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2010.08.20 01:59 alaskamiller Flask

Flask is a Python micro-framework for web development. Flask is easy to get started with and a great way to build websites and web applications.

2011.09.07 15:11 solidwhetstone Job postings and design portfolios

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2014.02.03 15:26 The_Last_Castoff IT Career Questions

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2023.06.04 21:33 Hashcrasher Which 2 strains would you choose for outdoor?

I have access to my choice of two clones of the strains listed below. They are described as mature/ "pre-teens". They are sun-acclimated, ready for the backyard - basically plug and play. Since I am only limited to growing two, which 2 would you choose, and more importantly, why? They are all photoperiods, so none of these ladies will be ready for harvest until October+.I'm having a hard time making a final decision, so hopefully this group and help me to make up my mind:
Superboof (Black Cherry Punch x Tropicana Cookies. Breeder cut)
Cobracabanna (breeder - Kind Farms.Passion Snake x Dual OG 4 (Passion Snake = Snakes Cakes S1 Bx ) (Snakes Cake x Snake Lite. Pheno hunted)
Purple Jane Dough (breeder Lumpy's. 50/50. Pheno hunted)
Apple Crisp (Described as an Indica-leaning Hybrid that mixes some of the best phenotypes from the Cookies strain crossed with a Sour Apple x Sour Diesel. Pheno hunted.)
Choka Cola (breeder Marks Organix in York Maine. Granola Funk x Rootbeer x I-95. Breeder cut)
Cap Junky ( breeder Capulator and Seed Junky Genetics. Alien Cookies x Kush Mints #11. Breeder cut)
Banana Creme Cake X Jealousy (breeder Seed Junky - pheno hunted)
Anonymous og (breeder 3C Kushishima - pheno hunted. Strong og Kush derivative)
Gold Dust (breeder Exotic Genetix, crossing Rainbow Runtz x Scotty 2 Hotty. Pheno hunted)
Banana Bellini (breeder Mt Baker Home Grown. Indica. Pheno hunted)
Candied Truffles (Terple #17 (Candy Cut) x White Truffles. Indica dominant.Pheno hunted.)
submitted by Hashcrasher to MDEnts [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:32 Ragnar-Voll Paragon Initative [.NURO] is recruiting!

Paragon Initative [.NURO] [LTRIG] is recruiting PVPERS & drug runners!
NURO is a active EU tz corporation operating in the Immensea region part of the alliance Literally Triggered.
We are mainly a PVP corporation but we operate a number of corporate moons however our main source of income is drug production. We manufacture nearly every type of booster to fund our pvp habits.
What we offer: • Extensive corporate and alliance Infrastructure • Daily fleets with full SRP • Corporation moons with low tax rate • Full drug manufacturing facilities • Experienced corporation and alliance leadership • Doctrine handout ships
What we are looking for: • English speaking • Active on comms (Mumble) • Fleet participation • 10 m skill points
If you're interested join our discord here:
submitted by Ragnar-Voll to evejobs [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:32 No_Acanthaceae_1247 I (22F) want to go on an overseas trip with my best friend (22M) but I recently started dating someone else

My friend is going on a two week trip to asia with his cousins (whom I am also friends with), and invited me to come along. We are completely platonic, I view him like a cousin. We've shared the same bed together multiple times for sleepovers (completely platonically, also while we were single), hang out alot with each other, and overall I would consider him my best friend.
About two weeks ago I started dating a boy, whom I like very much! We were friends for a couple of months before we started dating, and he has met my best friend a couple of times. I was wondering if it would be red flaggy of me to decide to go on this trip with my male best friend, mainly because we might be sharing a hotel room together (his cousins have their own accommodations). I wouldnt mind inviting my bf, but it would be a long shot for him coming since the trip is in a month and a 12 hour flight away. I want to make this relationship work, as I like my bf quite a bit so far, but I can see how one would have reservations about their partner going on an extended trip with an opposite sex best friend. But also, its a rare opportunity for me to travel overseas that I dont want to miss out on.
Would it be selfish of me to go on this trip? I havent bought tickets yet, and this is really the only hurdle blocking me.
submitted by No_Acanthaceae_1247 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:32 FornicateEducate Hard shell case for G&L Tribute Series Fallout?

