so confident and I was so confident because I succeeded. I felt like I had just been punched in the gut, and I lost my entire self worth in that one minute. Alcohol had taken away from me the very essence of who I am. Those early days were hard. I had to rediscover myself, I am still discovering myself. I did find my confidence again.
Geno I got sober together and it has been so great, there was a part of both of us that had been lying dormant for a little while and when it came out it came out in force. In the first month of sobriety we got to see our new niece Raelynn for the first time, around four months we had started a cookie business, restructured our lives, and by month six we had started making our 2 year plan to grow our cookie business into a national brand, and I started writing a book, yes this one.
Geno has always been the baker in the family. I started dabbling in baking right after I got out of rehab, I could not believe how much extra time I had now that I was not drinking. Geno had made an Oreo Cheesecake and it looked like so much fun. A few days passed and I wanted to make a cheesecake, so I started with a simple cheesecake, a few days later there was an apple crisp, then a couple dozen mini cheesecakes, 1-2-3-4 cake with buttercream frosting, not as easy as the name may suggest, then a couple dozen chocolate chip cookies, most of these recipes were straight forward and required no creativity and I was starting to get bored… Ooh something shiny… then Mini Lava Brownies with Chocolate Ganache Drizzle happened. *mic drop* You are welcome!
(LAVA BROWNIES WITH GANACHE DRIZZLE)
Sunset Sandwiches:
The year prior to checking myself into rehab was one self- created dumpster fire after another. One does not usually end up in rehab after a wonderfully stable year. I spent most the year running away from the people who loved me most, especially my husband, Geno. Geno and I have been through some tough times in our relationship but this year was especially awful. I believe Queen Elizebeth II called it an “Annus Horribilis”, very fitting since this was the year Windsor caught fire and I spent the entire year trying to burn my life to the ground. I was in such a dark place and didn't even realize it, it was very scary and lonely inside myself and my outward side was the complete opposite. This duality in my life caused me to create a villain and sadly that villain was Geno. At one point in May I attempted suicide and almost succeded, Geno found me on the couch and called an ambulance, I woke up 2 day later in a mental hospital on suicide watch. The scariest part about that was I had no recollection of wanting to hurt myself or even thinking it through, all I remember is seeing darkness. I came home after seven days and I really thought I would slow down on the drinking and maybe I did for a little while but not long enough to remember. I remember thinking that I was loved becaused all my friends and family were so devastated at the thought of losing me, that feeling was lost again to the booze soon after.
That summer was a rollercoaster of huge fights, extended time away from each other, terrible things were said, and in October it all reached a climax and I threatened to leave Geno and went to stay with my cousin Mandi in Wisconsin with the rest of my family. My aunt Kristy and Grandma were exactly what I knew deep down they would be, honest as fuck! My grandma told me that I was “difficult, had lived a very charmed life and I should suck it up, go home and be happy with my husband”. My Aunt Kristy was brutally honest. She sat me down and asked me “What was going on?” when I started to tell her in my sugar coated everything will be fine, she called bullshit on me. She called out my drinking and told me I didnt even “resemble her nephew.” She also told me it was time to get my shit together. Kristy fought a long hard battle with addiction and has been happily sober for many years now. She said “Honey, I missed a lot of years of my life due to addiction.” She has now forced me to feel real emotions and I am open-mouth sobbing, she goes on, “You are going to lose them too or worse you will lose everything.”
It was the first time I was forced to see myself and the disaster I had become. A week later I flew home and checked myself into rehab. It was difficult to remember how to be happy with Geno, I had to retrain myself to love him the way he deserved to be loved and to see how much he loves me. In those first weeks we spent all day everyday together, it was amazing, for the first time in a long time we were not yelling and screaming at each other. One beautiful day we decided to go to the beach for a sunset picnic, it was the first time we had gone to see the sunset since we had quit drinking. The sunset was the most beautiful orange and glorious sunset, I was finally seeing my Geno, and he was all the light I needed. That sunset I fell madly in love with my husband again, oh and we had some sandwiches!