I've been Googling to find case models that fit the G&L Tribute Series Fallout (the 6-string guitar, not the bass), and haven't had much luck. I own several hard shell cases, including a generic Gator case (rectangular shaped), and a couple cases made for Strats and Telecasters. None of them fit, as either the headstock sticks out of the top, or the neck pocket is in the wrong place to sit properly.
I'm a drummer by trade, but played my first gig on guitar recently, and LOVE this guitar. It plays great, is lightweight but well balanced, and is very versatile with the P90 and humbucker with coil splitter. I want it to be my main axe, but I want something more substantial than a gig bag to protect it.
I found a lot of G&L Tribute Series Fallout posts on this sub, so I ask the owners of this awesome guitar -- what kind of case do you use? How snug is the fit? Thank you!
submitted by FornicateEducate to offset [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:32 chainsawinsect I need you guys' help with something stupid

Ok, so this is gonna be an odd one.
It's not intended to be a Stinkpost, but I saved it for Sunday just in case.
Some necessary context:
For approximately 10 years now, I've been playing in a fan-made 6 v. 6 singles cartridge format inspired by Smogon but that aspires to make as many different fully evolved Pokemon playable within a single tier. It's not perfect, as some Pokemon are simply impossible bad (e.g., Luvdisc) and some Pokemon are so good on stats/typing alone that they rock even heavily restricted (e.g., Aegislash was still OP even after we outright banned King's Shield on him). But it does a decent enough job.
The way we collapse the tiering is by imposing significant estrictions based on power level. For example, the strongest offensive Pokemon generally can't hold Choice items or Life Orb, and only the weakest offensive Pokemon are allowed to Terastalyze. Notably, we have a global rule applicable to all pseudolegendary 'mon that prevents them from holding Choice items, Life Orb, Leftovers, or Assault Vest.
Beyond that, it has the standard Smogon clauses, more or less, plus some additional, very impactful rules. Most notably, Stealth Rock and Swords Dance are banned outright, and all moves must have their base PP (i.e., no PP Ups used). I'd say the format is roughly RU or NU in power level (maybe somewhere in between).
Generally speaking, the only Pokemon that are banned are legendaries. (Other comparably strong Pokemon are allowed but simply heavily restricted.) The rationale for this legendary ban originally (in the X/Y era) was as follows: (1) they're hard to obtain, as they can't be bred and are often event exclusive or transfer only, (2) they are hard to get correct IVs on without hacking or resetting a billion times, and (3) most of them are overpowered given our intentionally suppressed power level.
The current situation:
The passage of time has whittled away the basis for the legendary ban. Power creep among nonlegendaries has given us numerous "stronger than a legendary" 'mon like Aegislash, Toxapex, or Palafin. And old legendaries are no harder for a new player to get than Hisuian evolutions that only evolve in Legends: Arceus, which are allowed. But most notably, Scarlet/Violet makes it so legendaries are actually easier to IV train than nonlegendaries!
So our council is now, for the first time ever, debating removing the legendary ban. We would still ban all legendaries with above 600 base stat total (our current ceiling), which addresses most of the Ubers-tier guys, but everyone else is theoretically fair game.
The problem is that even a "weak" legendary, if completely unhit, would dominate this low power format, and so virtually every legendary would need serious restrictions to be balanced without raising our power level (which we do not want to do). And there are enough 600 bst or below legendaries that balancing each individually would probably more than double the length of our banlist (which we do not want to do either).
So the proposal under consideration is to try to come up with a single rule that addresses almost all of the 600 bst or below legendaries cleanly and makes them acceptable to use. By definition this would "overhit" the weaker legendaries and we are generally OK with that. We are also fine with individually banning a few specific legendaries if necessary for this to work (for example, Urshifu and Chi-Yu seem like they'd be an issue almost no matter what we do).
So, why am I telling you all this?:
I need your help!
Because these are the rules we've played under for years, we have almost no exposure to using any of the legendaries in a competitive game. So, frankly, we don't know what the best way to balance them might realistically be. We don't have the faintest clue!
But you guys, regardless of which Smogon format you play, probably have lots of experience using and going up against these legendaries, and so I want to tap into that experience, if you can spare the time.
So basically, I'm looking for suggestions!
The current "front runner" is: "Legendary Pokemon can't hold items or know status moves." That is extremely restrictive, I recognize, and it may need to be broadened a bit (e.g., maybe they can still hold Berries), but it may also be that we need a different approach entirely. But that at least, I think, would nerf most of the 600 bst and below legendaries down to the point of not being broken (even if it significantly overhits a few poor souls like Kantonian Articuno).
But am I dramatically underestimating or overestimating the legendaries (such that this hit is woefully inadequate or would make them all unplayable)? Are there legendaries that would dominate an RU / NU power level format even with those restrictions (like Chi-Yu)?
What would you do, if you were making a rule to try to solve this problem?
submitted by chainsawinsect to stunfisk [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:32 BSBubbaRobinsonLuv R.T.Grievances? WEE INVISIBLE BEASTIES. 🤔🥴🙄😳🫣😉☺️

I Swear, by the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, And by the holy iron that I hold, To give ye my fealty and to pledge ye my loyalty To the name of clan "kilts clans, highlanders" And if ever I shall raise my hand against ye in rebellion, I ask that this holy iron shall pierce my heart
Je jure, sur la croix de notre Seigneur Jésus-Christ, Et par le fer sacré que je tiens, De t’être fidèle et dévoué, et m’engage à me montrer loyal Envers le nom du clan "kilts clans montagnards" Si d’aventure je levais la main sur toi dans un esprit de rébellion, Je demande que ce fer sacré me transperce le cœur.
submitted by BSBubbaRobinsonLuv to u/BSBubbaRobinsonLuv [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:32 Monkweasel91 Week 7 of Titration and I feel like I'm plateauing. Any advice?

Currently being prescribed Xagitin XL 18mg via Psychiatry UK.
Started on 18mg, increased to 36mg, then to 54mg in weekly increments.
Usually I take medication with food at around 845AM before my workday begins.
Week 2 on 36mg felt the best I have ever felt. I could get stuff done, in complete order as opposed to jumping to multiple tasks at once. I was able to remain focused on conversations, was really productive at home etc.
Then on to 54mg and it seemed far too much at the time - I struggled to have cohesive thoughts and conversations and felt way too 'switched on'. I am in a very public facing, very admin heavy job and it was just all a bit too much, plus it was wiping me out in the evenings.
Was then reduced to 36mg, but felt like it wasn't enough by the second week of taking it again. I was completely exhausted by 2PM and my distractibility and focus was much, much worse. It was then decided that I start taking a 5mg Medikinet instant release midway through the day. This really has helped, but I am starting to feel it not being as effective again.
I feel like I am chasing how I felt in that second week of starting titration.
I'm starting to forget things such as medication prompts, drinking prompts, completing my monitoring forms and I am going back to how things have been.
The benefits I have noticed is my reaction to stress. I feel so calm compared to when I wasn't medicated, it has been amazing for this. The problem is, it's getting to the point that I am not caring about the stressful things and am starting to lose passion in my job, whereas previously, I would still make sure I get everything I needed to get done because I cared so much about doing a good job.
I just feel that at this point, 7 weeks on, that there would be noticeable differences, but I things aren't improving. I'm also worried thaty titration period will soon be up and it's too late to try something else.
Is this normal? Has anyone else experienced similar?
submitted by Monkweasel91 to ADHDUK [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:32 Seven5One I’m in class!