Good Afternoon,
I am new to reddit and also a new to writing with intention of other people reading it. I would like to share some of my short stories and am open to constructive input. Please do not be negative or judgemental. I write because I enjoy it and I interested if anyone else does. The intention of these stories is to be include in a sort of memoi cookbook
thank you
Sugar High
They say that once you quit drinking your body craves sugar, I know this is very true. Before I went to rehab I really did not like sweets very much, except ice cream I always loved ice cream. Recovering addicts rely on sugar like Milli Vanilli relies on vocal tracks. Every “meal” provided the minimal amount of nutrients a person needs to stay alive. Up to this point in my life I was naively unaware of the many food types that come in powder form. There was a week that we had salt, it was amazing! For every meal there was a buffet of day old pastries laid out on each table. If you saw something you liked while waiting in line you had better grab it. Rehab cafeterias have some of the same rules as high school- it definitely matters where you sit, and a fight erupting over a cupcake was not unheard of. These self anointed kings of the streets, tough guys turn into little bitches, over the last Unicorn sprinkle cupcake at snack time. The only thing different between a group of 70 grown men and a group of 70 teenage girls, is the amount of body hair, and the maturity levels are identical.
For the better part of a year and half just being awake was enough of a reason to be drinking. There was always a nagging feeling in the back of my mind that I wouldn't have enough booze, so I carried my own everywhere I went. The thought process that decided the size of bottle I would bring depended on whether this would be my only source of booze or it was a companion bottle to accompany the cocktails I was having publicly. I would hate for people to think I was drunk and order a Vodka martini with a Jack Daniel’s chaser, I am a lady so I did my shot in the powder room. Grocery shopping was a half Pint, even though I was also buying two 1.75mL bottles for the next couple days but I couldn't wait till I got home. Work was usually a pint and half, a pint from the strip club liquor store and a couple of shots at the bar across the street when that was gone. The word addiction never crossed my mind; I was a fabulously highly functional alcoholic.
When I admitted to myself and a room full of strangers the extent and severity of my addiction, I could finally see myself, in the faces of my peers in that room and what I saw was terrifying. For the first time in my life I did not like myself, definitely did not love myself. Up to this point in my life I had an unwavering belief that I was amazing at everything I did. I knew that I succeeded because I was so confident and I was so confident because I succeeded. I felt like I had just been punched in the gut, and I lost my entire self worth in that one minute. Alcohol had taken away from me the very essence of who I am. Those early days were hard. I had to rediscover myself, I am still discovering myself. I did find my confidence again.
Geno I got sober together and it has been so great, there was a part of both of us that had been lying dormant for a little while and when it came out it came out in force. In the first month of sobriety we got to see our new niece Raelynn for the first time, around four months we had started a cookie business, restructured our lives, and by month six we had started making our 2 year plan to grow our cookie business into a national brand, and I started writing a book, yes this one.
Geno has always been the baker in the family. I started dabbling in baking right after I got out of rehab, I could not believe how much extra time I had now that I was not drinking. Geno had made an Oreo Cheesecake and it looked like so much fun. A few days passed and I wanted to make a cheesecake, so I started with a simple cheesecake, a few days later there was an apple crisp, then a couple dozen mini cheesecakes, 1-2-3-4 cake with buttercream frosting, not as easy as the name may suggest, then a couple dozen chocolate chip cookies, most of these recipes were straight forward and required no creativity and I was starting to get bored… Ooh something shiny… then Mini Lava Brownies with Chocolate Ganache Drizzle happened. *mic drop* You are welcome!
(LAVA BROWNIES WITH GANACHE DRIZZLE)

Sunset Sandwiches:

The year prior to checking myself into rehab was one self- created dumpster fire after another. One does not usually end up in rehab after a wonderfully stable year. I spent most the year running away from the people who loved me most, especially my husband, Geno. Geno and I have been through some tough times in our relationship but this year was especially awful. I believe Queen Elizebeth II called it an “Annus Horribilis”, very fitting since this was the year Windsor caught fire and I spent the entire year trying to burn my life to the ground. I was in such a dark place and didn't even realize it, it was very scary and lonely inside myself and my outward side was the complete opposite. This duality in my life caused me to create a villain and sadly that villain was Geno. At one point in May I attempted suicide and almost succeded, Geno found me on the couch and called an ambulance, I woke up 2 day later in a mental hospital on suicide watch. The scariest part about that was I had no recollection of wanting to hurt myself or even thinking it through, all I remember is seeing darkness. I came home after seven days and I really thought I would slow down on the drinking and maybe I did for a little while but not long enough to remember. I remember thinking that I was loved becaused all my friends and family were so devastated at the thought of losing me, that feeling was lost again to the booze soon after.
That summer was a rollercoaster of huge fights, extended time away from each other, terrible things were said, and in October it all reached a climax and I threatened to leave Geno and went to stay with my cousin Mandi in Wisconsin with the rest of my family. My aunt Kristy and Grandma were exactly what I knew deep down they would be, honest as fuck! My grandma told me that I was “difficult, had lived a very charmed life and I should suck it up, go home and be happy with my husband”. My Aunt Kristy was brutally honest. She sat me down and asked me “What was going on?” when I started to tell her in my sugar coated everything will be fine, she called bullshit on me. She called out my drinking and told me I didnt even “resemble her nephew.” She also told me it was time to get my shit together. Kristy fought a long hard battle with addiction and has been happily sober for many years now. She said “Honey, I missed a lot of years of my life due to addiction.” She has now forced me to feel real emotions and I am open-mouth sobbing, she goes on, “You are going to lose them too or worse you will lose everything.”
It was the first time I was forced to see myself and the disaster I had become. A week later I flew home and checked myself into rehab. It was difficult to remember how to be happy with Geno, I had to retrain myself to love him the way he deserved to be loved and to see how much he loves me. In those first weeks we spent all day everyday together, it was amazing, for the first time in a long time we were not yelling and screaming at each other. One beautiful day we decided to go to the beach for a sunset picnic, it was the first time we had gone to see the sunset since we had quit drinking. The sunset was the most beautiful orange and glorious sunset, I was finally seeing my Geno, and he was all the light I needed. That sunset I fell madly in love with my husband again, oh and we had some sandwiches!

I made a marble cake. Unfortunately, I accidentally over baked it and it’s already too sweet due to a recipe error so I can’t add a sugawater syrup cake soak
My options so far: 1. Soy milk soak (just what I have on hand, I don’t have any other milks) 2. Espresso soak (hoping the bitterness of espresso will cut the sweetness, but I don’t want it to taste too much like coffee. Do you think I can add an espresso soak without it tasting too coffee-y?) 3. Can I add…. oil? Is an oil soak a thing? Edit: I meant brush on a bit of butteoil! Not a soak, that sounds gross lol. Just a light brush like you might brush butter on top of rolls or a pizza crust 4. Can I soak it with just a bit of water? 5. I’ve also thought of a mix of these, like maybe soy milk with espresso powder, or those two plus a bit of oil?
What would you do?
Other things I’ve considered: Some fruit filling (cake recipient is not a fan), alcohol (cake recipient doesn’t drink)

Hi everybody! Hope your wedding planning is going well! I’m just here to let you know that if you’re stressing about the planning and budget of your wedding, it’s going to be fine! I was so stressed in the run up, and on my wedding day my M.O.H pulled my aside on multiple occasions to calm down, but as soon as I was ready and the day started rolling out, it was pure magic! Here are a list of tips and tricks we used to keep our costs down:

• We have skilled friends, we asked them to use their skills at our wedding instead of giving us a present. The photos, videos and celebrant were all close friends of ours and they were phenomenal. (They aren’t professional, just have experience with cameras and speaking). We got married a week before with simpleceremonies.com
• I ordered my wedding dress off etsy, it was amazing!!!
• The bridesmaids dresses were off Silkfred, pretty little thing and JJs house. The Paige boy outfit was on sale!
• My husband didnt want suits so instead they went to Zara, got lovely trousers and shirts and then we ordered bow ties and suspenders/braces off Asussieties.com
• Instead of getting married in an expensive area, we went to a rural beach “town” where the costs of all the services were super cheap, catering was $50pp, hair stylist was $50pp, everyone was super chill and amazing!
• Instead of hiring a tent or gazebo, we bought our own off Harvey Norman and saved almost $2000!
• One of my best friends made us a wedding brownie tower instead of buying a wedding cake.
• Instead of going to a florist I went to Aldi 2 days before the wedding, bought all the roses I could get my hands on, used tiktok to help me open them up and care for them and made my own bouquet, bridesmaids bouquets and boutonnières for the guys. It was actually super easy, fun to do with my mum and sister and friends and they looked stunning. Came to $140! I had a quote from a florist and my bouquet alone would have been $150.
• For decor, I raided the Bunnings sales after Christmas and bought 6km of fairy lights, outdoor “chandeliers”, floral wreaths and other bits and bobs.
• I’m a seamstress so saved all long white fabric lengths to drape everywhere.
• My husband is a carpenter so he made out altearch.
• I saved clear jars and wine bottles for months and months to use on the tables. I put colourful ribbon around the jars then a battery tea light in them, then put single or double roses in the wine bottles.
• I made the table cloths myself out of white calico.
• I didnt bother with invitations, just used withjoy.com - its an amazing free resource!
• Bought my bright pink wedding shoes on sale, and my husband hates new shoes because they always rub so he just wore his favourite shoes.
• We didnt have a band or DJ, I spent weeks creating the perfect wedding playlist and everyone danced all night - we plugged it into one of those big JBL party speakers, it was awesome!
• Kept the guest list to 50 ppl, we got to spend time with every single person, it was amazing!
• I borrowed my mums wedding veil and tiara rather than buying my own.
• Kept my eyes on facebook market place all the time in the run up for things to use and decorate.
• Took advantage of anything friends had and borrowed for the wedding (we borrowed 4 glass decanters for cocktails and a canoe we filled with ice for beer and bubbles, and rugs for the alter and reception)

The list is long so if you read this far, thank you and well done! Have a drink! Ha! Most importantly, our friends and family were amazing and while I was the one with the vision of what i wanted and how i wanted it to go, They helped to put everything together! It was magic!
Another (and important) note, we were super lucky as well, 2 main budgeting points that we got given to us as wedding gifts were the venue, (our friend has stunning acreage where we set everything up and stayed while we booked a huge air bnb near by for our guests.) and the alcohol, my husbands boss loves to party and get people drunk so bought the alcohol for the day. There was so much left over… they were both incredibly generous and I don’t believe we would have been able to have all the little extras I wanted without those costs taken care of. Having said that, I planned on getting the booze from Aldi which would have been really reasonable (and I like Aldi booze) where as we were gifted lovely fancy booze which was awesome!
So, if you can think outside the box with venue/location, or cut costs elsewhere like not hiring/buying a tent or selling a lot of your stuff afterwards, or don’t hire a massive house for your bridal party and guests, I know having a wedding under 10K is completely doable!
ETA: our budget was $10k so when we were offered our friends property and the alcohol as gifts, we were able to spend $2000 on the huge house for the wedding party. Our alternative venue would have been a rented field for a couple of hundred dollars with a couple of portaloos for another couple of hundred, the booze would have come to around $1000. If anyone is interested to see the exact breakdown of the budget, let me know.
Edit 2: the photos were taken by a friend who has a good camera and is a hobby surf/nature photographer and the videos were taken on an iPhone then edited using InShot. The brownies were made using an Aldi cake brownie mix (we taste tested about 15 different mixes and recipes and Aldi triple choc was by far the best!) which cost $3.50 a box and we had 6 boxes + 3 blocks of butter, 1 litre of milk and 12 eggs. So all up, I think the ingredients came to around $45.
Someone mentioned that the comparison between AUD and USD is interesting, so our exact spend was $9650.00 AUD which works out to $6287.94 USD at the current exchange. Had we spent the extra $2000 AUD on booze and field and portaloo hire ($1303.20 USD) the totals would have been $11650.00 AUD or $7591.14 USD.

hopefully this is the correct flair!! just sharing my current samples i'm rotating, if anyone has tried these lmk what you think!
Ex Idolo - Love & Crime
Indult - Tihota
Lamar - Kajal
Fragrance du Bois - Santal Complet, Oud Jaune Intense
Mancera - Melody of the Sun
Thameen - Peregrina
DS&Durga - Debaser
Tiziana Terenzi - Kirke, Cassiopeia
Sospiro - Bel Canto, Vibrato, Contralto
BORNTOSTANDOUT - Drunk Saffron, Fig Porn
Xerjoff - Torino21, Cruz del Sur II, Apollonia, Accento Overdose, Nio
M. Micallef - Ylang in Gold
Memo - Inlé, Sherwood, Sintra, Lalibela
Initio - Atomic Rose
Van Cleef & Arpels - Santal Blanc
Alghabra - Sweet Reflection
Maison Crivelli - Hibiscus Mahajad
Akro - Bake
Giardini di Toscana - Bianco Latte
Comme des Garcons - Odeur Du Theatre Du Chatelet Acte 1
Liquide Imaginaires - Blanche Bête
Nishane - Ani
Matiere Premiere - Parisian Musc
Marissa Zappas - Annabel's Birthday Cake
Penhaligons - Changing Constance
Perris Monte Carlo - Ylang Ylang Nosy Be