I get so annoyed when people walk up to me in the middle of a training class (we have a small ring so a lot of classes I do back of store) and ask me for help. I’ll direct them and then they want me to walk them over or get mad I’m half paying attention after I explain I’m IN A CLASS. Had a doordasher walk through and shove their phone in my face. Told them the aisle and they wanted me to walk them over. I politely explained no, I can’t right now. They snapped and said “Do your job!”
Thankfully one of my PP is a very sassy woman who immediately started going “SHE IS. SHES BUSY. TEACHING OUR DOGS” and the DD left but come on. I had 6 people do this today in my classes. I’m over it.
submitted by Seven5One to petsmart [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:31 Internal_Ad_8529 If you could have any job in the world, what would it be?

What's the most unique skill you have?
submitted by Internal_Ad_8529 to u/Internal_Ad_8529 [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:31 Trojianmaru Just discovered I completely misunderstood the story of the Golden Knight

So this entire time, I thought that puzzle after the dungeon, told the tale of a Knight who died due to people who have no idea wtf they're doing, trying to tell him what to do. Like in my mind, it was similar to how you can do your job fantastically for years, only to have a boss brought in who has no idea how to do your job, going "well I think you should do this instead"
Here's how I thought the story went:
Picture 1: A simple Knight became famous for surviving many battles and killing men men. His Armour and sword were simple iron, but they got the job done.
Picture 2: Then, due to his achievements, the church decided to bless him with beautiful golden Armour and a beautiful, jewel encrusted, golden sword. (probably just so they can then claim all his successes as being due to their blessings, and not his own skill) Picture 3: His Armour and sword were very pretty, but absolutely useless in battle, so when he next went into battle, he was quickly killed. Picture 4: and now his beautiful golden sword is just a rusted, useless piece of metal, and he lies deaf and rotten in the dirt.
But in reality, the bloody sword is actually the gold sword with blood on it, and the man being killed is using an ace. So his story really ended with him going on to kill many men, and being buried in the crypy with honors.
I still prefer my version better, but of course a noble family would completely miss that golden Armour and swords would be terrible compared to simple iron, and that there's a good reason why those kinds of things are saved only for fancy marches where nobody is actually expected to need to fight (just like how if the British Queen's guard was ever actually sent into battle, they wouldn't need to wear the big fluffy hats and the poofy feathers)
But I literally only just realised that just now, in my 7th playthrough (10th if you count my 3 New Game playthroughs to get S+)
submitted by Trojianmaru to residentevil4 [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:31 orangutanbusiness Shoud I switch job when emotionally drained and apathetic?

For more context I'm 23M IT servicedesk specialist with 4 year of experience. Last 7 months I'm really stressed and apathetic, most of the time I'm convincing myself to do something. Every morning is a battle with thoughts "fuck it I will stay home".
So story is I'm actually changed my job 3 months ago, because of toxic management and too much workload (but everything else was great, I really loved my colleagues, and we still hangout in a week or two).
Current workplace is really different than it was promised in interview like: 1) they said that there will be opportunity to grow skills or grow in a career ladder, but I don't see any, there is no mentor, I didn't have any perfomance review for 3 months so I don't understand how they can understand that am I eligible for promotion. and my daily routine tasks and responsibilities are what I did as intern at first jobs. So for the 3 month I did not really improved anything 2) manager that interviewed me leaved the company after a month I joined the company and more strange that him refused to give me senior position at interviews explaining it with not enough experience(despite the fact in previous company I was a senior, :( but they payed me 20% lower than current job) 3) So basically I don't know is that a con, but most of the day is I don't really have a workload and like I work for 2 maybe 4 hours. Rest of the time I'm just bored and scrolling social media. I've tried to learn some courses at times like it, but it seems ineffective. 4) In previous job ITSD department had like 6 person and I had a connection with them, joking around and having fun between a lot of work, also if I didn't know something I always could ask and get help from my mentor or more senior colleagues. So in a huge contrast at current workplace is just one person who is really introverted 40+ year old guy with whom we may not speak an all day and most of the time he answers idk. I have friends from other department but it's not really the same, we sit separately and see each other only at lunch and coffee break. 5) on interview HR said that in autumn we will have pay raise and bonuses, but recently I've acknowledged that I'm not eligible because I joined company after January
And now I've received offer as system administrator at IT company, pay is the same, still IT support, but most of previous colleagues saying is a good opportunity to grow professionally and switch from support to other directions
but I'm really scared and interview was a little bit strange. like: 1) when I asked about grow, manager interviewing me asked will I leave him to another department after 1 year and troubling him to find another employee. I've replied that I think if I need to grow I will need to stay for 2 years anyway(I think it was a mistake saying that) 2) Interview was on a lunch time and he asked am I ok with that, I said that's ok and he said perfect(is that means that is common situation in his dep?) 3) when I received an offer, I've asked a recruiter is that possible to visit office and take a look on workplace and atmosphere, she replied manager is asking "are we accepting the offer or not"
I've accepted the offer on Friday but didn't gave a notice to my current employer a yet.
My problem is that I feel like I'm stuck with IT support work which I really dislike and I'm scared that new employer will not change my current emotional and professional situation. Maybe it will get even worse, because even if my current job doesn't give me any opportunities but on other side there is no huge workload nor toxic management.
submitted by orangutanbusiness to careerguidance [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:31 No-Grape7546 If you could have any job in the world, but only for one day, what would it be?

If you could have a conversation with any historical figure, who would it be and why?
submitted by No-Grape7546 to u/No-Grape7546 [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:31 PlusCoast1489 Am I the only one who really developped AvPD during early adulthood ?

Sorry about the lenght, TL:DR at the end.
I'm a 24 year old who has only very recently found out about Avoidant Personality Disorder. I couldn't quite explain what was happening to me before then. I truly felt alone and attributed my symptoms to a combination of a variety of illnesses or disorders in an attempt to self diagnose.
Even though I relate to the vast majority of experiences described by my fellow avoidants, one thing I don't share with most is the fact that my disorder is not (or does not feel) rooted in my early childhood, and I have only been experiencing all these symptoms progressively in the last 5 years following a series of traumatic events.
I was a in fact a very happy child, the first 10 years of my life are filled with almost nothing but good memories, I was a healthy, social, outgoing child who had tons of friends and very good relationships with my extended family.
As soon as I got into Middle School (age 11 in France), I was subjected to so much rejection and scrutiny by other kids and my own best friends that it entirely shut me down, I became somewhat reserved and had my first wave of depression and suicidal thoughts. I didn't handle it well and acted like an asshole to most other students to cope, which made these years hell for me. My relationships with my family went downhill and never recovered, to this day I still feel like they greatly dislike me for keeping to myself so much, and are even ashamed of calling me family.
I got to a better place mentally once I left that school at 16 years old, made a lot of new friends that happened to share my sense of humor even though I was now deeply introverted. And I enjoyed a somewhat healthy social life, but only at school. (Never got invited to anything outside of school, didn't even have their phone numbers).
I graduated High school at 19 and lost contact with said friends, (as I said our friendship was limited to a school setting). I entered the work force as an electrician and now had to interact with nothing but older adults. This was such a great shift that I quickly developped extreme social anxiety, my self-esteem also worsened because I was complete sh*t at my job, both in terms of skill and physical strenght (I was remarkably weak), causing coworkers to straight up hate me for my incompetence, and often calling me out. I worked in 6 different companies in the span of 2 years before giving up on the very well paying job of electrician. I started doing odd jobs and a lot of factory work (been working some place for the last 5 months and i'm really good at it and even enjoy it so there's that).
After years of trying and failling at making any friends because of my social anxiety, I moved to the other side of the country and met 2 guys that also had moved in from up north and didn't know anyone in the region. We really hit it off and went out every week, drinking, smoking and partying anytime we had free time. I felt like I was finally out of it, I finally had actual "outside" friends for the first time in more than 10 years. I felt my anxiety getting better although I still worried about them only tolerating me and only going out with me because they didn't know many other people and related to me being a Poc like them in a region that was was overwhelmingly white. After 4 months, one of them expressed to the other that he disliked me (which the other told me about the next day as if it wasn't a big deal) and they both ended up ghosting me suddenly.
That hit me extremely hard, every memory of feeling inadequate and unloved since age 10 hit me all at once, all my friends in middle school rejecting me, my family distancing themselves from me, including my own sister and father who I haven't seen in 6 years, my high school friends only tolerating me within the school grounds, my coworkers calling me a literal burden to my face. and I've been living the past 2 years with the constant feeling of being an unlikable, unlovable, asocial, weirdo.
Been living with AvPD for the last 5 years (19-24yo) due to traumatic periods of my life mainly in adulthood. I was brought down by coworkers and ghosted by the only friends i'd made in the last 10 years, I'm now scared of looking at people in the eye, hate physical contact with anyone but my mother, scared of intimacy while also craving it, have social anxiety, frequent panic attacks, mental breakdowns, and the emotional strenght of a 7 year old girl, along with every single symptoms of AvPD.
I just want to know if anyone can relate to developping the disorder so suddenly.
submitted by PlusCoast1489 to AvPD [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:31 LittleKdawg is it possable to make a python exe make a folder and put txt files in there and then root back to them and use it during the codes run time