I have a 7 month old baby boy, I'm breastfeeding but baby is currently weaning.
I'm convinced that my FIL is being weird about my breastfeeding and not in a "that makes me uncomfortable" way.
I made the baby popsicles from my boob milk a few months ago and FIL put in the group chat that "I'd love to try one of those" with a hearts as eyes emoji. I said "WTF they're made from breast milk" and he said he didn't notice that caption.
Today I baked the baby some muffins. It's a recipe that called for a half cup of breast milk so I made them per recipe. FIL came over unannounced and said "oh yum, someone's been baking" so I told him "those muffins are for the baby, they're just fruit, flour and breast milk. I have a normal cake we can have".
I then left the room to wash my hands, came back and one of the muffins was missing. I asked husband and he had no idea so I asked FIL and he said that he ate it. I said that's disgusting, I told him they were the babies and contained breast milk. He doubled down and said it's ok because "breast milk is vegan" (note, no one in this story is vegan). I told him he's a creepy pervert and to get the fuck out my house.
Husband is baffled by the whole thing and was convinced it was a misunderstanding even though I explicitly said they're made with breast milk.
FIL said I'm a dick because I'd made loads and the baby wouldn't miss out.
MIL was blowing up my phone until I asked her if she was really ok with FIL drinking milk that came direct from my breast, I think she didn't get the whole story.
My sisters say it's fucking gross and FIL is a weirdo.
UPDATE
I asked my husband what he thought I was mad about (he was in the room but on the other side and occupied with the baby) and he said he didn't realise that his dad actually ate the muffin, he thought I was pissed because he was messing with them. He also didn't remember the group chat incident but agreed that both incidents together is creepy.
I called MIL to "clear the air" and she revealed that FIL has always been "very interested" in lactation and she actually only fed husband for 4 months and always behind a locked door! Apparently he moved jobs after a woman complained that he kept intruding on her pumping in a designated space in the office.
I've told them FIL is not welcome around me and have asked for the key to our house back.
I shared the concerns about him tampering with my milk (and contaminating it) and also that if his own wife wanted him locked out then I'm entitled to that too.
The comment that hit my husband was the one about FIL getting off for years on the memory of eating the gross AF baby muffin. Husband said he won't be able to look FIL in the eye again.

Judges: Aarón Sánchez, Alex Guarnaschelli, Chris Santos
Chefs: Chris Coleman, Cindi Avila, Lucas Manteca, Robert Burmeister
Appetizer Ingredients: Asparagus, Chorizo, Button Mushrooms, Canned Peaches
Entrée Ingredients: Rice Cakes, Chicken Thighs, Yellow Plantains, Fruit Punch, Cocktail Onions
Dessert Ingredients: Beets, Goat Cheese, Oatmeal, Crystalized Ginger

Has anyone heard of a dessert called sunshine, I remember having it as a child in a restaurant in Iran, I think it had jelly, fruits, cream, ice cream and maybe cake in it, I tried finding a recipe online but there wasn't anything about it.

I run social groups for my work, for a specific group of people. The two ladies in question are both able minded and able bodied. They're both nightmares, constant complainers and have caused 3 staff to quit because they can't put up with their stuff anymore.
Last week, I organised a high tea party. I spent the entire day before baking stuff for it. Different flavours of cupcakes, scones, little pastries, sandwiches etc. One of the ladies has some allergies, so I found a recipe for a gluten free, nut free and dairy free cake and was so proud to make it for her.
I go into work an hour early, setting everything up and it looks beautiful. They arrive and Karen 1 says "well this looks like crap" upon entering into the room. My jaw dropped. Then she says "it's a lot of sugar here, I won't eat this shit". I pretend to not hear these comments and go into my office. Then I hear Karen 2 say that she can't eat anything here due to her allergies. So I come in and I show her the cake I made for her. That's when she tells me she can't eat it because she's allergic to icing. The icing being sugar and water I know this isn't true, I watch her put very normal average sugar in her cups of tea every day she's in. I explain this to her but she's insistent that all of a sudden she's allergic to icing. So I give up and leave.
When some of the other members come in I go in to greet them as I normally do. Karen 1 then questions why there are teacups on the table (you know, for the high tea party which has been planned for months now) then asks me if I'm going to control what she drinks out of and how dare I take away the mugs she usually uses. I point out that the mugs are still in the regular position, she can use whatever, it was just for the theme of the party. Karen 2 then states very angrily that she's annoyed she can't have a dessert due to me not caring about her icing allergy. She says all this while she has a half eaten cupcake on her plate. Both Karen 1 and 2 then complain that every single thing on the table to eat was "crap". From the sandwiches, desserts, iced tea and fresh fruit. They also complained about the movie I put on in the background which was Alice in Wonderland, asking me if I thought they were kids.
When I went back into my office Karen 1 stated to one of the workers that I should have personally consulted with her on the menu. Something I did 2 weeks before. Also consulted Karen 2 on what her allergies was and icing never came up.
On a normal day, they get a few cheap biscuits and coffee/tea for their morning tea because they don't pay for it and it's complimentary. But this big event was so thought out and they still didn't pay a cent and yet I have never heard someone complain about a free event or the food that comes with it. I love my job but holy fuck days like this make me not want to put in any effort. I continue to do so for the other members but it gets me really down.

I made a text transcription of this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TS3hEEoD2vc youtube video for the recipes to upgrade your horse at malanya. It has all of the recipes for each upgrade (under stars), followed by the list of ingredients to make each recipe (under recipes). I find it much easier to read recipes from a list rather than replay 3 second long segments of a video so thought this might be useful for others too.
To upgrade your horse you need to go to Malanya who now lives just southwest of the Akkala tech lab. Give them an Endura carrot and they will let you upgrade horses if you bring him specific food. The food needed varies depending on what level you're upgrading from and what stat.
The star rating below is to 'get' that stat. So if you have a horse with 2 star strength you want the '3 star - strength' recipe. You have to do each numbered stat upgrade in order. You can't instantly make a 2 strength horse a 5 strength horse, you need to upgrade to 3 then 4 then 5 stars.
3 star

strength - 1 copious fried wild greens speed - 1 salt-grilled greens stamina - 1 herb saute pull - 1 veggie rice balls 

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4 star

strength - 3 veggie rice balls, 3 copious fried wild greens speed - 3 glazed veggies, 3 steamed tomatoes stamina - 3 honeyed apple, 3 veggie porridge pull - 3 copious fried wild greens, 3 veggie porridge 

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5 star

strength - 3 vegetable curry, 3 hot buttered apple, 3 carrot cake speed - 3 vegetable omelet, 3 veggie cream soup, 3 apple pie stamina - 3 vegetable risotto, 3 carrot stew, 3 cream of vegetable soup pull - 3 hot buttered apple, 3 carrot stew, 3 veggie cream soup 

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recipes
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(3 star)
copius fried wild greens - 4 or more distinct vegetables not mushrooms or fruit (between radish and stambulb)
salt grilled greens - vegetable + rock salt
herb saute - vegetable + goron spice
veggie rice balls - hylian rice + vegetable
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(4 star)
glaxed veggies - courser bee honey + vegetable
steamed tomatoes - hylian tomato + flower (i.e. silent princess)
honeyed apple - courser bee honey + apple
veggie porridge - vegetable + rice + milk
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(5 star)
vegetable curry - carrot + hylian rice + goron spice
hot buttered apple - goat butter + apple
carrot cake - tabantha wheat + cane sugar + goat butter + carrot
vegetable omelet - herb/veg/glour + bird egg + goat butter + rock salt
veggie cream soup - carrot + fresh milk + rock salt
apple pie - apple + goat butter + cane sugar + tabantha wheat
vegetable risotto - carrot + hylian rice + goat butter + rock salt
carrot stew - carrot + tabantha wheat + fresh milk + goat butter
cream of vegetable soup - milk + rock salt + vegetable
hot buttered apple - butter + apple
carrot stew - swift carrot + tabantha wheat + fresh milk + goat butter
veggie cream soup - carrot + fresh milk + rock salt