i have created a python exe with multiple txt files which get created when the exe is run. i was wondering if it was possible for the exe to make a folder and put the txt files in there and then use them with no path. the main reason there is no path is bc i am going to give this to a friend.
if you need to see the code lmk and i will post here ^
submitted by LittleKdawg to learnpython [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:31 Bruhmangoddman I have evidence, Your Honor! That AJ didn't ruin or damage the franchise.

No. 1. Many people came to love Phoenix's new persona in time and gained appreciation for what the story tried to do with him. And there were vehement defenders of his metamorphosis early after the game's release.
No. 2. The music. Many of you may not know Toshihiko Horiyama's name, but those that do surely recognize him as the lead composer for Apollo Justice! Much like after AJ's release, modern AA fans still have a lot of admiration and love for the soundtrack. Highlights according to fandom include: Apollo, Trucy, Klavier, Zak/Valant, Drew/Vera's themes, Reminiscenes in the form of A Fate Smeared By Tricks and Gadgets as well as Forgotten Legend, the Pursuit theme - Overtaken, and finally a new spin on Telling The Truth.
No. 3. The atmosphere. AJ gets a lot of flack for its writing, mystery and cast importance, but the atmosphere remains a consistently praised factor in the game. The bone chilling soundtrack at times, the menacing sprites for Kristoph, Phoenix, Winfred and Daryan, the absolutely fucked up story behind the Mishams and the Gramaryes, the main villain, and the overall vibe of the game see a lot of positive reciprocation.
No. 4. The Gramaryes. The Troupe remains one of the more consistently debated topics as part of the fandom discourse. It is, in my humble opinion, AJ's silent triumph and its incredible narrative merit. The Gramaryes have generated so much discussion in regards to their morality: something the Feys (Ha!) or the Khura'ins (this I'm kinda disappointed by) did not achieve. The game boards back then and Reddit threads today battle over such topics as: was Zak truly a jerk, was Valant truly the "good" Gramarye, were there any jerks at all, who was more at fault: Zak or Valant, and many other things, with SOJ adding some new flavor. The ambiguity and complexity of the actions of Troupe Gramarye spurned so much in-depth, fascinating discussion it speaks to AJ's narrative prowess and provides a relevant counter against the game's critics.
The defense pleads the court to declare Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney not guilty of the charges it's being tried for.
submitted by Bruhmangoddman to AceAttorney [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:31 bornntolose Moving Back to Australia

Hi everybody,
I moved out to Australia under a Permanent Residence visa in 2017, with the intention of staying on a permanent basis. I ended up retiring to Scotland with the intention of finishing university before returning. In that time I met my now wife and have had a baby.
I've done some reading up on it and it seems I am eligible to apply for a residents return visa within ten years of my last visit to Australia , with supporting documentation justifying my absence from the country. I am wondering if anybody can has some experience or can shed some light on the residents return visa and if it's possible for me to move back? As well as the process for my family. I'm sure I would need to have a job offer from an Australian company and return to Australia ahead of my family, would this be correct?
submitted by bornntolose to AskAnAustralian [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:30 CCtenor Be wary of your own expectations

I’m writing this more as a PSA than for support, although these thoughts to come from some recent frustrations over some events that have transpired, and decisions I’ve had to make.
If you’ve been diagnosed with ADHD as an adult, be wary of your own expectations. Be wary of continuing to believe that you can continue doing life the same way you did life before your diagnoses, especially if part of the reason you were diagnosed is related to burnout, mental health, or life otherwise falling apart on you.
I grew up with undiagnosed ADHD. Prior to my diagnoses, I only really did 2 things in my life. I worked, and I participated on a worship team as a leader, and then an arranger. As a result of the way my behavior was condemned by my home environment growing up, and how strict it was, I basically had no social life. It was too difficult to jump through all the hoops I needed to plan anything with friends, the core people I looked to for guidance wouldn’t allow me to develop my own solutions to problems I encountered, and I was slowly taught not to trust in my own judgment, or in the ability of anybody outside of my nuclear family to care about me as much as those within it.
As a result of my family structure eventually causing the breakup of my first and only relationship, I entered a depression that stayed with me for years, slowly and barely improving, but never going away. While being in college at the time put me in contact with some friends and events, graduating college and beginning to work professionally meant that I lost what little social life I had. The rest of my time became dedicated to work, my worship team, and choir - something that had become my therapy after my breakup.
The lack of a social life eventually took its toll, though. The only place I felt more fully understood and not judged for my differences were in choir, but that wasn’t something I could guarantee participation in, especially given the pandemic which began a short while ago.
Almost 4 months of business travel shortly after the pandemic began, and lockdowns were beginning, wore me out. I had a panic attack and decided to head into therapy.
Therapy lead to discussions of ADHD.
After a year of working on my trauma with my therapist, I felt ready to tackle making a psychiatric appointment, which led to an official diagnoses and beginning of medication.
That same year, I also finally had the energy to start building a social life. With medication, a diagnoses that allowed me to stop blaming myself for “being broken”, and a better understanding of how my trauma affected me and how to overcome, I felt like I could improve.
And I did.
I genuinely feel more satisfied with my life now.
While I accepted and understood the limitations that ADHD had placed on my life, I never truly and fully let go of my expectation that I’d be able to just do the same thing I always did l, snd just add in the parts that were missing. Like I said before, pretty much my entire life before I was diagnosed was dedicated to preparing materials, and sharpening my skills, for my worship team.
Which I enjoyed, but took the ability to do so completely for granted as I now added regular, and big, social events to my life that also required their own planning. Now I’m going to MegaCon every year. Now I’m going to Dapper Day every spring and fall. I went from dreaming of maybe cosplaying some characters some day, to coordinating multiple group outfits with different sets of friends 3 times a year. Now I’m starting to see movies when I’d like, and now I’m trying to find the time to look for, and plan, smaller events I can attend more regularly where I live, instead of just depending on 3 MASSIVE doses of validation a year.
And not once did I give serious thought to the fact that I wouldn’t be able to sustain adding these while continuing to invest as much effort into my worship team, or my job.
Until, during a meeting this past Friday to address my inability to meet the FIRST set of deliverables for my PIP (performance improvement plan), and I was forced to QUICKLY decide what matters most to me.
I NEED this job. It’s what gives me the money to access the healthcare I’ve been using to improve my mental health by investing in my hobbies, and develop social connections with people who have, or understand, the struggles, I face.
I will not give up the social life I’ve begun to develop, because that budding social life has been what I’ve been working towards in therapy and ADHD treatment.
Which means that I simply cannot sustain the same effort I’ve been putting into my worship team. I might be able to maybe prepare myself, but my church isn’t affluent enough to compensate me what I’d need for me to continue risking my job by burning more energy than I have on what amounts to a part time music teaching job to help other members of the worship team grow.
I no longer have the time or energy reserve to be a teacher, a professional, and a person.
I must be a professional.
I will not give up being a person.
The best I can do is be a participant, but I’ve been burning the candle at both ends for longer than I should have, and need to rest.
Be wary of the expectations you used to have about yourself, because you might not be able to meet them if there are things you need to change in your life to improve or grow.
submitted by CCtenor to ADHD [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:30 Haunted_Purpose The cast looks older than their characters, even though they're not

In the first season, the main cast, I mean the three girls and Lewis, are about sixteen/seventeen years old, I think. Is it just me, or do normal sixteen/seventeen-year-olds look younger than that?
submitted by Haunted_Purpose to JustAddWater [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:30 No-Constant9087 Why would my mom say that?

Okay, I'm so angry right now. So my mom called me today, asking what I'm doing, etc., and I had a bit of a sleepy voice because I was tired. She asked why I was depressed, to which I answered that I'm not. Then, out of nowhere, she told me I should take a rope and hang myself? We weren't arguing; it was just casual talk, and she told me this? I immediately hung up on her and was extremely shocked and started crying. I still can't process it and don't believe she actually said that. It hurt me at first, but now I'm extremely angry and disgusted by it. We have a pretty good relationship. Last year, I was actually struggling with my mental health because I graduated from college, had no job, and felt a bit lost in life. Both of my parents were concerned about me and were helping me get through that time. I can say that I'm the happiest I've ever been now, just enjoying life and working on my career. Why would she say that to me? I don't want to talk about it with her or anyone else close to me. I'm ashamed that my own mother would say something so hurtful to her child. She's acting like nothing happened now, and I don't think she realizes how much it hurt me.
submitted by No-Constant9087 to TrueOffMyChest [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:30 notpaulrudd How to attach second story deck ledger when theres a 3.5" drop from the back door?

My 2nd story deck was installed by the previous owner and has a 3.5" drop from the back door. I just finished flashing the ledger and want to do a better job securing it. The lags he used are a mix of 3.5" and 4" long 3/8" galvanized, the top row go into blocking between floor joists (my house doesn't have a rim joist), while on the lower row some go into the top plate, and a few only go into sheathing.
My plan is to leave the existing lags, add 4 Simpson lateral tension ties into the top plate, and add 5" ledgerloks in staggered rows, but I have a few questions:
  1. Is blocking acceptable, or do you need to attach to a rim joist?
  2. The top row of ledgerloks will fully penetrate the blocking, the bottom row will have to go into the top plate. Are you allowed to attach a ledger to the top plate?
  3. Can i put silicone caulk in the holes to help prevent moisture intrusion? Is there any kind of wood preservative I could use? The top plate and blocking aren't pressure treated.
submitted by notpaulrudd to HomeImprovement [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:30 wild85bill How did this form (details in description, it formed quickly)

How did this form (details in description, it formed quickly)
Looked like a land spout coming down, then it started pulling in on the left and right side of where it connect to the main cloud. It happened so fast by the time I saw it form, stopped the 4 wheeler, and got my phone out, it developed this much. It acted like an inflow cloud but never saw one form this quick.
submitted by wild85bill to weather [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 21:30 TricksterD3 Where do I go from here?

I just am not sure of my next step. I’ve been in public for almost 2.5 years (currently a senior) and will officially have my license on the 15th of this month. I will also be graduating with my MBA in August. I am really hating public at the moment, but there is a local firm where I live where I could easily take over and set up my own practice. My wife is well known in the community and the woman that currently owns it is our neighborhood and she told me she’s looking to retire in the next 5 years. She makes good money and is seen on the golf course at random days in the week. Although she is always drowning around during tax season. I guess my question is, should I stick it out in public to at least get manager type experience. Or should I job hop to industry to make myself happier now.
submitted by TricksterD3 to Accounting [link] [comments]